My mother left her parakeet with me for what we thought would be two weeks but is now turning into 3-4 months. The emergency she left the state for is now over, but she feels she needs to stay away longer.
My mother watches my kids any time I need a babysitter, so I feel I “owe” her to continue keeping her bird at my house for this total of 3-4 months. However, I can't stand it. I am very much a neat freak and every two days I am cleaning floating bird feathers, bird seed, and dried bird poop off the floors. It stays in its cage, but if it is near the bars of the cage when it relieves itself, the poop/pee/whatever falls on the floor and even leaves splash marks on the floor/wall/etc. My house and my vacuum now smell like bird, and I am going to steam the carpet where the cage used to stand before I discovered its pee was getting on the floor.
She has only had the bird for about a month. I could return it to the store where she bought it (with her permission, of course.) Am I being unreasonable by not wanting to keep it for 2-3 more months?
If it helps to know this…
She watches my kids any time I need a babysitter. She would do anything for me, though I seldom ask her for anything except babysitting, which she honestly loves to do.
I have been helping my mother clean up her messes since I was in elementary school and will continue to do so (long, irrelevant story). After she left town, I cleaned out her very dirty condo, finished moving her belongings, and cleaned up her new house so it would be nice when she returns. And that’s just the tip of the iceberg. Just saying all that so you don’t think I’m not willing to help her out as well.
So, should I suck it up and keep the bird, poop and all; or is 3-4 months a little excessive?
Bleck, I don't blame you, I hate birds. (well, not the ones who live OUTSIDE)
Sorry to be hatin' on the birds, but....
I would have to talk to her about that one.
:(
I think you're stuck taking care of it. I would go to the pet store and ask them for suggestions re. cutting down on the mess, or even google to see how others have dealt with the problem. Perhaps an alternate spot with a kiddy pool underneath the cage so you can line that with papers, and the mess goes on the pool? Good luck!
I've bailed my mom out of similar situations with alarming frequency. It gets old and is enabling to her when you don't take a stand. I would just tell her, "when can I drop the bird off, or would it be easier for you if we take it back to the pet store"?
Sorry but my vote is suck it up without a doubt. 3-4 months, to me, is not "excessive" ......
My Mom put up with me for 18 years. I would absolutely return the favor =-)
I say suck it up! Sorry =(
What if you left your child with her and had to go someplace and your trip lasted much longer than you thought? She wouldn't want to return your kids after they trashed her living room! (OK- bad example. I am being silly - sorta lol!)
You need to figure out a way to keep the splatter off of the walls and keep the area as clean as possible. A little more experimentation and you should have it down. (perhaps newspaper taped to the walls and floor that you change daily?) You have a few months to figure it out!
=)
Keep the bird.....
Nikki - Lighten up! I was KIDDING about the comparison!! (which is why I said I was being silly when I first posted this....)
Well, you have been cleaning up her messes for years and it doesn't sound like you are looking to stop doing so- so just keep the darn thing for another 2 months b/c you're going to do it anyway.
Having said that, next time she goes out of town- she needs to take the bird with her or returns it to the pet store.
Nope, I wouldn't keep the bird. Ask your mom if you can return it to the store or if she knows of anyone else who can keep the bird. My mom raised me, taught me, nurtured me, etc. I would NEVER watch her dog. I don't like dogs and I don't owe her that favor. And neither do you. I had birds, quite a few of them so I know your pain. They are very, very messy animals. If it were me, I'd put the bird outside, anywhere as long as I didn't have to clean up after it.
Could you talk to your mom about this? Something along the lines of, "Mom, you have always been so willing to help me and I do want to reciprocate, but I gotta be honest: I am really not a "bird" person. Do you know of anyone who might be willing to watch the bird for the rest of the time you are away? If you can't find anyone, that is fine of course." It would be great if there was a solution that met both your needs.
Just put a plastic floor protector or plastic bag, under the cage. So that the bird splats, don't go directly on your flooring.
