My 5 Year Old Wets the Bed EVERY Night

They sell underwear that are suppose to help this. They claim after a week the child will stop... It is sold at one step ahead.. look it up on line.

My cousin's son wet the bed until he was 12! What finally worked for him was his own alarm clock. They estimated what time he was wetting the bed and HE set the alarm clock before going to bed each night. Then HE got up and peed when the clock went off. And if he wet the bed, HE pulled off the sheets and any wet bedding in the morning and put it in the washing machine first thing, and in the dryer before going off to school. Worked like a charm!

Hi S., my daughter was a bed wetter for some time (5 or 6 years of age), although not every night. Whenever she did wet the bed, I would tell her "not to worry," "it's okay," "we'll take care of it," etc., because I didn't want her to feel badly about herself. Then, she and I had a conversation about it one day and she said, "but, Mom, you said it was okay!" I then realized that I had been giving her permission to wet the bed! So, I explained to her in a matter of fact way that the goal is to NOT wet the bed - to get up and use the bathroom. She never wet the bed again! For me it was simply a matter of stating the obvious, because children take what we say very literally. I wish you the best as I know how disruptive it can be to be up changing sheets every night. A.

My daughter is 7 and still occasionally wets the bed. My pediatrician sent us to a urologist when she was 5. We have since found out that her bladder is half the size of a normal bladder for kids her age. You might check that out. You never know, it may not be anything they can control.

We have a daughter who is 6 1/2 and still wears the big kid diapers at night. We went through some difficult and frustrating times with both day and night wetting but I feel more relaxed about it now. I read in a book that it would be the same to hold your child responsible for wetting her bed as to hold her responsible for it raining at night. That kind of put things in perspective for me. There is really not much training you can do for something happening when your daughter is asleep. During our struggles I found out that there is a lot of family history of bedwetting, until 7, 10 or even into teen years! Let's hope neither of us have to wait that long though! I just want to give you this input to let you know that it is OK to put a night time pull up on your 5 year old - there's a lot of them at the stores so there must be many people using them. It is to me a much better option than washing sheets every day. I hope you find a solution that works for all of you.

I'm way past these years with my girls but both of them didn't stop wearing nightime pull ups until they were about 5 1/2. My pediatrician told me that there is a hormone in the brain that blocks us from peeing at night. She said that it should kick in by the time they were 6 and if not we should get it checked. It did by 5 1/2 and that was the end of pullups!
Relax, buy the pull ups...nature will win out, Really!

My daughter was the same way. We did the same things you have done and I'm here to say NONE of that worked. Your child must be a super sound sleeper. That's what the pediatrican said about my daughter. Don't stress out about it, buy the larger diapers. One day, like magic, the night pee will stop. Atleast that was our experience. Do your best not to get frustrated and make your child feel bad. They wish they didn't pee in their sleep as much as you.
Good Luck!

I know it can be frustrating (we went through something similiar with our older child), but controlling the bladder throughout the night is something that some children are not biologically ready to do, even at age 5. In other words, no matter what you or your husband do, your child' s body may not be ready to hold her bladder for the entire night. For that reason, I do think nighttime diapers are a wise choice. You may also jsut want to back off of staying dry at night for a while and see if things just work themselves out with the nightime diapers with some. I would also talk to your child's pediatrician and see if he or she have any suggestions for you.

Good luck!

