Issue I Walked into Today at Daycare.........

I would speak to the director and put a complaint in writing. That woman has no business working in the childcare business. She needs to be disciplined by the director and educated in the proper ways to approach children or be fired.

Yes, you need to speak with the director. The woman apologized to you probably in hopes that she could appease you without having you talk to the director, but it's definitely warranted in this case. People that don't have patience with kids simply should not be in the business of childcare.

Another vote to contact the director. Who does this woman think she is???? No patience for disrespect? But she can disrespectfully scream at a child?

I work at an elementary school and I've seen kids be disrespectful. It's amazing how you can change the course by simply talking to them about their behavior and redirecting them to do the right thing. I do this every day and I accomplish it without screaming. It's really not that hard to do.

My heart aches for this child... please, please contact the director! Good luck and keep us posted!

If there is a director or supervisor, I would go to that person and register your concerns. It's a day care worker's responsibility to have patience with all of the children. The fact that she excused herself and professed that she has no patience is an indication to me that her supervisor needs to take action.

I would not let this slide. She said she has no patience for disrespect. She, herself was disrespectful of the boy and all of the children who had to hear her. Her screaming is detrimental to all the children.

I used to work at a rollerskating rink and often we would have daycare groups come in to skate. One group only had one van so they would have to shuttle the kids in bunches. The last group was waiting, and the person in charge started screaming at the kids. They were understandably restless, and she had them standing, they wanted to sit ... that sorta thing.

She was probably just as tired and frustrated as the kids, but thats no excuse for the way she was yelling. After her group boarded the van, I called the center and asked to speak with the owner. I explained what I saw, and she agreed it was unacceptable and she said she would talk with that teacher.

If I were you, I would call the owner/director and tell them your concerns. You can even say your child was asking questions about why the teacher was yelling so much.

Its a tough situation. Good luck.

Is there someone who could watch your child until June?
My daughter and a bunch of kids were traumaticed by a screamer and the church denied there was a problem. My daughter THRIVED when I moved her.

well i would talk to the director also. i can't help but think of that story on the news (was it 20/20?) where they were uncovering all these criminals working in daycare. i didn't worry about it at the time because i have been using our daycare for a long time and KNOW for a fact that all the ladies there are great people with hearts of gold (honestly, even if they were ex-cons i would probably be okay with it, depending lol) but if i had seen something like this at his daycare i would have a huge issue with it. you don't "know" these people - you only know what you see. of the small amounts of time you spend there, what are the odds you'd run into that? does it happen often? once would be a huge red flag to me, but then think about if that's a weekly thing? is that ok?

i would definitely have a one-on-one with the owner/director. i'd have a problem.

This makes me ill.

A special needs child has a condition; verfiable, being TREATED for (obviously, since they're on meds) condition... and the daycare person is SCREAMING at them????

If they can't handle the child without screaming... the child needs to be ELSEWHERE.

PROTECTED FROM THIS DAYCARE.

This is abusive.

NO disorder is handled better by someone screaming at them.

Ugh.

Like CPS ugh.

Like "A special needs child was being screamed at by this person at this daycare. No, I don't know what kind of special needs, the daycare told me he was on medication and was a problem to justify their treatment of him, and if they're screaming at him in front of other parents I am highly concerned how they treat him when he is alone with them." phonecall to CPS tonight ugh.

Gross.

Let. Me. At. Them.

You do NOT SCREAM AT A SPECIAL NEEDS CHILD.

Physically ill.

I would personally bypass the director, because this daycare needs a MAJOR wakeup call in how one legally treats children, since their morals are soooooo far out of line, and their early childhood development training so COMPLETELY SUB PAR.

I would also call the director and complain about her bahaivor. Depending on how much time you have after you pick up your child and between the next thing you have to do... I would wait until the parent of that child came to pick them up and then I would also tell the parent. Im sure they are getting notes on the child behavoir or non listening... but I feel they need to know how thier child is being treating and how they are handling thier child! Im sure the center isn't telling them how they are "handling" it!

The only person allowed to scream at my kids is me. And even I do that in moderation and for severe offenses. I'm sure her screaming was scarier to the preschoolers than what the kid did. Totally unprofessional. I would put a complaint in writing and send it to the director.

Lets see, a kid is misbehaving, SO the caretaker displays some misbehaving (yelling)herself to solve the problem? NO.

I have found myself lose my cool a few times. I am not at all proud of it, nor do I make excuses for it, so I'm not saying I'm perfect, but I do know what is right... You do not yell at kids. It shows that you have lost control and it also shows them that it is what they should do when there is a problem.

