Need Help W/ 4Yo STILLLLLL Wetting at Night

I have 4-year-old twins. One usually stays dry and the other usually wets overnight and even at naptime sometimes. My husband was concerned; although, I was not too worried. My daughter was a heavy sleeper and although she didn't consistently wet the bed, she did have accidents on occasion until she was at least 7 or so. She now wakes up to go to the bathroom, but often is disoriented because she is not fully awake. We sometimes have to direct her to the bathroom. I agree with the other posts--don't worry and move her to the next size pull up or goodnight. They also make waterproof mattress pads if you want to give it a shot without. Just be prepared to do laundry in the morning. :)

T.

I wonder if she would be uncomfortable enough if she wet the bed to learn to trigger herself to wake up when she has to go to the bathroom. Pullups are just so expensive. And they are so much like diapers that they can't really tell when they have wet them. If she were to be uncomfortable a few nights in a row her body might learn to train itself to wake up. A little extra laundry to do for a time but maybe worth it. Just my thoughts!

I haven't read all the responses so some of this may be redundant but just put her in pullups. As frustrating and expensive as it is, you will be getting more sleep and doing less laundry. I have a 5 1/2 and 4 year old boys that still wet at night. The 4 year old will occassionally get up and go but not his brother. We will see on my daughter who is 2 1/2, she is potty trained but not at night yet. One of my babysitters said she was 10 before she stopped wearing pullups. You are not alone in this some day she will have a big enough bladder to hold it or wake herself up until then, sleep :O)

J.:
Your daughter should soon stop wetting at night. My granddaughter just turned 4 back in June and my daughter said that she was finally potty trained when she was 46 months old. Don't panic for a while yet.
P. S

My eight year old daughter still wets at night. She sleeps like a rock also. She wears Goodnites, for older kids. I think Pampers has come out with something like the Goodnites too but, we haven't tried them yet. Our pediatrician says not to worry. My husband was a bed wetter until he was around nine so,that's probably where she got it from. You should go to Goodnites.com. They have a lot of good information and you can get coupons. Be patient and let her know it's okay and normal. Good luck.

Our 6 year old daughter also sleeps like a log, and wakes most morning with a wet pull-up. We've been told not to worry about it...that she'll grow out of it eventually. Our other daughter began to stay dry at night by 23 months, so we know they're just very different kids! Just be patient with her; she'll eventually stay dry at night :)

Hey J. I have 3 year old twins and we just got the night time thing down. Pull ups no way. This is what I did and it might help. First I stopped letting them have anything to drink 2hours prior to laying down. My kids go to sleep at 8:30 so around 6:30 they stop drinking. Second thing is to make them use the restroom 2 times prior to their set bed time. If they cant do the 2 times at least once prior to laying down. Then the night time wake up is a must because that is just you programing her to get up if you do it at the same time every night she will train herself to get up when you normally come in to get her. Most important!! take away the pull-ups. Its a safety net. they know it will be ok to wet it. At first it will be messy but she won't like the feeling. ( you won't like the cleaning either. LOL) And as for the sleeping like a log. My boy are the same way they just stay sleep and pee with their eyes closed.

kids bladders mature at different rates. She just may not be ready at night. (Sometimes this is a genetic thing.) I personally wet the bed occasionally until I was almost 7. I wish I had pullups. We just had a wet bed on ocassion. They make Underjammers for older kids and they are thin and supose to look more like underwear like pullups. IMHO,I wouldn't wake her at night to go to the bathroom.

J.,

My son also sleeps like a log (he'll sleep through severe thunderstorms) and was wetting the bed. At our annual pediatrician visits, we were told "He'll grow out of it." But last year, he turned eight and he was still wetting the bed at night. The final straw was when he was invited to a sleepover at a friend's house and had to turn down the invitation. He was crushed. He felt like something was wrong with him even though, technically, this is a MEDICAL problem.

