My Ten Month Old Won't Sleep Through the Night!

I love the book "No Cry Sleep Solution" by Elizabeth Pantley. It made a huge difference with my now 18 month old. Good wishes for more sleep.

I am in the exact same boat--DD#1 slept through the night at 9 months. DD#2 suprised us by sleeping through the night at 6 weeks, but then at 7 months started waking again. She is now 9 months and waking 2-3 times per night and waking her older sister along with her! My pediatrician said not to feed her at night and that if we let her cry it out that it would be resolved within a week, but what am I supposed to do with her big sister in the next room?

I completly disagree with some of the below advice. Babies should not be expected to be on "our" schedules. They are just babies. We have to understand that they are wired different then we are. It seems to me that your baby is trying to connect with you. I have three children, the youngest is a baby boy who is almost 8 months old. I have breastfed all of them. None of them slept through the night until well past one year old. I have co-slept and night-nursed all of them. Remember that she is still a baby and needs your love and attention. She is probably wanting to nurse at night as a way to bond with you and the more you cut her feedings off the more she will cry out. And, you should respond to her when she cries. Babies rely on us to take care of them and respond to their cries. That is how they communicate that they don't feel right. You might think about buying and reading these books: Nighttime Parenting--How to Get your Baby and Child to Sleep by William Sears, MD, and Sweet Dreams--A pediatrician's secrets for your child's good night's sleep by Paul M. Fleiss, MD. It sounds like you are very busy and I'm sure she is picking up on that. Try to remember that they are only infants for a short period of time and soon enough they will not want to spend as much time with us. My 7-month old still wakes at night to nurse every 3 hours or so. This is completely normal for breastfeeding babies! Babies that are formula fed have much different sleeping cycles. The books I have mentioned above fully explain how adults and babies have different sleep cycles and how they are different. I have also read well-documented articles by sleep experts about infant and adult sleep cycles. I would encourage you to research this so you understand why your baby is wanting to nurse and waking at night. Good luck!

My second child was the same way and at 10 months old, I had had enough as well. What worked for us was to use the No-Cry Sleep Solution book.(You may be able to find this book at your local library if you don't want to buy it.) Basically it gives guidelines for teaching your child to fall asleep on his or her own, and then shows you how to gradually wean them off those middle of the night weanings. I was really amazed at how well it worked-- and much better rested now too! And reading some of the other responses, I think if you read this book it will incorporate and address some of these suggestions as well (such as letting them cry, etc.) I very strongly recommend this book-- it saved my sanity.

It's really one of those things that reminds you that even though it's your 2nd child that came from the same people and you know in your heart you haven't done anything different... and you figure that since you've been through it before it should be easier... your babies are individually different. They're personalities will be different, so you may not be able to be the exact same type of parent to both of them. You have to do what you have to do to appease them.
I have three children and I thought by the time my third rolled around, I totally had it figured out. I expected this third baby to be by far the easiest... NOT SO MUCH! He was colicky and everything I didn't for the first one didn't work. And the things I did for the 2nd child didn't work for him either! Both the other babies had slept through the night by 3 months and he's not yet. How frustrating that he wasn't reacting the same as the others had. I never had to go in and stick the binky back in the mouth because my baby couldn't self soothe. But I am up about 3-4 times just doing that. I had to just try my darndest to just figure him out (still don't have that down). I am trying to remember that each child is different and you will have different relations with each one.
Now as far as some suggestions, I heard that maybe just giving her some water instead of nursing might help. Is she cutting teeth? Some Tummy Soothers might help. Maybe even just holding her instead of nursing her might help her forget she thinks she NEEDS to eat (which of course she doesn't by this age).
Really, just try to remember that this WILL pass and you'll have stories to tell her when she's older how difficult she was but how much you loved her anyway. Also, remember that things could be a lot worse!
Good luck, you're a great mommy and you're doing your best... that's all you and your baby needs!

Hey there B.,
I know exactly how you are feeling because we are going through the same thing as well. Since you are weening her from breast feeding try putting some rice cereal in her bottle to thicken it up. You will need to get a stage 3 nipple to make sure that it will get through. That's what we are doing with our 9 month old and it is working. Putting the rice in there should fill her tummy up and she should sleep better. If you don't want to put it in the bottle just try feeding her the rice cereal before bed time. Also give her baths at night. That's what we are doing too and it works. We use that calming bath soap along with the lotion and give him a massage right after. That's all I have for you. Hang in there girlie! I have been drinking Red Bull in the mornings and that gets me awake and going. I wouldn't try it while you are still breast feeding. Nothing like giving your little one more reason to not sleep, right?

Good luck!
K.

Let her cry. Listen. But let her cry.

