My 8-Month Old Son Still Wakes up 2-3 Times a Night.

My daughter didn't sleep through the night until she was 13 months old. I just dealt with it. (And just to be clear, I work full time too; so I didn't get to nap when she napped or anything like that...) She was a snacker and only would drink 3 or 4 ounces at a time; so she'd get up hungry. She's 18 months now and still gets up at 11:30pm every night. This is going to sound niave, but they are small for such a short amount of time that her getting up is fine by me. I'm not a believer in crying it out either; and I think my daughter was too little and too stubborn to try to train any differently. Plus maybe I'm selfish; I LOVE watching her fall asleep; so the more times a night the better for me! Good luck and love him lots. :)

K.

First of all, three naps are too many, and the last one is too close to bedtime. Only give him two naps, the last being in the afternoon. He will get used to it. As far as sleep training, we had to use the cry it out method. I know so many people don't like that, think it's cruel, etc., but it's what worked for us, only took one night, and it's the best thing I ever did.

My son did the same thing with an occasional night of not waking up. I thought the same thing as you "am I ever going to not have to get up in the night" Then one night he slpet through and he has since. He is now 13 months old, I think they just grow out of it. About a month or two before he started sleeping all night I would only alow him 1 feeding then if he woke up at 4:00 he would cry or I would rock him grab a stuffed animal and play for a little bit then put him back in his crib awake, he wouldn't fuss they he would go back to sleep.

Hi,

I am a sleep consultant, so if you would like a sleep consultation I can be reached at ###-###-####. First off though, that third nap - should not be a nap, but should instead be turned into an early bedtime. Babies 6 months and up should go to bed sometime between 6:30 - 8:30. It sounds like your son, could go to bed by seven and then not have the third nap. Let me know if you wold like additional help.

K.

Hi C.,

Maybe there is a way that you can gradually cut down the nap times... I am a mom of four and I found the best way to help them start sleeping through the night was to gradually cut down the nap times. I also found though, that each baby is different and has different sleeping patterns but I generally tried to make sure all naps were done by 6:00 pm (maybe earlier depending on the baby). I don't suggest waking a baby in a good sleep but maybe find a way to gently have him wake up on his own (soft music or tv sounds). Maybe you cut the 2-4 nap time to 2-3 and then maybe the last nap of the night from 5-6?

Anyway, hope this helps or you're able to find a nice solution. I am also a working mom and you have to find all the helpful hints when you can. :)

S.

My son was doing the same thing at that age. That was also about the time we got him down to two naps a day as other Moms have suggested and started putting him down by 8. When I was ready to cut out the middle-of-the-night feeding, I'd still go to him when he awoke and craddle him in our glider, but I wouldn't offer up the breast. For two nights he squirmed and fussed trying to latch on (I even ending up with a hickey on my arm) but I just held on tight and watched the clock. Within five minutes (though it felt longer), he'd settle and drift back off to be put back in his crib. The third night, he didn't even wake up. I think it's really about breaking the "habit" but I'm not into the whole CIO deal and wanted him to know I was there even if he wasn't getting food. Good luck!

I agree with taking away the evening nap but I was would also let him cry at night. My son did the exact same thing at that age. He's now 1 1/2 and has been sleeping through the night 12 hours since we let him cry it out for a couple days. It's not fun but the reward for both him and you is worth it. The first night is the worst but make a pact with your spouse that you won't even go in to get him at all. Just let him cry. It may be 2 hours but he will go back to sleep. It will take 3-4 days if you don't go in with him.

Just advice from a mom with 2 kids who sleep amazingly through the night!
Good luck!

Try eliminating a day time nap and replace it with a meal or a snack. Maybe if he has more to eat during the day he'll sleep longer at night because he's more satisfied. It might be hard if he's cranky at that hour so try putting him to bed for the night an hour earlier.

My suggestion is cut the amount of naps. I have an 11 month old that only takes the 12:00 to 1:30 (2 if I'm lucky) If he takes the evening nap, it's gonna be a long night! We stopped pushing so many naps a few months ago. If your baby is in daycare talk to them about putting baby on a less regimented sleep schedule. Good luck!

