Need Dinner/lunch Solutions- Picky Eaters, Vegetarian, All in One House

The boy is 17...old enough to learn how to cook and start preparing his own special meals.
Husband is too....I know he works and doesn't feel like cooking when he gets home. Perhaps you two can compromise and he cook at least one night a week. You need a night off now and then too, ya know.
The 13 year old is old enough to start learning how to cook so now is the time to start teaching her how to prepare meals.
Once this happens, this should reduce the amount of stress on you to make a million meals everyday.

Try Deborah Madison's vegetarian cookbook. The recipes are tasty - many easy and fast - and I have been able to use them with my picky eaters.
http://www.amazon.com/Vegetarian-Cooking-Everyone-Deborah...

Try not to stress about it. I made the choice to become Vegan at the age of 38 and it was the best thing I ever did for my health. Whole Foods is my fav place, because of the variety of foods they offer, (tamales, sunshine burgers, amy's). If he chooses to remain vegetarian he will expand his choice of foods. I think it is best that he learn to buy & prepare his own foods. I think it is great that you are trying to prepare foods for him. It is so difficult for me and I am an adult. I am the only one in my family that is a veggie. My husband has learned to prepare his own meat dishes, since I am totally grossed out by meat now. Sometimes he prepares the whole meal making salad, rice & veggies for me. Sounds like your husband won't be doing this, but I think it will make a difference for your son. There are now plenty of vegetarian books out there (Being vegetarian, Vegetarian for dummies, Conscious eating). If your son is truly set on being vegetarian, it is best to study up on it, many vegetarian make the mistake of eating too much dairy (www.notmilk.com). VEGlife, DEVA, & Solgar make great supplements. I hope this helps.
www.mybiopro.com/claudia13 (learn how to protect your family from cell phone and EMF radiation)

I am vegan and these are two dinners that I make a lot at my house...my son is 7 and eats them up.
Last night we had veggie/bean burritos:
Cut into small pieces (so later somewhat unidentifiable): eggplant (I didnt' even like eggplant before this dish), yellow squash, zucchini, portabella mushrooms. Toss with Newman's Sundried Tomatoe dressing. Spread on cookie sheet and roast for 20 min at 400F. Heat a can of black beans. I add lime juice and cilatro. Spread veggies, beans, and if desired, cheese and quacamole. Add salsa also if you like but we don't becuase it tastes great without. I served this with blueberries and strawberries.

Second meal is Pad Thai. Asian noodles dishes are soooooo easy and they taste great. THey are not pasta either! All you do with rice noodles is soak them and then throw them in a pan to heat with any other ingredients. Look online at chooseveg.com for some good recipes...try the sheperd's pie!

Oh, also, I just found a good pork like substitute in the frozen section called Vegan Citrus Sparerib Cutlets in Plum Vinegar Sauce. They are by Vegetarian Plus. I heated these and just put it over brown rice....sooooo good! I'm sure I found this at Whole Foods

BTW, I don't envy you...I only have one child who is not vegetarian but luckily he loves all food!! Good luck!!

You really do have your hands full. If it were me, I would sit down with each person individually and ask them to give me (while we sit there together) a menu of the meals that they would enjoy for each and every day of the week. Tell teenage son that if he is going to be vegetarian, he has to eat well-balanced meals and be responsible for understanding what that is. (I feel your pain on this one. My daughter did the same thing at that age and remained a vegetarian until she got married at age 30!) Tell hubby that you want to help him lose the 20 pounds and you need his input. Then go through everyone's ideal menus to see where they mesh and where they don't. I would imagine that the food for each meal will have to be prepared in a slightly different way. Cook the pasta without meat and have it in a bowl by itself. Make a meat sauce and have it in a separate bowl, etc. Beans are good for everyone. Good luck.

Bless you heart! It sounds like your doing the best you can. Of course, it all starts with the shopping. Like the other mother said, get your 17 yr old a vegan cook book and include him in the shopping. I don't have any tips for vegetarians. But, it is pretty obvious that you'll probably never make everybody happy at the dinner table. I would grill or bake a variety of meat on Sunday at least 2-3 days worth. Grilling veggies is great too. Then Mon, Tues and Weds you can pull out one of your meat options to warm up. Great thing about left over grilled meat or grilled veggies is you can throw it on pasta or in a tortilla for variation for hubby and the girls! At that point focus on a theme for the night a variety of beans and veggies and/or pasta rice. Yes, get the kids involved on the list the shopping and cooking! Perhaps, dad will be more appreciative if he see that the dinner efforts came from the kids as well. This may assist you on the timing issues as well. Good Luck Momma!!