Is your baby eating cereal? I know that really helped my kids. It is hard to let them cry, but my pediatrician said, put them in the crib say goodnight and walk away. Don't go back in there. We also had a little ritual with both of them, when I would leave the room I would turn on a little lamb that had music and I would spin the ceiling fan. I didn't want the fan on them all night but just that little movement to look at as they drifted off helped them. I hope these ideas help. Best of luck to you. Try to get someone to watch your kids soon and take a day for yourself. Sleep in, rest, get things done for you like a pedicure. Take care!

I know this isn't going to make you happy or rested but it's probably something she's going to outgrow. I have 4 kids and I nursed all of them until 11 mos and they all were different. My 15 year old, 6 year old and 7 mos old slept through the night almost immediately. My 8 year old on the other hand almost sent me to an early grave. He nursed every 1 1/2 hrs AROUND THE CLOCK for 3 mos and went to every 3 hours until 6 mos. Your little girl could be growing and need extra calories, or it could just be a pattern that she's used to. You definately need to let her cry it out sometimes just so she can learn to pacify herself. Something to try is to let her cry for 15 minutes and if she's still crying go in and assure her that you are there and you love her and she'll be okay and leave and give her another 15 minutes. This will allow her to work it out on her own. Now if she's hungry or hurt that's a different story, but if you know whe's okay, let her go.

Maybe instead of picking her up you should just pat her let her know she is ok and then go back to your room. Each time staying gone a little longer. You have to change her routine. I saw this once on the Super Nanny and it worked. They say do not pick them up. I on the other hand did pick my son up because he was only 1 1/2 pounds when he was born and didn't come home until he was 4 months, I didn't want to miss any chance to hold him. He took a bottle until he was a yr. old. He's just a little spoiled.{;

Honestly, you need to get used to being a little tired. It comes with parenting. I've managed on 3-5 hours sleep for over 20 years and I'm fine. Sometimes I catch up for a day or two on 6 or 7 hours. But I've seen times I got only 2!

These kids need us. They didn't ask to be born! They want some love and affection in the night. So you don't have tons of choices. You can listen to them cry, get up and sit with them or bring them to bed with you. Yeah, you can also try and skip naps during the day and feed solids later before bed and maniuplate their schedules in a myriad of ways. But most of the time they just want you and nothing you do will change that. You know I had one daughter out of 4 that slept through the night at 2 months. The others always got up more. I enjoyed my time with them. Frankly, I don't get it.

All you have to do is read this site everyday and you'll see that this question is asked maybe a hundred times per year in various ways.

I promise you that in a few years you will miss this stage.

Suzi

put her on a bottle at night as some kids take a bottle til 18 months old.give it to her when she wakes up and go back to bed or put it in her babybed for when she wakes up.A.

Check out the book "On Becoming Baby Wise." Even though they recommend you start this method when they're really little, I tried this with my son when he was a bit older and it worked for me. Within about a week, he was sleeping through the night. It is about regulating their metabolism by feeding them at certain times. It really works.

Try giving her infant rice cereal before you nurse of give it to her in a bottle. She just may not be getting full enough to keep her through the night & NO two kid's are the same. After she's been fed give her a warm bath & rub her down (like a massage) & try getting some of that bedtime bath. She should sleep through the night. I hope this helps, good luck to you, get some rest:-) & God Bless!

You actually don't have anything to worry about. Your daughter not even a year and you shouldn't expect her to sleep through the night. Dr. Sears says a baby waking up at night is actually a good thing because it shows that there brain in developing normally. I understand that you are tried but your baby is just developing and that is what you want? right?
If you are tried try putting the baby in your bed. When she awakes you will be right their to nurse and it won't wake your oldest. I know you want to wean but rethink that plan because extended nursing is wonderful for you and your daughter. Here is a good article.
http://www.mothering.com/articles/new_baby/breastfeeding/...
This is just my advice and you don't have to take it but I hope you consider it. If you do wean, here is book that works good to get your baby to sleep through the night without making her cry. Good night, Sleep Tight.

A.

