My Friend's Dad Passed Away :(

Updated on February 07, 2012
C.R. asks from Olathe, KS
11 answers

My friend's dad passed away very unexpectantly on Friday. We have been friends for 25 years now, and I really want to do something for her mom. My problem is I live in Kansas and her mom is in Montana. Do you mamas/dads have any ideas that I could do for her? The family does not want flowers or plants so that is out. Unfortunately, I can't go to the funeral either. I am bummed because they all are like family to me. I appreciate any and all ideas you can give me. Thanks in advance!

Also, any ideas that I could do for my friend when she gets back into town on Saturday?

1 mom found this helpful

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J.G.

answers from Minneapolis on

one of the nicest things ive seen as a token is http://www.spoonfulofcomfort.com
You can send a chicken noodle soup sympathy basket. After my father passed my mom couldn't eat for about 2 weeks except for soup broth and almonds, so when I saw this I thought to always keep it in mind for situations like you've mentioned.

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╰.M.

answers from Myrtle Beach on

Sorry for your loss!
When my dad passes away this past May, My sister in law sent me personalized wind chimes with my dad's name, birth date, death date, and a beautiful poem. It was the nicest gift I received!! Let me know if you want the website she got it from!
As far being there for your friend on Saturday, just be there for her! Maybe make a few dinners she can freeze!

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J.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

I've sent food from Omaha Steaks.

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H.M.

answers from Dallas on

I would see if you could find out or if you knwo what resteraunts are near by and send her a gift card for food. I know when my dad passes away no one felt like cooking. I am so sorry for your loss!!

2 moms found this helpful

K.B.

answers from Salt Lake City on

With the internet, hopefully you will be able to see/ read the obituary or ask your friend what paper it was published in. A lot of times people will have in the obituary a favorite charity or organization of the deceased or there will be a fund with a credit union/bank that you could send money too. Plus, it will jog your memory of some things about her father's life that you could mention in a note or verbally to your friend or her Mother. That would be a nice idea. Then send a personal note to her mom with possibly some additional cash/check or a gift card to a restaurant or coffee shop she likes. As for your friend, see if you can get just the two of you together and get a cup of coffee/tea, a bite to eat somewhere and be the listening ear your friend will need. A card is always nice too. I kept all of mine my friends gave me and my dad died almost 12 years ago. I read them when I needed some comfort...

1 mom found this helpful

K.M.

answers from Chicago on

Yeah, I would send food too, do they have a favorite place to eat that you can have send dinner?

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T.M.

answers from Philadelphia on

I was going to suggest Omaha Steaks also. They have some really delicious options.

D.D.

answers from New York on

How about sending your friend's mom a card and write a note sharing a rememberance of her husband? When my father died a friend of mine shared stories with my mom about things she did with our family and how much she appreciated being included.

As far as your friend I'd say be there to listen. The grieving process can take a very long time. If she has children offer to watch them so she can get some me time. See if she wants to go out for coffee. Call just to say hi.

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T.H.

answers from Kansas City on

I think a nice card with memories is a great idea, as others suggested. As far as for your friend, I think the best thing you can do is to remember his date of death and keep on top of it. For the first year every month on that day she is going to be thinking about it, so just be there for her and maybe take her out for coffee or give her a phone call and be sure to mention why you're calling. My dad died 4 years ago and after time passes people forget. Some of my best friends, even my husband, doesn't remember the date without being told. I have two friends who know the date and call me each year to make sure I'm okay and it's honestly the best support I could ever get, just to know that he is not forgotten and that they know I need a little extra TLC on that day. I'm sorry for your loss as it seems he was very important to you as well.

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S.A.

answers from Kansas City on

Send a nice card and write some fond memories in there. Ask if there is a charity, hopital to donate to.
Make a nice homemade meal and a card and take it to your friend. She'll appreciate that very much.
It's hard to know what to say and/or what to do. I personnely appreciated everyones cards and kinds words.

V.C.

answers from Dallas on

I second writing to her. She will hear from a lot of people at first, so make sure to call or write her later on also.
Do you know someone in her neighborhood you could hire to shovel snow or do other things she might need done around the house. Or get her a gift certificate from a maid service.

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