Music and Your Children

Updated on March 03, 2011
D.D. asks from Portland, OR
20 answers

What kind of music do you let your children listen to?
I let my kids listen to whatever they want. Whatever they like. I grew up on pop (and rap...some hardcore rap) and I turned out completely fine. I'm even a successful bussiness woman! I don't think my music choices influenced any of my behaviors...none of which was bad (I swear).
IMO - I think parents are way too concerned with what their kids are listening to. Yes, I let my preschooler listen to all the pop music out there. She loves Justin Bieber - so what. She likes Pink and Katy Perry. Does that mean she is going to run out and try to dress and act like them? Probably not...I don't know what the big deal is.
I bring this up because I had an in-law family member make a comment how my youngest is too young to be liking Justin Bieber. What??? Its just music! Music is a big part of my family's life. For us - we like to put it on and get up and dance and sing. It puts us in a good mood. It's something that brings us happiness. So why would I try to choose what they are going to listen to? I don't want to choose what is going to make them happy. I want them to be able to make the decision on what makes THEM happy.
I am sure whatever they listen to will not determine what kid of person they will grow up to be...

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R.J.

answers from Salt Lake City on

I have always had music around my kids, all kinds of music, some that people think is too old for them but when my youngest was about 6 he had write a thing on "mom" and his favorite thing " Car dancing with my mom to Kid Rock" yep his favorite song was Amen by kid rock. Both of them now have every kind of music you can imagine on their iPods from Eminem to Simon and Garfunkel. They dont like Rap and that is okay with me. I dont think it is the music that forms them.

4 moms found this helpful

A.S.

answers from Detroit on

I agree with you. I don't let my 2yr old listen to 'Pop That P*ssy'... But my 7yr old listening to 'Hot n Cold' by Katy Perry... Doesn't bother me.

My 7yr old listens to ALL KINDS of music. Everything from Canons to Pokerface, Sir Mix a Lot, Kid Rock, Shania Twain, Paul Oakenfold, Cars Soundtrack, The Who....... The list is long. But why? Because she gets exposed to all of it.

That's how I grew up. Exposed to every kind of music out there.

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A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

We are pretty flexible with music when they are older, but there are some songs or artists that I don't think young kids need to be exposed to. I don't think an 8 yr old needs to be repeating some of the topics Eminem or Kid Rock or whoever are singing about. Save those for later when you can discuss the topics and they can better understand the art behind words and lyrics. We have what we call the "kid list" on our ipods - music that is cleaned up or was appropriate in the first place that we can also tolerate listening to. It needn't all be Barney or Wiggles, but I don't think kids should get cart blanche with media, either.

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M.C.

answers from Washington DC on

My kids listen to all kinds of music. Country, Rock, Heavy Metal.

I draw the line at the lyrics. Cussing, lude topics, etc. = no way!

My 4y girl knows all of the lyrics to 'Rain Makes Corn', we tweaked her brother taught her different words for Whiskey and Frisky ... lol

My 9y knows all of the lyrics to 'We will Rock You'.

M.

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A.J.

answers from Williamsport on

We're having to reign ourselves in a bit more now that the kids pay attention. Like, sometimes to clean house I'll go back to my 80's goth roots and put in "I walk the line" by Alien Sex Fiend. Not long ago, I heard my 3 year old saying, "My business is a little cloak and dagger...I drink so much I don't walk..I merely STAGGER..." He even had the english accent and angry snarl down. :) Not so much that I mind, but who knows what the teachers in his Christian pre school would think next year....We stick to classic rock for good poetry and get questions like, "Mom, why is he riding through the desert? Why doesn't his horse have a name?" When I was little I liked stories in songs like Kenny Rogers the Gambler (and the johnny cash 'I walk the line') and stuff, so I think it's a good genre for kids.

Agreed, scary music never made me bad as a teen, but we're trying to be a little responsible with profanity etc just like in shows and movies, while they're super young which we don't have much of anyway, but lots of our albums from days of yore are pretty dark. My hubs is a heavy metal musician-and not the glossy kind, the scary kind.
When I was a pre- teen, I had every prince album up until Purple Rain which I had bought with my own allowance, and my mom got wind of the vulgar lyrics in darling nikki and took them all away and broke them while I was at school. It was pretty much the demise of our relationship on some level.
Justin Bieber? That in law needs to go back to live in the Disney Princess Castle. ALTHOUGH, I did think twice about letting my 5 year old listen to Lady Gaga's "I wanna take a ride on your disco stick" song and changed the station, so maybe I am sort of a granny now.