I'm in the exact same place. My son is almost 8 months, and a good night for us is making it until 4 am. Most nights are more like yours. His nap schedule is identical, so I like people's advice to try to cut it down to two. An earlier bedtime is not an option for our family. My husband doesn't get home until 7:30 or 8:00, so he just barely gets to have anytime Daddy time as it is. Anyway, not much help. But I want you to know you're not alone. I was starting to wonder if my son was having a problem, but if yours is the same way, it may just be the way some (especially breastfed) babies are. I'm not willing to let him CIO, so for now, we'll just have to keep working on it.

P.S. Coincidentally, right after I posted this, I got an email from a parenting site that dealt with this exact issue. Here's what it said:
"If you're having a hard time weaning your baby from nighttime feedings, and your baby is eating solid foods, try giving only water during these nocturnal feedings. He may decide that the water is not worth waking up and crying for. However, you should not give your baby water until he is eating solid foods. Babies who are still only taking milk may fill up on water and then not be hungry for nursing, causing them to not meet their nutritional needs."

Food for thought :-)

That must really wear on you! I am the mother of a 20 month old and a 4 month old. They are both really good sleepers..thank goodness...but it took alot of work to get them to this point. I would suggest cutting out the last nap and holding him off for the other two naps. Then, as hard as it may be, cut out one of those night feedings immediately and let him learn how to soothe himself back to sleep. Sounds cruel and it maybe one of the most difficult things to do, it is never easy listening to your baby cry, but it may be one of the most valuable things to let me learn at his age. There is nothing better than letting your child figure out how to soothe themself back into sleep. There are many books on ways to accomplish this...we used the ferber method. It was a VERY long week....but the end result is well worth it. Basically, when she began to cry we would wait 5 minutes and then go in to soothe her by rubbing her back, whispering quitely without the lights on and without picking her up. Then leave the room. If she continued to cry we would wait 10 minutes until we went in again and do the same thing, letting her know it was time to go to sleep and tell her we love her but leave her in the crib. If she continued crying, do it again but wait 15 minutes this time and repeat adding 5 minutes to each time until she fell back asleep. I tried this a few times before I coudl actually get up the courage to let her cry it out...but she did it after a few nights of us being consistent and she has been an amazing sleeper ever since. My son, the 4 month old, had some issues but I tried keeping him up longer during the day and put we put him down promptly about 8, 8:30 every night and he usually sleeps through until 5 or 6 in the morning. What ever you decide to do...remember you are a great mother and figuring these things out can be very trying and emotional....but you will do it and you will all get some peaceful rest in no time!! Good luck!!! You can do it!!

I would start by cutting out the 6pm nap. Around eight months, babies should be down to two naps a day anyway.
An eight month old baby does not need to eat at night! He weighs enough and is big enough to be sleeping through the night (all three of my children slept through the night by three months). Try feeding him more during the day. When he wakes up at night, try feeding him less each night, until he's not eating at all. If he'll take a binky, give him that on the last night. Do the same thing at the 4:00 feeding, but not at the same time. (I'd cut out the 2:00 feeding one week, and the 4:00 the next.) In a couple of weeks, he should be sleeping through the night. Good luck! :)

Many of my clients report that around 8 or 9 months their babies changed habits when it came to sleeping. Many seem to wake up more often this time and not want to sleep in their crib or room. It seems to me that if this is new behavior try pulling the crib back into your room and just talk to him when he wakes up at 2 and 4. (also see if you can use a transitional toy (like a teddy bear) and above all talk to him and explain to him why you'd like him to sleep through the night and how the teddy is there to keep him company when he wakes up. (some of my clients even made a recording of themselves and turn the ipod on with their voice (telling a story or reassuring the child) before they pick the baby up.

Most sleep training we'll ask you to allow your child to cry it out till they fall back to sleep. I personally don't think is a good idea at least before 1 years old. This is very common right now, I wonder if he wakes up from a bad dream and needs your attention. I promise this too shall pass. My kids are 25 and 23 both woke up in the middle of the night till about 16 month (not always though) and today at times I look at their baby pictures and long to have had even more time with them.

This being said, you got to do what you must to to keep your sanity. So don't listen to anyone but your own instinct. And if you are ok with your baby crying just make sure you do it using a good method (Not Ferber!) visit drjaygordon.com there is an article about it, although he also suggests to wait till 12 months.

