My 22 Month Old Is Barely Speaking

Updated on February 20, 2008
J.R. asks from Albuquerque, NM
34 answers

I have a 4 yr old daughter that said her first word at 9 months & knew her phonics by 2. I know this is advanced & I know that boys & 2nd children & children in general are ALL different, but I'm just getting kinda nervous. He definitely understands what we're saying. He says Mommy plain as day (of course) & he's saying animal sounds - like Moo & Arf. And he has a few other words that only US would understand & most of the time - for us to understand - it needs to be in context. He opens his mouth & says "aaaaaahhh" for a long time to tell us a story. He goes for his 2 year in a couple months, but I know that the sooner the better for any speech problems. Is this REALLY normal - or should I call the dr?

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So What Happened?

Thanks everyone for your help. I'll get his hearing tested at his next appt as he has had quite a few ear infections, & until then we'll work on stimulating him more to repeat things after us.

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D.K.

answers from Phoenix on

Hi J.. Let me start by saying that I am a speech pathologist that specializes in children birth through 7 years of age. I have 13 years experience. I have 2 children: a soon to be 4 year old girl and an almost 2 year old boy. Sound familiar?? My first question to you is, is he imitating you at all? Attemting, even if it's not perfect? That's a good key here. Also, does he put ANY 2 words together? Like, cat-meow, or truck, beep or anything. That's another key here. Two year olds TYPICALLY will put 2 words together. Also, how many words does he have? Ten, twenty, thirty? He should have about 50 by now that he uses spontaneously. That said, if he doesn't have that many don't get alarmed yet. It's more important that he's trying to imitate what you say. I don't care much HOW it sounds as long as he's trying. Another good predictor is how many consonant and vowel sounds he has in his repertoire. Like can he only say, /b/, /p/ and /m/ sounds and only says the /ah/ vowel. If he has a limited repertoire of sounds then you may want to get him tested. If not, then he's probably just a late bloomer and you have nothing to worry about. You can email me if you'd like if you have more questions...my email is ____@____.com I've helped!

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M.T.

answers from Flagstaff on

My son didn't speak until he was 3 1/2 because his sisters said everything for him! However my nephew had trouble being understood and didn't speak until late. He was 6 before they found out he had a wax problem in his ears and had to get tubes... but within about a month huis speech cleared up. Talk to an audiologist.

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M.B.

answers from Flagstaff on

It may not be too big a problem at all.. My parents said I didn't start speaking until I was three and part of the reason was because I had a brother two years older than me. If my parents could'nt understand, he would.

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E.M.

answers from Phoenix on

I am a 25th year Speech and Language Pathologist, working in a private school environment, and have worked with preschoolers all the way up. I also have 4 children of my own, ranging in age from 15 down to almost 8. My suggestion would be first, have his hearing checked at your next dr. visit. If that is fine, I would try to stimulate his speech as much as you can by reading picture books-especially ones with a lot of repetition of context that he can attempt to imitate. Music (like Raffi, and other great children's music) will also help. Sing as many kids tunes as you can...especially in the car... we spend a lot of time there, and this can be a great way to make that car ride stimulating for language... so much better than watching movies in the car!!! I really worry about all the toddlers who aren't getting music stimulation in the car anymore since so many cars have t.v.'s now. Watch, also, that your daughter is not speaking for him; and as a second child watch how much you give into his crying or screaming to get what he wants... try to get him to use words to get what he wants by modeling the words first, then having him attempt to imitate them. Give him mega praise at every attempt!!! There are all kinds of websites on speech/language development that have tons of ideas on games you can play to stimulate language and speech development. I wouldn't get scared yet... he's still so young. My 4th child didn't start speaking until she was three... I was really watching out for the siblings to make sure they weren't giving in to her or speaking for her. But it turned out with her, she was Miss Independent, and would just pull a chair over to the cupboard to get what she wanted instead of trying to communicate. As we have more children, our lives get busier, and we give in faster, and just fulfill their needs faster. Also, as we have more kids, we have less time to spend reading books to them and playing language-stimulating games. If you have concerns, really focus on this. As you get closer to 3 years old (usually 2.9), you can have free testing by your public school district, and if he qualifies for speech therapy, you can get it free (your tax dollars at work), either through an itinerant program to address simple articulation delays (speech sounds), or a preschool classroom program for more involved language therapy. And, you do have to watch out for comparing second child to first child, and boys to girls! Boys often are much more interested in developing their gross motor skills and girls are more interested in speech. But, eventually they balance out. My feeling is, don't worry yet... you have time.
E. M.