3 moms found this helpful
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C.N.

answers from Baton Rouge on

I allowed my daughter to listen to (and read and watch) whatever she liked as well, and she turned out just fine.

3 moms found this helpful
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D.P.

answers from Raleigh on

I am a musician, and love all music. My son and I were listening to the White Album by The Beatles just the other day when "Why Don't We Do it in the Road" came on. I thought this was a good time to get him to clap in rhythm. Then, my 4 yo son asks me, "What are they doing in the road?" and I said- "Stopping at a stop sign". Then he said "Well, daddy needs to do it in the road then." (He is notorious for his "California stopping"). LOL
Then my hubby was listening to Jane's Addiction "Been Caught Stealing" the other day. My son was singing it all day after. He didn't get the words at all so he asked what it was about. I just told him it was about naughty boys stealing and getting in trouble with their mommies. Then he made up his own words about naughty things he's been caught doing. It was hilarious!
Anyway, I am with you. I want to raise my kids with a good understanding and decent taste in music. Everything is a lesson in life- we as parents decide how we want to teach it and foster our kids learning. It's all about helping my kids make good choices in life, and music is just one tool I use to do that. After all, the world isn't one warm-fuzzy Barney song. It's filled with all types of people and choices, and it's never to early to expose them to diversity.

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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

My son loves everything from oldies to classical to classic rock from the 70's to pop and Big Time Rush. Because my husband has "limited" taste in music (he's a "greatest hits CD kind of guy! LOL), I feel it is MY job to instill good musical taste, therefore, no Pink or Lady Gaga or hardcore rap going on here.....

There will come a day when you will be explaining the lyrics to your pre-schooler. I would rather choose that time than have it forced due to explicit lyrics.

But you're a parent, you're free to do whatever you like!

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A.B.

answers from New York on

We are a musical family. My hubs has a studio in the house and he and my 8 yr old son rock out. Occassionaly my kiddo hears the "wrong" version my hubs puts on and he tells his dad "bad words dad you don't want to owe mom a quarter do you?" I have classical, piano training and I love most R&B and pop. My son is very diverse and has yet to find music he doesn't really like, except for "gross romantic songs". What I do moniter is TV/Movies. I have a freind who lets her 7 yr old watch Freddy Crugger and Saw movies, the kid is terrified for weeks, that is a no pass zone for me. Music is up for interpretation and feeling it!!!!

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J.C.

answers from San Francisco on

Im with you... my two year old listens to children's music and whatever I like. I don't really want her listening to really inappropriate songs, but usually I have no taste for them anyway. I think a good range of music is really important for kids too!

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B.B.

answers from Dallas on

Before I read the other comments. I totally agree. I like slow jams and some neo-soul.... But my kids like rap.... Like hardcore rap, they like ugk, devin, whatever my husband listens to, they don't like my music lol, they are only 2 & 3.... But they also like nursery rymes and kids songs, do I think they are going to grow up bad.... No they like what they like... Their your kids, you know them better then anybody else. If their happy with it, go for it

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C.T.

answers from Santa Fe on

My husband and I LOVE music...many different kinds. We used to go out and hear live music a lot before kids, sigh. Anyway, we are happy that our son just loves music as well. He has since he was one! His first words were different musical instruments and he has always loved to dance. He is almost 7yrs old and is still very passionate about music. He loves popular music w a lively beat bc he loves to dance to it...which means he just loves things like The Black Eyed Peas and Bob Sinclair and Lady Gaga and Kei$ha. My young child has introduced me to all this new music - it's pretty funny! I'm not a big fan of Lady Gaga and Kei$ha but we do let him listen to some of their songs. Some have really inappropriate lyrics so we look for the radio version or just don't listen to those songs. He just LOVES it though and is a little dance machine. We avoid many of the videos too - they are all on YouTube but we have the rule that you can pick the "lyrics only" video. Just thought I'd let you know we are a family that also really loves music and we have regular dance fests in the livingroom! I agree with you that loving music does not affect the person you are. My husband is a smart Physicist with a PhD and as a teenager he was very into punk and lots of alternative music with questionable lyrics! He even had his own radio show in high school! He is a very respectable citizen now ;)

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C.O.

answers from Minneapolis on

They listen to whatever I'm listening to, which is mostly the radio and a lot of pop music. They both have MP3 players. My youngest, she's almost 4 loves Taylor Swift and she has that on her MP3 player along with some kid CDs. My oldest is almost 7 and loves Linkin Park. I just get him the edited version that has no swearing. We also have a few soundtracks for kid movies.