Good luck

THIS TOO SHALL PASS

Hi C.,

I have a two-month old and a 21-month old, so sleep is something that I get little of, so I feel your pain. I think by eight months you are safe to eliminate the third nap. That way he is tired by bed time. I know it's a longer stretch and it might be challenging to get through, but it will be worth it in the end if it works. I believe by eight months my son was on two naps -- but my memory isn't so good these days. Best of luck to you...you will get through it. I keep telling myself that every day :)

Hi C.. I know you dont want to cut out his 6-7pm nap because of daddy time, but I think your son may be getting overtired or be getting too much sleep before bedtime. I find that when my babies (I have 9 month old twins)are overtired when they go to bed they will wake up in the night. I would say you need to get your baby on a new schedule and it will probably take about a month for the transition. Im not a huge fan of CIO, but I do take somewhat of a CIO approach. Do you really believe he is hungry in the middle of the night? If so then continue to feed, but if he is just wanting your attention then it needs to stop for your sanity. Our boys started sleeping through the night (7pm-7am) around 6 months of age. And by 7 1/2 months I rarely had to get up anymore. I cant tell you what you should do, but I can tell you what we did. They get dinner at 6pm...normally one gerber sweet potatoes stage 2 and some finger foods...all they will eat! Then...bathtime is 645ish. Once we are done with the bath its time for a bottle...and I would make them a 6 ounce bottle. When they were done with that I would put them to bed. Normally they are so tired they dont even fight it. I've trained them on a pacifier so they get lots of comfort from that and dont need me. We also made it a habit to always cover them with a VERY soft blanket. They now look for both when they want to sleep. As for the middle of the night stuff. If they wake up I will immediately get up and comfort them. When they are calm I put them back in bed and tell them I love them and to have a good night. I will leave. If they start crying they have 5 minutes until I come back. If after 5 minutes they are still crying I will go back in and again comfort and when they are calm I put them back in bed and leave. If they cry I will then wait 10 minutes until I go back in. Keep adding 5 minutes until he goes to sleep. If one of my babies gets sick it always disrupts their routine and they will test me again getting up every couple of hours, but after a day or two of this they are back on schedule. It does take some dedication and patients and you have to be willing to let them cry some, but crying will not hurt him. To try and eliminate the nighttime feeding make sure you are feeding him enough in the daytime. My boys eat LOTS of finger foods as well as 3 stage 2 gerber foods a day each. I feed them bottles 3 times a day and feed them solids 3 times a day. Good Luck...I hope something I said helps.

Unfortunately, you may have to let him cry it out. Do it on a weekend when you and your husband don't have to get up to go to work. We tried it the first weekend and I gave in. I went in to her and tried rocking her and singing. She wouldn't have it. I gave her the breast for about 10 min and she fell asleep. I knew I couldn't do that again. I was going to have to let her cry.

It took my 6 mos old daughter 3 days before she didn't wake during the night. The first night she cried over an hour it was terrible.

I would consider keeping him awake and not letting him take that evening nap. Keep him up until 8pm. He shouldn't still need that 3rd nap.

If you opt to let him cry it out, be mindful, it's really hard and you are going to want to give in. You will need the support of your husband to NOT give in! Good luck

Try reading "The No Cry Sleep Solution" by Pantley

Sometimes, you just gotta wait it out!
My daughter was still waking up about 8-10 times per night at that age (yes - seriously!! I was very much a zombie as you can imagine!) So 2-3 times is not so bad really!
You could always try having him only take 1-2 naps a day instead of 2-3 naps so he is more tired at bedtime. Or you can try feeding him a bit of baby cereal right before bedtime, to make sure he is full and doesn't wake up hungry a few hours later.
Just be patient, this phase doesn't last forever! ;)
Good luck.

My son did not get rid of his night feeding until about 10 months old, and that just sort of happened over time with some cuddling and encouragement...as for the three naps, at that age my son took two naps during the day until about 13 months when we switched to one long.

His bedtime routine has always been, get ready for bed at 7pm and in bed by 8pm and asleep shortly after. My son's doc said kids shouldn't nap past 3pm, so as to not interupt the natural wind down for bed that occurs with a bedtime routine.

