My Four Month Old Is Not Sleeping Through the Night...

Updated on October 02, 2006
J.W. asks from Alabaster, AL
23 answers

I've tried everything I can think of to get my 17 week old son to sleep through the night. He doesn't sleep much during the day but still wakes up twice during the night. I put him down around 9:30 (as late as I can keep him up) and he wakes up at 1 then again at 4. I've tried puting a little cereal in a bottle right before bed but that hasen't helped. I am nursing so maybe he can't seem to get full. Should I start him on solids or should I wait? I have been waiting on him to sleep through the night before I enforced a schedule. Now I'm afraid it's too late. Please, how can I get him to sleep more?

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So What Happened?

Thank you all so much for your advice and encouragement. I've just been told by almost everyone I know that my son should be fed cereal and should be sleeping through the night. I'm so glad to hear that there are moms out there who agree with me. I feel better hearing your stories and using your advice. Thank you and I will continue to brestfeed him and hold off on the cereal!

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K.R.

answers from Columbia on

I think you are suppose to wait until six months before solids(cereal and oatmeal). If you start to early they could be more likely to get food alergies. My daughter did not start sleeping through the night until she was closer to 8 months. I wouldn't think that you are not filling her up. Some children are just different and take a little longer in some areas. When you start her on oatmeal and cereal though I think you are suppose to just give them a certain amount because you have to still get the milk in them and you don't want them to cut back on that. I would suggest not giving the cereal until almost bed time...the last meal followed by a little milk to get it to expand in the stomache. This way he has a little more on his stomache when he sleeps. Good Luck I am feeling it for you. I was so excited the night that Hannah slept all night long.

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J.B.

answers from Columbia on

All chrildren are different.... but a 4 months I think that it is okay if they are not sleeping through the night yet. my daughter is 2 now and I do not think she slept throught the night until at least 6 months...maybe later. My best friends son did not stay a sleep until almost a year. As for the adding of cereal or baby food to the last bottle...it did not work for my daughter but its always worth a try...it works for some.

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S.O.

answers from Charlotte on

Sleeping through the night is a developmental thing, it has nothing to do with how much he eats and when, and when he goes to bed and/or how much he sleeps during the day. And he's breastfed. that doesn't mean he isn't getting plenty full, it means breastmilk is digested much faster (which is a good thing), so the baby may want to eat more often. It's also a matter of comfort. Some babies wake up to nurse not because they are hungry, but because they enjoy breastfeeding.
I don't know if he is breastfed exclusively or not, but if he is, wait to start solids. You'll know when he's ready, and it won't have anything to do with his sleeping patterns. Also, stop feeding him cereal in the bottle. That is the absolute worst thing you can do. I work at the health department, and I see so many moms doing this. This can lead to obesity, as they are just getting a ton of calories at one time, just pouring in their little mouths, also it is a huge choking hazard. What comes out of that bottle is much thicker than what the baby is used to. This may seem to help the baby sleep through the night, when all it is really doing is giving your baby a false sense of being full, because it takes so long for him to digest. It just sits on his stomach.
He's 4 months old, don't fret over him waking up a couple times during the night...my son didn't sleep through the night for well over a year! Each baby is different. Enjoy your alone time with him at night, watching him fall back asleep. It's precious and doesn't last forever, though you will notice, you will always have nights where your child will wake up in the middle of the night, no matter how old! Cuddle with him when he wakes up, and nurse him back to sleep. If he's sleeping with you, you won't really lose any sleep, as all you have to do is roll over and nurse and you will both fall asleep within a minute or two. Don't worry about your milk not being enough. It's more than enough. Babies all over the world live off of breastmilk ALONE for the first year of their lives.

