Need Advice on 1-Year Old Who Wakes up Really Early

He may be overtired, and might need an extra early bedtime for a while. How's he napping at daycare? I recommend "Healthy sleep habits, happy child" by Dr. Weisbluth.

L., I'm a daycare provider, so I see lots of 1 year olds. My question is why does he "have" to go from 2 naps to 1. I have little ones who take 2 naps until they are 18 months old, I leave it up to them. I'm just thinking that if that is what has changed in the schedule, that is what is causing the problem.

M.

Tell your daycare that they need to get him on a regular nap schedule. I would think he would still need 2 naps a day. My son is only 10 months so I am just going off my friends children who at 1 are still napping twice a day. I think that kids sleep better at night when they have had plenty of rest during the day.

I have found with my two kids that if they were well-rested during the day they slept better at night. Your little guy needs between 12 and 14 hours a night of sleep just to process all the learning he did and to get ready for the next day. Why did the daycare switch his nap schedule? Most kids take two naps a day until they are a year and a half or so. If the daycare can't accomodate that I would wonder why not. They need to do what is best for him and cutting back his sleep is not good for him. It sounds to me that he is trying to readjust his day to accomodate two naps. Soon, you will be putting him to bed at 6:00 every night so he can get up at five and take a nap at 7:00 or 8:00 just to get that morning nap in. I would talk to your daycare about his naps and how important they are for him. (and you - everyone needs their rest!). Let us know what happens.

My first thought is that he is not getting enough sleep. Like another mom said, it sounds backwards, but he needs to go to bed earlier. He probably was not ready to cut down to one nap. I know most toddler rooms at daycare have just one nap, but they are supposed to adapt to each child's needs (I know this because I used to work in day care). They should be giving him two naps if he needs them.

But, if he is going to continue to take only one nap, he needs to be going to bed way earlier--before he falls asleep in your arms. When kids (and adults) are over tired, their body starts producing adrenaline that keeps them awake and stimulated. This is probably causing him to wake more frequently during the night and earlier in the morning. A well rested child usually sleeps longer than one who lacks sleep.

In addition, it can take up to about 6 weeks at child care for a child to fully adjust. Talk to his teachers often to get an idea of his adjustment, ask how they deal with toddlers trying to adjust, and visit in the classroom when you can to get an idea of how things are run by the teachers. Make sure his teachers are willing to fulfill your requests and are comforting him at school when he is upset. Many teachers believe that holding and comforting a new child will cause them to become attached to you. However, comforting them will help them become calm sooner, and then they usually tend to become more comfortable and play on their own sooner than if they were left to adjust on their own. When they are held and comforted, it helps them feel safe enough to go play and explore the room.

Lots of crying for toddlers adjusting to a new center is very common, but if you don't feel his teachers are handling it the way you want them too, have a serious conversation with them, and maybe their director.

Also, when you drop him off, don't linger and feel sorry for leaving him. He picks up on your emotions and if you act hesitant to leave him there, he will feel uneasy as well. be confident and positive, give hugs and kisses, and say good bye. Never leave without saying good bye. Some parents even have a routine at drop off--like put his things away, say hi to the other children, give hugs, then say bye and leave. If you want to stay and play with the other kids and visit with the teachers, it's best to do it at pick up time.

I really think what will help him the most is an earlier bed time or two naps (or maybe both).

Best wishes!

I would talk to your day care provider about adding an additional nap in during the day for your son. My son went through the same issues when we tried cutting him down to 2 naps a day nad it was just too tough for him. Sometimes he still takes 3 naps a day depending on how hard he played, but always gets at least 2 naps. Either an short 30-45 mins am nap or a 30-45 min pm nap and usually a good solid 2 hour nap at daycare.And he never wakes before 7am... it's usually closer to 8, and that is with an 8:30 bedtime. I'm sure if he had another nap he would probably sleep better (sounds off, but it's true).

Throw some toys in the bed with him. We did this with my youngest and we were able to sleep a little longer ourselves. Hopefully he'll play for a while until you are ready to get him up. Good luck and God Bless.

Him waking up that early may be his way of getting a second nap, sicne he doesn't get two at daycare. Is there a reason why the daycare doesn't give two naps? Each daycare my oldest went to he had two naps, until he was in preschool. A year old is still too young to only go to one nap. I would talk to the daycare and ask if they could let your son have two naps.

Our daughter also became an early riser. She is great at taking one nap a day NOW, but wasn't great in the transition from 2-a-day to 1. She needed more rest than what she was getting at daycare. Our previous daycare provider believed if the older kids laid down once a day, then she did too. Our old provider was disappointed that our daughter was a having a rough time making the transition. She would fall asleep in the middle of playing - she needed a second nap but that didn't conform with the daycare schedule. Her body told her she needed more sleep and she took it where she could get it. It was a very rough time.

