Learning Difficulties in 6Yr Old

Updated on December 17, 2008
R.A. asks from Middleport, NY
4 answers

I have a 6 year old daughter that we adopted at birth.she was born 6 weeks early.she has had a long road to over come since then, and she had stroke like systems right after birth that effected her left side. Was not able to lift or move the left arm or leg. She started pt at 6 months of age, speech at 3yrs old and ot at 5yrs old.she was taken off pt at age 5 but is till getting ot at school.her teachers this first marking period have been concerned about dyslexia (sorry if spelled wrong)and other learning problems.she is in a reading recovery program that is only 20 weeks long and about to end. She is still having many issues with reading, and spelling and general learning and remembering things.because she has issues with trying to understand things she has what we call melt downs. She is very upset or fussy when we don't understand her or she don't understand us.we are at a point that we can only do a yes or no answer to her.we can not elaborate on the question or answer we give to. She has a major short term memory problem.if something is given to her in the form of a song she will be able to remember it.it has been mentioned about apd(auditory processing disorder).i looked it up on line but still not sure what to do.we are in the process of having her tested for learning disabilities but nothing is complete as of yet.just wondering if someone else out there is going through the same thing and what are you doing to help them learn and retain what they learn.and the meltdown issues.thank you for your time and help.

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E.C.

answers from New York on

Hi R.,
I work with 3-6 year olds as a volunteer in the school system and I am also dyslexic. Las tyear we had a behavior problem child in one of my clesses. we were trying everything to reward his good behavior without excluding the 19 other children in the class. One day I gave him 2 thumbs down for his behavior and you should have seen the reaction I got. He desperately wanted that 2 tumbs up sign from me. This has lead to all the children wanting the 2 thumbs up for good behavior and with just that sign I have been able to get good behavior out of this child ithout saying a word in a crowded assembly.
We are now using this for effort in work. 2 thumbs up for effort doesn't mean perfect but it is for their individual effort. My 2 thumbs up for behavior and effort are now being use in 2 schools and the daycare in town :).

As for the dyslexia - welcome to the world of thinking out side the box. We dyslexics are the originators of this practice becasue our brains are wired differently thatn yours. One thing that I know about myself is that there are times when I really do not understand what you are saying. I say that my synapeses have snapped. I can hear the words but they are just not making any sense. When this happens I have learned to ask people to rephrase things. You might try this with your daughter. Instead of repeating yourself, change the wording, the position of the words, or see if there is another way of saying what you are trying to teach her.
I always learned through my 3 senses - 1 never worked. I am an auditory, visual and tactile learner. I have always needed all 3 to learn new concepts.

Relax with your daughter, both you and she will learn new ways to remember things. Both my son and I are dyslexic. I have a BA and a MA and have studied 4 languages in my life (learned 1 by living in a foreign country for 2 years). My son is 29 and a chef who is trying to decide another path in his life. When he was studying computer programming, he got a friend to go over the spelling of his programs before he could run them to find the programming problems. You see - new and inventive ways of doing things.

I wish you luck in this endevour and my best words of advice are to relax with the girl and do what you can but remember she will learn with a little help from her friends. She may graduate high school a year behind her fellows but is that the worst thing that can happen???

There is a great and fun life with a dysleic and enjoy it.

Betty from a sowy Ontario

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A.S.

answers from New York on

Dear R.,

Your daughter sounds like an amazing little girl. Her difficulties must be very overwhelming for both of you. Take a moment to really look at all she has accomplished in her short like given her circumstances. She sounds like she is making fabulous progress.

Kids with learning difference have to be given a lot of patience and time. School is A LOT to take in. It sounds like you have started the road to pinpointing her specific issues. That is great. While that is happening take the time to focus on what does she respond to positively. Does she like to be read to. Does she like videos. Does she like to draw, paint anything. I would feed that passion. Give her as much happiness and joy as possible. Give her more "I can do" than "I can't dos" and the "I cans" will increase. Minimize her frustrations by modifying what cause's them. School has a so many facets that a child like this can easily be overwhelmed.

My son is dyslexic. His dyslexia causes him great anxiety. He has a hard time with spelling reading math and writing. He loves documentaries. So i feed his passion, this is how he learns. He likes to draw and invent things. He keeps a drawing journal. If he has a story, I sit with him and I type it for him. Occasionally I will get him to write some things if it does not cause him too much anxiety.
This low stress approach is paying off. I actually caught him reading a magazine the other day. I am lucky to be able to homeschool him. My 7yo is ADHD and can not write but attends school. I do similar things for him as well. I found his most recent passion is Pokemon so for every positive thing he does he gets a new pokemon card. I also did neurofeedback therapy to help him with his ability to slow down his brain. It has helped. my youngest I suspect is ODD Oppositional Defiant Disorder. He is very intense, gets embarrassed or stressed and shy very easily get aggressive and is prone to meltdown when he can't cope or feels that he is not in control. I am working on how to deal with him. Mostly by remaining calm and validating that he is stressed and not punishing him for it. This is NOT easy and I am not always as good at it as I should be. I offer him space or ask him if he needs me to hold him. This surprisingly works many times particularly if i say we don't need to talk about it now.

Well I hope you can glean some sort of help out of my ramblings. If you have any questions feel free to email me ____@____.com

A.

PS the singing to remember is good but not the same as reading or learning symbols. eg children learn the ABC song but it is stored in a different part of the brain from reciting and recognizing the letters of the alphabet.

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K.K.

answers from Albany on

Dear R.,
I work with children who have learning struggles, and have since my daughter was diagnosed with learning disabilities in 6th grade. Today she is a sophomore in college on the dean's list with no accomodations. After 2 years of trainings and therapies, her IQ raised by 20 points. Because of her success story, I work with all the children I can to help them be successful. With success comes relief from the frustration of being unable to communicate, as you see in your daughter. My philosophy is to find the causes of the struggles (dyslexia can be a visual problem, or a cognitive processing problem. These can be overcome with the correct training, because the brain is plastic - it can be trained). Once the causes are found, I recommend therapies and trainings that are designed to relieve the symptoms enough for success. Perfection is not the goal - success for the individual is. If you want a place to start your research, please go to my web site: www.HowYourMindWorksLady.com If you live near me, and would like to continue this conversation, please feel free to do so!
By the way, I once worked with a young man who had brain damage at birth, and did not have much physical functioning on his right side - the damage had been done on the left side of his brain, the side where language is processed. After cognitive training one summer, he learned to read the next summer - at age 14!! There is definitely hope for your daughter - don't give up!

K. Johnson, MS Ed

D.D.

answers from New York on

By law the public school system must give your child whatever additional help is needed to assist in her education. Has the school done a total evaluation on her to determine her abilities, strengths, and weaknesses? I don't know where you are located but in Connecticut if I parent requests and evaluation the school is obligated to do so. Furthermore if the school system can not provide a program for your child then they are obligated to locate a program in another community and pay for your child to enroll and attend including transportation to and from the school.

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