Went to a 5 year old's birthday party. Don't know the parents well at all, just our kids are in the same preschool class. They had a beautiful big house with a lovely property. However, the party was on the driveway, the whole party. On the driveway. There were about 25-30 people total and two chairs. The dad of the birthday boy was in one of them most of the time. They had an equal number of juice boxes as they had kids, and for adults? A BIG cooler filled with beer. It was an 11AM party. Did I type that correctly? YES. ELEVEN AM, and BEER. They brought out warm waters at the end of the party. There was pregnant lady there. She was never offered a chair. I looked around, and saw the dad of the birthday boy drinking, and one other dad. Everyone else (adults), had nothing. I find a problem with this, but I'm sure ONE of you or more will find a way to try to put me in my place. LOL. Go for it.
Seriously, though. Crazy, right? Beer? No seating? Driveway? Beautiful property and house? I mean, I'm crazy to be shocked, right?
ADDED: Mom was nice. She was there socializing, serving the food, and played a game with them. It seemed okay for the kids. They seemed to be fairly pleased. There was a pinata.
Parents drop-off? If that was the case, there wouldn't be a bunch of beer and Um, it was a pre-school class. I know of no pre-school parents that would drop-off their kids... They still stay for a 3rd-grader's party (in my experience).
BTW, I'm a beer drinker (I actually have a beer with me right now), but there's the saying "it's 5 o clock somewhere" for a reason... it isn't applauded that one drinks in the morning... LOL. So, I don't have a problem with beer, either.... just the time of day for it:)
Suz T. It was a joke. Hence the "LOL". That part was just simply in fun and I thought everyone else would interpret it as a joke as well:) You know, there always seems to be that one person that tries to make you feel bad about asking a question. Instead of getting mad about it, I take it very lightly and make it funny:) I'm a sarcastic person... hence the title of the question:)
Oh, and I like outside OR inside parties, both are fine... it is just standing on a driveway (no soft cushy ground) for 2 hours isn't the worst, but it isn't very comfortable either, especially if you are prego. Grass was avoided just cause it was strongly implied, "stay on the driveway" It was a hike to get to the house, by the way. They have a LONG private drive (not the driveway I was referring to, but the drive to get to the driveway) and they didn't want anyone parking on it. It was wide enough for definitely two cars to pass at least. That was another highlight. I LOOOVE hiking, by the way, but I find it very poor taste to be made to do so just to get to someone's house for a party...
That's atrocious! If they didn't want to have people at their house, they shouldn't have held the party AT THEIR HOUSE. How incredibly rude. But, it's done and over with , so what can you do? I just wouldn't accept another invite to a party at that house again!
No seating and no drinks is ridiculous. The driveway and beer is a to each his own situation in my opinion. Some (most,IMO) people think everyone thinks and acts like they do and if they don't, oh well.
Very strange!!!! I would not accept any more invitations to that house. Guess it takes all kinds to make the world go round!
No, you aren't crazy....I am shocked too by this. Obviously, they do not know how to host a party. My heart goes out to that poor pregnant lady. Just because they have the money for a nice house, doesn't mean that they have class.
umm...I have been to several birthday parties and this situation is just WIERD. I can't believe they had it in the driveway, at 11am and with BEER.--no chairs, no waters, etc. That is soooo crazy to me! I would be pissed for going to such a thing that treated the guests that way. How could the kids or anyone else possibly have a good time? Your not crazy and your not being picky. I would avoid this fam like the plague. They obviously don't have any manners. GL
i have no issue with the driveway or beer part, but they should have had water or sodas for everyone from the first moment. and give the poor lady a place to sit!
Wow, I would have been shocked too. I happen to be a germaphobe, so I dread people being in my house. That part I get. HOWEVER, if I was to keep everyone outside I still need to be a good hostess, which means- chairs, cold drinks (not just alcoholic), manners!!
Don't feel bad at all about your reaction, I'm right with ya. Wow.
I have some really good friends I've known for years. They are nice, their kids are sweet and they have a beautiful home, and a large well-manicured yard.
Yet, these people are the worst hosts I've ever met. They are uneasy with people over. You can just tell. And they have had parties for their kids and for themselves. But it's always awkward. There is never enough to drink or eat. And their food choices are strange.
I'd say these driveway people are like that. Maybe well-meaning, but really bad at hosting.
Some people are just terrible hosts.
Woah. I could understand it being outside if it was a nice day, you don't want 30 people getting your house filthy. Eh. My son's bday last year was mostly held outside, and our house was a rental and not extremely nice. But no seating?? No WATER? That's just crazy. Some people just don't think things out. I would have left the party, gone to the store, and come back with a 24 pack of water bottles and sat on the driveway. Maybe sat in the grass?? You should have asked if you could use the restroom. DId they have you guys squat on the lawn?
You're not crazy. Those people have never thrown a party before. And have no sense of other's needs.
The Beer and the drive way are ok, but obviously they needed chairs, water, or other beverages for people that did not want to drink beer. Where was the wife?