Again, based on my son's doctor, sleep training isn't advised in kids until closer to one year old...once they are weened from brest/bottle and can make it through the night without nourishment. I am not an advocate of the CIO method, so I can't advise you on that. For me the choice was to co-sleep and transition to a big boy bed...it isn't for everyone, but you need to work with your hubby (if you've got the extra hands use'em) to help you create a good solid bedtime routine that creates consistency. It makes weening, and eventually sleeping through the night easier to transition.

Work on the naps first, and sooner rather than later he'll be over the night waking! Trust me, it changes daily and will keep on changing...

Maybe cut out one of the naps? Perhaps the 6-7? It sounds like he's fgeeting alot o sleep in the day. At that age my daughter took 2 naps, maybe 1/2 hr and another 1 1/2 hr. She still woke up at niht to nurse!! To me it doesn't sound quite so bad!! Are you nursinfg?Ips i just resd the previous posts. I'm shocked that so many moms let their baby CIO. We did not do this. I think it's important for baby to know you are there for him/her and that they can trust you will come to them when needed.Just my little ole' opinion Best, H.

My son is the same age and does not sleep through the night. He is up all different times. This is what I try to do. He can nurse when he wakes closest to 2am. So maybe at 1:00 maybe 3:00. I nurse him and he falls back to sleep, I put him in his crib. Maybe he is still a little awake when I put him down but barely. Other then that one time I let him cry. He will cry for about four or five minutes. If he goes on crying there is a poopy diaper or maybe teething pain.

He has two naps a day. bed at 7pm am nap around 10am Noon nap at 1:00 or 3:00. He wakes at 6am or 7am

I try to use my instincts the bestI can. If I could let him cry and NEVER pick him up I would. All my friends went through one night of hell to have sleeping babies through out the night. My pediatrician said he is too young to go without a feeding still. NOT sure this is right, because he eats table food and has a big meal three times a day and now also gets formula along with nursing, but just incase his little tummy is still too small I fallow her advice. ASAP I will let him cry, I need to sleep to run my family properly.
Something to consider, I stay home with my son and we engage all day. He knows I love him and I'm there for him. He can learn to do without me when he sleeps. I've taken baby steps toward this but what ever you feel is best, just go for it and try not to change your plan if you let him cry. Nothing could be worse then giving in when they are learning to comfort themselves back to sleep. I just think that's cruel. So be serious about it and be ready to commit. That's what I'm working towards. Good Luck!!!

honestly, i think your son is sleeping a bit too much during the day. my breastfed daughter used to wake the same amount at night until i reduced her daytime sleep and upped her solid calories. at 8 months she was napping 10-11 or 11:15, then an afternoon catnap at 3 for 30-45, sometimes an hour. she was going to sleep at 7 or 730. i gave her healthy good fat foods in addition to breastmilk. maybe start by reducing the first two naps by 15 minutes, and cutting the evening nap all together. he'll get cranky but your changing his routine so thats natural. any questions PM me - ive been there! good luck. :)

I'd work on cutting the 4am first. What I did was simply decrease the amount of time my daughter nursed over a couple weeks until she started sleeping through the feeding. Unfortunately, it will probably be a little tough on you too, being physically uncomfortable, but your body should begin making less milk as you decrease the feeding.

If he is already starting other foods (rice cereal, pureed veggies) that should also help him get more than enough to eat so that he has no need for these night feedings.

Once you're comfortable with that then tackle the 2am feeding the same way. Getting him to sleep through the night kind of depends on if your baby is only waking to eat, or if he is waking anyway. But you'll probably want to work on cutting the 6pm nap around the same time.

If you need to let him cry a bit to learn to go to sleep, have your husband help you -- it's so hard for us moms to listen to them cry! But it does work. We settled on letting our daughter cry for 15 min at a time and then checking on her to settle her down. Try to reassure him WITHOUT picking him up if you can. Then tell him goodnight and leave the room for another 15. Eventually they get it.

Good luck. Just remember it's easier to get up for work when you get some sleep! I know!

I agree with the other posts here, your baby is sleeping too much during the day. You'll need to stretch out the time he's awake, especially during the evening hours. He might be cranky at first, but it will help him sleep better through the night. What are you feeding him before bed? If my babies had full tummies before bed they slept better.

You'll just turn around and he'll be down to one nap a day! Good luck.

He is doing what is normal for a baby his age. My oldest didn't sleep through the night until he was 2. My middle didn't until 2 and my youngest until 2 1/2. They all three have continue to have times of waking in the night every so often. They are 9, 7 & 5. Kids just wake up!!!