Hi S.- Having had two sons who, for different reasons periodically wet the bed until about age ten or eleven, I sympathise enormously with your frustration and fatigue- but first of all, please do not ever punish her or scold her for what she cannot help. This is much easier said than done ( I have scolded so many times, only to regret it later), but it may help to know that often bed-wetting is related to some aspect of a child's health or constitution.
My first-born would frequently wet the bed about a day before he went into a major period of asthma- in his case, it was his kidneys signalling tnat something was wrong, and another sign of kidney stress is darkening (shadows) under the eyes.
If your daughter appears to be quite healthy ( as was/is my second son) it may be her constitution. Is she a dreamy sort of child? Does she like to take her time with meals and other things? Is she hard to wake? If so, she is probably not sufficiently stirred by her full bladder.
My mother-in-law used a bed-alarm with two of my son's aunts and uncles, and they still shudder at the memory. Both of them have had troubles with insomnia as adults, though one can't prove it's related.
My advice to you is to make your life as simple as possible at this point- buy the diapers and bide your time. If a check-up has ruled out health issues, you can be pretty-well assured that the problem will pass eventually, but if you keep expecting it to end soon, everyone will be unhappy.
One dietary measure which you may not have tried, but which helped us, is to "eat like a king at breakfast, like a prince at lunch and a pauper in the evening"- this refers to the protein content of meals, and is actually true for all people- we digest protein much better in the early part of the day, and are better off after about 3:00p.m. if we have only mild carbs and vegetables.
I hope this helps!- R.

Has she been checked by the pediatrician? Do you trust a chiropractor to see if there is anything structurally working against her own best wishes not to wet? If you want to do something gentle, try Jin Shin Jyutsu, a type of body work children learn in Japan to do on themselves and each other.

I have seen a total reduction in sugar (no sodas for sure!) work. The bladder meridian could be irritated by lots of sugar.

Also, withholding water is not the best. Try to "front-end" the water during the day and restrict after dinner.

An "exercise" that may help (it did for me prior to getting a sonagram ) is to have her drink lots of water in 1/2 hour, to stretch her bladder. To prep for the sonogram, I drank 48 ounces, so titrate based upon her weight. When I did this, the next day, I could coast through the exam without any (!) discomfort or urgency, probably because I had stretched my bladder so nicely by practicing the day before.

Hi S. - wow, I cannot even imagine how disruptive and frustrating this must be. You may want to look at Elizabeth Pantley's website. I think she has a section on potty training too. www.pantley.com/elizabeth

Another thing you may not have approached yet is that there might be something emotional underlying her behavior. If you or your husband work, the company may have an Employee Assistance Program (EAP) whereby you can find a good child psychologist, who may help you to get down to the root of the problem.

Good luck to you!

I have a 7 year old who still wets the bed about 2-3 nights a week. At age 5 we needed to wear GoodNites(big boy pull ups) every night. I know how frustrated you are. I got so tired of doing laundry every morning. We have had a little success with the bed alarms. He wears a small sensor in his underwear at night and an alarm across the room wakes him up if it gets wet. Really, it wakes up Mom and I get him to the bathroom. It hasn't cured the problem, but it has helped. Our doctor said bedwetting is normal and quite common, especially with boys, until age 8 or 9. Good luck!

My 14 year old son has this issue ... STILL. When we went to the doctor about it one of the first questions he asked me was "Has he EVER had long periods of dryness at night?" .. The answer at the time was NO. (If they've never been dry it's more likely to be physical over emotional or a reaction to something new). What was determined was that basically my son's body was the size of a 12 year olds with a 12 yr old's bodies needs fluid wise, but his adrenal gland (which helps control night time urination) was the size of the 8 year old he actually was. We opted to put him on DDAVP which is an anti-diuretic. And it worked WONDERS, and it was temporary. He was getting to big for the pull ups to be comfortable anymore.

We use(d) a plastic undersheet on his bed to protect the mattress, when he'd wake up AFTER becoming thoroughly soaked (and therefore chilled) we'd simply change the sheets, have him take a quick shower to clean up, put him in clean jammies and undies and send him back to bed.

Now I've noticed he as issues when he's going through a growth spurt the bedwetting starts again for a short time then stops. He also now changes his own bedding.

And yes it can be genetic. My brother wet the bed till he was about 10, and an uncle wet the bed occasionally into his early 20's. (With my uncle I'm POSITIVE there were other issues to go along with the physical ones, my grandmother being a lunatic one of them).

Don't punish the child, continue to encourage them to try to use the bathroom before bed and during the night and consult your pediatrician for possible physical reasons for the bedwetting.

As my pediatrician said "I've never known of a child graduating from high school who still wet the bed every night. So don't worry he will outgrow it." And amazingly enough, he was right.

