Is This Tacky? - Tempe,AZ

Wow, I'm bothered by the replies suggesting giving gently used items is tacky! (especially when it's not the main gift). Or those stating "new baby, new gift". I guess we do live in the richest country in the world... but my, that sounds spoiled, pampered, and entitiled. I've never met a baby that cares if their stuff is new or used. We live in a country of so much excess... why not pass it on? Blankets especially- wash them, and they are good to go.

I used to live in a low-income apartment complex, and I was shocked by the number of parents there that refused to put their children in used clothes, but then didn't have enough money left to buy food or gas. Priorities. Maybe that's why we are a nation in trillions of dollars of debt.

I wouldn't be offended if I rec'd gently used baby blankets from a friend!

Another suggestion for "stuffing" would be diapers :)

Good friend? Barely used blankets? Absolutely! I think it's a great idea. However, like others have said - diapers would be a WONDERFUL thing to use to hold the books up...though they are far from cheap.

Good friend? Without giving away the gift, why not ask her if she would like your daughter's baby blankets? If she says yes, (I would because I'm thrifty and not freaky about that kind of thing) then tell her "I'll be using them to help with the presentation of your "REAL" baby gift ;) "

I'm just easy that way. I was never a "my baby must have new things" - and the books are new. If she's the same, I don't see an issue. If she's picky, she might not go for it. Then do something else.

Is she a good friend or a GOOD friend? I like the mom that said to ask her first, "would you like some of the blankets our daughter hardly used?"

Then roll them up and tie a pretty ribbon around them.

I also love the suggestion of the disposable diapers stacked as a platform or risers. Genius! I stealing that clever idea.

I think it's sweet and I would personally love it. Overall it depends on the personality of your friend. There are some of my friends who would think that is sweet and some others not so much.

You know her better then all of us and your husband.

I don't know if it's tacky. But I would love it. What a lovely thought, my babies snuggled up in blankets that have been loved by your babies.

:)

What? I think it's a GREAT idea!! I loved it when my girlfriend went to our nearest Goodwill and got me a TON of baby books for my daughter's first birthday. Books are $1 a piece there and she got me about 20 books. We still have them all.
I think it's great when people regift or handme down. But you know your friend best. Would she be ok with getting gently used things?
L.

Depends on the friend! A girl at work (I know her, but we're not close) just had her 1st (a girl) and I asked how she felt about hand-me-downs. She said "I'd appreciate anything!" So, for her baby shower I got her a pack of diapers and a huge (pretty) gift bag filled with my daughter's clothes, blankets, etc! She was so excited and thanked me profusely!

I am also the type of person who has no problems with accepting hand-me-downs! In fact, in preparation for dd#2, I've accepted second hand gifts of clothes, blankets, bouncy chair, and even a breast pump (from a close friend)! I'm also refinishing a glider/rocking chair and dresser for the nursery.

So, depends on the friend and how you feel about it. I think it's a great idea!

Of course it's not tacky. Regifting perfectly usable things like that, provided that they are clean, is a more responsible way to go about the world anyhow. People keep buying more and more because they want new, new, new, when the person to their left or right has one that they could use. It's a huge problem.

But outside of my reviewing on recycling and reusing, I still don't think it's tacky. Every birthday I come across, I try to find something in my house to give the person. For me, it's that or nothing because I can't afford to buy gifts - but I can always find something nice and like new to give away.

I think it's awesome you bought a bunch of books and I think your idea for storing and stuffing the box is great. It's not tacky at all. It's thoughtful, generous, and responsible.

I don't think it is tacky but I appreciate gifts from my friends and loved ones. I think the real question is what would your good friend think? Do you think she would offended or not? I have one friend who be mad because it wasn't new while another friend would be grateful regardless. Good luck.

