Ok... I've been in all different types of situations with my ex and my hubby now. Neither one has ever understood my sleep disorder, but now that I'm on medication, I can function normally so no one has to understand it... If he's sleeping 10-12hrs every night, he may have a sleep disorder... However, even having Hypersomnia with long sleep cycles, I still managed to do all the kid things on my own. So your hubby should be able to help you as well.
I have a 7yr old daughter (1st marriage) and a 2yr old son (2nd marriage). I work full time (always have) and my hubby works with me. We have the same work schedule! I HAVE to tell him, 'come in from the garage and HELP ME NOW.' If I don't tell him that, I will get no help. Reason-
MEN DON'T UNDERSTAND HINTS!!!!
My husband fully understands that if I ask him to come in and help and he doesn't... He gets no lovin from me later.
My schedule is as follows EVERYDAY.
5:45a - Wake up, get dressed, brush teeth.
6:00a - Get lunches made & packed for hubby & I. And breakfast for our son that is in daycare packed.
6:15a - Hubby gets up, gets dressed, and brushes teeth while I go and get the kids up and dressed (my mom comes to see my daughter off to school).
6:30a - My mom shows up and hubby gets all the stuff for the day out to the car. We leave and take our son to daycare.
7:30a - Get to work.
4:15p - Leave work.
5:00p - Pick son up at daycare and daughter up from my mom's.
5:30p - Get home. Hubby goes out to garage to tinker on MY project car and drink beer. I start dinner and help daughter with homework... Attempt to entertain son during this multitasking.
6:00p - Ask daughter if she can play with her brother for a few minutes while I get the table set for dinner.
6:30p - Eat dinner - Have to call hubby in to eat.
7:00p - Hubby helps put leftovers away & rinses dishes, goes back out to garage. I get kids in the bathtub & get them cleaned up.
7:20p - Fight kids to get them out of the tub.
7:30p - Text hubby to come and give the kids kisses for bed. Read son a book & he goes to bed.
8:00p - Have daughter call her dad to say goodnight. She likes to watch 1/2hr of TV and then goes to bed.
8:30p - I take shower & fold laundry from the night before (washing & drying).
9:00p - Go out to garage and give hubby kiss goodnight and he gets upset because I'm not out there working on MY project car with him & going to bed instead.
10:00p - Hubby comes in, takes a shower, and wants some lovin... Gets shut down if he was no help (which is common).
I have to tell my husband all the time... 'You want anything from me, you have to stop drinking beer right now and come in and help me out!'
And it's not that I don't want it too... But I can go to sleep without... : )
No one is screaming in my house, but we are EXTREMELY scheduled. Even when my son was around 8mos old, we had him on a schedule... Yes, that means even when he awoke for food and diaper change. I managed to set that by waking him up just before I went to bed to feed and change him... He fell right back to sleep when we were done. I've always been the one that got up with both kids... Whether with my ex or with my hubby now.
With my ex it was World of Warcraft and StarTrek... With my hubby now, it's MY car, his motorcycle, and beer.