My 2-Year Old Is Waking Twice a Night!

We went through that as well - try putting some books in her bed and a night light so she can see. See if she can "read" herself back to sleep. Good Luck!

My son has always had night wakings, night terrors, talking and now in a big bed we worry about walking because he would stand and walk around his crib w/night terrors. We have found that a homeopathic remedy called calms forte is helpful. you can get it at healthfood stores...maybe even walgreens or something. they are little tiny tablets that disolve under the tongue. It has helped us a lot...the wakings are less, shorter, and he goes right back to sleep. Good luck!

I am in exactly the same boat. I would love to hear advice others have. We have tried everything. Going to bed is not a problem as long as the nap isn't more than 45 minutes, but it is the staying in bed all night that we can't master. We tried the marching back to bed without talking to her or saying anything. One night it was up to 175 trips. Seriously! She can outlast us. Now to add to the problem, she is waking my 6 month old who has potential to be a good sleeper. And to make matters even more complicated I am usually home alone with them both. I just wanted you to know that you are not alone.

M., you poor girl..The only thing i can wonder, is she potty trained? Is she waking wet? Maybe she is needing to potty when she wakes or has just wet..THe timing might be about right? Anything new in that area? That is the only idea i have right off the top of my head..

Good luck

C

If you are concerned she is hungry, try leaving a sippy of water nearby. It won't harm her teeth and still fills her tummy a bit. Works great for my 2 year old.

Hi M.,

My daughter, who is now 6, didn't sleep through the night until she was 4. When she was a baby (0-10 months) she would wake up to eat every 2 hours. Then from 10 months until 4 she would wake up 2 to 3 times a night. I thought I was going to die from sleep deprivation. Now she sleeps like a log for 10 hours. The Pattern you need to change is bringing her into your bed. I know it will be hell to do this, but it will work. When she wakes up, do not let her sleep in your bed. She now knows that if she cries long enough you will give up. Now you have to stick to your guns & keep putting her back into her bed. Even if she gets out 100 times, cries for 2 hours & loud enough to wake the neighbors, keep putting her back in her bed. If she is like most 2 year olds this will work after 2 to 3 nights of pure & utter hell. If she is strong willed like mine, it will take 4 to 6 nights of pure & utter hell. I assure you that this will work, if you don't give up. Good luck.

I would be curious to see what others say, because I am going through the same thing. I get to the point where I just give in to letting her sleep in our bed as well, since I am so exhausted.

Yikes!!! I'm so sorry you have to go through that every night! At this point it really is a behavioral thing and not a sleeping issue. Two year olds like to be in charge and she is SO in charge during the night. Can you put her back in a crib or a pack and play for a while (one week?). It really could clear up that quickly if you let her cry it out. We had to with my son and I have to tell you it SUCKED! for two nights he cried for more than an hour in his room while I cried for that same hour in my room. We were determined to be stronger than him and in the end he quit doing it.

I would tell him when I would put him to bed "Mommy isn't going to come in tonight when you cry. I'll see you in the morning." I of course told him I loved him and all of that and the first time he cried I stuck my head in his room and reminded him that I wasn't going to tuck him in again. I never went back in his room again.

After the first two days of more than an hour crying he cried for about 15 minutes. The next day 5. The next day about 30 seconds. Now, one year later, if he cries it's becuase something is really wrong (fever or something) and I rush right in.

Quick side note... my 5 year old daughter only woke up the first night he cried. The following nights she slept right through it. Go figure.

Good luck! This is so not easy!

We seem to have the same story! My 5 year old for the most part has always slept well and my 2 year old has recently started waking. He is still in a crib and doesn't really try to get out but yells and cries from his room until I come in. He still naps and seems to need it. So what my husband and I have tried when he awakes at night is instead of bringing him to our room, one of us grabs our pillow and lays on his floor until he falls back to sleep. Many nights of this was hard too but it seems to have helped. Now he is back to waking occasionally and just going to his room and consoling him (without removing him from his crib) is working. We don't have to sleep on his floor anymore! My feeling is that he may have been starting to dream and then waking up. It can be a guessing game to try and figure out what is bothering them. But hopefully this to will pass! Good Luck!

My 2 year old daughter did the same thing. I started talking to her in the daytime when she was calm about how if she went the whole night without coming in Mommy & Daddy's room, she got to wear lipstick the next day. She and I wnt to Walgreen's and picked out her shade, but didn't put it on. That night she cried and came into our room. The first thing I said, in a disappointed voice was, "Oh no, no lipstick tomorrow". She didn't come in a 2nd time. The next day I showed her the lipstick and said, "I kniw you'll get to wear it tomorrow". She did. She has come back into our room since then and then tried to convince me in the morning that she didn't so that she could wear lipstick, but I stick to my guns. She looks hilarious but I'll paint up like a clown to get a good night's sleep. Good Luck!