I know how it is to be tired, but that is just a part of being a mommy!

Remember that your son is such a young baby... Feed him when he wants to eat!!! Good luck & enjoy even the time you spend together during the night.

All babies are different. Go according to the nature of your baby.

NOT all babies sleep through the night. Don't compare your's to others.

Sure, they say that by now, a baby does not have to feed during the middle of the night, and you can "train" him that way. But for me... if my kids were hungry, I fed them... on demand, still. To me, a baby will naturally start sleeping through the night... when they are ready, and a baby knows when they are hungry. Sure, you can use consistency and methods to "make" them sleep through the night... but then, this can sometimes over-look what a baby really needs at any given time. You have to be able to "adjust" too...to your baby... instead of sticking just to a "method."

Some babies just will not go back to sleep until they are fed. I have 2 friends, whose babies were constantly waking during the night and fussy... and not happy, but the parents would not feed them for fear of getting into a "bad" habit. Well... in one case, the Pediatrician told the Mom to get up and feed her son, that if the baby is waking, they need more intake. For the other case, the Mom starting increasing the amount she fed her baby...and lo and behold, the baby started sleeping better and was less fussy overall, and then started to gain better weight (he was a tiny baby). So...that is the hind-sight they experienced.

In our case, our Pediatrician advises feeding on demand for the first year.

I think it puts extra hardship on Parents when they expect a baby/child to sleep through the night, as a "norm." Because in reality, LOTS of babies don't sleep through the night. Or they will when they are taught that their needs will not be met. But I know everyone has different perspectives on it.

*If your baby is crying until he is being fed, as you said... then there you have your answer. He's hungry. You need to feed him. I don't think any adult would sleep very well either, if they were hungry and/or starving during the night. A baby needs to feed, if that is what they need. I personally would not deny a feeding, if that is what a baby needs...just to make him sleep through the night... at that point, who is the method for? Parent or baby?

All the best,
Susan

your baby is definitely old enough to be sleeping through the night without a feeding. my 8-month old has been doing it since we sleep trained him when he was 5 months old. to go www.sleepyplanet.com, get their book or dvd, and all of your problems will be solved in just a couple of nights. I am also a first time mom with a full time job, and believe me, this will change your life.

I went through a similar thing at that age recently and also for us, crying it out didn't work, she simply needed to be fed. I suggest dropping that third nap. Try to get him to only take two during the day. My baby sleeps two hours a day from 9-10 and from 2-3 and goes to bed at 7:00. Your baby's nap times seem really incondusive to a baby bed time of 7:00ish (which is when most babies go down for the night). Also very few babies are taking a third nap at this age- esspecially such long ones. Maybe tweaking the naps will get you better night time sleep.

What I did is get back to my original schedule I had her on as a new born from the book "on beeing baby wise". It suggests the order of eating and sleeping is the way to get a baby to sleep through the night. It seems like it shouldn't matter, but anticdotaly, when I did it the way the book recommended, she slept through the night and when I got off track- she didn't. The idea is that after feeding there should be a wakeful period followed by sleep. So an eat -wake -sleep pattern vs. an eat- sleep -wake pattern. Sounds silly but it has worked for me. Its hard though when you get into the habit of them getting sleeping in your arms with a bottle or breast feeding and putting them down for the nap. With the eat, wake, sleep pattern, the naps are a bigger struggle with lots of crying and protests, but the night times are great (feeding before the night time sleep is the only time that you do break the eat- wake -sleep cycle in this particular method). Anyways, it worked for us. Hope you find a solution, its hard to still be getting up at this stage in the game. Esspecially twice during the night! Definatly try some other methods.

I think he needs to move to two naps a day. 9AM and 1PM check out www.sleepyplanet.com Also, a nap at 6Pm is for sure going to interfere with is night sleep. No sleeping past 5PM. Hope this helps!

I don't have any advice on getting your son to sleep through the night, but I do want you to know that it does get better. It is hard working full time with a young one. I don't think there was a single minute during my son's first year that I didn't feel tired. Stick in there, it does get better.

