My Son Thinks I Ate My Baby!

Looks like you got some good responces already but I just thought I'd share too. What my cousin did was tell her other children that daddy gave her a baby seed, and she ate it, and it takes a while for the baby to grow before it can come out. It was right around spring time and they were planting a garden and they understood that seeds grow into plants. So she went with that analogy.

I'm 10 weeks prego with my 2nd, and I have a 17 month old. though I dont think he will be old enough to ask those kinds of questions since he'll be 2 when the baby is born, I'm wondering how I should try to explain it myself when I get bigger. lol Good luck.

Have you taught your son about GOD...if so it should be pretty easy. At 3 years old..God put him in my tummy and I am keeping him safe, just like I did for you, until he is ready to join us.

M.-
That is soo funny! Write that one down!! :)

I don't what your beliefs are, but you could tell him God helps babies grow in Mommies tummys to keep them safe until they are ready to be in the world with us.

(I love your story too Mia!) -LOL, kids are so great!

C.

I think its adorable and that you need to write that in his babybook! however, that doesn't really resolve him being mad at you...I would just tell him, that is where babies grow inside your tummy..good luck

My son is terrified that every time he has a stomach ache it's because there's a baby growing inside his tummy. His rationale is that he knows it can happen, because he saw his (very pregnant) aunt with a huge tummy. So, we had a little talk.

Be as honest as you're comfortable with, and don't offer too much overwhelming information. I was told (when I asked for his "tummy ache" advice) that usually they don't need a big, long answer that's overwhelming. Encourage him to ask specific questions, and answer those.

Others have offered much better advice, and I look forward to reading more of that, since we're going through something similar. Good luck!

i think for a while my daughter thought the same thing... (i'm due in june 2009 too)... my daughter is 2.5... she'd pat my tummy and say "new baby"... then pat her own and say "blueberries... pancakes, milk!"... whatever she'd eaten recently. I just told her that I didn't eat the new baby, just that the new baby was too little to come out yet and that mommy was keeping it safe in there until it was time for the baby to come home with us. she would then pat her tummy and say "new baby"... and I would just explain that only mommy's can have babies in their tummies...

of course, this didn't stop her from patting my husbands belly and saying "oh, daddy has big baby"... a couple weeks later. (he's put on a few pounds along with me during this pregnancy)... anyway, again we had the chat about only mommy's and not daddy's or big girls like her have babies.

anyway, just be honest and keep it simple.. 3 is too young for the "rest" of the story...

Great responses from other parents- and I would just echo the book idea. Go to the library or look online for books about this. I'm an Usborne Books consultant, and we have a cute one for children your sons age called the Flip Flap Body Book. It was a wonderful help for my little girls when I got pregnant with my son. It explains in really simple terms how a baby is made and has flaps they can lift to show inside the mommy's tummy, how the baby grows and grows, and more. You can see it on www.ubah.com/M2115, and you can buy it online or from any consultant local to you if you like it. Good luck and congratulations on having a bright little boy who will analyze a situation and come up with his own unique conclusions ! :)

Oh M....I'm sorry :-)! Little boys are funny with what they come up with. I agree with most of the other Moms in just explaining that it is a "special" place...maybe show him a picture from the internet that isn't gross/scary to him, but shows a real picture of the baby in the sac and/or maybe a fake picture with the mommy and her organs so you can point to your stomach and then to the baby and show him that they aren't in the same place. I bet there are age appropriate books either at the store or online that you can buy to help explain the issue better to your son. I just google'd "explaining pregnancy children" and got several good hits. My mom used the book "A Child Is Born" to help explain pregnancy to me when my brother and sister were born (I was 6 and 7 when they were born) which has really cool pictures of the baby inside the mommy (has one picture of the baby coming out, but if you aren't ready to explain that part yet, you could just cover that picture up for now). I would go to Amazon and search for the title and several other titles also popped up, so you can see what would work best for you (A Child is Born is an older book, but the pictures were cutting edge for the time...and still hold true today)...my mom just sent me her old copy of the book...brought back lots of memories.