Hi E.-

I'm sure this is not the solution you are looking for, but this is what I would do. You make dinner for yourself and your daughters (it sounds like they'll eat what you eat). Make sure you have plenty of the canned or frozen foods that your husband likes and let him choose whichever one he wants and throw it in the microwave. Your son is old enough to be cooking for himself. He needs to learn how to do this sooner or later if he every plans on going to college or living on his own anyway. Make sure you are buying the foods he needs when you do the shopping (have him make a list for you each week) and then he can prepare his meals including his sack lunch for school.

Good luck,
K.

I hate to be brass, but when I was 17 I was making my own lunch for school!! Also it sounds to me like you are making a lot of concessions and have more work put on you. When my mom cooked, we either ate it or were on our own. What about the girls?? What are you going to do when they start special ordering their meals too? Maybe y'all should have a family meeting and decide the menu. Or maybe even assign nights of the week where one person gets to decide what is for dinner( and they get to help prepare it). Sorry if this is too harsh. Good luck girl!

OK. I hope this doesn't sound mean, but you are a mother, NOT a short order cook. My child is a very picky eater. My husband is an ok eater & I'll eat just about anything. What I cook is dinner. If they don't want it, they don't have to eat it, but that's it... that's all that's offered. For your vegetarian, he's old enough to make a trip to the store with you & pick out some items for lunch. His personal decision shouldn't be your burden alone. He's old enough to make his own lunch. You buy the food and he can prepare it. That way you're respecting his choices & he can respect the fact that you have 4 other people in the family to feed who aren't vegetarians. If you want, have him look up some recipes online that he might like. Everyone else needs to get over it & eat what you make for them or learn how to cook their own meals.

i have lots of suggestions and recipes. my husband is a vegetarian and the rest of us are not. email me and i will send you lots of tips and easy recipes and product ____@____.com

I don't care if I sound mean, exactly when did you have "Denny's" tattooed on your forehead? Post the menu every Sunday evening. Tell them there are no substitutions! Make a meat, a starch.carb and some veggies. If no one wants what is on the menu then they can figure out their own meal for that evening. Stop the Insanity!!!!! Just because you are a stay at home Mom does not mean you are their slave! Good grief, I am sorry and I hope you are able to fix it.

Hi E.,

I agree with the other moms about your son making his own lunches. As for dinners perhaps it should be a family affair. Have your son and daughters start helping to make dinners or have your son make dinner by himself for the family one night out of the week. Then he can learn what it is like to cook for a group of people that don't all want or like the same thing. As for the husband, if he is serious about losing wait, pin him down on what type of diet he intends to use, i.e. Weight Watchers, The Zone, South Beach, etc. Make sure he researches it and finds one that he can live with then buy a cookbook that has meals from that diet. Then the whole family can be involved and help support your husband on that diet. If you can get your husband to do it have him make a dinner on a weekend night.
Stick to your guns though because this won't be an easy battle especially since your son has grown up watching your husband be so picky about what he eats.

Hope it all works out for you,
H.

Honey, I just don't KNOW what to suggest! My DH eats just about anything I put in front of him. Thank goodness I'm a good cook.

As for lunch suggestions for the 17 year old veggie, here's a recipe for a sandwich spread that I use. My 3.5 year old and 20 month old LOVE it. There is no onion texture, just the flavor of roasted onion. Delish...

1 red bell pepper, sliced into rings
1 medium onion, sliced into rings
4 cloves garlic, crushed
1 small zucchini, sliced
1 tablespoon olive oil
8 ounces cream cheese, softened
Kosher salt
Freshly ground black pepper
Challah, foccacia, or pita bread, for serving
Preheat oven to 400 degrees F.
Place the bell pepper, onion, garlic, zucchini, and olive oil in a medium mixing bowl and toss until the vegetables are coated. Spread the vegetables evenly on sheet pan lined with foil and place to the oven. Roast, tossing occasionally, until they are soft and are beginning to turn brown around the edges, approximately 45 minutes. Remove from the oven and cool completely.
Place the vegetables in the bowl of a food processor along with the cream cheese and process until well combined and spreadable; do not process until completely smooth.
Taste and season with salt and pepper, if desired. Spread on soft bread, such as challah, foccacia, or pita bread. Store in the refrigerator in an airtight container for up to 1 week.

This probably sounds harsh too so I'm sorry. Get them to all write down their favorite foods. Make a menu. Then make them order it every night before bedtime and you can make each of them their food...just like a restaurant. Then charge them for it....if they want to treat u like a short-order cook reap the rewards. Just like at the restaurant....they only get one helping. Maybe you could make a bunch freeze it & then have it on hand when its ordered.

