Kindergarten Requirements and When to Start

Updated on April 03, 2010
G.K. asks from Sandy, UT
35 answers

My husband told me that he read something that said June-August babies have a harder time or are at a disadvantage in Kindergarten since they just turned 5 and pretty much start school right away. What are your thoughts on this? My son will turn 5 this July and is supposed to start school in August or September. I am a little panicked that maybe I should wait and start him next year. Has anyone waited till the next year to start their child in Kindergarten? What has been the outcome of starting them at 5 or waiting till they are 6?
One of the reasons I am worried is that he is small for his age everyone thinks he is 3 because of his size but he is almost 5.
Which leads to my next question when will he hit a growth spurt or is he doomed to be a small guy forever? It seems like all his friends are growing but he is staying the same size. My 2 year old daughter is only 4-5 inches smaller than him.

Any advise on these two subjects would be greatly appreciated.

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M.S.

answers from Denver on

As an elementary teacher I would say WAIT to start him. I have never heard of parents regretting their decision to hold back their child...especially since he is small. Good Luck!

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T.F.

answers from Salt Lake City on

I always have my boys start the next year because its better to be older and they have a lot of self-esteem.

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M.R.

answers from Provo on

its such an individual case. If you feel he is emotionally, socially, and academically ready to learn, go ahead send him. If not reconsider. I had a late b-day in June and I went at 5, loved school, and did very well the whole way through. I am also a very small person. :). It really depends on the kid. You really need to also think about things like high school, making this decision now will definatly affect that time. good luck

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M.B.

answers from Pueblo on

I think it all depends on the child and their maturity. My son, now in 4th grade, is a May baby, but has always been immature for his age. I started him when he was 5, thinking I should wait another year, and I wish I had. He struggled with school because of his maturity. I finally held him back in 1st grade, against the advice of school administration, and he has done super! He has more confidence and isn't always the slowest one in class anymore. He is very bright, just didn't know it till he grew up some. He is now a leader in his class and does well. I recommend waiting if you have any concerns at all about maturity or size. It only gives them an edge they need to feel successful. good luck!

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S.

answers from Denver on

Has your son been in pre-school? How is he socially?

My son is an August baby. I was nervous to start him at 5, but he was fine socially, I kept in touch with his teacher constantly, he was not moving on to first grade unless he was READY to move on. He is now in 4th grade and does great, he is on grade level or higher in all subjects.

Now on the flip side, I work in the kindergarten room at our school and see kids who are July babies that really struggle with the work and socially. If a child is not ready they may struggle all through school.

I was an October baby and was able to start when i was 4 because of the cut of date. I finished high school but I struggled all the way through.

If you decide to put him in, make sure you keep a close eye on him. If he is struggling, I feel kinder is the best grade to hold them back in. They are so young they dont really understand.

Most schools will test each kid to see if they are ready and what needs to be worked on. Each child is different, its hard to tell!

Do you work with him at home? Start with getting him to know his ABC (not just saying them but also letter recognition), do flash cards with him but not in ABC order, work with numbers, recognition and counting. Writing his name, first and last. And of course, read to him all the time.

Hope this helps!

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J.W.

answers from Great Falls on

I am a teacher, I've taught middle school and also pre-k through 8th PE. I also have a son who will be 6 in May and starting Kindergarten this fall. I know for a fact that the boys in middle school who are younger (started K when barely 5) definitly stand out academically and socially. Even if they seem ready at age 5, I think the age difference really is apparent by the time they hit middle school. I believe this is mostly true for almost ALL boys. They mature slower than girls and need extra time to NOT be in a structured school environment. I feel that the rule in our country should change so that all boys can't start K until close to age 6. It would prevent a lot of problems later in their schooling career.
Just my opinion.

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M.E.

answers from Denver on

I was an October baby and started Kinder when I was 4 and had no problems at all throughout school. I am now a first grade teacher and can tell you that you would never know which kids in the class are the youngest or oldest. Some of my oldest kids are the smallest and some of the youngest are the smartest.