I would say he might need that second nap too - at least for a little while longer. I wish I would have thought of it for our daughter before she had to go through some rough sleeping patterns.

I think someone else said it, but if he hears something he doesn't want to miss out on it's hard to resist.

I would be concerned about him having trouble adjusting to the new daycare, but five is also about the time that it is starting to get light outside. My daughter (2 and a half years) has been getting up very early lately, too, even though nothing has really changed for her. I would try to make sure that he naps well during the day and as many times as he needs to and trust that when the nights start getting longer he will sleep in more. That's what I'm doing with my daughter and having just accepted it makes me feel much less stressed about it.

It will take a little bit of time for him to adjust to the day care schedule and the new nap schedule, but I think he will work it out. I would continue to put him down when you want him to go to bed at night. Even if he lays there a while, he will learn to fall asleep. Try starting a routine at night by putting him in bed, reading him a book or two, and leave. That way he is not falling asleep with you holding him. I think he will get into a normal routine in a week or two. I would try to keep pushing the limit on picking him up at 5 AM. If he gets used to you going right in there, it will continue. Wait 5 minutes, then 10, then 15... and see if he will fall back asleep. Good Luck!

Hey L.-
I have a 14-month old son...he's had sleeping issues as well...when we moved into our new house he would wake up numerous times throughout the night...I would give him a bottle and he would go right back to sleep though. He may have been adjusting to the new surroundings...he also went through a stage where he was waking up early as well...it just kind of corrected itself...now I have the pleasure of sleeping until 6:30 or 7! :)

You can't force this. Just let him wake up and nap when he wants. He knows his body. He might be hungry. You could give him a "bed snack" be fore bed. This might help some, otherwise just give him time to adjust to the new schedule.

I agree with the previous response, they sleep better when they've had good rest during the day. My advice is, when he is up, standing in his crib, go in there and tell him "It's still "night night time", not time to get up yet" and lay him back down and tuck him back in and leave the room. It's usually still dark at 5am, so you could even show him out the window that it's still dark. Sometimes though, they are just so curious they can't wait to start their day. You'll have to let him know that play time doesn't start till the sun comes up!! LOL If he doesn't want to go back to sleep, let him play in his crib until you're ready to get up. No need to rush to him every waking moment! As long as he can't climb out and is in no danger, why not get some more ZZZ's yourself, even if he's done sleeping?

But, him not getting his usual two naps is probably causing this. Maybe he can take a short 1/2 hour catnap after daycare and stay up till 9 pm? This has seemed to work for my kids. If they are exhausted, I let them sleep, even if it's 6 pm. But only for 15-20 minutes, so it doesn't ruin their night time sleep. Good luck!

~ SAHM of 8 yr old boy and 4 yr old girl

Hi L.,

A friend of mine suggested that I read "Healthy Sleep Habits, Healthy Child", by Marc Weissbluth. I'm not finished with it yet, but it makes sooo much sense. It will be a lot of work too, but in the end it is worth it. My friend said she had absolute success with it. I don't have children yet, but we are adopting soon, so I decided to get a head start! Good Luck!

Oh my gosh L.!!! My boy does this too! I think they just get really excited about the thought of getting to go to this place where there are other little ones and they get to play all day. We started putting him down later. Plus since it is summer and it stays lighter longer we have been letting him run around outside like a maniac to the point that he is so tired that he can't hardly walk straight. Now in the mornings we usually have to wake him up. Every now and then he will get up at the butt-crack of dawn but that is few and far between. Good luck!

-K.

L.,

I would put your son to bed earlier at like 7:00 or even 6:30. It sounds crazy but he is probably over tired. He should be getting at least two naps a day. My pediatrician told me that "sleep promotes sleep" and I totally believe it! I would try to put him to bed at 7:00 and see if that works! Read "Healthy Sleep Habits, Healthy Child", by Marc Weissbluth it totally makes sense! I have used his methods from day one and my son is a great sleeper!

My youngest, who is 1. only takes one nap. If his room has windows,make sure you have some pretty heavy curtains that will keep it darker longer. My boys will wake up at the first sign of light. If he still takes a sippy cup, you may give him a little milk or even water. I can sometimes get my little one back to sleep if I fix him a cup then go in tell him it is still night night time give him a kiss and then lay him down and give him his cup. Most of the time he will drink it, get comfy and go to sleep.

I suggest paying more attention to why he is crying so much at daycare after several weeks. My son did the same thing
when he switched teachers from one year to the next in
daycare. I thought it was "just the change". But the
environment was completely different, more kids to
teacher ratio, etc. I changed schools and within
THE DAY, he was back to the boy who use to love going
to school. I don't want to dramatize it, but look into
how much your son is crying every day and what the
daycare is doing to help him. Have they asked you
questions about how to soothe him? Do they seem to care?
Good luck! M.