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D.H.

answers from Birmingham on

Dear J.,

I know how frustrating it can be to still be operating on interrupted sleep. So many books say that the baby should be sleeping through the night (as early as four weeks) and everyone has a friend whose baby slept through the night as soon as they came home from the hospital. Truthfully, though, normal is more what you are describing. In fact I would say that your baby is probably sleeping better than most. A breastfed baby absorbs milk more rapidly and needs more feedings than a formula fed baby. You are probably producing plenty of milk and your baby is getting full with each feeding, but just can't go all night yet without nursing once or twice. That will probably change once you introduce solids, but I wouldn't let the fact that he is still waking prompt you to do introduce solids earlier than you are comfortable with. Generally babies do not need any thing but breast milk for the first six months of life and but you can begin them as early as four months. None of my three kids would eat anything until they had teeth, so they were almost exclusively breastfed until they were 9- 12 months old. The only real benefit to introducing solids as early as six months is to help broaden their tastes and preference to a variety of healthy foods.

Do what seems best for you and always consult your doctor, but if your son is growing normally you can be sure he is getting everything he needs from breast milk. My experience is that cereal at bedtime didn't help them sleep more. Try to nap during the day to catch up on needed sleep (sometimes taking the baby to bed with you will help him nap for longer periods).

Bless you! You are doing an awesome job and your son is very blessed. Be encouraged that you aren't doing anything wrong.

D.

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L.K.

answers from Raleigh on

I think you might actually be keeping him up too late. Try putting him down a little earlier so he isn't so overtired. Unless your doctor okays it, don't give him solids yet. It could cause him to develop food allergies. Finally, he probably isn't hungry at 1 if you are feeding right before bed. When he wakes up at 1, put him back to sleep however you normally do, but don't feed him. He'll learn that he doesn't need to wake up then.

HTH.
L.

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B.B.

answers from Raleigh on

hello...in my experience 4 month olds generally do not sleep through the night. BFing can make somewhat of a difference in the fact that BF babies do eat more often, but usually at this age a baby needs to eat in the middle of the night, regardless of how much (or what) you feed him. Feeding hims solids is fine as long as he wants them, but i wouldnt do it with the intention of it aiding in him sleeping longer.
pretty much the only thing that will decide when he will sleep is him. we will when he's ready. and they're usually not yet.
you might not think so now, but all this will be gone soon and as much as you might want sleep now, take advantage of your 1am cuddles. Soon enough they will be gone and you'll be wondering where your baby went...

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T.D.

answers from Asheville on

J.,
I think your expectations are too high at this point. I've never known a four month old to sleep through the night. My oldest son didn't sleep through the night until he was 16 months old, and I have a six month old who doesn't sleep through the night yet, either. I'm guessing someone told you that he should be sleeping all night now? If so, I think they are mistaken. My doctor told me that babies need to be fed through the night when they wake up at least until six months of age. After that they are waking up due to habit and not because they should be hungry. ( I guess because at that point they are on baby food also) Getting up at 1 and 4 seem just right to me.

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D.H.

answers from Asheville on

HI J.,

I guess the first thing you need to accept is that you may not sleep through the night for a very long time!! Your little baby needs you. He is still tiny!! He probably is hungry. And when he gets bigger, he may just need you for comfort. I know it sucks, I have a nine month old that still wakes 2-4 times. I tried the cry thing briefly then realized that she is only a baby for a short time and it is my job to take care of her. Now, my heart wouldn't be broke if she did sleep through the night, but until then, I will respond to her.

good luck!!

D.

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S.F.

answers from Charlotte on

I agree with some of the other mommies - 'through the night' is 5 hours for a baby that young usually - SOME LUCKY MOMS experience 10-12 hour stretches early, but not me. My son didn't sleep through the night on MY schedule until 6 months old. He, too awoke 2 times up til about 4.5 months, then down to 1 time, then none.

Be patient with him. And I always suggest the 'no cry sleep solution' this book worked wonders for us to get our little guy to sleep longer stretches without the whole 'cry it out' ordeal.

You're doing great, and some moms are envious of you for only getting up twice. There's moms who get up 3-4 times a night with some high needs babies!