Mom I post easy recipe ideas using items that are on sale at HEB, many of them can be altered for vegetarians, sub. chicken for veggies etc.

http://sanantoniomoms.blogspot.com/

My fav recipe is making taco filling but using cooked lentils rather than ground beef. I follow the directions with the taco seasoning but substitute cooked lentils for meat,and my toddler love them too.

I like many of the other ideas. I know one thing we did a couple years ago when I was unhappy about chores and helping out, was that I called a family mtg.

Everyone had to be there---everyone had a chance to speak and brainstorm ideas. I had a plan but figured it would be harder to "sell" my plan, and easier for everyone to buy into it if the husband and the kids contributed to it.

Meeting worked well! Keep emotions low key, no attacking or criticizing...etc... After wards, we had a plan everyone could agree on...wasn't one that Mom told us we had to do. And my family said after wards they never knew I felt that way, until the meeting. So if something is bothering you, make sure you tell them.

Then let the 17 year old make his own lunch and dinner! My brother and I made our own as soon as we were old enough. If he doesn't want to eat what you make, then he can make do with his own. Either he eats what you make or he makes a peanut butter sandwich! And stick to your 'guns' on this.

As for your husband, sit down with him and find out what he would like to eat, try, and would be willing to try. Give him some menu options rotating the food ideas. Plan it out so everyone is happy!

I ditto Karen.

First of all a 17 year old should be making his own lunches. He will be in college soon and will need to know what he can prepare on his own. I even have a friend in the same position and she gives her son money to go out and purchase his own groceries and prepare his own meals, since he is so particular. This way when he left for college he already knew how to cook for him self.
I am sure dinner would be hard to have everybody in the kitchen at once, so maybe take turns cooking throughout the week,. Make a menu and schedule.

For your husband continue to let him eat what he always eat, just include a variety of new fresh veggie dishes he does not have to eat it. If you are making fajitas, also make grilled veggies for your son and make sure there is fresh guacamole. If you are making a lasagna, make your son some eggplant (grilled) and pour Italian sauce on top. Just adjust what you normally cook. Your son can just eat the side dishes or he can make something else if he wants.

There are also certain things you can always have prepared and in the fridge. And things to keep in the pantry.
Cooked brown rice, Beans (black, pinto, garbanzo, Italian) Whole wheat bread, whole wheat tortillas, whole wheat pita bread Oatmeal, granola, sweet potatoes (baked or mashed or as oven fries)Soy cheese, edemame, garden burger patties, and lots of raw veggies. Soy sauce, chili sauce, sesame oil, rice vinegar, veggie boullion, Miso salad dressing, hot sauce, peanut butter, almond butter. Lots of fresh fruit.

Things to cook.
You and your son should learn to make;
Grilled marinated tofu
Homemade granola
Garden burger patties
Homemade egg rolls. Then freeze them.
Pot stickers
Eggplant lasagna
Bean burritos
Crock pot beans
“Rice maker” brown rice
Grilled Veggie fajitas
Stuffed cabbage leaves
Veggie chili
Tabooley
Hummis
Roasted cauliflower
Chille Reyenos stuffed with acorn squash

Your husband sounds worse than my children! (Sorry! but what a stressful thing for the "cook" to deal with! Does he not realize how incredibly out of line he is?) I'd have a family meeting and let everyone choose a menu item for one night of the week and out of respect for each other and the cook, eat it and be happy to have good food and a family to share it with. Don't force meat on a vegetarian, etc.., so some variations are always necessary, but for the most part you all need to call a big truce on mealtime pickiness before mom stages a walk-out! ;)
I'm rootin' for ya! I cook from recipes my husband clips from the newspaper, but my mom (who hates to cook, and my dad is a no onion guy, too) loves Rachel Ray recipes, so maybe try her out.

E.,

Bless your heart. You have become a short-order cook. I like your idea of hiring a chef and you stepping out while everyone orders their meal! Is it affordable? LOL I feel your pain. I have a quick & easy recipe for lunch that can be made vegan or not:

1 can Grands original biscuits (8 large)
1 pkg (3 pkg/box) Boboli original pizza sauce
Shredded mozzeralla cheese (as much as you like)
assorted veggies (sliced)
Wilson's pepperoni slices (for the meat eaters)

Roll out the biscuits to 1/4" thick; spread with pizza sauce; top with sliced veggies, then cheese; top with meat if desired. Bake as directed on the biscuit can(I preheat my baking stone while I'm assembling the pizza's). You can do ANYTHING with this recipe. Each person can have his "own pizza". Have fun with it. My kids and husband love them.

They also freeze well. After baking, cool them and place flat in a freezer bag in single layers (4 in a gallon size bag) For a quick lunch, take one out, heat in microwave for 30-45 seconmds and then into the toaster oven to "crisp" it back up. YUMMY and FAST! Label each person's bag to make it easier to find.