I think it's fine. She's a good friend, right? If it was an acquaintance that you barely knew, I wouldn't do it, but as a good friend, you will laugh about trying to figure out what to stuff it with later on. And she'll appreciate having those blankets, too.
:)

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ETA: I do think, though, that it isn't necessary. You could just wrap the books and put them in the bin, with a bigger bow on the bin itself. It really isn't necessary to "stuff" the bin. And you could give her the blankets at a later time, assuming you actually do want to give them to her, and aren't doing it solely so you have 'stuffing'...

Before my oldest was born, I had no idea what being a mom meant. I remember asking my sister to come with my to register, because I really didn't know what I needed. And let's face, those lists of "suggested items" that you get when you register are full of things you and baby don't really need.

I remember feeling a lot of pressure not to screw up. Of course now I look back and can see that all baby really needs is diapers, a few onesies and a place to sleep - maybe bottles and formula. That's about it, but we are so easily convinced that there is a "right" way to do things.

I would like to think that I had enough life experience to realize that my baby didn't need fancy, matching blankets or brand new blankets and that your barely used blankets would make a very nice gift. But I'm not sure I was that aware yet.

I think you need to consider how your friend would view it. Or, mention to her ahead of time that you are including some gently used blankets with your gift, but that's just part of the presentation and that you hope she enjoys the true present.

It's a tough one ... not sure there is a right answer.

No not tacky at all. Unless they have poop or vomit on them LOL

I have done the same thing. I have so many handmade baby blankets from when mine were babies. Most of them were never used- just put in the closet and forgotten. She's not going to know the difference, so give them to her at the shower. Not weird at all.

I'd do it, as long as you make is clear that they've been gently used.

nope. not tacky...as long as they aren't stained and GENTLY used...

have you thought about buying a package of diapers and using those instead?

When my daughter came into my life 27 years ago...hand me downs were VERY MUCH appreciated...

With my oldest son? He LOVES hand-me downs...he really "hates" breaking in new jeans or shorts...so that saves me a ton of money...

I think it's a great idea....heck you can even put bottles and pacifiers or even chew toys in there....onesies....socks....baby needs - like shampoo, etc. it's great to get creative!!

I think it's a great idea. I would not have been offended to get used baby gear as long as it was in decent condition.

I think as long as the blankets are in pretty good shape, it's a great idea.

Tacky especially for a baby shower gift. I do think new babies especially those your going to a shower for deserve new items especially if the mom is a first time mom. Another idea is to get a couple small packs of diapers In larger sizes like 2 or 3 and put those in behind two rows of books and then get a couple backs of blankets to wrap around the diapers and do a little gift basket sort kf

I myself always appreciated hand me downs and I have no problem accepting them at all. However, my husband does not think that anything used, should be given as a gift (no matter how little it was used). Since this is a baby shower, where everyone will be bringing new gifts, perhaps this is not the time to give the blankets. I'm sure they will be an appreciated addition to the "new mom stash" but not necessarily at the baby shower. Just my thoughts.

I think its fine. I received so many blankets and practically none of them were used, so I'm sure they're either new or like new.

But... you could solve your dillemma by stuffing the basket with rolled-up diapers. You could tie them up with ribbons (or rubber bands) the way they do for a diaper cake. A small bag wouldn't be that much more $ and she'd certainly use them!

I kind of agree with your husband. While the thought is nice, I most likely wouldn't use them. I would use new blankets before using someone elses hand me downs. Hand me downs are nice if someone asks if I need or want them, but I would not give them as a gift.

If the blankets look good - if they aren't worn, torn, or stained - I'd say they're all right to use. Definitely let your friend know that the blankets are being recycled. Or (or and/or) you can add a new, small baby toy - a rattle or teething ring - to the books, bin, and blankets.

At our house using re-used items is standard procedure, but I can understand that other people might need to get used to the idea.

Not tacky. Not at all. :)

What kind of person is she? I have a cousin who got all new for her second child because she didn't even want to use what she had used for the first one. NO handmedowns there. For gifts, I usually go with new, especially if it's her first kid and it's at the baby shower. I'd use tissue paper myself, and gift the blankets at another time, but only you really know what she would prefer.