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J.E.

answers from Richmond on

Hi J.,

I concur with the other moms here. No need to worry! This is normal for a breastfed baby. While some parents choose to try solids, I would advise against it till 5-6 months. We started at 5 1/2 months (and only then because she was LUNGING at all food).

My daughter is 6 1/2 months old and still breastfeeds between 1-2 times a night. She is up a lot when she loses her pacifier as well. It stinks ... I want my sleep! But I do realize that this is normal. It IS frustrating when you hear about other babies doing it... however, as someone mentioned, sometimes it's weight-related; sometimes it's temperament, etc.

Hang in there! Man, I want my sleep, too! It will get better!

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K.D.

answers from Raleigh on

From my own esperience with my daughter, we started her on solids early (size 1 foods). It did seem to help with her but I know that breastfeeding is hard and you don't always know how much he may be getting so you could always pump and measure it in a bottle or as I did after that didn't work for me, you can start him on formula...it was a lifesaver and a timesaver for me. I will say that babies will wake up if they are hungry so he may not be eating enough to keep him full. Hope this helps. Good luck.

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S.H.

answers from Charlotte on

How much does your child weigh? Sleeping throught the night has less to do with age, and more to do with weight. Between 13-15# he should start sleeping through the night. Also try swaddling him. Try the Miricle Blanket. I swaddle my 14# 2 month old and he JUST started sleeping through the night. Also, when he wakes for his 1 and 4 feedings, try shortenting them to about 5 min. Then start just going in and picking him up but not feeding him, then just go in and not pick him up, but soothi him. But wait until he is at least 13#.

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H.E.

answers from Birmingham on

Stay with the cereal but continue to add a little more. I started cereal at about 8 weeks, and my son was sleeping through the night (well from about 10pm - 5am) by 10 weeks. The cereal worked so well that I stopped breast feeding (combined with the fact that I went back to work and I wasn't really producing enough).

Your son's waking is probably a combination of both hunger and habit. Maybe try the extra cereal and let him cry a little longer and see if that helps. I'm not saying let him wail for an hour, but don't feed him immediately, especially if you have given him more cereal that night.

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C.M.

answers from Charlotte on

I dont really have any advice to give, however, my son is 10 months old and still gets up every night!! it is better than it used to be. He has always been like that. He just doesnt like to sleep. I took him to the dr and everything. He fights sleep like no one else can! He even started getting up at 1 or 2 am and staying up till about 4 am! (when he was 2-3 months) It has gotten better. When he was like 6 months, it slowed down to just waking up 1-2x a night for a feeding. Now mind you, he eats, and eats well. He just doesnt like to be asleep. Even to this day to get him to nap is just almost non existant. We pretty much have to let him just pass out. We have tried everything. You can rock him and he will then go to sleep, but, I am prego with our (4th) and last, and I cant keep doing that since I am getting bigger now.

I also must say that I have recently been told it is not ok to put cereal in bottles due to choking hazards. I had NO IDEA of this! I mean my next to older child is 6 yrs,,, and back then, i was told it was ok.... and I was giving cereal to my son in his bottle, until I found out its not ok anymore. My husb still does it even though I have asked him not to. He says that all our kids are fine and we did it with them and he is fine as well. I think that sometimes people forget that we dont all hear the same thing, or we dont know any better.

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D.S.

answers from Raleigh on

He is probably not getting enough substance in his feeding. At 3 months I was mixing cereal with both of my little girls in the last bottle of the day before bed. I did this for about a week or so, and then I started adding stage one baby food to the formula/milk in the last bottle of the day.

Then when you see that they have the signs for spoon feeding, which is mostly tongue control to keep them for choking and strangaling then you need to start with the spoon feeding.

Keep in mind that if the baby food in the bottle only seems to work for a while and then he starts getting up again, then he may need baby food added to his bottle throughout the day.

I know you are nursing so you may need to express your milk and use a bottle if you don't already in order to do this.