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A.P.

answers from Phoenix on

Do yourself a favor and bypass your doctor. My doc told me my son was fine, but when I took him to early intervention to be evaluated by a speech pathologist, he was diagnosed with a speech delay just before his second birthday. By his third b-day, he tested out of the program ABOVE his age level!!! We had an awesome speech pathologist! It was so worth it, and we didn't pay a dime. That was in NV, and I don't know how it works here in AZ. It's worth a call if for nothing else but peace of mind for you. I was so frustrated being unable to communicate with him, and now (at 5) life is so much easier. Many people discouraged me from having him evaluated--they kept sayhing he would grow out of it. Don't listen to this advice. This is your child...what if he doesn't grow out of it??? Sorry, just my opinion here, but I think an evaluation would make you feel so much better either way. In the meantime, have you tried sign language? "Signing Times" is a great one.

Good luck,
A.

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K.S.

answers from Phoenix on

If I were in the same position I would talk with my doctor. Then see if you can get a recomendation for a specialist if necessary. It could be nothing or it could be something..and you are right, earlier is always better. I always feel, in the case of children, it is ALWAYS better to err on the side of caution.
Good luck!

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Z.P.

answers from Phoenix on

I have two daughters that were early talkers. My oldest was reading before she was three! So when my son was NOT talking I worried. I brought it up at every well baby check and was continually told it was normal becuase older siblings do the talking for him blah blah blah. FINALLY we found out that he had been having ear infections that we didn't detect because he has such a high pain tolerance and didn't clue us in. In fact he never even acted sick at all. These infections effected his hearing durring the time he was learning to process speech. This caused him to talk like a deaf person. Although his hearing is fine, his speech is NOT fine. Now he is 2 1/2 and all though he tries very hard to talk, no one understands him. I wish I would have pushed the issue way back when. Follow your gut. If you think something is wrong, find help!

There is a program called AZIEP. Its Arizona Early Intervention Program. They offer help to children under three who are significantly delayed in speech or other areas. The best part is its FREE. We got a referal from our doctor. Its time consuming. About a month after the referal someone called us and did an over the phone evaluation. Then she made an appt for an in home evaluation. It took another month for them to come out and evaluate him. Then someone else had to come out and evaluate him again. Then a month later they came out and filled out a IFSP... individualized family service plan. Now we are just waiting for my son to be assigned a speech therapist. They said it would take about 30 days for that. But once we are assigned a therapist she or he will come to our house once a week to work with our son. It takes a lot of time and patience, but I am thinking its worth it! Even if he only gets 5 months of therapy. That is still 5 months!
Ask your doctor for a referal if you feel you need it. I agree with you that early help is good. He may out grow it on his own, but wouldn't it suck if he didn't and it effected him when he was starting school?
Good Luck!

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K.K.

answers from Phoenix on

J.~I have a 7 year old boy, an almost 4 years old boy and a 19 month old girl. Basically, neither of my boys talked other than mama, dada, and baby babble until after they were 2 years old. Once they started talking, the words came quickly, 2 word sentences, 3 word sentences and so on. Both of them are very articulate now! My 19 month old daughter already says 1000 words!! We girls get to talkin' quick and don't ever stop!! All that to say you probably have nothing to worry about! All the best to you, K. from Chandler

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J.M.