And not that I would take better care of other kids than my own, but there is this invisible line that is completely impossible for me to cross when I am caring for other people's children. For one, you don't want to step on any parents toes, you want to make sure discipline coincides to what they are used to at home, AND you are getting paid to watch them.

Bottom line, the way she behaved is unacceptable, and to say the boy is on meds? WHAT difference does THAT make? Does that imply: "Oh, he's got problems, so it isn't like we need to treat him like a normal child" ? It p*sses me off just writing that!

EVEN if the boy did something completely terrible, yelling at him won't solve a darn thing, and to top it all off, he wasn't the only child experiencing this yelling.

ALSO, if she was so comfortable acting like that when a parent is around... Geesh, what does she do when she isn't being watched? I'm sorry, but this makes me very uneasy.

I wonder if that poor kid's parents know he gets screamed at like that?

I witmessed the same thing when my son was in daycare as a baby. I spoke privately to the director about my concerns. That care provider needs a refresher on how to handle a stubborn pre-school child.

I don't think it's possible to protect your son from ever hearing screaming or being yelled at (is he going to play sports when he gets older?) but I do not think this was appropriate in any way, shape, or form.

Do you have another option until June? I would definitely speak to the owner or director because this is beyond unacceptable. The parents of this boy who was yelled at sent their son somewhere they thought he would be safe, and while he may not be in physical danger, he is not being protected there.

I'm sorry you had to go through this - there is nothing worse than our babies being somewhere where we don't feel like their best interest is being taken into account. And I can only imagine how scared a little 2 year old was to hear yelling like you described :(.

I wouldn't have left the daycare until that boys parent(s) came to pick him up. I would let them know what I witnessed and that I wanted to make sure they were aware. I would then call cps and report what happenned. I also wouldn't take my child back there. The other "teachers" sitting idley by while this happenned makes me think it is an everyday occurrence that all who work there are comfortable with. Unforgiveable!

This makes me feel sick for that poor child. I can't imagine. If I were that boy's mother I would be sick, hurt, and out raged. She has obviously been through a lot with this boy to have him put on medication. If I were the mother I would want to know and would appreciate another mother bringing it to the directors attention.

No child should be yelled at like that regardless of whether they try your patience or not. Don't get my wrong, I can't say I've never lost my cool with my son. We are human, but it's a whole different ball game where your supposed to be acting like a professional. I nanny part time and I recognize I am getting paid to give those children a certain level of care that their mother expects.

This is just so sad. I think you should put this to the director not only verbally, but in writing. There should be a paper trail that this complaint was made. That poor boy. Good for you for caring!!!

I agree to tell the owner/director. Tell him/her that you went home and it was still unsettling to you. You don't know what the boy did, but if the screaming was rattling to you, you can only imagine the effect on the other children. Further, I don't think that her screaming is all that helpful for discipline. I would ask WHAT behavior could possibly warrant that response.

If she has no patience, then that's one problem. If she cannot get the respect of her charges, that's another problem. That she feels that she must address this child in this manner (under the guise of protecting her preschoolers? Huh?) is a third problem. I would be SOOO happy to get my son out of there.

If the child has problems and the medication is not working, then perhaps he needs another school that can handle his needs. But that doesn't absolve the teacher's response.

No childcare provider should ever yell or scream at a toddler/preschooler.(*any child) They are in a position of power and I am sure that was extremely scary for that child and the other children who had to witness that. I would make a formal, written complaint to the director, and find somewhere else for your child to be until June. I wouldn't be able to go back knowing what you told us....GL

I am assuming/hoping that this woman is not the owner or in charge. I would talk with the director and let her know of your concerns. If a teacher has reached her patience breaking point she needs to be removed from the situation for a while and given the time to regroup. It is not OK for her to loose her cool in the classroom!

M

I would call the daycare director and tell her what you witnessed.

Ok, I'm on board with everyone else about not screaming at a child . . . but (and I might get slammed for this) you stated that you had no idea what the boy had done.

Let's all take a step back and think about what he COULD have done: thrown a toy at another child, pushed another child down "just because", tripped a child, spit on another child, spit on the teacher . . . As an educator who worked as an assistant in a preschool, I've witnessed ALL of these things (and more) first hand from an unruly 4 year old with behavior issues!! Did I care that he was on meds for his behavior? No, because that's not the issue. The issue was his behavior. Did I scream at this child? No. Did I raise my voice louder than I normally do? Absolutely!! He endangered the other children and me in the class!

Just posing an honest question: What if that boy hurt your son? Whose side would you be on then?

So my advice to you is to consider what you "didn't see". Was she right to scream, "and I mean screaming at the top of her lungs at this older boy"? NO. But just be careful how you approach the situation.