HTH

PS...this "vegan thing" is a fad amongst your sons age group and usually remedies itself over time...you know...when they begin starving!!! LOL

You call yourself a "SAHM". I call you a rug or mat or carpet or floor....anything that gets walked all over and your have allowed your family, beginning with your "mostly prince of a guy". You are the female head of the household and one of your duties as such is to plan, prepare and serve healthful meals to your family. There's nothing wrong with making one or two "special" dishes per night so that during the week everyone is catered to, but that's the problem, everyone is catered to except the one doing the catering. Lay down the law. Eat it or go hungry, and if it isn't eaten the first night, serve it as leftovers the next night. Eventually they'll get the message. If this fails, or if they complain too much, just quit. Let each one be responsible for making his own meal, which includes shopping for it, with the only stipulation being that everything must be on the table at the same so you can have a family sit-down meal....HOUSE RULE, EVERYBODY MUST ABIDE

Why is your son not making his own lunches at 17? Get him a couple of vegetarian cookbooks and have him feed himself. If your husband is that picky of an eater, let him do the cooking. You are trying way too hard to please too many people. The rule in my house growing up was that you eat what the cook makes or either 1) go hungry or 2) start cooking.

Ask your 17 year-old to make a list of what he would like in his lunch. Also, ask him to research some recipes for you. Whatever will be healthy for him will also be healthy for his younger siblings. A meat dish can be added for your husband and any others who want it.

Here is one dish we like as a main course. Layer peeled and sliced potatoes, carrots, onion, bell pepper, garlic in a large skillet. Add any of the following: broccoli, cauliflower, squash, cabbage, rutabaga, etc. that your family likes. Season with salt and pepper or whatever spices you desire. We usually add sliced beef sausage on top. Add 1/2 cup water, cover and steam for about 15 to 20 minutes. Don't overcook. Leftover roast or chicken would also be good to add for thos who want it. In a smaller skillet, you could make the amount your son would need and just leave off the meat. Drizzle a little olive oil over his... or not.

This layered meal is so easy to prepare and always tastes so good.

Another day, make a hearty vegetable soup. Add meat for those who want it. One pot does it all. Cooked beef or chicken can be added to the bowls as they are served.

Don't forget beets. They are good heated and buttered. Pickled beets in jars are good. Of course, fresh is always best and this vegetable is a good source of iron.

Loma Linda used to make canned soy products that could be used as a meat substitute to use in casseroles, chili, patties. Other companies make it, too, I am pretty sure. Seasonings make a difference on how good it tastes. I have seen a lot of new things advertised.

Here is a trick I learned last summer. You can steam cauliflower until nicely soft but not overcooked, mash it as smoothly as you would mashed potatoes, season as you would potatoes and serve. Most people will think it is mashed potatoes and they will instead be getting a good helping of a healthy cruciferous vegetable.

I am sure others will have many good suggestions. Check recipes, or adapt recipes from restaurants that specialize in vegetarian dishes. Be adventurous. Enjoy the wonderful family you have. Oh, and for something fun and easy, have a nacho night! Or loaded baked potatoes and a salad. Keep a bowl of fruit handy for snaking or dessert.

Oh momma your working way too hard. If you make soy tacos guess what everyone gets soy tacos. Might I mention that if you dont tell them most of the time they cant even tell. My husband made turkey tacos and I couldnt tell. These people are old enough to make there own meals...including the 11 yr old. Make one meal and the kids and husband can either eat it or go out. If they go out pack up the dinner and serve it the next night. Your husband and you need to get on the same page here. Have him cook for everyone for 3 nights just three. And see what he ends up doing. Tell him your on dinner strike. You have unwillingly( is that the word) created these little picky monsters. Now its time to straighten it out. If all else fails then I personally would cook for Dad and let the kids eat what they wanted off the plate...and no scowering the pantery after dinner. They are lucky they even get to have a family dinner. Best of luck to you.

Sounds like you need to adopt my thoughts on dinner . . . cook what you like and if they don't want it eat it then they can cook (and clean the kitchen) themselves. . .

I would make the compromise of meat and no meat variations. I also do small amounts of various veggies (I like asparagus and zuchinni, hubby likes frozen mixed veggies, and daughter likes canned corn - luckily son-in-law will eat whatever he is given) and put certain parts of the dish (example: cheese) as "on the side".

With so many different tastes and preferences, you just can't try to please everyone . . . so you might as well just make yourself happy.

Another compromise would be to allow each member one day of "what do you want" (chosen ahead of time of course). If they say "I don't know" or "I don't care" then that day reverts back to your choice. . .

eventually they will figure it out that they either eat what is given or cook and clean for themselves . . . mean, but as was said elsewhere in the responses -- you are the mom not the short order cook.