Left Basement Door Open

Updated on June 08, 2015
L.G. asks from Windsor, CT
22 answers

Okay I accidentally left the basement door open all morning while I was cleaning my living room. My toddler was wandering freely around the house during this time. I don't believe he messed with the basement door but wanted some extra reassurance. I would have known or heard him if he fell right? I'm really mad at myself for leaving it open but feel paranoid that I could have missed him stumbling in some way. It sounds crazy as I type but hopefully someone here is compassionate enough to talk me off the ledge :) I just want to make sure that there would definitely be a noisy commotion if something had happened. I hate the idea of him having access to a dangerous area for that long. I'm actually in disbelief that he wouldn't notice the door being open.

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So What Happened?

Thank you for the responses and reassurance. I do feel very silly for posting about this. I was having some serious mommy guilt. I so appreciate honest parenting conversations. We all make mistakes and learn from them. My son seems fine and very happy. Just to clarify: my son only wandered out of the room a few times. He was with me 90% of the time and my house is very baby proofed (obviously not including my screw up today). I don't know how to watch him every second but I sincerely do try.Thanks again

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M.G.

answers from Portland on

There would be a bump and a wail.

You're good.

I once went outside to grab the mail, and the door slammed shut behind me and locked. I had to wait ten minutes till we broke in. I had a crawler at the time. So I know what you mean - the "what could have happens" freak you out. I don't think I breathed until door was open. House was totally baby proofed but still ..

Breathe :) You're good (and happens to all of us).

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O.O.

answers from Los Angeles on

We're moms, not perfect people.
When we know better? We do better.
Bet you'll never forget that again.

3 moms found this helpful

More Answers

T.F.

answers from Dallas on

You know I did something stupid when my daughter was about 3. I'll never ever forget that day.

I had been in my master bath upstairs taking a much needed bath while daughter napped. She came in, I got out to go take care of her and I got sidetracked. I always ran the water out when I got out but for some reason that day I didnt.

I took care of her needs, I got sidetracked when hubby called because he needed something. After I got off the phone I didn't see her in her room. I called for her, twice. I went into my room and she was in my bath water. She smiled with the happiest face... And said " mommy I'm in bubbles like you"

I cried, I prayed a lot and I thanked God for not making my child a statistic that day.

Like you.,. You are thankful everything is ok but you'll never forget again. I've shared that experience with my daughter ( now 20) and I told her how I felt like a failure and how that mistake could have cost us forever and how thankful I am that God protected her.

We mess up sometimes as moms. Hopefully we learn when we mess up. Be thankful your little one is ok. Move forward and don't make that mistake again!!

8 moms found this helpful

X.O.

answers from Chicago on

So your toddler doesn't appear to be injured or distressed, and you didn't hear any crying or screaming? Your toddler should be just fine. Pour yourself a nice glass of wine and try to relax a bit. Parenting is tough enough without imagining problems that didn't happen.

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T.H.

answers from Kansas City on

Yeah I think you would have noticed if he fell, especially down the stairs. My kids has fallen down the stairs lots of times, especially my son. I realize this makes me sound like a horrible parent, pretty sure I'm not, but truly he is a combination of clumsy and wild and he and the stairs don't mix. He's 5 and he still does it from time to time. There is always crying…but the good news is he has never been seriously injured! (although we have been the to the ER a few times. :-/ )

I wouldn't stress. In fact, I would teach your kid how to navigate the stairs. It won't take long, but it could be a stressful couple weeks, but you will feel much better about him and stairs. It's a life skill that I think is best to start on early!!

5 moms found this helpful
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M.D.

answers from Pittsburgh on

You are looking at your child and he's fine, right? So he's fine.

If it makes you feel better, my son did fall down steps as a toddler. There was a lot of crying and commotion immediately after (definitely could not have missed it), but he too was fine.

5 moms found this helpful

R.A.

answers from Boston on

Oh I can relate. We had a door to our basement right in the hallway. Once my son was able to walk and open things, we had to put a lock on it. Just to be sure. It was a long staircase and exposed the bottom of the basement floor, so we always took precautions!