Makes clean up easier that way.
Or, re-locate the cage and the bird.
Put it somewhere, where it will not splash onto the carpet or walls.
Like, maybe put it in the garage?
Or a Patio?
The thing is, a bird and its cage is portable. Therefore, you can move it, to somewhere else where it will not mess up your home/carpeting/walls.
Not everyone likes birds and its mess.
For the stains/smell, go to a Pet store and they have pet stain/odor remover sprays.
Be happy its not a dog or a cat. Consider what the bird means to your mother. If you can't "suck it up", then perhaps you could pay a bird sitter or someone who might enjoy the company of the "little cherper"!
Blessings....
Just ask her about it. You'll be able to tell pretty quickly whether you can take it back or not.
why don't you just put the bird back at her house - fill it's water and food so that it is SUPER full - or get a big feeder or whatever and then just go over there every couple days to refill the food and water etc......????
Just a thought.....
So when exactly is she coming back?
How much longer will you need to care for this bird? I would tell her, the truth, this is turning in to a bit of a chore, so you really would like to at least know the ending date. You have been caring for it 3 to 4 times longer than even she cared for it.
I would consider purchasing plastic for the floor around the cage or ask the pet store if there are larger trays to go under the cage that attaches. Then have your mother reimburse you for it.
excessive! birds & their noise & mess are annoying. I wonder if it could learn to escape & fly home to mama! LOL
Are you sure she will come back for it? The bird M. have bonded with your family in the last 3 months and would have a hard time adjusting to living with your mom again.
I say it's a bit excessive. Especially considering what she went for, is done and now it's just a vaca for her.
There are solutions to the bird mess, but it also depends on how much room you actually have too. I think the kiddie pool is a great idea, but plastic tarp (they have clear ones too) is cheap as well and covers more (i.e. walls along with flooring).
Another thing to think about... Has your mom taken this bird to the vet yet? Birds can have parasites that won't bother the bird but can make people sick. THAT's where I'd have the biggest issue.
While I've asked my mom to watch my kids, I've NEVER asked her to watch my pets. My ex mother in law LOVED (my animals were old and have passed) my pets... So, she'd stop in and make sure all was well, but never more than a week. And yes, because they were older, there were the occasional messes. I'd never have asked her to look after them if I didn't think that she loved them........ Lastly, I gave her money for watching my pets. That was incorporated into my 'vaca fund'.
I think watching the bird for free lifetime babysitting is a fair trade. If you have the funds there are better cages that keep the seed/poop in. I have a canary and there are maybe 15-20 little pieces of seed that made it out a day, no poop and only the occasional feather. I'm a neat freak too and the cage makes a huge difference in my enjoyment of him. It doesn't have a brand name on it but it has maybe 4 inches of clear plastic at the bottom before the bars start, I've seen it at multiple pet stores but I got mine at PetSmart. I wanna say 60 dollars or so for a good size one (I like my canary happy :) ). I'll bet there's a smaller version for cheaper.
Hi, Can you move the bird to the garage or another place in the house where its easier to clean up after? I would also have a heart to heart talk with her and tell her how you feel. Since she changed the original plan, she needs to make sure its ok with you too. Ask her if you can return the bird to the store----it sounds like she is not bonded with it because she left after just a few weeks of having it. Best wishes!
M
If you have had this bird for 2 weeks, she has had it for less than a month, and it's going to be another 2-3 months before she comes back, I can't imagine that she is too attached to it. I say take it back (I love birds outside, but not in the house!)
I think its time to talk to your mom and tell her how you are feeling. I am sure there are health/sanitary issues from having a bird in your house. I couldn't do it and would suggest she find someone else to care for the bird, or allow you to return it. Either way, it shouldn't be your responsibility. Having her care for your kids is something she enjoys and shouldn't have strings for you to care for her bird for so long.