Hi, B., congrats on breastfeeding this 10 months, please know that this is a great health choice for your daughter! Sleeping through the night at 8 months is not always the norm and often 10 months is not either. You write that your baby girl "expects" you to run to her when she cries, that is probably not a conscious choice that a 10 month old can make. All she knows is that she needs something, and the person she TRUSTS and loves can help. Babies under a year don't make decisions to make our lives miserable, Let me ask you a few questions about your routine-you sound incredibly busy with a small child, baby, working full-time AND getting a new business off the ground, I'm already stressed! When you get up to nurse your little girl, does she feed and go right back to sleep, esp if you let her nurse til she's "done," or does she want to play? If she nurses and goes back to sleep, she's probably truly hungry, if wants to socialize, probably not. A lot of babies this age are so busy during the waking hours learning new motor skills, they don't eat as much as they should, they are busy. In busy families, there is sometimes so much to do in the evening, the nursing baby gets the short end of the stick. I would take a close look at my evenings, maybe bfeed a little more often, try to spend more family time and less chore time with my family, see if that helps. You may already be doing that. One of mine was a lot like that and no matter what I did, she still needed to eat at night, she was always so busy during the day. I had to have a talk with myself and just decide to get up, and not spend so much mental energy worrying about me. It made a huge difference in my outlook. ( up at 5:30 am, 12 hr shifts), but honestly you can spend so much time worrying about something, it will literally exhaust you, you may need to just let it go. A very good article about helping children sleep is on www.drjaygordon.com. Click on topics A-Z and scroll down to the "S's" The name of the article is Changing the Sleep Patterns in the Family Bed." I know you don't have a "family" bed, but this is a great way to change the patterns of that baby who wants to get up and play! Good luck and I hope you all sleep tight soon.

I am also a mother of two, but mine are much older. I have never nursed before.

I know with my daughter, I always made sure that her last feeding of the night I always gave her cereal along with a bottle. She never woke up, but we were very lucky. The only time I ever had any trouble with her sleeping through the night was due to her ears.

Just remember you are the parent and you have to take control of the situation. You need to get her on schedule with yours. I have always had my children on a schedule, started from the time I brought them home. I am also a working mom and I sure do need my rest. I hope this helps. I know it is easier said than done. Good Luck and Best Wishes.

I can understand needing more sleep, I am still nursing my eleven month old and she wakes up 3 to 4 times a night to nurse. What usually helps me is to play some music for her to sleep to and when she does wake up she goes back to sleep so much faster as long as the music is still playing. When I don't play the music she tends to take longer to go back to sleep. Also remember, babies need a certain amount of mommy time, if they don't get it during the day , the will try to get it during the night. Maybe she just needs alittle extra snuggle time from you right now, so this too will pass:)

B.,
Oh....you poor, poor thing.....You really must be tired. When my girls were little I had to wean them off of me and on to a bottle because I had bursitis in my hip and in order for me to get cortisone shots I had to wean my twins. What I found works best is to give them their biggest feeding or meal right before bed and supplement this with some cearl or something. Then when you little critter wakes up in the middle of the night, give her water. She will wet the bed, but at some point she will quit waking up as long as she gets pretty full an hour or so before bed. I know that is kind of trading one habit for another, but you can use a sippy cup either way, she will not be getting a small meal at each setting and it will work, it may take a week or so... Expect wet diapers at first, but she will quit waking up for water, its just not filling enough... My mom always said, a full belly and bath and to sleep you will go.... Hope this works!
ahahah sleep people actually take this for granted........J.

Hi B.! I know how exhausted you are. You have a lot on your plate. My son did this 'till he was about 13 months and I finally said "enough, I'm too tired! we have to night wean!" I realized that part of the reason he was waking was to spend time with me (or dad) that he didn't have during the day because we were soooo busy. Also, I realized I had to do something about it because I was slowly deminishing from sleep deprivation. I know reading a book sounds like the last thing you want to do, but I was very surprised with the suggestions in "The No-Cry Sleep Solution" by Elizabeth Plantley. I didn't read it cover to cover, but skimmed the parts that fit for me and my son (nursing, crib-sleeper, high needs baby) It gives lots of good suggestions for ALL kinds of sleep situations. Also, it explains why babies wake and sleep patterns change and the developmental reasons for it.
I hope this helps. Good luck,
K.

at 10 mts she is too young to cry herself to sleep. Is she eating solids? At about 6 mts you introduce solids, you mention nursing but at this age solids are needed. Perhaps she wakes up because she is hungry. Try some cereal at night before bath time, then a bottle before bed. Also studies show a child who's needs are attended to before a full blown crying spell are less likely to cry as they get older. I know its hard I have a 3 mt old girl, full time job, and a 7 and 4 yr old. I understand exhaustion. We will be exhausted until the day we die. So might as well cater to our childrens needs. Our day of rest will come. This is the life we chose, good luck.

If you haven't read 'The No-Cry Sleep Solution' by Elizabeth Pantley, I recommend it. It covers what are normal sleep patterns for babies, how to extend sleeping patterns, don't skip naps, how to move babies from one sleeping area to another. Most of these techniques you can pattern to what works for you and your family, and usually within 3 weeks you have a changed baby. I started reading the book to change where my baby sleeps. I had no problem with him sleeping, but I did learn that he would even sleep longer than the 8-9 hours a night I already was getting, and he is 5 months. Most babies should get about 10-12 hours a night. I was worried with earlier bedtime, he would wake at 4-5 in the morning, but he kept his wake time of 7-8 am, and both his naps. It is really informative and is flexible to what you need in your family, plus there is very little crying involved, if that is something you want to address as well.