They sound pretty clueless.
I am with you, I think it was in poor taste and I am guessing they didn't really plan it out very well or just weren't thinking straight. I'm not sure how they expect a bunch of kids at a party to have fun just in the driveway, and not end up running around on the lawn. I would expect there to be adequate seating and drinks for the adults besides beer - the beer itself wouldn't bother me as much, but really, there should be other options, no matter what time of day. To not even offer one of the chairs to the pregnant mom speaks volumes.
Just because one has money, does not mean they have class.
It sounds like they didn't have a proper venue and didn't really want to have it at home. Not offering a pregnant woman a place to sit is poor form.
No problems with the beer or driveway part -especially for a preschool birthday -but they should have had a lot more to drink that was also non-alcoholic. They should have also had more chairs -or someone sitting in one of the two chairs should have offered the pregnant woman one of them.
Crazy to be shocked? I think you'd be crazy if you weren't shocked. Some people are born without the "gracious" gene!
I'm not defending these people but i'm wondering if they didn't plan on the adults staying. At 5 you usually do get a fair amount that stay, but they might not have thought of that.
I'm curious as to where the mom was, and to what the children were doing, bounce house? a clown or something?
I think alcohol at a childs party that isn't strickly family is crappy.
Nothing wrong with serving beer. I mean no one was getting drunk right? When my kids were little our friends and family would have huge family parties, beer was always served along with lots of other beverage choices. I will say we went all out with fun, food, bouncy houses, beach parties, pinatas, beautiful backyards and really a good time for all ages.
I think you w're focusing on the beer because it seemed like the only adult "luxury" (I know it's beer not a luxury but you get what I mean) thing they did. If they'd been really great hosts, had lots of non-alcohol drinks, great food and a comfortable atmosphere for everyone you would likely have been talking about what a great party it was even if they served beer at 11 am.
I've been to some really weird kid parties. One they only served hot dogs and chips nothing else. No adult food, no fruit or salad and yes it was meant to be families not just kids. Here's the kicker the Dad was drinking beer himself but none was offered to anyone else. I had a juice box for lunch!
Always good to have some lawn chairs in your trunk for occasions such as this. Sounds like they are sort of new at it, maybe didnt specify there would be alcohol and that you need to bring chairs. But NOW you know, right?
It's Sunday... the 5:00 somewhere rule doesn't count on weekends.
You now know what to expect if your kid gets invited next year.
All parties are different... and then gossiped about afterwards.
Yep that is very odd. At the least they should have stocked the cooler with sodas and waters in addition to the beer. Not everyone drinks beer no matter what time of day it is. Of course parents are going to stay for a preschool aged party, it's not cool at all the husband was fine to sit while everyone else stood. Oh well, they were friendly and good to the kids. The kids had fun. They probably aren't trying to be rude, party hosting just isn't their strength.
yes, it's odd. so is your oddly phrased question and caveat halfway through that someone might try to 'put you in your place.'
why so defensive?
khairete
S.
So, where were the kids, in particular, the birthday child?
Seriously, kid's parties seem to have become all about the adults and entertaining THEM.
I never expected to be fed and entertained when I accompanied one of my very young children to a birthday party (which was still a rare thing back in the late 90's.)
And if they were drinking beer at 11 AM? Well, no big loss as I'm sure we wouldn't really be hanging out in the future anyway!
i think the only two things that were weird is that they have a beautiful property but had the party on the driveway.. that seems a little strange and how can u have a party knowing that many people will be there and u only have 2 chairs?? beer at 11am.. hell its the weekend who cares im actually surprised that only 2 people were drinking iit lol
It doesn't sound like my idea of a good time, but I can understand *some* of it. I have hosted a party on my driveway/garage before b/c I don't have a large house and live in a condo so I don't have a yard per se. However, it was a family party and everyone could go inside if they wanted to, and we have a few chairs. I can honestly say we don't have a ton of chairs, but we try to borrow some when we have events (not frequent) at our house. I do think it is pretty bad form for the birthday boy's father to occupy the seat the entire time if seating was that limited.
When I go with my children to birthday parties I don't expect the host to provide drinks/food for me. With that said, I have never been to a party where the host hasn't at least offered water.
Beer? Well it isn't my thing at a children's party but I guess I can't fault another family for offering it. I generally think this is more appropriate at family gatherings or events with close friends only. It does seem a little odd at a party with classmates where many of the adults there are acquaintances at best.
Hopefully your child isn't best friends with the birthday boy so you wont have to deal with too many playdates!
All in all this does not sound like a party I would enjoy, but I guess it will make for a good story. :)
Hi, M.:
If you are offended by anything someone says or does,
it is your responsibility to get your own needs met.
If drinking was a problem, don't drink.
If a pregnant give was standing, ask her if she needs to sit down. If she
says "Yes" ask her if it is alright if you ask for a chair.
If you were offended by anything, you can't change people, you can
only change yourself.
You could have excused yourself and gone home.
It's tough living in today's world.
Take care of yourself and your family.
all the best.
D.
