I am a teacher and yes, I am offended.
At my school (community college) honor students invite faculty to honor at a banquet that they completely organize and pay for. It is a wonderful experience because the teachers are invited by students who then explain why that particular teacher was important to them. I love the chance to meet with my colleagues to be reminded of the value in what we do. It really does re-energize us and is a great way to improve the overall environment for everyone. Yesterday our education students (future teachers) brought treats in and sent out an email that beautifully expressed their appreciation for us and their commitment to the teaching profession. Considering my school is facing something like 6 million in cuts after already having taking 5 million in cuts, that email was hugely important to me.
So why am I offended by your post? You are upper middle class and think that only low income schools have behavioral problems and parents that are not engaged.... "in a lower income school district where perhaps parents aren't engaged, kids misbehave, they don't speak English." Do you really believe that there are not behavioral issues or family issues or apathetic parents in wealthy neighborhoods? Wow. ADHD, learning disabilities, social problems, emotional problems, bullying....all of these things exists in every level of society and therefore in every school. And teachers need to deal with these issues all the time and it is exhausting. To teach well requires an amazing amount of energy, intelligence, compassion and passion. To teach well for a lifetime takes dedication and a true commitment to the idea of service, service to each student, each family and to the entire community. People who choose to teach believe that their actions can make the world a better place, which I know seems ridiculously naive, but if you talk to most teachers who stick with it, that is the reason. We are optimists. We love our students. We believe that access to education can make all the difference in the world to a child.
Oh...and all the teachers I know have to work during the summer, either updating their credentials or simply to make enough money to survive. I have not had a summer "off" in ten years and neither has my husband. Oh, and we work most weekends too.
Last thing, because of the current anti-teacher rhetoric and the lack of pay and the increasingly impossible working conditions, I have been strongly encouraging my son (who would be a brilliant teacher) to absolutely NOT be a teacher. My point here is, we NEED teachers, good PROFESSIONAL teachers and if we do not recognize and appreciate the value they have in our society, we should not be surprised when we cannot get the best and brightest to become teachers and then commit to the profession for a lifetime. That is already starting to happen.
You seem to think that only teachers who have it "bad" need to have any kind of appreciation day. These people are spending a huge amount of time with your children. How can you not appreciate this....especially if you are lucky enough to live in a neighborhood that allows your children to have access to a great environment?
If you don't like your daughter's teacher, then deal with it by talking with her and the principal.
BTW, my kids are at a great school and we have a very elaborate teacher appreciation day twice a year during the conference periods so that they can get lunch easily. I also have my kids write very personal thank you notes at the end of the year to make sure that they understand the importance of recognizing the work their teachers have done for them.
Updated: P.. I am glad you responded and I am glad you asked this question because I have learned something and you are helping me understand how to make a decision about whether to stay in teaching. You are absolutely right that you have worked for what you have and that it is is not "luck." You do absolutely deserve what you have worked for.
Here is the problem for teachers, especially teachers who are not married to high-wage earners. No matter how hard I work (or how hard my husband works) we will never, ever be able to live in a neighborhood with decent schools. Why? Because we are teachers. The irony here is amazing. In order to dedicate my life to teaching the (adult) children of other people, I am not able to provide for my own children in the way that every good mother wants to. (Because of where I teach I can't "get my kid in" to the great schools which is a perk some teachers do get.)
So how do I get to live in a neighborhood with good schools (and without the gang violence and crime of my working class neighborhood )? There is only one way. We stop teaching, which is something we are both considering right now. Until recently we have sent our children to a small, but affordable Catholic school. But we are facing a 10% salary cut and it is very likely that I am going to have to choose between my children's education and my profession.