It could be normal - it takes kids a long time to be able to wake up to pee in the toilet. I would ask her pediatrician though, she may have a simple problem that they can fix/help with or something more serious. Good luck.

My daughter wet the bed for the longest time, have you taken her to the Dr. I took my daughter when she was young, he prescribed a pill for her to take, and it made a big difference, she eventually out grew it, she is 18 now, so be patient, because they grow up fast

I don't have this problem but I do have an idea that worked for us when our dauughter was having accidents at night (a lot)

We had the overnight pull ups and she wore them over her underwear. If she had an accident she was in charge of taking them off and putting on new panties. I think we even layed an extra pair out for her each night to facillitate that.

I don't know about you, but I figure kids wet the bed a lot. I don't think it's a horrible thing. What is horrible is ME having to get up and change the sheets in the middle of the night.. feel me? :)

This way I didn't make her feel bad (as I sometimes did with my frustration at having to change sheets at 2am) and she gets to deal with it herself... as she was old enough to handle it.

best of luck. the kids stop eventually....

I wouldn't worry about it at age 5, frankly. Bedwetters run in both my husband's family and mine -- one relative took till age 9 before he was over it. One of my kids (we have three) is 10 and still has trouble with this. Some kids sleep so deeply they literally can't wake up even with a full bladder. I wonder if there might be hypoglycemic issues at work as well in your kid's case? Anyway, we have had a certain amount of success with bed alarms (noisemakers or vibrating), and with a pre-bed snack that's got some protein and enough complex carbs to keep blood sugar from plummeting in the night -- when that happens, it's hard for a child to wake up even to go to the bathroom.

The nighttime diapers for big kids are a life saver. Nothing wrong with a bath in the morning instead of at night, either. Mainly just keep your cool -- it gets really hard on these kids if they feel guilty or like they're bad for doing this. She can't help it, and soon enough it will bother her more than it does you. Good luck.

Hi - I'm a nurse practitioner and I have to say maybe your child doesn't have the physiological ability to control urination at night, some children are delayed in this manner. Have you talked to your health care provider about this issue? If you are frustrated, think about how your daughter feels. Some kids take longer to develop that ability to control their urination. I would make an appt to see my health care provider and get her checked out.

Hi!

I have a 12 year old who has had this issue since he was 5. He was diagnosed at that time with Type 1 diabetes, but we were assured that the disease doesnt cause it (probably the stress may have triggered it). Anyway, we have been to urologists and other specialists who assure us that it is normal...yes, he is on the outside of normal at this stage, but regardless we shouldnt worry.

Like the last note said...try to make it a part of life w/o stressing. Showers in the morning, packing a pad with his sleeping bag at sleepovers (thank goodness for understanding friends) etc.

Life with diabetes has taught me a lot about not stressing over little things...and when all else fails and I'm grouching about changing the sheets for the nth time I remind myself what a blessing he is and I am thankful I can be here for him.

Did you know bed wetting is generic. If not yourself, ask your husband did he we the bed for a long period of time, or a close family memeber. It's not really much you can do. But the last thing you want is to make your child feel guilty. it would be like you have some bad pain at night and it want stop, you husband telling you it's your fault. My best friend, 65 yrs old, bed wet when she was young and she was spanked and yelled at, it's a long lasting evil she still suffers and talk about today. She found out it was generic, and her son went through it. Be patient. Also, I have boxes of pullups for 50-60 lbs, I will give them to you, let me know if it will be ok. e-mail address: ____@____.com

Pacific International is a 57 yr old successful company that my daughter went through an alarm and counseling program. It started with one meeting in person, and the rest was counseling by phone or mail unless we requested in person. They go through a gradual program that is very detailed and encouraging to the kids an parents but it works in getting a child to stop bed wetting. It was expensive at $1,995 but my daughter was gradually dry and then completely after about 6 weeks or so. It takes commitment and work on your part but the best things always do. It covers if they ever relapse and any support or counsel. Hope it helps!
(800)477-2233 is their #. ____@____.com is my address if you have further questions. Pamela H.

I asked the same question about my 10 yr old and there are alot of good responses in my profile. Check it out.