I would def. try the super nanny method. It worked wonderful on my going to be 2 year old little boy. When he would wake up and want us to pick him up, we would lie there in his floor with a blanket. We would comfort him the first night or so by singing. Then after that, we would just remain quiet and act like we were sleeping. We would not pick him up or allow him to sleep with us on the floor. By the third night of doing this, he realized that his room is where he goes night night, and that we would be there to comfort him...in his room. He goes down by himself now at 8-8:30, and sleeps through the night...unless he is sick or something and that's a different situation. If she sleeps in a big girl bed, which my son doesn't yet, then you may even have to continue to put her in her bed again and again the first night or so while you are in there, until she understands that she has to sleep in her big girl bed. I know for my older son, who is now 41/2, when he started to want to sleep in our bed, we went and bought him new special blankets for his big boy bed and let him pick them out. We explained the reason why we are buying them is because his bed is special and we want him to feel comfortable in it. Maybe try that with her and see what works. Sometimes when we make a big deal out of something and stress how special it is, it is magical.

Good luck!

Crystal
Plainfield

Hi M., it looks like your smart 2 year old has you trained! they have a tenency to do that. I think that when he wakes up the second time you have to stay in his bed with him for a few nights..never take him to yours or he will forever want to go there. I had 3 children and now I am a grandmother, they all came to our bed and sometimes my husband and I had to go and sleep in my daughters bed, my oldest when told he was now too big and did't fit, the next day came with the perfect solution..why not have a bed made that goes from one wall to the other, then we all will fit!
You have to be fast and cut it out right now, even if it takes you sleeping there in his bed for a week.
Good luck...remember they are trying you out
Pat

my daughter is almost five and i have been fighting the same issues. the best thing i have come up with is night terrors. the only comfort i gain is it will be outgrown. things have gotten better. she still has them but not every night. the best thing i have found is schedule. make sure she has a good one with enough sleep. we found that not enough sleep equaled a bad night. make sure the nap is early enough for a good bedtime. we found it was always worse when too much action and stimulation occurred during the day. i feel your pain. i think it is all something at birth too. my daughter didn't sleep thru the night until 1. and before that she would get up every 2 to 3 hours. and she was colicy for 1 year. needless to say hang in there. it will get better. good luck.

Hey M.,
Just keep letting the child cry and don`t give in and don`t
go get her. if she comes to u like she finally does, just
keep putting her back in bed as many times as it takes
each night. might take a long time, but she should finally
give in and realize she has to stay in her bad and
finally just sleep. Of course you should check on her the
first time she starts to cry and several times
throughout to make sure she isn`t wet,choking or anything
like a fever or anything. Good idea to check some things
before layiing her down.
Good luck. She doesn`t have colic does she? There isn`t anything to do for that, but let the child cry.
Sinerely,
A.

Hi there....I can relate...we had problems with our first child and sleeping. It was awful...sleep deprivation is no fun! We read books, talked to our docs, friends, family anyone who would listen! The thing that worked for us(after trying everything else we could)...we had to be TOUGH(me,not so good at-my husband, much better) and just let the poor kid cry it out. It took 3 nites, but it WORKED!!!We did it gradually...we would go to the door every 15minutes...then every half hour..then every hour. We would say in a serious voice"It's time for bed." No snuggling, no touching..nothing. Just said what we had to say and walked away from the door.This part may sound strange and drastic as well,but we also cut half of his bedroom door off..the top half. That way we could lock the bottom half but he could see that the door was open. This was a drastic step...a friend of ours did this and it worked with the Ferber method I described above. I know it sounds rough and I did not want to do it...but it was our last resort and it did work.Our son is a well adjusted, well rested 8 year old now:)

You could also try getting those Disney blinds with her favorite Disney characters..that might help. Or a "fake" fish tank..very calming or even a spring/babbling brook sound machine.Everything is worth a try to get some sleep..for all of you! I truly hope this helps...take care.
B.

