My One Year Old and Breastfeeding

My son is 14 months old and is no where near wanting to stop breastfeeding. If you hear of any ideas on how to stop, please let me know.
H.

Hi, I breast fed my son and around one I started only nursing him when he asked. I gradually started distracting him with other things until eventually he was down to once or twice a day. He stopped asking around 15 months except for once every 2 or 3 days, and the last time I nursed him was around 16 or 17 months. I just let him decide when he was ready, because like some of the other responses, I felt like it was much more than just a feeding attachment and did not want him to feel like I was just cutting him off cold turkey. I did the same with my daughter and although it took her a little longer, she was down to once every few days by about 17 months, but it lingered until she was about 22 months. She is 2.5 now and will occasionally still ask if she sees them, but I just turn it into a joke with her and she forgets and laughs it off.

Congrats on the great job that you have done and keeping up the nursing for a year. Whatever you decide at this point, you know that you have given your baby a gift for a lifetime!

You've gotten great respsonses so far. Letting your son breastfeed isn't going to harm him in any way, more than likely it will help him. He seems to still need the breast. My son stopped when he was 2 because of a car accident we were in. I wasn't able to pick him up or hold him and he spent many nights with my parents, so breastfeeding just stopped. But because I had to stop cold turkey, I noticed it affecting him in negative ways. He became very very clingy and needy and just very unlike himself. He's always been very attatched, but he was beyond attatched. I started breastfeeding again, and slowly weaned, letting him decide when he was ready to move on. Forcing a child to give up something that is a huge comfort to them can be very stressful on that child and cause problems later. Trust issues, as well as others.
Offer distractions, and if he takes it, great, but if still wants to nurse, let him nurse a little.
Now, if you are completely against breastfeeding any longer, then you will have to find ways to gently wean him (again, distractions, lots of touching, lots of one on one time, snuggling, ect..). But gently. Don't make a big deal out of it. Let him think he's the one deciding to move on, so he doesn't feel he's being deprived of something he loves!
And remember, breastfeeding does not lose any of it's benefits after a year! None! Still all the same wonderful benefits, plus it can help a stressful one year old, it helps teach independence, believe it or not. All together, it's a good thing! Even at one!

Please Please Please do NOT cut him off!!! He is still wanting to have that bond with you! It is a good thing and when he is ready to stop breastfeeding, he will let you know!! I have successfully breastfed 2 children and am working on a 3rd now. My daughter and son both weaned themselves when they were ready. My new daughter is 8 months old and is still avidly breastfeeding with no intention of stopping anytime soon! She won't even take a sippy cup yet, and bottles??? Forget it! LOL. Just let him continue to nurse as long as he will....it is the best thing for him afterall!!!
Hope that helps!

Breastfeeding past the first year is more common than you may think. The World Health Organization recommends breastfeeding until AT LEAST 24 months and then for however long after is mutually desired by mother and child. The baby's immune system isn't fully developed until at least age 2 and sometimes as late as age 6. Your milk provides that immune support his body needs to fight infections. The world average age for weaning is between 3.5 and 4 years old. Also, the sucking instinct is still strong in many children sometimes until the elementary school years. Hence why you see children sucking thumbs a lot.

My daughter is 17 months and she still nurses between 4 and 8 times a day depending on if she's teething or otherwise not feeling well. It's the most efficient way to soothe her when she's hurt or tired. And since she won't suck a pacifier I've never had to worry about her walking around with ugly button mouth.

If your little bean is going for the breast more often than you'd like, try offering a drink in a cup or a snack or other delay tactics. Also try shortening nursing sessions. As to the shirt grabbing, take his hand away from your shirt and say "No". This is as much of teaching nursing manners as when you taught him not to bite you. If you can't get a hold of the local LLL (have had trouble with not having phone calls returned) try a book called "Mothering your nursing toddler" and there is a yahoo group called extended_nursing that is a great source of support. The yahoo group has moms from all over the world, some who are tandem nursing and have nurslings that are as old as 5. So these ladies have been there and done that and are a great resource.

