First of all I would like to say thank you for everyones advice on the boyfriend issue. I talked to my grand-daughter today and asked her why exactly she liked him and what she ment by hes treated her the best and I would much rather her be with him than the losers she told me about.
also, we got report cards this week and she has improved dramatically and I am thinking if she can keep up the good grades then I might let her get her lip/tongue pierced because her mother was actually taking her out to look into a lip ring the day before she died.
She hasnt begged, only asked a few times, but fought her battle without being immature.
My question is what do ya'll think? I am worried about what others will think with me letting her do that.
Shes plenty capable of taking care of piercings because she is looking into an apprenticeship at the palor down the road and has been gauging her lobes since she was in 8th grade. She knows more about piercings than most people with them. Her school has no dress code on piercings tattoos (her boyfriend has both)
I am not worried about the job part, for she is taking an apprenticeship at a tattoo palor down the road because her brotehr knows the main piercer there, adn her thing is "While I am in college, I can be a piercer, cause Ill be in college and drunk idiots love to get piercings"
Lip... maybe. Tongue, no. The tongue piercing sends across a very sexual message that I feel 16 is too young for... (they are supposed to intensify oral sex...)
She is a no longer a little child, and it is her body. I would let her do it. I have had both done, still have my lip one in. The great thing about piercings is that they can be removed if/when she changes her mind. By allowing her to do it you are telling her you see her as her own person capable of making her own choices about her body and image, and that will mean a lot to her.
There are worst things a 16 year old could want or do to their body than a lip or tongue piercing. However, while both can lead to infections, I know multiple people that got severe infections with the tongue ring, and you also have the issue of food getting stuck in the hole, which completely grosses me out. Also, a lot of people lose the enamel on their teeth from the tongue ring, by constantly rubbing the tongue ring against their teeth. I also think at 16 kids should have jobs. So if she is going to be getting a job, or if she has a job, make sure that the piercing is okay with the job. She will be looked at differently in a job interview if she has a lip or tongue piercing.
you might want to check what her school's dress codes are first. Our high school had a rule against facial and tongue peircings.
Also, people with tongue piercings end up with a lot of teeth problems, it wears away the enamel and can cause big gaps in the front teeth.
A must read for anyone even remotely thinking of piercing their tongue:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/dr-douglas-fields/body-pier...
One improved report card does not a changed attitude make. I would give her a giftcard to her favorite store and take her out to dinner for this one report card. She should be doing well for herself, not to get "rewards."
I would tell her that for those piercings, she's going to have to wait until she's 18. That you cannot in good conscience place her life in jeopardy with a mouth piercing.
i say let her!! i got my lip pierced at 15 and then my tongue at 17....my mom was very liberal when it came to that stuff because she really didnt care how i dressed or what i looked like as long as i was doing good in school and not causing any trouble.
Ugh, I have to admit I hate those piercings but that's just me. I do however agree with Red about the tongue piercing, one thing comes to mind when you see it b/c of it's typical intentions but it also carries the added risk of chipped teeth so I'd ask her to skip that one.
Before you make any decissions, I think you should do some research. Don't just take her word for it. What's involved? What are the chances of infection? What happens 4 years from now and she no longer wants the piercing?
IMO - she's a child. This is a big decission as it will effect her in the future as far as careers and education. Her plan now may be to work in a piercing studio, but what about in 2 years, or 4 years? I would NOT let her do it.
I might go for the lip piercing- but not the tongue just because they freak me out and teenagers are hard enough to understand. But if her mother approved the lip I would go with that. Good luck
Sounds like she deserves a reward (grades)...though I think I would go for something a little less likely to cause issues down the road (teeth, infection, etc.). If it were me I would try to find another way to allow her to express her individuality. She is 2 years from adulthood...then if she she wants to risk all the problems that "can" be associated with a tongue piercing...it will be of her own volition. BUT...who cares what others think. My argument is over health not opinion.
I haven't read the other responses yet so this may have already been said but, be VERY careful about getting her tongue pierced because it can and often does severely damage the teeth. It can crack the back teeth very easily.
I'd say no, at 16 regardless of her reasoning why this would be ideal. Let her become an adult first and then make these decisions for herself. She just might rethink this issue when she's older. Good luck!
If she wants to do it I say let her. If you take her and get it done it will be a lot safe then her or one of her friend doing it for her. So many teens are doing this because they are told they can't get it done. It is not clean or safe to have a friend do this. So if you are okay with it then there is nothing wrong with it.
I'm not into piercings, but if that's the best reward for her continuing to improve her grades, then do it. She'll get them eventually anyway.
I don't know about North Carolina, but where I live piercings are really common. Many kids in middle school have lip piercings.
If you spent your life worrying about what everyone thought about everything you did, you'd have to curl up in a fetal position and never leave the house.
I've always thought it's a REALLY good thing people can't read minds, 'cause then we'd all hate each other. :)
If she wee my daughter she wouldn't have been gauging her lobes since the 8th grade. What is she going to study in college? Does she kmow what is appropriate for the workers there. All I can say is "Career Limiting Move" on the tongue and lip piercing.
Those pierceings are gross. Absolutely not. I have 3 girls and there will be no tattoos or piercings other than ears until they are out of my house and supporting themselves.
Lisa
I did not read all of your responses, but I did respond to both of your questions on her that you have posted about your granddaughter and this boyfriend! You need to stop worrying about what OTHERS think about your granddaughter and her boyfriend! I believe you are worried your friends won't be your friends anymore because you are letting your 16yr old run her own live or run you over! And really this isn't the case. It sounds like she is a really good girl who is getting good grades in school and be thankful she is still in school, which means you are raising her right. As far as piercings, I would not let her gauge her earlobes!! They will never grow back and not look right at any job interview when she grows up. So to me that would be a BIG NO NO! A nose piercing, or lips or eyebrow piercing would be alright. The tongue I would say no too cause it could break the back teeth. Not everyone breaks their teeth if she throws that at you but alot of people have including my friend who is now 34 and now she wished she didn't do it when she was alot younger cause now her back teeth are bad and she had the prettiest teeth when we where growing up and into our 20's! And now they are all gone cause of the piercing. Just lay your foot down on that and offer the other ones to her. Good Luck grandma!!
IMO I wouldn't let her do it. She's only 16 and some holes like the gauging of the ear lobes depending on how big will never close up. IF she does that with her lip she will look like one of those tribal people in Africa. My parents never let me get anything like that. And when I went to live with my grandpa he said no tattoos or piercings in his house hold. Not even a few months after turning 18 and moving out I got my first tattoo on my right shoulder blade. Since then I have had my nose pierced but got infected so I took it out, and I have gotten 3 more tattoos and want a couple more. But my tattoos are medium sized to small. The only big ones I have is my first one and the one I got for my son when he was born of a Koi fish on my forearm with his name.
She's 16 only has 2 more years to go before she's 18 I'd say wait til she's 18 then let her get what she wants. That's just me. I am only 23 so what do I really know hahahahaha I am still learning myself. :) good luck.
I might be fussy and I have a toddler so I haven't experienced this but for me, it's 18 for tatoos and non-ear piercing. Of course, I may change my tune when I have to deal with a teenager myself. :) She sounds like a good girl though and like you two are close. Don't worry about what others might think--if you know she is doing what she needs to do then do what you feel is best. If anyone asks you about it you can tell them she earned it by doing well in school and was mature when asking about it.
I agree that lip--maybe (especially if her mom was OK with it) but tongue--NO WAY! WAAAAAY to sexual for a 16 year old.