What worked for us was feeding the baby solids 3 times a day...breakfast, lunch and dinner. Bottle or breastfeed 4-5 times a day and especially right before bedtime. I would cut out the late nap and then the daytime naps will get longer. Then put him down earlier. An 8 month old by nature will be ready for bedtime by 7pm.
When he wakes in the night, try just soothing him back to sleep instead of offering a feeding. It will take a few nights. Does he take a pacifier? That always works for us..and we rocked her back to sleep. Now, she still wakes in the night, but puts her self right back to bed knowing she will not get a feeding.

PS If teething is involved, which it might be at this age, it takes a few weeks for things to get back to "normal". It is a rough time and I think they need whatever it takes during that time to soothe them back to sleep.
Good Luck!

Have you read the No-Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantley? It has some great ideas, it's not an overnight wonder solution, but it's sensible and gentle.

Good luck, my daughter, Amy woke up 1-3x's a night for 2 years and then I had a son. He woke up 1x atleast for awhile. This is part of being a parent. It goes with the territory.

C., I'm sorry your son is not sleeping well, but I feel your pain. My daughter is almost 16 months and still wakes up 2 times a night to nurse. I had her down to one time a night at one point, but something always happens to shake her up again, like teething, a cold, or traveling. Is he teething and needs your comfort? What I have been trying to do is also skip a feeding by giving a binky and just holding her and giving her comfort. That works most of the time, but sometimes she is just relentless and I give in. It's hard not to give them what they want when they are upset and crying. Is he lean? My daughter is very petite and sometimes I think she just needs those calories at night. Well, anyway, good luck to you and I hope you find something that works for you and your son.

Homeopathic sleep spray! Works like a charm. A little spray in the mouth and your baby will rest peacefully thru the night. Safest thing you can use on a baby. Go to Lifewave.com/kherihealth to order or get more info.

I recommend limiting the naps he takes to 1 a day.

Hi, I'm having the same issue. My daughter is also 8 months old.
We put her to sleep at 8pm every night and she wakes up usually before midnight, then once or twice before getting up about 7:30 to start her day. If we're lucky she sleeps thru the night for about 6 hours.

I would recommend that you stop allowing him to take so many naps during the day. One, two hour nap should be sufficient (as I've read from many resources). My daughter naps every day from about 11:15-2:30 or so. It is very difficult to keep her up and entertained until 8 pm, but we take her for an evening walk for about an hour, give her a bath for 30 minutes and whatever else we can to keep her awake and not crying. If she is really fussy, we let her nap no later than 5pm- that way, she will be ready for bed at 8.

Also if you feed more during the day, that might work. Or, stretch out the feeding periods so that your son will be less used to the bottle so often.

Good luck! I know it's hard!

hi hristine, stop feeding him during the night, i know you said it didn't work, but you didn't give it enough time. unfortunaly this is one of the problems moms run into who breast feed. J. L.

Hello there! I have had the same problem with my son and he is now 15 months. He will only take 1 good nap now and still wakes up in the middle of the night for a feeding. I just have to go with the flow right now because it seems he's running the show. I've tried to ignore his cries in hoping he'll go back to sleep but he refuses. Its honestly much easier to get up to feed him then to hear him cry for nearly an hour. It will all work out eventually; at least I hope so

No help is needed. Your son is absolutely normal. Babies were designed to wake for nightly feedings. Feed him. Your son's sleep pattern will vary throughout his first several years. Just give him what he needs. You will have plenty of time to sleep through the night when he is older.

Aloha; I have added a teaspoon of fresh poi to our children's last bottle for the evening. There is also bottled powdered poi in the markets however if you choose not to use that I have used a teaspoon of baby cereal instead. I used that tsp. for a whole week and if that still didn't work, I'd add a wee bit more the following week until my child slept thru the night. Once my child got used to sleeping thru the night, I cut back on the cereal but then again I to use poi more than baby cereal.
Good luck to you. If time permits, let me know what worked out for you as my children
are all grown and my grandchildren were trained with my method bcuz my children were
lacking much sleep as tjhey dragged themselves out of bed for work after their children were
only 2 1/2 months old. A grammie from Maui.

i have an 8 month old and he would do that too until i started feeding him like three jars of baby food and both breasts full of milk right before bedtime.

it sounds like he just isnt getting enough dinner! if that doesnt work then it could also be that hes teething, but since you said he woke up for feedings then i would try adding extra solids at dinner.