answers from Phoenix on

I had a similar problem with my two oldest boys. My eldest, now 11, and his younger brother are 21mo apart. The older spoke very early and was speaking in sentences before he turned 1. Very advanced. The second seamed to have his own language that only he and his brother could understand. It became very frustrating because we couldn't understand even simple things like him asking for milk. Anyhow - We had a friend that was psychologist for a special education pre-school and talked to her about the problem. She said it is commonly referred to as, Second Child Syndrome. The oldest child speaks for the younger and the younger ends up not learning to annunciate and speak properly. We were told all we really needed to do was split them up. She suggested that we put the younger into her program at the school as a peer pal (he does not and did not have a learning disability). He began speaking more and clearly after a few short weeks. They were only separated for a couple of hours per day and it made a world of difference. It also helped prepare him for kindergarten. I hope this helps.

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C.R.

answers from Las Cruces on

Boys do tend to do things later and in a different way than girls. As a former teacher of older toddlers (and the mother of a 20 month old son in speech therapy), a speech evaluation would be a good idea. It never hurts to get an evaluation and if it's needed, he'll get services that will help his speech develop. If the eval comes out as 'normal,' you just continue with what you are doing and you don't have that nagging doubt in the back of your mind anymore.

You should be able to contact your early intervention agency directly. Parent referral is enough to get the process started. The thing that I always tell families that I work with, and that I remind myself, is to follow your instincts. From your post, it seems like you are concerned about your child's speech development and following up on that concern will help you and your son.

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C.B.

answers from Phoenix on

I would contact Early Intervention through the Department of Developmental Disabilities. Don't let the name of the department scare you, they are just the department that provides and pays for the service. EI provides evaluations and therapies in the home or clinic for free regardless of socioeconomic status - free for all. And, you can refer yourself without the doctor. All kids do develop differently, but it is good to get evaluated to be sure nothing else is going on since he is almost 2 now. I have a 22 month old who only says a few words and she has excellent receptive language skills (understanding you) and is behind in the expressive language area. We are going to speech therapy once a week right now.

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V.J.

answers from Phoenix on

I have a 20 month old and he also does not say much. He understands most everything I say to him and he says a few words like DaDa, no, uh oh, hi, bye. I do wonder when he'll speak to me with a wider vocabulary but for now, I'm not concerned because he is normal in every other aspect. I've read that children tend to focus on learning one ability at a time rather than advancing in everything all at once. Maybe your son is just working hard to learn others skills and his speech will come next. On the other hand, nobody knows your child better than you do and if you feel that something is not quite right, then there's absolutely nothing wrong with checking in with the pediatrician. I don't think it's something you should make a special trip for since he is only 2 months away from his 2 yr checkup, but if he hasn't made progress by that time, mention it. It's better to be a little cautious and get some peace of mind.

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E.S.

answers from Phoenix on

My son had only a handful of words at his 2 yr checkup, and the doctor recommended therapy in the future if we thought that we needed to go that route. She didn't sound too worried, just that we didn't wait until he was three to start if he didn't progress. We said that we would give him 2 or 3 months. Well, we gave him the time and a couple of months later he was speaking in full sentences without any help. You just never know. He turns three in March and now he never stops talking. Good luck!

-E.

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A.S.

answers from Phoenix on

I wouldn't be worried. If you want some professional reassurance, ask your ped at the 2 yr. check up. Till then, I wouldn't stress.

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C.J.

answers from Washington DC on

my daughter is 23 months and has had some small speech delays due to chronic ear infections. the week before her scheduled early intervention evaluation she started talking but i took her anyway and i'm glad i did. they gave me some tools to help her and tested her hearing. we found out that one of her tubes that helped with the ear infections was clogged and we can fix that! down in las cruces we have 'aprendamos' with whom i have very good experiences. if they are not in albuquerque they will very likely be able to direct you to someone. ###-###-####. many second children don't talk as early because often the first born anticipates the needs of the second and may even talk for him. however, that your son is trying to talk but can't is more worrisome. this is the same thing i saw with my daughter. it's free to use these services and i highly recommend getting an evaluation. good luck!