You are not alone! My son just turned 4 years and is a very well behaved child who is devloping very well at his preschool program (3 days a week). He has always woken up 1-2 times a night and still wakes up about 95% of the time. We tried all of the things others have mentioned including the tough love approach (yes, that is rough but often works for many people I have talked to.) We also received some good advise from a few doctors: no stimulating tv or toys in the evening. Also no sugar in snacks or drinks. With no nap and no sugar and less stimulation, his sleeping has improved but never consistent. We also reward him if he has consistent good night's sleep in his own bed. This helps to get him to walk back to his bed on his own and then he really tries to fall back asleep. It helps with the "fight" of "but I want to come sleep in your bed mommy". he is starting to also understand that if he wants to be a big boy and do big boy things, then he needs to rest at night. He also asks if his friends in the neighborhood are sleeping and of course the answer is yes.
He is so disciplined and well behaved about so many things so it is difficult to understand the constant battle with sleeping we still have.In our case, we found out through testing that our son's dopamine level was so low, that his body was "always on".
We tried a natural supplement recommended by a specialist. I have since removed it and no change either way for us but I believe it works for some.
Honestly, the best night's sleep we all get is if my son stays up later and has had no nap. I also find if I stay with him and help him take a few deep breaths to relax it really helps him. I often tell him to close his eyes and let him know I'll check back to see if he fell asleep. then he's out cold a few minutes later.
All the little things I mentioned within above help us some; hope some of this might help you too.

M.,

It sounds like your 2-year old is at the "testing you" age. They seem to try at that age to see what they can get away with and often it works ;-) Unfortunately, the seeds you plant today will turn into what blooms in the future. I have been there and done that but it isn't easy. I would suggest you go back to letting her cry it out some in her own bed. Just be firm and not give in. You can console but don't pick up and remove from the room. It will be exhausting and may take many night but it will be worth it if it works! Just choose small amounts of time in the beginning to go in and console and keep increasing them. (Oh, and get some ear plugs for the rest of the family!)

Best wishes!

I learned a little trick from Super Nanny and in my experience it really works. It is a little rough at first but it is worth it. First make bed time relaxing and start winding down about an hour before bed time. Then put her to bed and say goodnight, give kisses, hugs whatever, but don't linger. The first time she gets up just put her right back down say good night again and leave the room. The less interaction the better. If she gets up again try putting her back in her bed, NO interaction, do talk to her or look at her. Sit down by her bed and just look any where but at her but be still. If she is still crying that is fine, just don not talk to her or look at her. She will adventually calm her self down when she sees you are sttill there. If while tou are in the room, she gets out of bed, keep putting her back but NO interaction. DO not lay with her, don't touch her or talk to her. That will be pacifing her and is not doing her any good. I can not stress enough about the no interaction to be CONSISTANT. This may take a week or two and my be really hard (emotionally) on you and her but ther eis a big pay off in the end. SLEEP for both of you and she will learn that getting up at night is not going to get her anywhere. I have used this method on two kids and offered this advice to many and it has worked for almost every one. It is hard, becuase you want to console and comfort, but try not to nad again BE CONSISTANT and don't give up. GOOD LUCK!

This Homeopathic sleep remedy is natural w/ no side effects. I have used this when my daughter and son have had rough nights of sleeping and it helps them get back to sleep. Then they start to sleep well again.
http://www.hylands.com/products/calmsforte.php

You can get it at Dominicks or Jewel in the natural foods section. Also at Whole Foods or Fruitful Yield natural foods stores.

We had the same problem with my son. It started for us shortly after we put him in his toddler bed. While it is not all better yet, we have gotten to a place where he does go right back to bed without the crying. I was putting him in bed with us for awhile, but then I realized that I could not continue doing that. I was not sleeping well and then my son was up when my husband got up at 5:30 for work. I talked to him every time he woke up about it not being morning yet and that he had to sleep in his bed like a big boy. I made sure he had his stuffed animals and security blanket and tucked him back in. He has started coming in after my husband gets up and going back to sleep with me then, but that is ok because he uses my husband's pillow! I have always gotten up when the kids get up, so that is not an issue with me. I hope you figure it out soon!

