We are moving from NYC to Los Angeles this summer. We have a soon to be 5 yr old and a 2.5 year old. I am worried about our older child who is very attached to her friends and our nanny. We've had our nanny since she was 3 months old. We have not told the kids yet of the move we plan on showing them the house we bought this week (we are vacationing in Los Angeles this week).
Any suggestions on how to make the move to a new state starting a new school easier for the kids? We have friends and a lot of family in California, which we had no family in NY so that is a big change. Their cousins are all in LA and they love playing with them. I want to make the move special and less scary and make sure they are happy.
Take them to Disneyland with their cousins as well as the beach with cousins. They'll soon realize how cool LA is:)
One of my friends moved a lot as a kid (she was in her terms an air force brat). She said the best thing she remember was that her parents never made it a bad thing. They were always told that they were setting out on a new adventure. Her parents would talk about all the new things at their new home, what fun things were near by to do, if they already knew someone living in the area and all the fun they would have with that person.
If you move in time maybe enroll in some kind of activity (ie. dance/swimming/etc.) so you and the children can meet the families that you will start seeing when school time starts.
Good luck!
First it will be more traumatic/stressful for you than it will be for either of them.
I have moved 7 times, four with infants and toddlers. I would much rather move with a little one than with a high school sophomore or senior. Our last two moves were just plain hell.
Show them pictures.
Have them call Grandma and the cousins.
Talk up how wonderful LA will be.
Say that Nanny will stay here but she can visit, but do not make it a big deal.
They will forget her in time when you get new nanny.
I sent my 3 and 9 yo with my mom and she brought them out later, from IL to NC
From NC to CA we camped with a 6 month old, a 3 yo, 6 yo and 12 yo.
From CA to VA mom took the 4 yo and 7 yo to IL, and we picked them up on our way to VA, we had the 2 yo and 14 yo.
From VA to NC, we made a trip home to Chicago then back to NC. THey were 5, 8, 11, and 17.
We usually made it a vacation-move. So we took in the sites, Badlands, Mt Rushmore, Grand Canyon. We did fun stuff before we ended at our destination.
Focus on the positives. Show your kids (especially the 5 year old) the places/things they will LOVE in L.A. and then when you go back home to pack/move keep talking about how great it will be to live there. Keep talking about what they saw that they loved and can't wait to go back to. We moved when my son was 5 and my daughter a baby. When we came to NM to househunt he saw 2 skateparks and was SO excited to move here. I was so worried about him leaving behind his best friends and his nanny and everyone he had known his whole life, but he did great. Even though I felt awful about moving and felt like crying, I did not let it show at all! I just talked up how awesome it was going to be at our new home. It made me realize kids really live in the moment. Once we moved we celebrated Christmas in our new house (it was just after Christmas), so even though our belongings had not arrived yet he had some new toys to play with. Then he started school immediately and I talked to people and scheduled playdates right away --- starting that first week! He's a very social kid and I knew he would need to be around other kids and make friends quickly. After living here a couple months he came across a photo of his old babysitter and he burst out crying...this made me sad. It also made me realize we should not show him photos of his old friends until after we had been here a while. Besides that our son was very positive about the move and adjusted well.
Pump up on the good things about the move. Getting to see cousins all the time, the weather stuff like that.
Wait on the negitive until closer to the leave... like leaving the nanny.
As for school, I wouldn't worry about that until the time comes to enroll in school. Hopefully between the time you have moved and settled in and school starts she will have met some kids that will be in her school and she wont be as scared. At that age they make friends pretty quick.
Good luck!
Let them help design their rooms. I know they are little but maybe help pick out something new for their rooms. Helped my kids to feel like it was theirs.
Other than that...just pump up the super positive parts. But I would tell them about leaving nanny and friends now so they can get used to the idea.
Show them a map...where you are now, where you're going to be. So they can visualize the distance.
Young kids are extremely flexible. The 2.5 yo will hardly notice/remember. The 5yo will, but it will be fine. I moved a lot as a kid (air force brat). The nice thing is they each have a sibling and you have more family in LA. I agree with the other posts, talk it up and be excited.
I moved every two to three years growing up. I LOVED it! It was always an adventure and my parents always made it fun. My dad was a Navy pilot...so we went where the Navy told us.
I think having siblings helped a lot, because I always had friends. And just being flexible. At that age, they will both be fine. A new school will be fine and while she will miss the nanny big time, she'd be going to school full-time soon anyways, right? So she'd see a lot less of her too.
You guys need to play the fun parents for the move and it will work out great! Good luck!