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T.H.

answers from Phoenix on

I worried about my 2nd son at that age too. Even my sister who teaches speacial ed told me to have him tested when he was 3. I went ahead and did so and all his tests were good results. The bottom line is that each child developes differently. If you have a concern address it with his pediatrician at the regular appointments, my personal opinion and speaking from experience tells me you should not worry unless the doctor tells you too. I could have saved myself a lot of stress and worry had I not compared my son to all the other children in our lives. Each and every one is soooooooo different! By the way he is now 8, and is one of the smartest kids in the family and talks just fine. Hope this helps you.

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I.W.

answers from Phoenix on

Hi, J.~ for peace of mind or early intervention i suggest you make an appo to see his doctor. either way you will be in a place of knowledge of what to do. it's a good sign that he understands language (i have an 18 yr old autistic son and it took him years to crack the language code, but now he speaks eloquently like you and i)but perhaps all he needs is to be in a pre school setting getting a little bit of extra help via speech therapy. i did this with my 12 yr old when i noticed he didn't speak as much as i wanted him to (i was super nervous after my older son) and it helped him tremendously. he was ok, he just needed a bit of help to catch up, but again, each child is different, but it's always better to err on the side of caution.
i want to add to my story seeing that so many are telling you not to worry (their children are typical) that at the time my boy was diagnosed i had been to the pediatrician several times with my concerns and he told me i was being a nervous mother about it and that my son did not exhibit autistic behaviour, just speech delay, which in itself was not abnormal. i wanted to hurt him and that isn't a joke when i wasted more than a year before he was diagnosed by a developmental pediatrician with childhood autism. why wait? why wait 2 months? why wait at all? i listened to a lot of well-meaning advice that although well meaning... was wrong. the earliest intervention is best. he had given me false hope about my son's condition, and i dont wish that on anybody, which is why i strongly recommend if only for peace of mind you have him evaluated. time is precious for development and early intervention.

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J.A.

answers from Phoenix on

HI Jennnifer,
I am a speech therapist and mother of 3. It really is difficult when each child is so unique and just when you think you have it figured out with the oldest the next one does something completely different. That leaves you wondering what's going on.
From a speech point-of-view I am encouraged to hear that he understands what you are saying. That's very important! You might want to double check that he can at least point to some familiar objects and pictures when named and follow simple (1-step) directions. Without actually seeing a child for an assessment, it sounds like he is at least demonstrating some emergent language skills. At the age of two, the norms say that a child should have about 50 words and start combining words into short (2-word) phrases. That being said most 2 year olds can only be understood about 50% of the time. Based on what you are saying it sounds like he is trying to get words out and attempting to communicate which are all positive signs. The only other thing I would think a speech therapist could do for you is evaluate whether he has some sort of oral-motor issue that is making it difficult for him to physically produce speech sounds and words.
I think at 22 months you can probably safely wait a little bit and see how things progress, since he is starting to talk. If you are really worried and just can't shake the feeling you might want a speech therapist to do an assessment- just for you own peace of mind. You are right - if there is a problem it is better to identify it early, but the difference between 22 months and 2 years of age is not that big. Good luck!

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B.H.

answers from Charlotte on

hi, J.!

how are you doing? i have a 24 month old little guy and he is not really a talker either...he signs over 80 words and now has about 6 spoken words. he is getting early intervention speech therapy because he didn't start babbling by 12 months and had no words by 18 months. i highly recommend early intervention as before we started it, i really didn't know how to help him. the evaluation is free and we pay a very small fee (less than a co-pay) each time the speech therapist sees him. the nice thing is that she comes to our house once a week to help him. we are using the alta mira early intervenion program. you should talk with your pediatrician about your concerns!

hope this helps! if you want to chat more, just write!
-B.