If nothing else, pat yourself on the back for making it this far with your nursing relationship. American culture doesn't always make it easy for us to do the right or best things for our babies at any age. You've given your son a wonderful gift!

I don't think cold turkey is a good way to wean. Some children are really attached to the breast. My son is one of them. Keep in mind that breastfeeding is more than about giving your child milk. It is comfort, security, immunity. Being that it's winter and there are a bunch of nasty viruses going around, I wouldn't cut it out completely. He'll be able to fight off sickness a lot better.

Try to cut down on your nursing sessions over time. Give yourself at least until the end of the season. It will be a lot less painful on you (engorgement) and a lot less traumatic on him. When he tries to nurse, try redirecting him. I noticed if my son was preoccupied, he wouldn't think to nurse until he needed it. Offer food and drink first.

Also contact La Leche League. They do help with weaning.

May I ask why you're weaning him? It is something you feel led to do just because he's reached the magicial first birthday? Extended breastfeeding can be a wonderful thing, and toddlers still get enormous benefit from continuing the nursing relationship. :)

I would say to not give in to him. He needs to learn how to survive without breast feeding. However, there should be a way to do it without hurting his feelings. He likes the bonding between you two that takes place during the feedings. You need to stop giving in but I don't know the best way to handle that situation. I will try to get back to you on that. D.

If you don't want to breastfeed anymore or you're uncomfortable with his behavior, then stop him all together and shortly the behavior will end. You'll need to find something he really likes to distract him at these times and give him a cup, so he's not hungry/thirsty. Now if you don't mind still nursing him and are okay with letting him wean naturally, I am still nursing my 20 month old. I only nurse right before he goes to bed and when he first wakes up and I find this helps, since he is nursing, he doesn't try during the day. Around dinner time, because he's getting tired, he still does some of these behaviors but if I give him a drink, he usually stops. He mostly puts his hand in my shirt when he's tired or lifts my shirt, but I think it's more for comfort than he really wants to nurse, because he associates nursing with comfort mostly now. So I just remove his hand and ignore it and not making a big deal seems to get him to stop. Hope this helps.

i was just telling a new mom this story yesterday: i had a friend who adopted her daughter at 3 months and they never had the chance to breastfeed. When the daughter was about 13 months old she started "asking" to nurse same kind of ways your son is. so my friend offered her the breast and for a few months they had a lovely time nuzzling, cuddlng and deeping their bond. it's not all about milk/food.

This is all typical and normal behavior. I weaned my little boy at one year old also. He did the same. Start weaning slowly. First decide which feeding you want to cut out breast first and replace just that feeding with a sippy cup or bottle. I went straight to sippy cups. He did excellent with those. I started cutting out just his lunch feeding and replacing it with his cup. Since this was his most active time and he didn't want to lay still for feeding anyways. After 2 weeks of that. I then added taking away his morning feeding. Replacing it with a cup. So now he's morning & lunch with a cup. Last and longest to go was his night feeding. He night fed for another month and a half b/f weaning off of it completely. But slow and consistent is the key.

I breastfeed all 3 of mine and w/ each one I just cut them off and handed them a cup. He'll be fussy at first of course but won't take long if you stick to your guns.

I am not there yet, but I agree with the previous poster. Take your time with it. My little one is 9.5 mths. Our plan is to start weaning at 11 months. We will do it one feeding at a time over the course of a month to two months. It will be a bit easier for us because we do two expressed bottles a day (I work full time). Our pediatrician said that there is normally one feeding a day that is really hard to get rid of (will either be the first one or the last one of the day) because of comfort reasons.

Trying to quit cold turkey seems like a very abrupt change to what you have been teaching your little one to do for the last year. Good luck!!!

You have to do what is best for you and your child. If it is really important for you to stop breastfeeding, then try things like hugging him and being close to him while you give him the cup, so that he gets that feeling of comfort and closeness to you that he got breastfeeding. But it sounds like he still really wants to nurse, and if it isn't too hard for you, you should breastfeed him as long as you/he wants to. Don't let anyone pressure you into thinking you should wean if you and your son are not ready. Some health organizations recommend at least two years of breastfeeding. Good luck!