Don't beat yourself up, but just learn and be proactive. Good that their wasn't any issues!! I'd just take a deep breath and thank God myself!

Hugs!

5 moms found this helpful
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M.R.

answers from Washington DC on

Please don't get so stressed about what didn't happen THIS time. Instead, since you clearly have a set of stairs into the basement: Be proactive instead of worrying about "what ifs" and get good gates for the top and bottom of the stairs.

They truly need to be gates that attach to the door frame with screws. Never use a "pressure mounted gate" at the top of stairs. A child leaning hard against a pressure mounted gate, or running into it, can dislodge it, and the gate, and the child, will still end up going down the stairs. So for your own peace of mind, consider gates at top and bottom. (Bottom gate is to keep a young child from climbing up stairs without a parent knowing it and falling back down them. I saw it happen in my own house during a play group meeting when a little boy got halfway up our stairs and then turned and fell all the way back down, literally head over heels. I thought we'd be calling the ambulance. He was fortunately OK and his mom was pretty cavalier about it when he wailed but I was terrified and got a bottom gate after that.)

Whether you would have heard your child fall would depend on things like where you were in the house at the time, whether those stairs are carpeted, etc. Focus on childproofing the stairs rather than on hoping you'd hear something, so you prevent any fall from happening rather than wondering if you would hear it. He's fine for now and you have a chance to get yourself some reassurance with some good quality gates..

You can check out this article: http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2012/03/12/stairs-at-home-r...

5 moms found this helpful

S.T.

answers from Washington DC on

i'm a little confused. i mean, you know where the child is now, right? and he isn't damaged or bruised or unconscious.
so nothing bad happened.
so why are you on the ledge?
no one can tell you if he fell down or bumped his head or opened a door he wasn't supposed to or had tea with the house ghost or not. some falls and bumps and haunted tea parties are noisy. some aren't.
but he's okay. so what's the problem?
if you want reassurance that you're not a bad mom, you're totally not. i can think of a few occasions when my boys were little that i was stupendously stupid and really terrible things could have happened. i'm SO grateful that they didn't.
he probably DID stumble in some way. toddlers do that. but you're off the hook for this time, so be happy and don't wallow in it.
khairete
S.

5 moms found this helpful
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P.K.

answers from New York on

You got lucky this time. You never let a toddler roam around the house!

4 moms found this helpful
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J.G.

answers from Chicago on

If your child is fine, then there is nothing to worry about.

4 moms found this helpful
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S.S.

answers from Atlanta on

I watched my first born son fall down the stairs when he was about 13 months old. it was horrible. He fell hard enough to knock himself out, there was no crying. Tyler and I were mortified. We called 9-1-1.

How did it happen? We were carrying groceries from the commissary in from the car. Tyler thought I had our son, I thought he had our son and he was following us. Our foyer was the stained concrete flooring, so it was hard. Can I just tell you that we bought a huge rug for the foyer the next day!! And from that point forward, we called out like some sport, I've got him. He was fine. A concussion. No broken bones. Whew!

I thought for sure CPS would be called on us for this. No. They could see it was a mistake. None of us are perfect. There is no manual to be a parent.

This is one of those moments where you thank your lucky stars, God or whoever you believe in that nothing happened!

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S.R.

answers from Kansas City on

Yup! Been there too, except with my special needs child and that was a day i will never forget. We were living in an apt while our house was being built. I was getting ready for work one morning and didn't hear her open the front door. It was pretty heavy and so i just assumed she couldn't open it, boy was i wrong! After about a minute of me not hearing her i peeked out in the living room (our apt was very small) and noticed she wasnt there. I dont know what compelled me to look at the front door but i could tell it wasnt completely shut... i immediately ran and there she was standing at the top of the 15 step staircase just staring at the bottom. OMG!! I grabbed her and cried! I was so EFFIN mad at myself for thinking she couldnt open the door. All I could think about is the worst! Lesson learned... now next time around you will make sure you know where your baby is all the time!

