All responses are thoughtful and good. That kids are beginning to be autonomous is a good point. Often electric brushes are efficient and fast. Most are too noisy for little ones. My favorite for children, though pricy, is the Rotadent, available through some dentists... Just checked - they're also available at Amazon. It's almost silent and the bristles are very soft. If used right (and I noticed they have good pictures on their website - use the flat brush.) the bristles splay under the gums. That's important.
Whether electric, or manual, kids often do better without toothpaste when the adult brushes. With my children, I let them brush with a manual brush first (to give them the "I can do it!" positive feeling.) I always gave them a choice if they wanted to use toothpaste or not. Always use a non-fluoride toothpaste for little ones. It's been proven they swallow about 40% of toothpaste and a CDC report from 3/06, was the basis for the ADA recommendation that formula should not be mixed with fluoridated water for children under the age of one.. (Note: most bottled water is fluoridated. In 40 states, one can order or find Sparkletts, which doesn't have fluoride unless you request it. By the way, this same CDC report noted that at least 22% of all children, up to 69% in high socio-economic class areas who fluoridate, have dental fluorisis. Think of teeth as the canary in the coal mine. The same CDC report stated that a 110 lb. adult drinking 2 liters of water a day is getting between120%-605% more than “optimal recommended exposure" because it's in processed foods, pesticides, dental products, etc. Grape juice for instance can have 6ppm+. This is 6X the optimal dose set ofor a 110 pound adult drinking only one liter of water/day and having no other sources of fluoride. It must be noted that many scientists are in disagreement about the 1ppm level “ideal” rate and that fluoride sources for all of us have exponentially increased.)
Off my band box: plaque is removed by mechanical, not chemical action. After my kids brush by themselves with a manual brush, I do "double-check". They lie back on their bed with their mouth open as though they are at the dentist. When things are running more smoothly, always remind them to close down a bit while you brush the outside back teeth to relax their main chewing muscle. This gives them more room for a comfortable brush fit. (Read them a dental children's book if you haven't yet. This helps with the modeling...) A quick run with the electric brush and no toothpaste while singing or lightly commenting about whatever - "Oh! Here's a little piece of (whatever was eaten that day...)" And model always. I always let my children watch me brush and floss. They want to be just like us. My children began flossing when they were two. Not well, mind you, but I let them do what they could. Habit forming is critical.. As they relaxed into the toothbrushing routine with my help, they also let me floss for them.
Just a thought, I hated to push my children and form oral aversions. I wonder if you should not push it for a couple of days - maybe just give her her brush without comment while you brush and floss and see what happens. When my children got older, I gave them their brush and a flosser to use while I read to them. They spent a lot more time at home care than they otherwise would have!
Yours in health,
RDH/dental hygienist