What time does you little girl get up in the morning and what time does she go to sleep? My boys went to bed at 8pm and were up by 5:30 or 6am every day. They could take a nap from 12p to 3p but rarely slept that long. But if they didn't take their nap before 3p that day I did not let them sleep until bedtime at 8p. I know it sounds terrible but you will have to insist that she sleeps in her own bed or you could end up with her sleeping with you til she's 12. My 4 boys thought it was ok to sleep in my bed even to the point of chasing Daddy out but I finally put a stop to it when they were 4,3 and 1 because it was rediculous that I couldn't sleep with my husband in our own bed. I know that it is easier said than done but you will have to do it eventually. What helped with my boys was getting a story book out and reading in a calm and steady voice so that they were lulled back to sleep. And you could try turning on a radio to a classical, easy listening or even a Country station so long as it is turned down low and then when you stop reading she will still hear the radio and that may help her sleep through the night.
Is it possible that she is having nightmares or that a sound is waking her up in the night? Nightmares and fears need to be confronted. With my boys,after we moved to a new house they started having nightmares about the boogey man. I told them that their Daddy and Uncle had gone hunting the monsters, they refused to believe that monsters did not exist, and had chased them all out of town and that they had scared the monsters so bad that they would never come back into town again. It worked and they even went to pre-school and told their friends that there was nothing to be afraid of anymore.
Regardless, you will have to push yourself and your daughter to keep her in her own bed, and it won't be easy. But all will be happier in the long run. Hope this helps.

This website has a lot of good ideas for sleep problems...

http://www.askdrsears.com/html/7/T070100.asp

I applaud your not wanting to use the cry-it-out ideas. I think those babies just learn to grieve their loneliness quietly, which seems so sad to me. But I do understand needing more sleep, so I hope that you find some ideas there that will help you.

Also, I think that the bedtime snack idea is a good one. One thing that might help there is to not use any snacks that have sugar in them, but do have protein--like cheese sticks, milk, ham sandwich, etc. Sometimes low blood sugar wakes people up. Protein helps to keep the blood sugar steady. Sugar, on the other hand, gives you a blood sugar peak and then a blood sugar valley when the insulin kicks in and does its job--and that's what wakes one up.

Best wishes.

I had this same problem about 2 years ago. My daughter (first born) slept 10 hrs a night from 6mos old until now. She will actually sleep much longer if i let her. She has no problem falling asleep even when she says she isn't tired. But my son who is now 4 has had sleep issues since birth. When i had him at the hospital he would not go to sleep and couldn't be consoled. Didn't have colic either, but just was very fussy. And when he was about 2 or so he would wake up 3 and 4 times a night. Thank goodness his sister is a heavy sleeper because he cried alot and i would try everything to put him back to bed. We just continue with our routine and he finally gave up and stayed asleep most of the night. I rubbed his back when he woke and if that didn't help i would sleep in his bed or my husband would lay with him until he fell asleep then retreat back to our own room. It is very trying but eventually your daughter will get the hint.....if you let her get in bed with you, she will purposely wake up to get you to give in. good luck !

We had a similar problem when our daughter switched to a big girl bed. With her newly found freedom, she just would not stay down. Sleep was boring! We had to put a gate in her doorway at night, which we told her was for her safety. This was true--we didn't want a toddler wandering around the house in the dark, tripping on the stairs or getting into things while we were asleep. She screamed and cried and fell asleep on her floor the first couple of nights, which was very difficult for all of us, but after that, she decided it was easier to just go to bed. Eventually, she got so used to the gate that she asked us to put it up if we forgot.

M., I'm sorry to hear you're having such a stressful time on a nightly basis. I wish I could be more help to you here, but my only idea or suggestion is to purchase one or both of Super Nanny's books. Perhaps, in one of those, you could find more comfort and problem-solving advice. Good luck!!! (Rest whenever you can until you can get back to peaceful sleep!)

You have received some good advice but before taking any of it, ask your pediatrician and be sure that nothing is physically wrong with your child. IT would be negligent to let her "cry it out" if something were going on that were far more serious than a controlling two year old's attention seeking/manipulation. Often times, during growth spurts and developmental milestones, toddlers will wake several times during the night and/or revert to more infantile behavior. They need your love and comforting more than ever and it will pass. By the way, I probably haven;t slept for more than 3 consecutive hours for the past several months due to my two year olds wake ups (caused by family stress, ear infections, the flu, you name it...) but I have faith it will pass and I guess this is what motherhood is all about. You are not alone.

Rather than bring her to your bed, I would sleep in HER room with her until she falls back asleep...on the floor if you have to. Once they get into your bed, it's hard to get them out! My daughter was the same....almost exactly the same scenario...including the not-sleeping-through-the-night until one year old. It stinks to sleep on the floor, but it stinks more to have her in your bed all night and when you are trying to start your day.

We also ran into the same issue with napping. If she took a nap, it messed up bedtime, but if she didn't take a nap, she's a monster. We started putting her to bed at 7:30 when she was three (starting our routine at 7:00 so she was "out" by 7:30) and not giving her a nap. That seemed to fix a lot of the problems. Starting the bedtime routine at 7:00 seemed sooooo early, but it works for her. (We had been putting her to bed at 8:30)