Very Important! Never & I mean Never punish your child for this. she is still very young and there could be many factors contributing to this. Very rarely is this a discipline issue. I have been dealing with this for the last 5, almost 6 years. There are lots of methods out there as each child and their bedwetting is unique. Do lots of research on the internet and do what you can to empower your little girl. Yes you are frustrated, but be clear on where you place your frustration. This may be inconvenient for you but imagine how she feels waking up wet. Its cold, sticky, smelly & "only babies do it". It doesn't help to make her feel bad about her self or that it's her fault, chances are she is feeling that already. I am available if you would like someone to talk to about this I would be happy to hear from you. As I said I have been dealing with this for some time now and I understand & feel for you.
Best Wishes
Jennnifer

Hi S.... Your daughter may have a bladder infection, causing her to urinate in bed at night, so you may want to have her tested. Another possibility is she may be doing this for attention? Sometimes children regress, I had this happen to my first daughter when her father and I divorced, it's a child's way of dealing with something emotional they can't communicate about. Hope this helps, and hold your sanity about the bed wetting, there's gotta be an answer for it. Sincerely, CJ

You do know bladder control develops at it's own rate sometimes not maturing until 12-13 years in some cases? And most likely your child is not *trying* to pee their bed? Punishment is unfair and can make it worse in these cases as well due to the stress it puts on her. You need to just change the sheets and not make negative comments to your child about it. It may even improve when she stops stressing about how mad mommy is at her about something she can not control. There are alarm wetting systems but in my experience they are little help because most pee accidents occur because the child is in very deep sleep and the alarm will wake everyone else in the house before the person it is intended for wakes.

Also if you have not gotten her checked by the pediatrician, please do so just to make sure there is not a underlaying infection or problem with her urinary track or possible diabetes . Most of the time it is just something that needs it's own time to correct but better safe then sorry.

I can so relate! My daughter (now 19)did the same-it is frustrating, tiring & emotional for both parties. A pediatrician gave some advice which helped tremendously. Since your daughter is now 5, have her "help" you when this occurs-no recriminations, just have her help you strip the sheets & put them in the wash, put on clean ones, strip off wet jammies, get cleaned up, put on fresh, get soiled ones in wash, etc. Something about the process, awareness & yes, probably just a bit more maturity after a couple of "accidents" it did the trick!

I had the same problem with my daughter. My suggestion is to take her to the pediatrician. There could be a medical condition. Example: diabetes or cystitis. My daughter was given a medicine that really helped. They will also suggest you to try and retrain her. That didn't work! Our case may be different, though, we have issues with an irritable bladder. Even now, when she has to go, there better be a bathroom near or she ends up doing the "potty dance"
There is another cause that no one likes to hear or think about. But, children do things like over-eat and bed-wetting when they have been molested. (Makes them look unattractive to the molestor) Only your doctor can tell if this could be the cause! Chin up! It will get better! My daughter is now 20!

Not enough info, need to know if it's been going on since potty training or just recently. Depending on the answer, it could be a whole other problem.

If since training, what did the Doctor say about it? My 4 year old nephew has a diagnosed condition which makes him wet at night. Although they say he's likely to grow out of it, he's in pull-ups at night until then. Also I'm sure you know she's not doing it on purpose, so please try not to get angry at her.

If it started recently, what's happening in her life, calmly talk to her. Still should ask the doctor's opinion. good luck.

Hi S.,

Trust me, I know it's frustrating. 1 of my 3 sons did the same thing. As I'm sure others will tell you, it may have something to do with your have a toddler in your home. Of course, that doesn't 'fix' the clean-up problem!

After trying everything else, as you have, I realized I didn't know of any 12 year olds still wetting the bed, and certainly not any able body adults. So, I let go of the stressing about it and started putting my son (who is 4 yrs older than the youngest), in diapers overnight. The bed wetting started to be less and less often. Within months it stopped altogether.