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M.F.

answers from Pueblo on

Hi
Why don't you ask your son what HE wants to do? Is he excited about starting school, or would he rather stay with you? Kids are very much in tune with themselves, so I would trust him to make his own decision. And, about his height issue - the universe makes everyone unique. If he was supposed to be taller, he would be. Being different from the others will teach him to get stronger in himself. It is better to be focused on what makes him a uniqe individual, than to try to make him "fit in."
In my son's class, one of the boys are very small. He was born way early and has never really caught up. However, this kid is amazing at basket ball of all things. He sneaks in between the others and just slides the ball into the basket, and for this reason alone, he is very popular! So, just trust your son's intelligence. Maybe he isn't supposed to fit in...And he is in no way "doomed" to be anything. Just wait and see...

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J.N.

answers from Salt Lake City on

First topic - it doesn't necessarily have to do with when they turned 5. When I taught kindergarten, there were some kids who had just turned 5 who were very ready, emotionally, socially, and academically. And kids who turned 6 a few months in who were far less ready. Of course, it can go the other way too. As a mom, my daughter (whose b-day is in September and had to wait) did better being the oldest, where my son (a June b-day) is doing fine as one of the youngest. And my son's cousin, who has an Aug b-day (a year older) did wait, so they're in the same grade. There's been no issues for either one of them. So take a look at your son's development. Does he work well with others, follow directions, and stay focused on a task for a few minutes at a time? Is he okay with trying new things? If not, it might be better to give him a year (and have him do preschool for the year). But if he's been in preschool or in other ways appears ready, it won't hurt him at all to be the youngest.

Now, for the height. How tall are you and your husband? A lot of it is genetic. I'm a shorty - 5'0" - and even though my husband is tall, one of our boys is clearly taking after me. He's only a couple inches taller than his little brother - I even had one person ask if they were twins! (they're 6 and 9). Our other 2 seem to be following their dad a bit more. So you can get a mix. Your son may end up being a shorty, but that's no tragedy! Yes, its a bit harder in some ways, but definitely something to work with (my bro made it all the way to 5'6" lol, he does just fine).
A better way to judge his growth is by looking at growth charts. If he's stayed within his percentile all along, he's growing just fine (my son has been right around 20th percentile since he was 1) and there's no need to wory. Some kids do have growth spurts and catch up. Others don't necessarily. Again, it's really no big deal, unless you make it one (and I would say don't.)

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K.M.

answers from Fort Collins on

My husband (with a July birthday, though who knows if that was the culprit, really) apparently had some trouble in Kindergarten and my mother-in-law decided that it would be best if he was held back and went through K again. That worked out very well and he ended up being in the top of his class throughout school (and he never got any flack from his peers; they probably didn't even remember or know or care that he was held back). You will know what's best for your son. If, by chance, your first decision doesn't seem to work out, don't fret. ;)

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R.C.

answers from Provo on

It depends on where he is at cognitively and socially. I was an October baby and my parents skipped me ahead a grade. Intellectually I was more than fine but socially I was a little behind. One of my sisters was August and conversely, my parents ended up starting her a year later. It worked out fine. So it really all is up to where your son is at developmentally.

As far as his size goes, I wouldn't see it as "doomed." He may or may not be small later, growth spurts do happen late, but if you act like it's a negative thing he will too, and his self esteem will be lower for it. One of my brothers is 5'8 with his shoes on and he's very popular, well adjusted, and liked by girls. It has to be nice for guys to be short enough that they're not always hitting their heads on low hanging light fixtures (like my husband does!).

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J.N.

answers from Denver on

Is your son in pre-school this year? If so, and he's doing okay socially, I say go ahead and continue with Kindergarten. My daughter turned 5 and started the very next day and is doing great! If you're in a decent shool, your teachers will asses his needs and worst case, you can withdraw him or have him repeat Kindergarten if he hasn't caught up. I also think ahead 13 years..... Do you really want your son to turn 18 before he even starts his senior year of high school? I've had friends with older kids who have pulled the "I'm legally an adult now, you can't tell me what to do" trick and have moved out their house and/or dropped out of school. Obviously, lots of kids turn 18 in highschool, so I'm not saying that will happen, but it's out there! I think the important thing at this age is making sure he feels secure and enjoys school. My experience so far with my daughters Kindergarten class is that the kids aren't really into teasing or bullying yet. They have their little BFF's but still all play together without the drama that tends to develop later.

