My 11 Year Old

Updated on May 10, 2013
D.C. asks from San Francisco, CA
14 answers

i was wondering if anyone has the same problem. I have an 11 year old boy who will forget to put pants on, who forgets to wash in the bath and has to be sent back,who forgets to wipe after going to the toilet. He also will wear clothes that are to small and not even notice that they are to tight. i have tried resurching this but have got no where anyone else have this problem please advice would be great

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So What Happened?

I'm not privy to his bathroom habits but I do wash his underwear and I meant forgets underwear not pants. I have an older child and never had any of these things with him and I don't have any of this trouble with my 7 year old it just seems odd to me

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C.W.

answers from Indianapolis on

Sounds perfectly normal be it boy or girl, I think boys are more prone to all this. As my husband and I joke around cause he grew up with all boys...boys are just gross and don't care.

He's still at that age, that if he's starting to get into girls, it still isn't registering with him that girls like clean, not gross boys. Just keep reminding him and it will get better.

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A.S.

answers from Boca Raton on

In my experience when boys discover girls they discover hygiene.

JMO.

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A.L.

answers from Las Vegas on

Some does sound about right.. I tell my son all the time... TIME for your bath... FINALLY when he takes it... I say, did you wash "everything" yes.. :) everything I ask???? yes.......... I do a check.. NOPE..... hey, you didn't wash everything.............. his reply, Oh I didn't know...
Goes to the bathroom..... did you clean well? yes I did.. Are you sure?? yes.... Ok .... then later on, I see him walking kinda funny.. so I check... NOPE... not quite ...
I say.. Isn't that shirt a bit tight??? NO... Looks tight to me.. NO..

Then, You've outgrown those pants, I am going to donate them... Why not put on the ones that are longer... "because I like these"..............
sigh... Yep... sounds right to me..

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J.B.

answers from Boston on

Um...what? I have two 15-year-olds and none of that sounds normal for when they were 11. How would you know if he forgot to wipe after toileting? I haven't been privy to my children's bathroom habits since they were potty trained.

And forgets to put on pants? As in gets dressed in the morning and comes out wearing just underwear? Never.

I can see the clothes that are too small...sounds like it's going to be your job to weed out the wardrobe for a while longer. But the rest of it doesn't sound typical to me. I'm still trying to figure out how you know whether or not he wipes when using the bathroom...

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K.S.

answers from Miami on

Mine doesnt have a problem with the pants but I tell you what you still have to ask them like 5 times. My favorite and most annoying response is ok mom in a minute. And an hour later its probably not done. I think its the hormones in their system.

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A.B.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Sounds just like my 11 year old son to the T. I also cannot have the TV on when he is told to do something or he stops and stares at it and completely forgets what he was doing.
I think this is normal as they go through puberty. If your son is growing at the rate mine is, the clothes situation could be, hey these clothes just fit a few weeks ago. In the last 6 months my son has gone up two jean sizes, grown a size in shoes and all the clothes that were bought big in September are not even close to fitting him now.
I know it is a pain but the only thing I have found that works is to constantly remind him and be on him day to day. He gets irritated but like I tell him, when he starts doing it on his own with out being told more than twice I will lay off.

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B..

answers from Dallas on

Ha! Nobody has found a cure for that! Normal.

I used to wonder if my son daydreamed in the shower till the water ran cold and then washed!

It's the age and it doesn't quit till a girl his age complains. Usually about 15.

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C.M.

answers from Chicago on

Sounds like my 11-year old girl! She walks around in a daze and has to be forced to shower! Once in the shower she's lazy and sometimes "forgets" to wash her hair or her lady bits. She got an infection and it was from not washing her lady bits! She had stuff stuck to them, I almost puked when the doctor told us. We felt like terrible parents, but who thinks to check with an 11-year old?

She also wears too-small clothes or too large things without even noticing. I'm sure once she discovers boys that will all change!

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V.P.

answers from Columbus on

Sounds like my 11 year old girl and most of her friends.

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P.G.

answers from Dallas on

It's called pruning - at his age, the brain goes through a cycle where it dumps some synapses and their brain literally changes. Maybe have a check-up at the ped just to be sure it's not more, but adolescence is like reverse menopause for some kids.

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€.$.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi there,

We have some of the same issues with my 6 year old- especially the wiping. I tried lots of things- showing him the undies with streaks, making the connection to poor hygiene and itching, punishment, and steps: "wipe, flush, and wash!" He's finally getting a handle on it after 3 months of intense work.

I truly think children just love to be taken care of and/or can be intimidated of all the attention to detail that they need.

Best of luck and wishing you loads of patience.

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B.H.

answers from Dallas on

Gah! Sounds like my boy. He just doesn't seem to care...

I explained to my son that kids will make fun of him and not want to be around him if he's the "smelly kid".

I'm hoping that developing an interest in girls will solve the problem -- SOON!

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C.B.

answers from San Francisco on

Sounds like he's moving a bit too fast and some of the "details" get missed. You could put up some sort of a chart to remind him what articles of clothing to put on; to wipe after going poo; to wash in the bathtub.

As for the clothes, it will be up to you to go through his drawers and take out the ones that are too small for a couple more years.

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P.K.

answers from New York on

Sounds pretty normal to me. Gotta love boys. Then at one point they are in the shower forever and spend more time primping than any girl!

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