4 moms found this helpful

T.S.

answers from San Francisco on

You may or may not have heard him fall, how could any of us know?
I suggest you keep your toddler in the room where you are working, it's generally not a good idea to let them roam freely unsupervised all morning.
SMH.

4 moms found this helpful

W.W.

answers from Washington DC on

L.

Welcome to mamapedia! I'm confused. You need reassurance because your son is OKAY right now? Or are you upset with yourself for creating a situation where he MIGHT have been hurt? Or do you think you're a bad mom?

You can talk yourself off the ledge of this one yourself. Your son is FINE, right? He did NOT venture down the basement door. He was NOT hurt.

If you want to have "peace of mind"? Put up a gate on the OTHER side of the door so that IF you leave it open, he can't fall down the stairs.

You are NOT a bad mom. Allowing your son to "roam" the house is NOT bad. You're okay!!

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C.N.

answers from Baton Rouge on

If he isn't hurt, why are you torturing yourself with what could have happened but didn't. Just be thankful that he's okay and resolve to pay closer attention to the door.

3 moms found this helpful

C.V.

answers from Columbia on

Oh man, that sure is one of those "THANK GOD!" moments!

It's okay, mama. This is a learning opportunity for you. Lesson learned, and you won't forget the door again!

3 moms found this helpful

T.D.

answers from Springfield on

dd tumbled down the 3 steps to the landing before the basement about 8 months ago.. it was a significant rucus that i was able to hear easily. and it was followed by loud crying. so you would definitely know if your kid tumbled down the steps.
i would just be more cautious in the future to make sure the door is closed and get a latch up high so when your little one learns to open doors you can latch it and prevent a problem then too. (my ds can unlock the door with a fingernail and open it.. up high latches were the next option.. he is a climber though so up high latches didn't work long)
relax and work on preventing it in the future!

3 moms found this helpful

D.D.

answers from Boston on

Yes if he fell down the stairs you would have heard the crying. Don't beat yourself up over this. Its a learning experience and I'm sure that you'll never make that mistake again. Moms get busy and sometimes we just forget stuff. Nothing bad happened. Give your little one an extra hug.

3 moms found this helpful

O.H.

answers from Phoenix on

Sometimes if you fall and hit your head and are knocked out, no, their isn't any "crying or commotion" so don't assume you would "hear" if anything happened. Choking doesn't make any noise either.

Be happy that nothing happened this time and don't stress about the 'what if's'. Good luck.

3 moms found this helpful

D.B.

answers from Boston on

Yes, you've had heard something! Don't beat yourself up over this. The "what could haves" will drive you nuts if you let them. Today it's the stairs, next it will be playing outside, then it will be playing soccer, then driving. Half the time, kids who fall down the steps are so relaxed, they just tumble and bounce - no that I'm recommending it , you understand, but usually it's not devastating even if it happens.

We've all done it. More than once. Most of us admit it. We've also misplaced our kids in a store, watched them run into traffic, given them the keys to the car, and a hundred other actions that prove we are human.

I suggest you go down to the hardware store and get an automatic closure attachment for doors you want to stay closed. Just be sure they aren't locking doors - if they are, change the doorknob or position a key someplace accessible so you can get back in. This applies to the outside doors when you go out to get the mail and your cheerful toddler slams the door and fiddles with the lock.

You can also get those toddler-proof doorknob covers to keep your kid from opening a door - we used them on the outside and basement doors, but also on the inside of our kid's bedroom door so he could be put in time out and had to stay there!

2 moms found this helpful

M.D.

answers from Washington DC on

If he fell you would know. There is no way he would fall and you wouldn't know. He's fine.

We all do things that we shouldn't, often times on accident. It happens. The door being left open isn't the end of the world. Even if he did fall, he would likely be completely fine. Glad all is okay though.

1 mom found this helpful
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