As you know, this will be one of the least of your worries as your children grow. Relax, it won't last forever -- even if it seems like it already has! :)

Good luck!

have you talked to your pediatrician? does she wake up when she wets or does she wet and sleep through it? my son wears a little device called the sleep dry alarm. our pediatrician told us about it. he was wetting and not waking up. the alarm attaches to his underwear and when he starts to wet, the alarm wakes him up then we run to his room and help him get to the bathroom. i hope this helps you! good luck - i know it's hard not to get angry about washing and changing sheets every day!

Have you been assured by her doctor that there is nothing physiologically wrong with her? That would be the first stop...some children have immature systems and are just not able to recognize the signals and/or rouse themselves from sleep when they have to go.

I have a friend whose 5 year old son had his adenoids removed because they were so large they partially blocked his airways when he slept. Because he never really got a good nights sleep, he was especially difficult to rouse. Adenoids removed, problem resolved quickly thereafter.

The key is not to be punitive with your daughter, as hard as it is. You're doing the right things, no drink after a certain time, potty runs in the middle of the night. Just to give yourself a break, put her in diapers. Explain that she'll get a special treat every night that she keeps the diaper dry. If she keeps them dry for two weeks solid do something extra-special: meal out at her favorite restaurant, toy, trip to amusement park. When I potty trained my youngest daughter (who was day trained at 2 but wasn't night trained until 4) I told her that when I finally could get rid of the diapers in the house, we'd take her to Disneyland to celebrate what a big girl she had become.

At this point, I was told it can be an emotional thing. Find out what's bothering her. If you work outside the home, this could be the real reason. Call Child Psychologist in your area. They do wonders. My son had trouble with it when he was even older. I know it is a pain but will go away with proper intervention. You know about the rubberized sheet protectors right? Get to fabric store and ask for the stuff with flannel on one side and rubber on the other and make a weide strip long enough to tuck in under the sides of the bed. Then, you are only washing a strip of rubberized flannel and an occasional blanket. There are really good family therapists who might be trained in this system which treats people with trauma experiences but can be used to help rid her of whatever it is that might be triggering it. It has three or four letters - CREM or something or other. If interested, I can give you a name of a woman up in Burlingame who is certified. REALLY good, loving and talented woman. Good luck.

Hi S.,

I had the exact same situation with my son. I tried everything (and always felt bad when he would ask for a glass of water after 6). I finally just gave up and bought the overnight diapers (I think they were called Good Nights -- they were great!).
Well, my son is now 6 years and 3 months and he never wets the bed. One night, back in November, he said he wanted to try sleeping without his diaper. We have not had an accident since. I think that some kids just take a lot longer than others and it is not a process that you can rush. I think that there is both psychological and anatomical growth that needs to happen. So, don't worry and hang in there. I used to think I would never stop buying diapers but it's now a distant memory.

Hi S.,
I know a little about this because my nephew who is 12 is still wetting the bed. He sleeps so hard that he just doesn't wake up. My suggestion is to go to the pediatrician. I know my family was told you have to wake them up in the middle of the night and walk them to the toilet. So, let's say she goes to bed at 7:30, then at 9:00 and 11:00 you wake her up, have her walk in her sleep (don't fully wake her) and walk her to the toilet and have her sit down. Wait a few minutes if she goes or not get her up and put her back to bed. I want to say they did it again at 3am. I did this with my son and it helped immensely. She will then start doing it on her own in a matter of days...possibly a week or so. My nephew I think it was more of a challenge and consistency is everything. Eventually they were told they could get a divice that works as an alarm so as soon as the bed is wet it would sound off to wake him to have him go to the bathroom. They opted to not do that solution. As a result he is in 7th grade and still wets the bed almost every night. His biological mother did this until she was 12 and the Dr.'s have told them, he will too grow out of it around that age.
Good luck.

I've loved the quick-change aspect of our ultimate crib sheets and will use them in the BigBoyBed when my oldest decides not to wear a diaper to sleep.
http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2267582
You can either have her sleep on it all the time and replace it with a clean one as needed (we have 3) or put it on top of the wet spot so you can get your daughter back to sleep quickly. It's bottom layer is waterproof, it has an absorbent center and the top is cotton weave like a bedsheet.