I can't comment on the growth spurt thing, not having experienced that myself. There are lots of potential issues there. I'd check with your pediatritian to make sure he's on track.

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A.C.

answers from Colorado Springs on

We have a Nov baby so starting him at nearly 6 was a given. He's one of the 2 smartest kids in his class, & gets along well socially w/his peers. I was sent to Reading Readiness because my kindergarten teacher felt I was too shy to do well in 1st grade at that point. I was more at home with my "new" trade level than I would have been w/the older kids. There are apparently a lot of people who hold their kids back to give them an advantage in sports too. Make an appt w/his future teacher, tell him/her your concerns & see what they think. You could always wait the extra year & put him in preK for the socialization & basic skills if you'd like him to still be learning.
As for the size... the neighbor kid is 5'10" at age 11 & his best friend is maybe 5'3" at the same age... who knows...

A.G.

answers from Dallas on

The kindergarten question is a difficult one. I know many parents choose to wait, particularly with late summer birthdays. Think about maturity as well as skills. Perhaps talk to the school district and see what they suggest. I know some mom's here will have good advice.

As for size, different kids spurt at different times. A lot of it will be determined by genetics. I'm 4'11" and very small. My husband is 6'2". We've been very curious to see where our boys will end up on the growth charts. So far they've seemed to lean toward my family (everyone is small), much to my 12 year old's dismay. Both boys are small for their ages. They are both confident, and don't let it bother them too much. My 6 year old doesn't realize he's small, and my 12 year old tells me he wishes he was taller, but he doesn't let it get him down.

The 6 year old is still in size 3 or 4 pants and 6 shirts. The 12 year old is in size 8 pants. They are small boys. My brother is small, too, and he is a very successful happy man, so they have a great role model to look up to! My husband is a great role model, but he is a large man.

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A.J.

answers from Salt Lake City on

My boys are oly 3 and 2 however my mom is a school teacher and has had 8 kids herself. There are a couple summer birthdays in our family. She kept back the boys but put the girls in. Besides size, and all the academics it has helped them later on in high school not being the very last to date, drive, and helps in sports. Academically he probably could but socially he might be off better waiting a year especially if he is small.
Just a thought.

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M.R.

answers from Fort Collins on

Every parent knows their own child the best. My son's birthday is August 17th and he is an only child. I started him in school at 5 and he has done just fine, however I did have him in pre-school starting at the age of 3 1/2. You know your son. If you feel he is emotionally and mentally ready, then don't hold him back.

Don't worry about his size...children come in all shapes and sizes, and they all grow at different times. My son was very small, then grew almost 4 inches the summer he was 7. Your pediatrician will tell you if there is anything to be concerned about.

I pray all the best for you and your family.

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A.R.

answers from Boise on

My son turns 5 in June and I would NEVER think about keeping him out. Many, many, many summer birthday kids do just fine and those few examples stick in the minds of parents and school officials. They never blame immaturity and social issues on the November kids on their age - its a personality thing with them. For the summer kids, must be their age. I was born three days before the cut off, socially and academically I was near the top of my class and have a PhD. Most of my friends were also summer birthday kids and we all did just fine!!

Don't worry so much what other kids have done and focus more on what you think your son is ready for - My son has been in preschool for a while and has the skills to start school, so we made the decision for him to start. If he wasn't ready, we would have waited.

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P.D.

answers from Missoula on

It all depends on your son. I struggled with this too. Our son was born the end of July. I was torn because he would be one of the younger ones and because I've heard boys develop socially slower than girls. Also kindergarten is all day here and I wasn't sure he was ready for that. I talked to tons of people and finally called the school. The teacher we picked to be his kindergarten teacher said bring him on in! She talked with him and played with him for a while and told me to start him. He was very ready. He is in 1st grade this year and near the top of his class. I think he would have been very bored if we had waited until this year to put him in kindergarten. The point of this is that gather all in the information you can, try to talk to the person that would be his teacher and go from there. And remember, as parents it seems we make the wrong choices a lot, but kids are tough and will get through it. Good luck!

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G.L.

answers from Salt Lake City on

I've noticed that many responders feel that keeping summer babies, especially boys, from entering kindergarten until they are nearly six is a good idea for developmental reasons. I do think that it is worth careful consideration, but I put my July boy in kindergarten right after he turned 5, and I'm so glad I did. I think it very much depends on the individual child's readiness. For what it's worth, here's our experience.

