My Daughter Doesn't Act like Herself When We Are at Gymnastics

I just got done reading an excellent book called "Parent Effectiveness Training" and this issue would fall under the category of a problem that your daughter "owns" meaning there is really nothing you can do about it. You can offer your empathy and listen to her if she can discuss it with you, but you can't solve it for her. I can remember being painfully shy in certain situations as a child and perfectly comfortable in others. Still am actually. I think this was just something I had to figure out for myself.

I totally agree about kids taking things in at their own pace. They learn by watching. Unless she is crying or saying she doesn't like it, I'd keep going.

You can't do anything for her except tell her how much fun she looks like she's having. Some kids go to these classes and do well from the beginning some come in and have to deal with it slowly. You have to let her deal with it on her own pace. If you talk to her about it it might make it worse. Because than she's is more aware of what others think and you don't want her to have to change how she's dealing with it to make you happy.

Hi there. You didn't say how LONG you have been going to the gymnastic place. I have a little guy in gymnastics and he loved it from the first, just to jump, move, climb, etc. Do they have non-structured time and how does she act there?? Have her play with you if there's unstructured time. It could be she's afaid of following directions (so not doing anything). And, with some kids I see it just takes time for them to adjust to the "routine". Just make sure she really likes it; "do you want to go to the gym or the park today"? Have fun!

Maybe she is just taking it all in... Maybe she thinks the rest of them look like a bunch of goof balls. I'd ask her why she doesn't dance or tumble later on in the day - like at dinner time. Ask her about the other kids. Ask about what they talk about... It could be that some snot nosed kid made fun of her tumble weeks ago... who knows?!

My LLB was a watcher until I signed her up for ice skating. That was her thing. (an expensive thing, but her thing) She stepped onto the ice and took off. Then she found other things that she liked to do like ballet and trumpet. She did karate for a while, too.

Let us know when you figure it out.
LBC

It could be the age? My daughter was a little shy when she was 2. I took her to lots of classes and activities. She usually joined in, but sometimes she just wanted to sit and watch. I think she was scared. But it's actually very good coping skill, that a child won't continue until they are sure it's "safe". There was no point trying to force her, since it would cause a tantrum, so she sat and observed. When she felt more confident, she started to play. I've also heard that sometimes, kids won't do an activity if they are afraid of failing or letting the parents down (isn't that sad?) Maybe she's intimidated by the other kids?

So, I wouldn't push her, but I'd keep bringing her to activities (like gymnastics). Maybe when you're at home you could try to ask her why she does/doesn't do certain things?