I'd tell her the same things you just stated in this post. If you wanted a bird you would have bought one yourself. Ask her what you should do and let her know you are not willing to keep in your house anymore. Can you take it to her house and go over every 3 days or so to feed it and once a week to clean up after it?
Why not just bring the bird back to her house and go over there and feed it and clean the cage?
Do you have any friends or neighbors who like birds, and who could keep it until your mom comes back? We have a neighbor across the street who has several birds and loves them. I bet if we were stuck babysitting a parakeet, he would gladly take it in. It's just a thought... check around and see who you know who loves birds. Give them the bird with a bag of bird seed, and your problem is solved! If/when your mom comes back, she can pick the bird up. Birds aren't for everyone.
Glad you added that second part so I got a better picture. I think I'd discuss this with her and tell her it's getting to be a big problem. I'd ask, since she doesn't seem really bonded with this pet, if it would be OK to return it if the store will take it. If not, I'd try to move the bird to a place where you can control the damage and put stuff under and around it, like a dollar store vinyl tablecloth or something and try to get thru it as nicely as you can. Sounds like she's the kind of person whose standards are very relaxed, which of course explains why yours are not! Good luck!
The pet store is not going to take the bird back. So...no use entertaining that idea.
I've had birds for years. When I go out of town, I just have someone come over to check the food and water and give millet treats every day or every other day. I also kept the TV on so they could hear voices and have something to look at. Silly, I know, but my birds were used to having people around all the time.
The bird will go to sleep when it gets dark and wake up when it gets light. As long as the house isn't freezing, there is no need to cover it up each night.
I had water and food containers that would hold a couple of days worth of each in case someone couldn't go to check on the bird if they got sick or whatever, but they can do pretty fine as long as they are warm and have food and water. And, a little noise like the TV or the radio. My birds really loved music.
I actually like having a bird in the house, but it's not for everybody.
You'll still have to clean it's cage and vacuum around it, make sure it has food and water and pay some attention to it. If you'd rather it be at her house, that might be an option.
If you talk to her and she really doesn't want the bird, you can call vets in your area. They know who the animal lovers are and might be able to help you find another home.
The pet store is already trying to sell the birds they have. Plus, they can't take any chances on the bird being sick or exposing the other birds.
Best wishes. I'd take it if I was closer.
Excessive. It's time for mom to ;put on the big girl pants. If you've been cleaning her messes since you were a kid, then she's taking advantage of you. And you should stop allowing it.
Tell her to get back and take her bird or it's going on Craigslist or back to the store.
You can always find a babysitter. This has to stop. And my family had parakeets, so I really like them, but we were responsible about it.
Have you asked her when she is coming back for the bird? If you can't work out a reasonable timeframe for her to come back, I would find the bird the best possible alternative living situation. I suggest you communicate with your mom and press for a timeframe.
I do think you need to help her with this bird since she babysits for you, but after 3-4 months, you have a right to ask for a deadline.
Hm. This is a tough one.
If it's just a matter of the "neat freak" in you being driven insane, that's annoying as all get-out, but not a dealbreaker, imo.
However, you did not sign up to have this pet, your mother did. And part of being a pet owner is being responsible for one's pets, making sure they are cared for, and not leaving that burden for someone else to bear.
If you have kids with allergies or, especially, asthma or breathing problems, you may have an out: Bird dander and feces can cause or aggravate problems for people with susceptibility to lung problems. http://www.cureautoimmunity.org/can-pet-birds-cause-sever... If anyone in your family is susceptible to allergies/breathing problems, or has been exhibiting issues, I would not hesitate to let your mom know that you can no longer keep the bird, and give a "claim him or I'm going to find him a new family to love hm" by X date.
what a huge PITA! i think your mom is way out of line asking you to do this. if you enjoyed the bird it would be one thing, but under the circumstances i think you should talk to her and place a strict time limit on how much longer he'll be there.
the babysitting thing isn't really relevant. i don't think the two things have to be intertwined one bit.
khairete
S.