My son was adamant about going to K, even though some of his friends were not going yet. But since he also still needed afternoon naps sometimes at that point, we chose to send him to a morning half day K at a district public charter school. The school where we go, the Open Classroom, requires that parents co-op in the classroom 3 hours /week. He has had a spectacular year. He started K reading ready but not yet reading, and still working on a few of his speech sounds. He was very reserved around people he did not know well. He now reads, has his speech sounds, and enjoys being with the kids in his class. The same child who would not speak in front of people even after 2 years of preschool now shares willingly in circle in front of his entire class. So much growth!

I think the academic growth would have happened anyway. But the social growth we owe in part to a well-run K.

One consideration you have that I did not - my son, one of the youngest kids in his class, is also one of the largest. People are often surprised to learn how young he really is.

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L.M.

answers from Colorado Springs on

My youngest son was an August birthday and I had planned to go ahead and start him in Kindergarten that month. However, the school he attended discouraged you from enrolling kids with a summer birthday until they were 6 and
required you to meet with the principal and teacher if you wanted to go ahead and start a child with a summer birthday. After meeting with them, I chose to wait a year and am so glad I did! They felt he was academically ready, but emphasized that being so young, he will be a follower and not just in kindergarten but all the way through school. He was much more sure of himself starting school later. I think boys - and especially if he is small for his age- will be better off waiting. As far as his growth- is his pediatrician concerned about his growth - does he plot out normally on a growth chart?
-LM

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K.H.

answers from Denver on

I used to be a teacher, now I am a stay at home mom. I feel very strongly that it really depends on the kiddo and whether or not he would be ready for KG. Some boys are really immature at that age, and struggle with learning in a structured environment. Some boys are ready to go even though they are on the younger side! Does he go to preschool? If so, I think the teacher would have great insight on how he would do next year. I think parents know their kids the best, and just by you being concerned over this issue, you obviously want what is best for him! Trust your gut! Good luck!

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A.G.

answers from Provo on

My brothers had birthday's right before the cut-off date...my mom kept them in preschool an extra year...then started them in kindergarten...She's never wished otherwise...they have all done exceptionally well...and it has been beneficial for them to be at the older end. I do think it's a decision to be made on an individual basis...and I think it makes a difference where you live. Where we used to live...Kindergarten was extremely academically intense...a lot of sitting...short recesses...p.e. once every other week...etc. Where we live now, where my daughter is in Kindergarten...they change activities a lot...and it's not so academically intense. My brothers were both very physical...Preschool was more developmentally appropriate for them. One of them is now majoring in Electrical Engineering, minoring in Chinese at a major University, socially, mentally, and emotionally doing extremely well...same with the other, who will enter College next year.

As far as the physical development...I wouldn't worry...kids grow at their own rate...if he is eating well-balanced and his doctor isn't worried...I wouldn't. Of course, if you have concerns or noticed eating problems...I wouldn't hesitate asking the doctor.

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L.B.

answers from Seattle on

My children both have summer birthdays and I started them in kindergarten right after they turned five. My son's birthday is late June and my daughter's is late August (she barely makes the cut off). My daughter is in 4th grade and in the top of her class. My son is in 2nd grade and is on the upper middle end. I am glad I didn't hold them back.

Talk to your child's preschool teacher to get their opinion. They see how your son does in a school setting.

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H.M.

answers from Denver on

You know your child the best, so you need to make the decision you feel is best for him. My daughter has a Sept. 16th birthday and the year she was going to Kindergarten, she missed the cut-off by 2.5 hours essentially - a day. (They later changed the date.) Anyway, we open enrolled her in another district because I knew she was ready and would get bored. She has two older brothers as well. She's still the smallest in her class, but she probably always will be - her parents aren't tall! And she loves school and learning and has excelled. I do know a family who had their son repeat Kindergarten as well, which they had to request testing and push it, but it worked out great for them. Good luck!! And remember, you know him best.