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M.P.

answers from Lafayette on

our children mostly listen to kids music when with us. when they are with their other parents (both of us have children from previous relationships) the boys listen to christian music with their mom, and i have no clue what my daughter listens to, i'm guessing the who and stuff like that cause its what her father likes. While in the car we have serius xm radio so we listen to a lot of the kids place live. but my fiance will also put it on the baseball station and listen to baseball talk radio. we really try to stay away from teh inappropriate stuff. but honestly their favorite band (all three kids) is AC/DC. TNT was the first thing my fiance and his children taught my daughter. its so cute when they all sing it. The 7 year old can sing it all the way through.

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E.T.

answers from Denver on

My children listen to what I listen too. I tried to have them listen to small children music, but they don't like it. I tried to have my daughter watch Baby Einsteins-- she was bored and much more preferred America's Next Top Model. My 4 year old has ALWAYS wanted something with a beat, even when she was a newborn. Her favorite song when she was a year old-- Ramalama by Rosian Murphy. She also likes Kanye West and Mumford and Sons. I mostly listen to pop, country, and some hip hop, but no rap, mostly what you can dance and sing to (we LOVE Glee) and I don't listen to the songs with profanity (for the most part), but she does know the words to Katy Perry, Taylor Swift and Lady Gaga. She doesn't like normal lullabies, she says they're boring. She likes Cat Stevens and The Beatles and Michael Jackson and Garth Brooks. DH sings her patriotic songs as lullabies (America the Beautiful, etc).

I agree that music/movies don't shape a person and there are somethings I put my foot down with, ie gore and sex, but there is as much fighting in some Disney movies as there are on NCIS-- um, the voodoo guy on Princess and a Frog freaked me out! My husband is also a Marine, so profanity, guns, death and war were never going to be kept out of her life, and we've explained to her what Daddy does for a living and she knows not to say the "grown up" words.

That being said, she also likes Disney and Dinosaur Train and ballet classes and she is a sweet caring little girl (diva) who gives her 2yr old brother kisses because she loves him. I think that the problems of music/movie exposure come when the parents are not there or unaware or unwilling to explain what they are hearing/seeing to their children. In the end it all comes back to the parents, and if some parents don't want their children to listen to Pink or Bruno Mars, then that is there decision and I absolutely respect that, but if you are going to let your child watch R rated movies and dirty rap music, you had better be there when your child has questions.

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D.S.

answers from Houston on

I agree with you i dont censor either my oldest is fine and doesnt do what the music says he is taught to be independent and think for himself

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K.P.

answers from New York on

My guy is still little, so we listen to Bubble Guppies, but I agree with you. If you are monitoring what your children are doing, buying, wearing etc in general then the music choice is one small component.

If the hardcore rap music leads to your child making choices that you do not support, then you address the choices and behavior problem and take away the music if it's contributing. You are setting an example for your children about the "okay" uses and ways to experience different forms of music, which is great! Just don't forget that there are other really beautiful options too like classical, blue grass and instrumental!

My 8 yr old niece has serious "Bieber Fever" and it's not as bad as I thought. It's not on my iPod, but she can turn it on in my car when I have her with me.

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T.K.

answers from Dallas on

I dont mind pop, but I try to limit the hiphop they listen to. I like it and my husband loves it. But, I don't want my kids popping off at church with some of those lyrics! Even thought they dont know what's being said, they shouldn't repeat it.
At thier tiny age it doesn't worry me as much as it does for preteen, young adolescent boys and girls. They definately know what's being said. 98% of all rap songs glorify a stripper - it's the only person acceptable to profess love to in that genre! Even R&B love songs are often sung to girls that get down low and dance on a pole. It's all massochistic and belittling to women. It gives an inaccurate world view. I dont want my daughter thinking that's the way the world is. I don't want her thinking that's what passes as love and that she has to emmulate that behavior to be loved. I sure dont want my son treating women like that. SO, I love me some JAY-Z, but I am really careful which songs I let them hear.

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M.M.

answers from Bellingham on

My DS is 12mo, and we listen to all kinds of things. From Fall Out Boy to Rihanna. : ) Although he really likes Jack Johnson and They Might Be Giants. His daddy loves metal and trance, so he listens to that frequently. As he gets older he will probably continue to listen to a wide variety of stuff. But I will definitely restrict some lyrical content while he is in those years where they repeat things randomly to strangers... : ) As far as when he's a teen, (say 15 and up), I don't care. He will be mature enough then to listen to what he wants. DH and I listened to all kinds of crazy sh*t as teens, and we are pretty upstanding citizens. : D

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D.B.

answers from Charlotte on

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