Kindergarten or Back to Preschool?

I had this question with my son- boys are slower then girls anyway but the school my son was going to recommended we wait- I was really upset but after talking to his preschool teacher who agreed we decided to wait. it was the best decision we ever made. even though I thought he was ready the growing in that one year and going to junior 5 preschool was the best. so- I would ask her preschool teacher- she should know if she is ready or not

My son turned 5 on July 26 the year he started Kindergarten, he just graduated high school On June 8th. He never had any problems. The one thing is he was always the youngest in his class. The big thing for him was he was one of the last to take drivers ed. Being one of the older students has it's advantages. Being a little more mature, getting drivers licenses earlier and the more she knows when she goes into Kindergarten the better off she will be. Kindergarten is not just fun a games any more it is almost a grade school prep, depending on if you are attending public school or private school, to how much they learn. My son went to Christian School they were reading in Kindergarten and doing curse by the end of 1st grade.

I would not be afraid to keep her back, but it really up to you and your husband.

S.

My daughter is one the younger kids in her preschool class. She will be in the 4 year old class next fall. She is already spelling and loves learning new words, counting, etc. She also loves to play!

What I've noticed, is that she does really well listening to her teachers and thrives on the challenge. When she is at home she is less focused, and wants to play more - which of course she should and is natural.

Did your daughter's preschool teacher bring up any concerns? Did she have trouble focusing in preschool? If not, I'd let her move on to kindergarden.

I think you need to talk to her preschool teacher and discuss your daughter's Kindergarten readiness. Your perception that she only wants to play may not be how she is in class. If see this playing behavior in your daughter when you volunteer in her class, it might be because you are there. I know my kids act differently when I'm in their classrooms.

Just so you know, the first 6 months of Kindergarten are an adjustment for everyone. If her preschool teacher thinks she's ready, she is and will do well (after an adjustment period).

Good luck!

One thing to consider is she is a girl and they handle it better. I had the same thoughts will my son who has a summer birthday. He didn't even have a grasp on all the letters and numbers. His preschool teacher suggested we try kindergarten and then just let him repeat it if it didn't work out.
Well, He just completed Kindergarten. He faired well and has grown a lot. He still seems to be below what his sister was like at the same level, but his teacher assures me that all this evens out in the 3rd grade.

I also would speak to the preschool teacher and see how your daughter behaves during story time and circle time. I know most of preschool in unstructured learning and learning through experience, but those times during the day when she needs to just sit and listen, how does she respond? I had this feeling about my son...he's only three now. But I told my husband that I thought he would have a hard time because, seriously, he never sits still or stays quiet. However, right before we moved (2 months ago) he and I stayed at school for my daughter's last day of preschool. They were going to have a going away party. Anyhow, he sat in! He sat quietly, listened to the story, participated intheir song and dance circle time--he was an entirely different child in a school setting. Sure it was only one day, but as another mother said, your daughter probably acts differently in school than at home. If she really has a hard time by your preschool teacher's standards, then keep her back. Otherwise, rest assured that there are other kids with August birthdays, so she won't be the youngest and even if she is, she sounds like a very smart girl, so she will probably fit in and be as productive as the rest of the class. Good luck. =0)

Just a story, take it as you would like. My sons bday is Sept. 2nd....3:01 am. He missed the deadline for school by 3 hours and 2 minutes. He is the youngest in his class. But the August bdays in his class are 15 in number. He wanted to play all the time too....more like explore. He wanted to know everything about everything. Because of his bday, I had a quam about sending him. But he did go. I had to appeal to the board because of the age but it all turned out good. He is going to be in 3rd grade. Physically speaking he is taller than some order than he is. He always had the height factor and that played in my decision to send him to kindergarten when he was 5. Physicality and mental ability play a role in it as well. Kindergarten is a place where they "get used" to school business. Structured environment etc. I don't know if your kindergarten is half day or whole day. This too should play a factor in your decision.
Good luck!

I think it depends on whether it's a full-day or half-day program and obviously depends on the child, too. Talk to the preschool teachers and see what they think. You might check with the school (if they have someone in the office who is sympathetic) to find out what trends are like in your school district and if there are a lot of older kids starting.

I wouldn't worry too much about being the oldest or the youngest either way - someone is always the oldest or youngest. Girls are typically more mature, but there are advantages to being older in your peer group. Especially if it's a full-day program, I'd give holding back some serious thought. Kindergarten now is more like the first grade we remember.

But no matter what you decide, just relax and know that you've made the best decision with the information you have. People will give you lots of opinions, but all you can do is try to do what is best for her, and I admire that you are stopping and thinking about it. I'm sure either way will work out well for her!

Hi,
I'm a preschool teacher (14 years now) and have advised parents on this issue many times. What did her teachers say about her progress and maturity? Did they comment on her attention span during activities and her social/emotional maturity?

