My Mother in Law Had a Nervous Breakdown. What Do I Do?

When something happens to my family members far off in another state, I feel so uncomfortably powerless. I remember when my brother had an asthma attack that was so bad he almost died. My nephew was diagnosed as autistic and I'm too far away to help. It's hard because I really would like to help them so much! I try to do things like send care packages, inspirational cards of encouragement, etc. This makes me feel a little better. I also pray in these times that they be taken care of. It seems so small, but it really does help me with my feelings of frustration concerning my lack of ability to help out due to distance. I've also been available to fly out if any of my family ever needs short term help from me and make sure they know that. My sister-in-law was hospitalized with a form of pneumonia they couldn't seem to beat and things were very scary for a while. I flew out to help my brother out while she was in the hospital (he's a lawyer plus they have two children). I wasn't there long, but I know they needed and really appreciated the help.

not much advice here on this subject...my sister has terminal breast cancer and my mother has breast cancer and all I want to do is move and be with them..but I don't know if that is a good financial decision...so if find out anything about helping relatives long distance let me know.. thanks

I am sorry you MIL is struggling. I had a nervous breakdown 7 years ago, but it was not so severe that I had to be hospitalized. I started anti-depressants and therapy and it saved my life! I'm sure she will receive great care while in hospital. Is your husband and his family surprised by this development, or did they see it coming? If they are shocked, try to be sympathetic and offer a shoulder to lean on and be a good listener, keeping in mind that they probably won't know what they need right now. Could your husband make a quick trip to FL to see how his dad is? Could you? Could you or your husband speak to her doctors by phone? Maybe do some research on the internet to see what is recommended for family members in this situation. If you can gather some info, it might help to pass it on to your husband and other family members. If your MIL can talk on the phone, reassure her that you guys love her and support her. Mental health problems are still an invisible illness that many find embarrassing. Try to be open and think of how you would react if it were another type of diagnosis, like cancer or a heart attack. Send her flowers or a card from you and your family. I hope she feels better soon.

First of all there is no such thing as a nervous breakdown. When people are put in the hospital for 72 hours it usually means that they have an emotional condition such as bi-polar disorder or clinical depression both of which can be life threatening. Hospitalization usually occurs when that person is being seen as a threat to themselves or the people around them. If the person is bi-polar they could be experiencing a state of mania which can cause an array of emotions to powerful for them to cope with on their own. I would need more details to understand what is going on. But I think the best way for you to be supportive of your mother-in-law and your husband and his family is to educate yourself as much as possible about mood disorders and depression. Knowledge is power right. Patience will also be very important as will compassion, try not to judge her. Read as much as you can. Have they given her a diagnosis yet? Once you get that go and get some books at the library and get on-line and learn about it. Good luck to all of you.