We have had the same issue with our 1 year old. I also found that putting him to bed any later actually made him wake up earlier and more often through the night. What I have read and heard multiple places is to try putting them to bed a half hour earlier. It sounds strange, but sometimes it actually works.
Another thing to think about is to start teaching him numbers and put a digital clock in his room where he can see it, teaching him that the clock has to say six or seven before he can call out for mommy. This may take a while to sink in, but now would be a time to start training him. My niece is 2 and sleeps in a big bed and has for some time now followed this rule--she just plays quietly in her room until the clock says 7.

It's not always the case that the daycare can do anything to manipulate what's going on at home. I know because I've tried with so many kids and parents through the years to help. As an example, where's the worst case scenario that I've had to cope with. One little girl would come in so tired that she would need to nap right after being dropped off. Then she would wake up and play and eat and go right back down when everyone else did. But she wouldn't sleep long before she would be up again and crying loudly because it wasn't time to run around yet.

We tried everything to get her on some schedule her parents and we too could live with. Many of our conversations in the morning and evening with both parents centered around trying to figure out how we could make things easier at home for them. They wanted her to go to bed at a certain time and didn't like it if she was tired before that or awake after their self appointed bedtime.

No matter what either of us did here or at home, the fact was she slept when she wanted to and pretty much always slept at least 3 hours per day at our house in 1-3 separate sleep times. It's just that she NEVER really slept the same schedule as the other kids and her schedule changed so often that we couldn't really get the other kids to follow her lead either. Her moods and her sleeping schedule kept the other kids in a constant state of change and frustration the whole time she was with us. It wasn't just sleeping but eating too. We constantly manipulated our snack and lunch times to try and figure out what she needed. She woke up more and more at home making her more and more cranky and tired during the day. It became kind of funny because she constantly would fall asleep in the middle of activities at daycare. If we let her sleep and did nothing different with the other kids then she would be insanely angry when she would wake up during their nap time and we wouldn't let her run around and wake the others. She would scream loud enough to wake them anyway on days we couldn't find a way to pacify and occupy her quietly.

Ultimately in the end the parents were convinced that somehow she was having nightmares at night that kept her awake and that it had to be something going on at daycare. It was kind of hard to take after we spent 2 years putting this child's needs first at all times and running our whole daycare in a way to try and appease her parents.

Now that she is no longer with us the other kids sleep at exactly the same time everyday and it's so peaceful here!

I'm not exactly sure why some kids go through this waking up at night. But I just hope that when parents go through this they don't jump to conclusions and insist that their provider change everything they are doing for everyone else making it equally difficult during the day and to no real advantage for anyone. I do believe daycare providers should do anything they can to try and help. BUT, don't forget they have other little ones in care and that what is sometimes asked of them simply doesn't work.

This really is a constant issue. I've had parents that wanted their kids to stay awake during the day and never nap when they were seriously tired. They would actually want us to stand them up repeatedly and wash them down with cold water to keep them awake. I've had other parents that want the nap time done and over by 2pm and others that didn't want them to go down until after that and then some that wanted a nap time to be at least 2 hours total and others that wanted us to limit nap time to 45 minutes to an hour and fully expected us to wake them up when the time is up.

I know the origional poster did not say this was the providers fault in any way.

The best thing you can do is just allow your child to play in bed in the morning. I assume he is still in a crib. Put a couple of very safe toys in bed, allow some music in the room and don't go in. My kids ALWAYS got up at 5 or 6 am and played in bed until we felt like getting our day started.

Suzi

I know it sounds backwards, but he is probably going to bed too late. When they get over tired they have more trouble sleeping and they will not sleep as long. My PAT person told me they've done studies and found that kids this age are usually ready for bed by 6-6:30. I would suggest you try putting him to bed earlier, and he will probably start to sleep later. Good luck!

i know each kid is different, but my son was in an in-home daycare from about 4 months. when she switched him to one nap a day, it took him awhile to really get in that groove. don't be afraid to let him take two naps on the weekends, if that's what he needs. he may not be ready to just have one. your daycare provider should be willing to let him have two, if he's still needing that. have you talked to them about it?also, you could try planning a couple nights of events to try to get him to stay up later. just a thought. anything from watching an extra episode of his favorite show (if that would keep him awake, which it sounds like it wouldn't) to going to the mall or playing at a park. something that you know he enjoys, so he'll be interested.

also, does he cry and get upset when he wakes up at 5? my son, i thought, was sleeping 12-14 hours a night, but we got a nursery camera and i found that he was awake a LOT longer than i thought, before he went to sleep, and in the mornings when i thought he was sleeping in. as long as he's happy i would leave him in there until it's "time" to get up (or closer to it at least!) he's safe, and it will help reinforce your routine.

just my thoughts...good luck!