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S.F.

answers from Eugene on

I have four kids, and they all developed differently. My youngest is a girl, 21 months now. She is doing the same thing your son is. I'm noticing it rapidly increasing the last couple of weeks, which is how my eldest did. He didn't say but one word a day for the longest time, then after his second birthday he started talking... and wouldn't stop! LOL Keep watching though.

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J.G.

answers from Tucson on

I wouldn't be overly concerned at his age. If this continues into the two year old stage without progression, I would seek the advice of your pediatrician or speech therapist. I work with several toddlers, and none of them seem to ever be at the same level. I know there are toddlers who can more clearly articulate, but it is not uncommon for some to be in their two's before they develop those skills. If you happen to see your pediatrician over the next few months, you could discuss it with him or her just to ease your mind. :)

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B.G.

answers from Phoenix on

Hi J.,
It is always tough to know what to do and you will often hear a different story from everyone. I agree that you should pursue an early intervention evaluation. I am a speech therapist in AZ and have provided early intervention services for 6 years. Here families do not have to pay anything for the eval or the services. You should be able to just Google early intervention for your area and get the contact info. Good luck! Let me know if I can help!
B.

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S.C.

answers from Albuquerque on

My youngest had the same problem....we even had her hearing tested...my husband was of the belief that she was what was known in the old south as "tongue-tied"! When she did start talking (she was over 2yrs old by that time) she talked in sentances! Not just one word at a time! Now she is the most talkative of all my children! According to the doctor she didn't talk because the rest of us did her talking for her! Or she just didn't need to because we all knew her so well and knew what she wanted by her actions before she needed to utter any words. So...once your doctor has ruled out medical reasons....just relax and let your son talk on his own timeline! Good Luck and should there be a medical reason just relax and breathe, then take it one day at a time...I know this is a cliche but having gone through alot with my 5 children this is a necessity for any mother to be able to do! Good Luck!

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D.H.

answers from Phoenix on

Hi J.,
I thought my oldest son would never talk, he was 2 1/2 before he finally, all of a sudden came out with "Happy Birthday" to his father in front of everyone at his party. We were all shocked :} As long as everything looks ok, I wouldn't worry too much.
p.s. My non-talker is now almost 25 and in a PhD program (Chemistry) he still doesn't talk a lot, but sure has a lot going on in his mind.

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S.B.

answers from Flagstaff on

Hey, don't worry until you notice something that is truly wrong - I didn't speak until I was almost four because I didn't have to. I never had to ask for anything, it was given to me before I needed to. Someone even asked my father if I was retarded. Dad finally decided I was not getting anything even supper without asking. Took me one day and I began to ask for what I needed or wanted. I have a Ph.D now so it had nothing to do with intelligence it was merely laziness.
Suz

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S.K.

answers from Phoenix on

I have an older brother who is servely retarded so I have some experience with special needs persons. Your son is absolutely not like my brother but I think your concern is warranted. I think you should see what your pediatrician suggests first. Creative Networks and DDD (Department of Developmental Disabilities) should be good resources if you need them. These are services provided through the state to service all needs to special needs cases. I have used them and even worked for them in the past. It was so vital for my family. If you would like more info I would be happy to help. God Bless you beautiful son.

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L.A.

answers from Phoenix on

As a speech therapist myself, I ditto Denise's response!

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B.G.

answers from Phoenix on

I wouldn't worry if I were you. You'll find that all children are blessed with different natural gifts and abilities. I have a 7 year old who was advanced in her speech at eighteen months. My 5 year old boy was speaking well by age two. My daughter who is almost 2 and a half is reaching the point where we understand more. I like you was a little nervous because she was about the level of your son at age two and the other children I had were at a different level with their speech at 2. One day the light turned on though. She is singing songs and telling on her brother. It is amazing what a couple months will do. I have found that it helps to read aloud to my children and sing to them so they can see my mouth and have them repeat sounds.
I think it is too early to tell, but then again you are the mother and you know what your child needs more than anyone!

