Is My Son a Brat? or Is This Normal Behavior?

Perfectly normal! I have a nearly 3yo boy and he does the same things. He unfortunately doesn't spend a lot of time with kids his age but usually does okay with them. He actually has a harder time sharing his toys with mommy and daddy or letting his 5mo brother play with any toys. The worst is sharing his grandparents with his brother. It's just the age.

This is normal they don't understand sharing at this age and its a process of learning. And it normal to have tantrums when he doesn't get what he wants, the key is not to give in to them, thats what makes normal toddler become a brat as they grow up. Again, it a learned thing. I've seen kids screaming at mom to buy something for them in the store (malls, walmart) or they wanted to go to McD's, after telling them no several times, the kid gets louder, and louder and finally mom gives in. That just tells them they are in charge and moms not. Kids will always test the boundaries, (thats their job) and it you job to keep him withing the boundaries. So, anyway don't worry about it for now, use your common sense and do the best you can.

Short answer is--it's normal. Don't let your parents tell you otherwise or act like it's your fault. I think GP's have selective memory when it comes to that. My daughter was and is a strong-willed child, so my other suggestion is to not engage in the struggle. If he throws a fit, either physically move him to safe place or leave the situation. Then just let him do his thing until he wears down. Trying to calm him might just make it worse and drive you to the point of tears. At the same time, I still wouldn't give in to the tantrums because it just encourages them in the future. Insist that he give the toy back, try to redirect if you can, but if he throws a fit let him. Good luck! It gets better! (And if you get a good teacher, she'll have lots of ideas, too.)

I dont think hes a brat.My son is the same way I think its worst because he is the only child and he is used to just having everything to himself but he will get better my son is 3.5 and he has improved a little on the sharing.

H... don't worry. it is totally normal. Although embarrassing at times 2 year olds definitely have a mind of their own. It will pass :-)

It is normal for a 2 year old. :) Welcome to the terrible 2s, 3s, 4s, and so on. :) Once he is in school he will learn to share with the other children. I have seen 2 year olds tell each other "no mine" just to be told "no share." Some kids are also perfect angels for other people and when you get them they turn into little devils. It all works out though. :)

WELCOME to the wonderful world of toddlerhood. My daughter didn't enter it until 3 1/2, however my son right around 2 did. It is about being independent, testing boundaries, frustration not being able to communicate well verbally, wanting immediate results. Tantrums come with the territory. You were so great in removing him. As a parent when I am out, I am oblivious to other kids tantrums or my own, it isn't embarassing it is normal. Just stay calm, put him in the car and explain if he cannot play nice he has to leave, period. I have left MANY parks with a kid not happy about it. It is just to teach them that when you say something you mean it, consistency is crucial right now.
No room for discussion. School will be great for him don't worry. Kids are worst for their parents because they know we will love them no matter how they act. He will learn structure, playing with others and enjoy it! Just keep doing what you are doing, it is normal and you are doing a great job!

kids have bad days too. the main focus for you is to not feel embarrassed by your son's behavior. that creates too much stress for you and your child. you did the right thing by calmly removing him from the activity. if you continue to remove him CALMLY and lovingly he will get the picture.

Your son is not a brat! children under about 2 1/2 to 3 yrs old just don't understand sharing yet. They tend to be very possesive and not wanting others to touch "their" stuff. I have a little girl just over 2 1/2 and she is the same. It is very frustrating to a child when they are removed from a situation they can't comprehend. Especially if you are "punishing" the child or telling them that what they were doing is wrong. NOT that I am saying YOU specifically were punishing him. I am sure you were just removing him from the situation.

I try hard to use words like, "It's fun to share with your friends." "Isn't it neat that you both can have a turn." Make sharing exciting.... not just something he HAS to do. Let him have a turn for a couple minutes, and then say - "OH wow, look now it's Johnny's turn. Let's watch Johnny try it. Neat, Johnny likes it just like you do." "What a good boy, you take turn so well!"

Good Luck, hang it there - it gets better soon!
J.

I don't think your child is a brat. I think it is pretty normal for this age. Has your son been involved with other kids the first couple of years? If not, he may have some learning still to do about sharing and school should catch him up quickly. My son who is three has been going to about 2 playgroups a week since he was very little and is fairly good about sharing, but nothings perfect. He still fights over toys when he really wants something. They're not brats, just kids. And don't worry about the ambarrassing tantrum, every mother at the park has been there before.

the good news is is that this is normal behavior for a two-year-old (ever hear of the terrible twos?). the bad news is, you have a long and trying few years before you. My daughter is the same age as your son and started this a few months ago. i was concerned too and so I read lots of articles and i talked with out doctor. According to what I found out, at about the age of two (though it can start before or after this age) a child starts to test their boundaries. It's your job as the parent to keep those boundaries sound. the older they get, the farther the boundary moves. It can be VERY trying! you did really good by pulling him out of the situation and sticking to your guns! as for the fit, that will grow to a shorter and shorter length of time unit it gets down to almost nothing. good luck, and what ever you decide to do, just stick to it! :)

Totally NORMAL for a 2 year old!!! :) Wait until he's 3! Less fits more outright defiance, then at four they get sassy . . . I haven't gotten to five yet, but whoever still thinks parenting look like a minivan commercial hasn't spent time at the park or the train table at Barnes & Nobel. Don't worry, someday soon it will be some other person's kid throwing the fit, and you'll just be smiling inside saying, THANK GOD IT'S NOT MINE this time!

Hugs!

I think your son is just going through some normal development processes. Our son went through the same when he was just over 2 years old. It took a month or two and he started to learn to share. He would even have issues sharing/taking turns with his best buddy. I think you are doing the right thing by removing him from the situation. Just know that it takes time and the only way he will learn is through repeated exposures to the situation. Do not worry about being judged, as in my opinion this is normal and most parents have experienced the same thing and can empathize. Good luck!

It is very likely normal behavior. The key is that you do remove them from the situation, let your child know it is in appropriate and try to encourage sharing. Learning to share is a learned thing and can take time but you need to be consistent in how you deal with it and the consequences that is appropriate for age. Early twos, it is removing them from the situation or letting them deal with it (find friends who will allow the kids to interact and figure it out.. is another option). As they get older and understand more you can set expectations and consequences and do reminders through a playdate.

H., Your child is definitely not a brat. This happens a lot at that age with kids, especially kids that have been at home with parents or grandparents. They havent learned how to share or any social skills. It is good that you are putting him in a school to help him learn those skills. It will not be an instant fix but if you pick the right school and tell the teachers about his habits then they will be able to help you break him of those habits and let you know what you need to do on your end to help them. Good luck to you. If you have not already chosen a school, I highly recommend Bright Horizons.

H.,
Your son is asserting his independence. I found that three was a much more difficult age to deal with than 2.
1. Give him warnings when you are leaving. 15 minutes, 10 minutes, 5 minutes, 2 minutes, down to one and inforce it.
2.Don't console a tantrum. It just gives him attention in a negitive way. Ignore him and he will realize no one is paying him any attention.
3.Don't let him get away with taking others toys. It is not nice and time out from play or another from of discipline will get the point across.
4. Do praise him when he shares. Teach him about your things as apposed to his things. You work to hard to let him trash everything.
5. Do love him and always before as well as after discipline make sure he knows this.
Know that if you don't do something now he will be a terror that your friends won't want to be around.
C. B