Moms with ADHD Teenagers Needing Social Setting

My dear C., you definitely have my sympathy. I had a son who was ADD and then married a man with three children, two of whom were ADHD. Our life was such a turmoil and we spent many hours worrying and fretting over what would become of them. The boy, who took everything apart and destroyed everything he could get his hands on, finally found out the things he destroyed weren't cheap and especially, if it was his. He is doing better now and not on any medication anymore. The girl on the other hand has had her problems, although she did graduate from school, even with having a mental retardation problem. We tried to keep them busy with projects, such as helping his dad with mechanics and her with catching bugs and butterflys and pets. She is doing pretty good also now. They are 21 and 23, but believe me, I thought it was going to cost us both our sanity dealing with them. He still cannot leave anything alone that has a wire and she has unfortunately turned into somewhat of a lady of the night. She's 21, what can you do. As my Dad used to say, "You raise them up to 18 and if they do wrong after that, you can't blame yourself, they weren't taught that way. Try the projects things though and I would also advise sports. Good luck, God be with you.

Check with your local school, they should have programs available or know of available programs. Also check with the local Department of Human Services as they can often point you to programs in your area that are free to low income families.

My son has ADHD and my daughter and myself have ADD....always a struggle. Both my kids are very social but with my son, his problem was in the kids he choose to hang around with (kids who get into trouble). The school has a program called AEA that brought in a therapist to see him at school once a week. The school had a program to help kids who weren't making good choices but hadn't been in trouble as yet...both of these things helped my son quite a bit though he wasn't happy about doing them at first (they are both free programs) as he was embarrassed to be in a group of his peers but once he got in there and found that these kids had much the same problems, he settled down and did very well.

Our local town had a program for kids his age that I also got him involved in (it was free to us as we are low income as well) that helped him work on his social skills and decision making skills (he choose the one on one rather than the group tho it was available to him). As I said, he wasn't happy about any of it, but once he got involved and tried what they suggested, he found that it helped him quite a bit.

AEA (Area Education Assistance) is a Federal/Nation wide program offered everywhere but I've found that schools will not tell people about it, you must ask but it is always free (they don't like putting out the money for it as it is the schools responsibility to pay/provide it). Working with them is great, but be forwarned, you will have to meet with them and his teachers to find out exactly what he needs help with at school and work together with them to figure out what will work best for him...it's a trial and error thing, but once everyone figures out what works best for your son, that is what everyone will continue to do to help him.

My son has sensory issues that needing tending to and the school, with AEA's involvement, set it up so that he can go to the gym after every other class and play basketball and run around (leaving class two min. early and arriving at the next one two min. late) as it helped him work out some energy that had built up so that he could pay attention in class better. When a teacher is available to assist him, he gets to go into the weight room and work out. They also provided therabands for him to work out with as well (when his asthma is acting up, it's a quiet activity but helps him to burn off energy). This has helped him quite a bit and his grades improved and with the assistance of the other programs that we found, he is making better decisions as well. I'm sure that they will have programs available to help socialize your son as well. Good luck to ya hun!! :)

my daughter also has add, I was diagnosis later in my life. And I fighting for her to get a better life, persuing a carreer and grow as much normal. But what is normal, if you think every body has something. So "normality" is a utopy.
I praid, I tried to show her healthy habits, like clean the room, etc.
The worst part for me is her anxiaty.
She was under medication, concerta, but she decided that she doesn't wanted to continue because was not helping her. She is also under fluoxetine, and I'm thinking to try not to anymore.
They so young to struggle with this medication.
I don't know how severe is your son case, everyone is different. I will try to find help for you, to get techniques or tools to help you to deal with.
If you don't have resources, did you try through the goverment.
good luck

I also have a son with ADHD with behavior issues that can alienate him. Here are the sites for two parent centers who offer social programs in NE.

http://www.pti-nebraska.org/index.asp?intPageId=86
http://www.olliewebbinc.org/arc/friends.shtml

Good luck to you and your son. Go Navy!!