School readiness involves so much more than letter/sound recognition. I disagree with what another person posted that kindergarten is basically unstructured .. I can't remember the exact words but something along the lines that the kids get a lot of free time or something like that. I can tell you that is not true. My son attended full day kindergarten and in the afternoon there was some time allowed for stations where they kids could go and do some unstructured exploring but basically now a days, kindergarten is VERY structured and the children are doing what we used to do in the 1st grade..

basic math and a lot of reading/phonics activities. There is a lot of seated/worksheet type of activities and working in groups with other children.

I'm not sure what type of preschool you sent her to, hopefully she did have a lot of free time to play and make discoveries which is very appropriate for her age. Many preschools though at the 4'5 year old level also include much more kindergarten readiness skill building too as a result of this pushing down of the 1st grade curriculum. Early childhood educators don't feel its appropriate but we do our best to provide the best of both worlds so to speak- provide ample time for learning and making discoveries through play and group activities and lots of fun pre-literacy,pre-k skill building.

If you should decide to give her another year, there are many preschools that offer a 5 day pre-k sort of class where she will have the opportunity to have another year to mature (if this is an issue) and work on pre-k skills.. (which no one has ever regretted holding back their child, especially younger children.. myself included with our own daughter and son.. the best decision we ever made) the kids in her kindergarten class will NOT care that she is a year older and they won't even know until they all are older anyway. Actually for my son, his friends have always looked upon him as a leader and very mature.

It has not be an issue with my kids..or any of the parents I have advised over the years.. (My two that we held back are 18 and 22 now and have done great in school)

What she could possibly struggle with is if she is immature and unable to focus for a reasonable amount of time.. (she should be able to focus long enough to do a simple worksheet..print her name even if it isn't that legible..)

listen at circle time 10-15 minutes long for example, take care of her personal belongings, share with other children, these are typical readiness skills..) hopefully she has experienced a structured circle time at school and had exposure to these types of activities..)
hope my comments help in some way..

good luck with your decision. Feel free to email me if you have other questions..

K. I had a Nov.son and Oct. daughter (now 31 & 31). I remember reading that girls should be 5 by August and boys six months earlier. My son was reading and doing math at 4 (very bright), but not mature enough for school. Both were held back (the cut off used to be December then) and I never regretted giving them the extra year to mature. Both did well in school and now as young adults have successful lives. Conversely my neighbor and my sister-in-law both sent their sons the year earlier and both ended up with problems throughout their school lives and as adults.

It never hurts a child to be held back and if your gut instinct tells you to do so - listen to it.

You are going to have to make that determination. My son's birthday is August 22. When we took him for the Kindergarten testing, the teachers advised of waiting another year, they thought he might need a little "maturing time". It was actually the best thing for him. He's going to be thirteen soon and entering the 7th grade. He gets nothing but A's and B's on his report cards. He's also a great help to the teachers and is often requested when their class reads to the "younger" grades.

There are plenty of kids whose birthdays are at the same time of my son's (August), some were mature and patient enough, while others were not. Unfortunately, the ones that were not are not getting good grades because they're now struggling. With talking with their parents, because we are friends, homework after school is frustrating for their kids and for them. If you really feel she needs to wait another year, wait. It's only a year and a parent always wants their children to have a successful educational career.

I say send her if she's that excited to go! The teacher will tell you if she has problems, and there's always an adjustment period. She may just adjust and start to grow and mature before your eyes! You'll never know if she can fly if you don't push her out of the nest, and it sounds like she's poised and ready to jump! Good luck, and enjoy every minute!

My son's birthday is August 4th and we went throught the same thing. He really wanted to go to school and we felt he was ready. He did not attend pre-school, but did know letters, numbers, etc. He did struggle a little at first, but now he is going into fifth grade gets great grades and is doing fine. If she seems ready, scholastic/maturity and such send her. If you have doubts don't, she won't know the difference. You and your husband make the call that you think would work best for her and I am sure it will be the right one!

Send her...in most cases, kindergarten is very hands on. A lot of what they learn is by playing. When my kids were kindergartners-they opened a diner in the spring. They wrote the menus, measured ingredients, added up your bill, there were cooks, servers, cashiers and bussers. Of course they had help with every step-but that was one way they learned throughout the year. Kids start school at different ages & abilities - they all get to the same place in the end.

My birthday is Aug 23rd and my brother's is the 31st. We both went to kindergarten at five. I worked in a school system for years as well as many of my relatives. Not until recently have I ever heard of concern as to whether to start a youngster in kindergarten on time or not. This baffles me.

Why worry until you see a problem. Kindergarten is play time most of the time anyway. There is some structure to get them ready for 1st grade, but most of the time is structured play. I don't understand this new trend to hold children back.

My opinion it is more a mommy thing than a child development thing. A fad if you will. If there was a big problem with children starting school at that age, then the age requirments would be different.

I wouldn't fret until you see a problem. Don't make an issue before there is one.

Let her start on time. No one wants the stigma of being the dummy that was held back....I had a friend that had that problem.