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T.T.

answers from Birmingham on

J.! It is NORMAL that your 4 month old isn't sleeping through the night. One theory is that night waking in infants is a natural protective thing against SIDS...whether that's true or not, it IS certainly developmentally normal! I am also blessed to stay at home with my son and so I napped one nap with the baby most days and decided not to worry about night waking. Some babies naturally sleep through the night at a young age and others are "sleep trained" to do so. Really how you handle it depends a lot on your parenting style. My personal opinion is that he'll sleep through the night when he's ready but many people report success with "feberizing" their babies. I hope you feel encouraged knowing your son is doing what is natural, normal, and healthy for babies!

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S.M.

answers from Mobile on

My 6 month old daughter started teething at around 3 months old, and so she went from sleeping through the night to up all the time. Its a possibility that your little one could be going through the same thing. And as for solids, i believe my daughter was 4 months when we started. Start with a vegetable, like green beans or carrots. They will let you know if they arent ready by turning away or spitting it all out. Hopefulle this helps some.

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J.

answers from Spartanburg on

i'm having the same problem. she used to sleep 6 hours at night, now i'm lucky if she sleeps 3. she ends up in my bed at around 3 am because it's just easier.

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K.R.

answers from Raleigh on

I think your son is young for you to expect him to sleep through the night, especially sence you are breastfeeding. HANG in there, though- dont stop breastfeeding!! And please, dont put cereal in his bottle!! That is very unhealthy for him.

He will sleep through the night when he is ready. For now, I would just nap durring the day when he does.

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J.H.

answers from Charlotte on

My son is a little over 4 months old and has been sleeping through the night (so far) for about 2-3 weeks. When we took him for his four month check up and the pediatrician said his sleeping through the night was normal because he was a bigger baby. He's 17 lbs, 5 oz now. That might explain one reason why your baby doesn't sleep through the night. We haven't started feeding him solids yet; it is basically a myth that feeding them solids will help. I also read that no matter how late you put your baby down, they still have this internal schedule and will get up when they need to. Just remember every baby is different. I would suggest what everyone else says and sleep when he sleeps! That's what I had to do. Good luck and it sounds like you're doing a terrific job!

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R.C.

answers from Raleigh on

I'm R. and my son Kent is 13 months old and I still can't get him to sleep on a regular basis as much as I would like him too and my doctor said it may be 15-18 months before he will start to sleep more soundly and thru the night. I did find that by keeping him up later that he really needed to go down earlier because he was over tired so maybe try putting him to bed earlier instead of later and the cereal should definitely help. However feed it to him on a spoon instead of the bottle. I'd try giving it to him in the morning and in the evening. Maybe it will help with naps as well.

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H.E.

answers from Columbia on

My son was nursed (or drank expressed milk at the babysitters) for the first 8 months. However, I did introduce cereal at around 4 months. Not because he wasn't sleeping through the night, but because he was not satisfied during the day with just milk. I think the last straw was when he drank 40 oz of milk in less than 8 hours. In the words of my babysitter, "He's a big boy. That milk just isn't enough."
I didn't put cereal in the bottle. I mixed it with breast milk & fed it with a spoon.

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T.P.

answers from Charlotte on

Youmight be expecting more than your son is ready for right now. My son still woke up twice per might until he was 5 months old then he started waking up once around months old. He is now nearly 16 months old and unless he is totally exhausted from a busy day of play he still doesn't sleep well at night.

He will wake up now if he misplaced his paci. Last night he woke up whining nearly every hour on the hour which is rare but each time I got up and went in to check on him, gave him his paci, and laid him back over in his bed. It seems that every time he is going through a growth spurt his sleeping, eating, and nap schedule is completely different then he goes back in a week or two to his old schedule.

My son had to have cereal in every bottle from the time he was 2 months old which was prescribed by a Dr. to help him keep his formula down so even with cereal it didn't keep him from waking up. Give it a month or two and you should start seeing a difference.

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