M.H.

answers from Raleigh on

My son is an August baby so I feel your pain! His teacher tells us that she believes he will be ready for Kindergarten at the age of 5, but then we would be the youngest in his class! My husband and I believe we will probably send him when he is 6 just because we would rather he be the oldest, biggest, and most mature boy instead of the youngest, smallest, least mature one. If he were a girl, we honestly would probably send her at 5, but girls also mature sooner than boys. One of the other things to consider is whether your son is into sports or not. Although tons can change between now and then, what happens if your son loves a sport? We figure we would rather have him be the oldest and have the advantage versus being the youngest and trying to play catch up.

Just like you though, we still haven't made a complete decision. Another option would be to send him to a private school (they offer tuition help) and put him in a transitional kindergarten. A friend who teaches kindergarten suggested this for our son because if they think he is ready he will just jump to 1st grade after his transitional year, but if they don't, he will start kindergarten at 6 instead of 5. She also told me that kindergarten isn't mandatory, so there wouldn't be an issue doing something like that.

Good luck...I feel your pain!

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L.L.

answers from Hartford on

My son's birthday is in October, so he started kindergarten at 4 years old. He fits in size wise and pretty much there have been no issues. He had some pre-school, but off and on because we moved so much. He is the youngest in his class, but you wouldn't know it. He is a more reserved, quite boy, but has made such excellent choices in friends. Depends on the kid I guess. You have a little time to decide.

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C.T.

answers from Denver on

Hi GK - my son started kinder when he was 5 yrs 1 mos old and he's doing great. He is in 2nd grade now and is already starting on some 3rd grade work in his classroom. He is the 2nd or 3rd youngest kid in his grade.

The reason we let him go was because he was ready. He was socializing well in the classroom and he was exhibiting age appropriate skills ie: pre-reading skills, letter and number recognition, etc. He would have been REALLY bored in another year of preschool.

My SIL held back her son from kinder for a year not really because of academics but because he didnt have a lot of social skills yet - he was still obsessed with trains and not really interested in talking about anything else, etc. He benefitted from holding off a year and went to a JrK program.

I guess you have to look at the whole picture and evaluate your son. If he is bright and well-adjusted, he'll probably do just fine even if he is small for his age.

I dont know what to say about his size - your doc can help guide you there. I will tell you that my husband has an old school friend named John. When all the other boys were going through puberty and growing mustaches, John still looked like a skinny 13 yr old and had funny thick glasses etc. My husband tells me he shows up the first day of school and had literally grown 5 or 6 inches over the summer, got new glasses and suddenly had all the cute girls at school following his every move.

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M.B.

answers from Boise on

Hold him back. Since he is small (you will not know if he will remain small or get to 6 feet until he is grown.) I have a nephew that was in the same size for 2 or 3 years and is about 5'9" now at 21. It will even be better than for a big kid. That said tho, you should put or keep him in pre-school. In kindergarten they are doing what first graders did 10-12 years ago. They read, do math, etc in kindergarten so you you want him to be ready. Do things with him all year and have projects like coloring, painting, cutting with scissors. Also, if he gets into sports he will benefit from the growing spirt in highschool and get to be an early driver instead of the last one to get his license.

Enjoy your children, they grow up way to fast.

Grandma to 11 - M. B. Boise Id.

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L.M.

answers from Denver on

My mom has been an elementary principal for 25 years. She always reccommends that kids with a summer birthday wait until they are six before starting school especially boys. She feels that even though they might seem ready it will catch up with them by the second or third grade. My son is a June baby and I will be wating. Hope this helps with your decision.

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B.G.

answers from Salt Lake City on

I have a son that was in the same situation. Because boys generally mature and develop slower than girls, they will sometimes struggle in school to keep up. It is my feeling that it is better to start them later than to be held back later, which often leads to a lifetime of negative feelings about learning and self-esteem.
Another option is to homeschool for Kindergarten and the one-on-one teaching will help your child succeed in learning. Then, place him in first grade or kindergarten depending on his development at that time.
As for the growing question, if he eats a well-balanced diet with a lot of fresh foods, I wouldn't worry. My personal opinion is that growth depends a lot on race. Just make sure he is well-nourished.