Is it necessary for them to stand? Can you wrap them and lay them in the bin?

I do not think it is tacky. Have someone else look at the blanket to judge the condition. Sometimes our baby's items that seems clean and wonderful do not look the same to outsiders. Plus you are using the blankets as a prop for the 'real gift.' I would have love to have extra pre-washed blankets.

I happen to love hand me downs. When my kids make a mark on the clothes I do not feel so bad since they were already wore a bit. Also, the plastic swigs and entertainment centers last a long time, so these are great to hand down.

I did receive some used newborn clothes from an in-law at my baby shower. It was very awkward because all the clothes were stained and the fabric was washed so much (maybe in bleach, not sure) that holes were forming. I was surprised to see newborn clothes in such poor condition. Babies grow out of them so fast I didn't think it was possible to be so ratty. I recall having to hold them items up during my baby shower for all to see.

You say this is a "good friend", how good of a friend is she? Why not ask her if she's okay with hand me downs? Tell her it's not the main gift.

I don't think it's tacky, but I do believe there are other things you can use instead.
Diapers.
Stand the books up in the bin and tie a ribbon around them to keep them from falling over.
Lay the books down or spread them out.

We live in Arizona. I know that with my first daughter we got a TON of blankets. We probably never used even half of them. For some reason people love to give blankets which considering how hot it is here 99% of the time, is silly and they just don't get used. I do not think it's tacky. Make up a cute poem about it so she knows they're not brand new. Let her know that if she doesn’t want them, that you won’t be offended if she donates them to a women’s shelter or something.
It's not the main gift. People need to get over themselves. My sister recently had a baby, her first, and most of the stuff she has is used. Hand me downs from me. Not that she couldn't afford brand new stuff but she sees how ridiculous it is to spend money on stuff that mostly only get used in the 1st year of life. I actually asked her about it at one point because I also don't want my niece growing up feeling like her life has been nothing but hand me downs. My sister's response was that if my niece ever said that, she'd remind her of all of the other children in the world who go without even the most basic of necessities.
The bottom line is, you know your friend best. If you think she’ll be offended then don’t but if you think she’ll be okay with it then I see no reason why not. I still have a ton of blankets that people made for me that I can’t part with and my kids are almost 7 and 3. Save the ones you love, pass on the ones who could get more use elsewhere.

i think it's fine. if she's hinky about new blankets she's only going to use packaged ones anyway, right? i agree you don't need to spend any more.
but i do know people who think anything used, however gently, is unacceptable. so i guess it depends on the mom involved.
i do like the idea to use little diaper packs to stuff around the books, but that's more money spent.
khairete
S.

I agree that's weird. But if it's a good friend, she may not care. I could just tell my BFF I needed to do it and she would laugh at me.
For for someone I didn't know as well, I might use something like diapers, instead.

Sorry. New blankets, or a box inside the bin to elevate the books.

Here's a tip. She's not going to use the bin to keep the books in. She'll use it for something else and put her books on a shelf of some sort. If I were you, I wouldn't spend any more money. But don't give her old blankets...

Seriously?! Your husband actually CARES what you're giving a friend for her baby shower? I'm just stuck on that part. My husband doesn't even know what "he" is getting his own mother for her birthday until she opens it in front of him. :)

Weird and I'd think it was not nice. New baby's get new things unless you go when it's not the baby shower and say "Hey, I have some stuff from when XXX was a baby. I brought it over, I don't need anything back".

If the bin is too big for a stack of books what is it's purpose? Why does she need a big bin?

I'd probably wrap the books and put the box in the bin then put a big bow on it for the whole effect.

not tacky, in fact, I think it's a great idea!

I think it's a great idea! I would probably mention or write in the card that these belonged to my little one, feel free to pass them along if you have more than you can use. I agree that it is environmentally responsible compared to tissue that will be thrown away!!