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E.D.

answers from Tucson on

In addition to all the great suggestions, I would suggest learning a few signs to teach to him, so in case there is a hearing problem he is getting more exposure to language, plus it helps so much for you to be able to communicate with him. my hubby is a teacher of the deaf and we taught sign to each of our kids. my youngest is 20 months, and hardly speaks, and he's the one we didn't really teach sign to! but him knowing the signs for food, water, more, please, hurt, etc. really helps him to communicate. plus, studies have shown that exposure to sign language at an early age actually increases their language comprehension. (it does not delay speaking as people will tell you...)

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R.J.

answers from Phoenix on

I was in the same situation not long ago. My son, who is now seven, was hitting intellectual milestones way early, and taught himself how to read with just basic phonics help from me when he was three. He's always been highly advanced, but his little brother, now almost four, decided he was going to take his precious time...with everything. Walked at 15 months, wasn't talking much until well past his second birthday, just now starting to get interested in letters and numbers, etc. He's a perfectly intelligent and delightfully healthy child. He just decided he wasn't interested in being on any doctor's developmental chart, that's all. And as far as I'm concerned, that's perfectly fine. The longer he stays my baby, the better!

~ R.

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C.C.

answers from Phoenix on

My second son did not speak until he was about 2. Even then most people could not understand him. This hurt his relationship with his grandparents. They wouldn't take the time to wait for him to try to get the words out and went on to talk to his older brother whom they could easily understand. We found out that he was partially tongue tied. He started speech therapy when he was about 3 (the public school offered it to pre-school children free) and the first day the teacher had him saying his name. It was wonderful! I truly think the sooner the better. I'd call his dr.

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M.H.

answers from Las Cruces on

It's probably nothing to worry about, the age difference in your children is about the same as mine, and I had an older girl and younger boy. My son was very slow to really start talking, I had his hearing tested, and developmentmental testing done, and there were no problems. We could hardly understand anything he said, and sometimes we could tell by expressions and tone of voice if he were asking questions, but not the words, he was around the same age as your son at the time. He is almost 14 now, and believe me, he has no speech problem, and an amazing vocabulary. My daughter was a caregiver and I really think that because she was so intent on giving him everything, that he never really had to talk, because she gave him anything he wanted if he just looked at it, besides the fact that he was very advanced in physical aptitude, so if she didn't do it for him, he would usually just do it himself. I would still have him checked out, just in case, but don't really worry till you know there is something to worry about. He obviously sounds as if he has no mental problems or hearing problems, since he understands you. To check his hearing, you might ask him a question in a normal voice behind his back, something you know will catch his interest, if he responds, then that pretty much rules out hearing problems. There are usually community services that will help with speech problems for preschool age kids based on income or sometimes even free, if the child qualifies, that's what I did, ask your local daycares or your doctor about services like that. I don't know how much that helped or if he just caught up when he was ready. Also, notice if your daughter is doing too much for him, and I also think that if a child watches television much, that will effect their speech. I was in college when my son was little and he loved cartoons, so I let him watch tv a lot while I was studying.

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M.C.

answers from Phoenix on

Not a speach therapist but from my personal experience. my 4 year old wasn't at the stage his other friends were when he was 20 months but now he has very good pronunciation and loves to sing and read(memorize) books. My 25 month old was saying some words before he turned 2 but it was like his vocabulary tripled right after his 2nd birthday. they surprise me everyday. But he also has no interest in potty training and my 4 year old was almost done when he was 25 months. so they are all different.

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B.M.

answers from Phoenix on

When my oldest was your son's age, he wasn't even saying Mommy. We x=called him silent Bob, and were starting to get concerned because we saw all the kids in his daycare class far beyond him in speech development. Then all of a sudden, he started taking right before his second birthday. Now, at 2 1/2, he is a very clear conversational speaker, ahead of most kids his age. So don't worry. If you want to try to help develop his speech, the picture books are great. We got him a couple books that had photographs of around the house things, and we would look at it every night. Before long, he was starting to say the words. It sounds like your son is doing fine, if he has a small vocabulary already. Don't stress about it. He'll be fine!

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