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K.H.

answers from Salt Lake City on

My son's birthday is in June and last year he turned 5 and we registered him for school. The teacher in not so many words told my husband and I that we should hold our son out 1 year before starting him in kindergarten because he didn't test well. He knew all the material but got a little scared. We chose to keep him in kindergarten and he is doing so well. I am so glad we didn't keep him out because he would have been really bored. He is loving to learn everything. I would suggest if you believe your son is ready to start school then let him go. If you feel after a few months that he is struggle you could always pull him out. But from my expierence he will probably do well. I don't believe he will have problems because he is small. Good luck in your decison.

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S.H.

answers from St. Louis on

check with your school district & get the KG readiness guidelines. If your son has been in daycare/preschool, then he should have the social skills mastered. Now is the time to work on the academic side of readiness.

Personal maturity is another issue to think about. Both of my sons began KG at age 6. With my oldest, we had no choice in the matter (Sept BD-so one month past cutoff). With our younger son, his BD was 4 days before the cutoff! We knew that he had an inability to stay focused & knew that this would adversely affect his education.

We went thru the KG screening, he aced it with high scores....BUT it took him twice as long to complete the screening. The team passed him, but I requested consideration for the PRE-K class available in our district. This class is provided for children of KG age, but not quite ready-either thru academics or social skills. This class is filled first with the children needing remedial academic help, then it is opened to the children who are simply not quite mature for a full day of school or lacking in basic social skills. We were very fortunate that he was placed in the class!

When we were making this decision, I asked the opinion of several educators. They were unanimous in their belief that age 6 is better for boys! One of the teachers said that in her lifetime of teaching, she has never known it NOT to work to the advantage of the child. What a profound & far-reaching statement! She also added that even if the child is ready for KG, those late-BD children tend to slow down by 2nd grade.....& we did see this happen with 2 of the 5 children in our circle of family.

Soooo, waiting until age 6 was beneficial for us. I would seriously pursue some type of screening thru your school district....prior to the KG screening. This is usually available thru Parents as 1st Teachers. Hope this helps!

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H.M.

answers from Cincinnati on

My son was a May baby, so he is just outside of this range that you're talking about. While he has some other educational issues (ADHD and recently diagnosed with Asperger's) he did great in Kindergarten and is still doing well in the Second Grade. I think that a lot of people are concerned about this nowadays and are right to be, but there is always the option of letting him go to Kindergarten now and if he doesn't seem ready for First grade next fall, letting him repeat Kindergarten -I've heard a lot of people doing this. The teachers will tell you if he is not keeping up.

My daughter is starting this fall and is also tiny (I guess that's not as much an issue with girls, but still - she is still in a 5pt harness as she only weighs 34 pounds.). I wouldn't worry about his size too much.

Every kid is different both educationally and physically. Does your school have a screening? You could always call and talk to someone at the school about your concerns, but I think, if it were me I would send him. Look up online some "Kindergarten Readiness" signs and you might find that he is more than ready.

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K.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

My son is turning 5 on Aug 17th. And he is starting kindergarten in September. I have know for years that he was going to be ready. He is precociously verbal. Confident. Social. Independent. He isn't as advanced on small motor skills (writing, scissors, coloring) as I would like but those seems like great skills to perfect in Kindergarten. He is the shortest one in his pre-school class though that is just genetics....He is just never gonna be a tall kid.

All his teachers encouraged us not the delay him and the district readiness assessment said the same thing. She tried hard to trick him into a wrong answer but failed every time.

I am an October baby myself and so was always among the oldest in my class. My mom had me tested to be sent early. And they were OK with it but cautioned her about my size...I was/am short & tiny. For that alone I was kept back.

I guess what I am saying is that you and your family and school professionals can be your guide. There are plenty of kids who are ready for kindergarten at 4 and plenty of 6 year olds who reeeaaaallly aren't ready.

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E.T.

answers from Denver on

My birthday is Nov. 23, and our school district had a cut-off date of Dec. 1 (this was back in the 70s). My mother was given a choice to start me at 4 or wait a year. She felt I was ready, so I started kindergarten at 4 (and college at 17). I didn't have any problems academically. And most of my problems socially were actually related to having a lot of much older siblings and acting "too old" for my age.

That said, the typical boy does mature less quickly emotionally and socially than the typical girl. I wouldn't let your son's current physical size influence your choice if you feel that he is ready intellectually, socially, and emotionally.

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