I've heard a lot of different things bout this; some kids don't have enough of some chemical that signals the brain to wake you up when you're sleeping and you have to go to the bathroom, some kids bladders aren't developed enough to hold it so long...I can't think of all the things I've heard. My son is seven and sleeps in pull ups still. I've tried all kinds of things too. But try not to get mad at her. It's not her fault. (Easier said than done at 2am, I know) All the reasons I've heard all say it's not the child's fault and they will grow out of it. Some people put their kids on medication to stop it. You could ask your pediatrician. I don't like that idea so for now I'm investing in PullUps! Don't get the ones that get cold when they get wet. They don't hold as much and leak ALL the time. Sorry I don't have a quick fix. I wish I did. Hang in there! Oh, and read the other requests on this web site that talk about bed wetting, there were some other ideas about it that i can't remember right now.

My 8 year old wet the bed every night until about 6 months ago...I feel your pain, but may I suggest never to humiliate your daughter or imply that it is something she is doing intentionally or has any control over. I put off buying them in hopes that all our efforts and attempts to help her would be successful, but my daughter wore a "Goodnites" brand overnight diaper (available in S/M, or L/XL depending on her weight, and in girl's and boy's)every night, and I'm glad you'll be getting some this weekend--using them will help tremendously with your frustration. When she began wearing them, we continued the same routine when it came to no drinks before bed, and encouraging her to try to wake up if she needed to go. When we noticed the Goodnite was less and less full, and ultimately dry in the morning, we let her know she was ready to sleep without one (a process that took many years.) From my reasearch on the subject, I've learned that bed wetting can be passed down genetically. My father did, I did (until 3rd grade) as my daughter did. The key word is "did." Your daughter will outgrow it as we all did. Good Luck, and remember there are far worse "genetic flaws."

Hi S.,

I'd just like to echo the other responses--please find love in your heart for your little girl as she's not able to do what you want her to do at this moment. Why not just keep her in diapers? It's much easier than dealing with a wet bed all the time. I've heard from many other parents that this is not uncommon. I think as a culture we try to push our kids to do what we think they should do long before they are ready for it--and it undermines them! I bet you could relieve yourself of a lot of that frustration by taking a deep breath, using diapers, and accepting that this is where she is at this moment--and that when she's ready it will change. She won't be going to college in diapers! My experience is that it's when I fight what's happening that I suffer--and I can make others suffer along with me.

Hope this helps!

blessings, M.

have you mentioned this to her pediatrician Many children wet the bed sometimes there are medical issues such as allergies many times bed wettign runs in families ask your realtives. Just get the G"good nights" pants and have a few of your own
Its not her fault give her some good nights been ther done that J.

Dear S.,

My advice is to not stress over this. Go ahead and buy some pull ups to save yourself some work. Your 5 year-old's bladder will eventually be able to go through the night. My granddaughter had the same issue, and still wet the bed at times until she was about 7 1/2. She is now 8 1/2 and has not had an accident at night in about a year. She still has a weak bladder, though, and I know when she tells me she has to go, we'd better get to a bathroom asap. Some kids have more difficulty with their bladders than others. Our doctor told us it would eventually get better, and it did. I know it is hard. It was hard on her too because she would be embarrassed if it happened when her cousins were around, but we never made a big deal about it. I had the same problem when I was young, and used to get in trouble for it. My bedsheets were often on the clothesline for the whole neighborhood to see and I was made fun of at school.

For our granddaughter, we did try not giving her anything to drink after a certain hour and making sure she went to the bathroom before bed. Gradually, she started waking up some mornings dry and we praised her when this happened, but did not scold her when it didn't. Now, she can drink before bed and not have a problem.

Hang in there. Things will get better!

L.

My son wet the bed until 10. At first all the time then just 1 or 2 times a month. I went through all the emotions of: he's not happy, he's too stressed at school, and last but not least, I am a horrible parent. His doctor told me it was physiological and he would grow out of it...which he did. Every child is different. I bought plastic sheets for his matress and tried to be firm but gentle that he needs to change his bed (when he got old enough. I also made sure he went to bathroom before bed every night.