You mentioned you live in an apt. Most apt complexes have a community room (or whatever they call it) that can be leased out by their tenants fairly inexpensively (sometimes free). They of course come with stipulations, sometimes they have to be cleaned afterwards, sometimes that is included. Sometimes you can have alcohol, sometimes you can't...etc.
Now as far as the adult birthday party. My 30th was a couple of years ago, and my mother got a sheet of butcher paper that rolled out to about 20 feet long. She had copies of pictures made from the time I was born until present, including lots of the people who were at the party with me. People also brought their own pictures and put them on in addition to my mom's photos. It was a lot of fun for people I know now to see photos of my funky teen years...and they all signed it. I still have it, and it will be alot of fun to look at for years to come.
I did a video for my husband for our 10th anniversary in a similar way, with photos/music of my husband and I from birth through present. I included monumental events (graduations, wedding, childrens births, etc.) It was INCREDIBLY time consuming (partially because it was a suprise so I coudln't just work on it any time I had time). But, my husband actually CRIED. He has really enjoyed it alot...so it was very well worth it.
At another 50th birthday I attended, a huge timeline (created again on the butcher paper) was created with monumental events/photos of the birthday person. Attendees were directed in the invitation to bring any photos they had with the birthday person during their "years together". You know you see some old friends (high school, college, distant family, first job co-workers, etc.) friends during these things that you dont see every day. It was alot of fun too and didnt require so much work on the person planning it, other than prior to the event putting all the major dates on it. It could be really creative/artsy, or not so much, with the photos being the focal point. It was really cute at the end...and there were messages/signatures from all the attendees with their respective photos. It was fun.
As far as the 1 year old's birthday party...the real reason for that is photos (as far as I am concerned). Have it at a park, or somewhere REALLLLLLLY cheap, cause you will have LOTS of opportunity for more demanding parties later! :) Good luck!