My son is only 17 months, but he will lift my shirt and pat my belly and say "my baby"...but will then pat his own tummy and say "baby" too (he calls his belly button a "baby button"...so cute) but because baby and belly sound alike, I haven't pushed the issue too much beyond just saying "no, that's your tummy, only mommy's have babies in their belly".

Another cute story...I was breastfeeding my son and my neice (who was 2 at the time) came in and asked what I was doing. I told her my son was eating and she wanted to know what he was eating, so I said milk...she looked at me confused (she was just learning the difference between eating and drinking)...then got this "Ah ha" look and said "Oh, he's DRINKING milk and eating blueberries (her favorite food)..." It gave us all a good laugh because then she had to go tell the WHOLE family what my son was doing. If that's the case, no WONDER breastfeeding hurts so much to start...gotta get used to those blueberries coming out!!!

"I'm sharing my food with him until he's big enough to eat. Being in my tummy protects him. You were in my tummy before you were born, too. Do you want to see pictures?"

http://www.babycenter.com/pregnancy-fetal-development-index

that is Hilarious!! I'm sure that will be a story you find yourself telling again and again. I think the best thing to do with kids that age is to be honest but vague. When I was pregnant and my oldest was 3, he wanted to know how the baby got there too. I tried just telling him that's where babies grow. He asked how it got there and I explained that it's like when his preschool class planted seeds in pots and flowers grew - Mommies and daddies plant baby seeds - and then I quickly changed the subject.

Best of all things to you and your wonderful, growing family!

When we have been expecting while at the same time had young children, we explained to them that there was a special place inside of mommy where the baby grows. It's not the same place that the food goes. We didn't go into details about how the baby got in there, but did make sure they knew that it wasn't the same way food goes in. When they would ask more questions we would answer in an age appropriate way, or tell them that when they are older we will explain more because they will be able to understand it better. They took this explanation of pregnancy very well.

Hi M.,

This is not funny, but it is kind of cute. I suggest that you tell you son the facts. I think that if you can find a book that shows in simple drawings a woman's insides you can explain that his brother is really in your womb, and not in your stomach. Even though it will be more than he will really understand, it might help. Heck, you can even make a drawing youself. Simple stomach with a womb beneath. My husband and I always try to tell our son the facts of how things work, and it seems to keep him less confused. Of course, you don't have to tell him how brother got into your womb! Good luck. I'd love to hear how you solve this, if you don't mind following up with us when you come to an answer for yourselves.
Dita

After I stopped laughing...this one was funny, I'm sure its not to you and your son who truly thinks you ate your baby. But, I agree with the other mom on here who suggests that you explain the difference between stomach and uterus in 3 year old language. I think he needs an anatomy lesson so that he can conquer this fear and not live in fear that he is next...lol...too cute.

I know 3 seems early for sex ed. . . but I have a little problem with all the posters that said to keep on saying that the baby is in your TUMMY - it's not true and obviously confusing.

You can tell him that mommies have a special place for growing the baby separate from where the food goes without getting too graphic and help him make sense of it. My first who was 3 1/2 when I was preg. with #2 asked where it comes out! I just said we have a place for pee, a place for poop, and mommies have a place where the baby comes out - and that was all he needed.

Don't be afraid to tell your son the truth - appropriate for his age. He will be less confused, happier, learn a little about bodies - boys & girls - all good.

How cute. I would just explain that babies grow inside mommy's tummy until they are strong enough to grow by themselves. And explain that is how he grew at first too. Maybe show him pitures of when you were pregnant with him and let him know that he came out fine and his brother will too. Hope this helps. Good luck! Congrats.

I would show him big belly mommy pictures when you talk to him to show him when you were pregnant with him and if you can get/have some other moms he is close to, such as aunts or friend's moms. This might help him understand that all babies grow inside mommies, you could even show him other mammals, and compare them to baby birds that hatch from eggs. Maybe if he realizes this is normal, he will be more at ease.

I say play along: get a Kangaroo, show him the pocket and explain how the baby goes in there to be taken care of, but for you just say that your belly button doesn't come undone until the baby is ready to come out. Then he can get the "separate but not eaten" concept. I hope. Good luck with that one!! ;D

I would just be honest with him. Tell him you didn't eat him, but that is where he grows until he is ready to come out. Explain that the baby needs to get strong enough to live outside of you and that until he is, he will be in you.
You can decide how technical you get about it not really being your belly ect.

I'm a fan of using correct terminology and being honest with children about life issues, such as how babies happen. Of course, I'm not talking about having a big sex talk at this point, but it is entirely appropriate for a 3 year old to be taught the difference between a "tummy/stomach" and a "belly/uterus." It would certainly settle his mind that mommies' bodies are made with special places to grow babies and that babies aren't mixed up down there with dinner :0)

Just keep it real and you and your husband will always be the "body" experts to your son. As he grows up he'll know you always tell him the truth and that he can trust you with his questions. He'll also know he can trust your advice. If you make up silly stories, you'll always have to backpeddal later...

Congrats on the new baby!

Okay, I have to laugh because I was kinda in the same situation when I was pregnant. My dad told my neice (5) and nephew(7) that I ate a baby when I was pregnant with my first. My neice came up to me when I was about 6 months along and said "Grandpa said you ate a baby and thats how you got a baby in your belly" I said "grandpa is silly huh" she "ya????, How did you get a baby in your belly?" Yikes I wasn't prepared to answer that!I'll let their mom explain that one. LOL. No advise here just let you know I was kinda in the same boat one. :) happy pregnancy!

I am trying hard not to laugh!!! That is the cutest thing I think I have ever heard, have to video tape that conversation...
Okay, not sure if it will help but maybe get some seeds (flower or vegetable), some dirt and a pot. Tell him that the baby is like the seed, it is in mommy's tummy like the dirt to protect it, that it starts out small then grows. And until it grows so big that it can come live out on it's own it stays in your stomach.
Have him grow a plant right along with your being pregnant.
Tell him like the plant you have to rest and eat healthy so the baby can grow, like you have to water the plant for the same reason. Explain even that the baby is surrounded with like water to keep it safe and protected. Show him his belly button and explain how baby's get nutrition from their mom via the umbilical cord. That was mind blowing for my daughter when I was pregnant with her brother and she was this age, she knowing that and helped her understand things. Take him to your OB appts and let him see the ultrasound and hear the heartbeat.

Now a few years later, he may ask who planted the seed in your tummy, but one cute story at a time!!!! :) Good luck

M.,

I could only laugh when I read your query. In the long range of things, this is pretty funny - and classic three-year-old logic.

At the same age, my son asked me one fine morning if we could buy a doggie and a baby. At that, I figured it was time for sex education lesson #1. My friend was pregnant at the time, and was gracious enough to serve as an example of where babies come from. We explained to our son that babies came from Mommy without giving him a lot of detail, and that satisfied him at that time. The suggestions made by the other moms are really great, especially the ones about the seeds.

A couple of years later, we were able to get the doggie. (The baby never materialized, unfortunately). Actually, we got two dogs. And our observant then-five-year-old got a bona fide sex education lesson by watching the interaction of the male dog and female dog, and then by helping with the resulting birth and nurture of the puppies. This served as a really good foundation for sex education. I would recommend that sort of education highly.

If you lack exemplar dogs and friends, there is a wealth of information in your public library. Let some books written for his age and maturity level help you out. Screen them first, of course.

And, of course, be sure that he knows that you and your husband love each other, and that you love him and the one that is coming. (In other words, persuade him that you don't eat babies.)

Good luck!

With my last 2 I just showed them a pregnancy book with week to week pictures to show them what the baby looks like, and how they were growing. And just answer any and all questions no matter how silly they were. It was a lot of fun. They still talk about it at 7, 6 and 4. Good luck, and have fun with it.