My friend mentioned that her mom had used a bedwetting alarm with her successfully. I did some research and found a place online called The Bedwetting Store. (the link is www.bedwettingstore.com). They have sooo much information there and were very helpful. I ended up buying the Malem sound & vibration alarm. It took about 3 months, but he is now dry at night and I no longer have to buy the nighttime pullup$$. You will have to get up with her in the beginning until her body learns what the alarm means. (This was hard for me because I, too, am a deep sleeper) They will include a book with the purchase of the alarm. This was the biggest help for us. It helped to explain both the physiology and the psychology behind the bedwetting alarm training.

I wish you the best of luck.

A friend of mine mentioned on Saturday that her daughter (eight in October) is still not there yet, and that she's gotten an alarm pad for under the bed. She is getting up with her daughter when the alarm goes off to train her to get up, walk to the bathroom, and go in the toilet. Be patient and non judgemental about it. It's not something she has control over. She won't get too big for the night pants. It's a common problem.

Buy the larger sized Goodnights and be prepared to wait it out. Do you know anything about the birth parents. Everything I've read says if either of the parents were bedwetters their children are much more likely to be and should outgrow it at around the same age. My son is almost 8 and still wets the bed most nights. I was a bed wetter and recently found out my mother was too. Just try to be patient and make sure she knows it isn't her fault. Also my pediatrician said waking a child up at night doesn't help. It just creates poor sleep habits. Also DON'T use the Desmopressin nasal spray some peds recommend. The FDA has found that it causes seizures and the American Academy of Pediatricians has calles for doctors to stop using it for bedwetting.

My son (who is also adopted)just turned 5 and still wets most nights. He is also a very heavy sleeper. I have tried waking him (like you have) but found he would still wet. We have returned to using pull ups and I agree with the previous post that they are still pretty young. I have talked to the pediatrician about this as well and he said it is perfectly normal...so I wouldn't sweat it!

C.

Some people just sleep more soundly than others. My granddaughter would have accidents at night occasionally until about 11. They do slim up. They also make incontinence pants for adults so don't worry about not having something. It is a little awkward for "spend the night" but you make sure they have their supplies and know how to discreetly handle it. A zip-lock bag to put the wet panties in will work and no one know her "secret". Personally I was about 6 when I became able to awaken at night to go to the
bathroom. Do limit liquids at least 2 hours before bedtime. Don't make too big a deal about something she just can't help. Let me add that my health has always been excellent so this sound sleep must be good for something. My sister who was dry at night from about a year old has had many health problems all her life. Don't know if they are connected but maybe they are. V.

You might have to cut her drinking at night early. Stop giving her something to drink after 7pm or two hours before she goes to bed. If it is still the same or getting worst take her to a doctor, she might have a wetting problem and don't be shame it happens. Do reserch on bed wetting and see if she has the symptons.

Child Care Provider and mother of 3

My daughter will be 4 in October. She, too, won't wake at night to potty. The only way she'll stay dry at night is if I take her before I go to bed and again during the night.

My pediatrician explained that there is a biological switch that will flip when her body has matured a bit more and at that time she'll start waking to go to the potty on her own. She asked me to give her more time and said that it is common for a child not to be night-trained until the age of 5.

That being said, two of my husband's co-workers used alarms that somehow attach to the childs underwear and ring at the first sign of dampness, waking the child and training her to wake up on her own. They swear by them. In our case, though, I'm not inclined to consider any drastic measure such as that.

Good luck!!

Be patient...my 7 year old still wets every single night. It is frustrating, expecially since my other 2 kids were dry at night right after potty training. This child actually potty trained himself in one day, and the earliest of the 3, but cannot help himself at night. There is lots of advice and theories out there, talk to your pediatrician, too. What ever you decide to do, just be kind and loving. They are embarrassed and cannot help it. We are hoping to out grow it soon--good luck with your daughter.

All the 4 year olds I know and my own children still wear pull ups and wet them at night. I think 4 is way too young to expect her to not wet at night. My son quit right before his 6th birthday and that is the age my friends children quit as well. So I think it's pretty normal. They make a pull up called "Good Nites" that go up to like 70 lbs. I would not expect her to wake up at night to go for at least another year and a half. Don't expect them to be adults when they are just trying to learn how to not be a baby.

My six year old son still sleeps in the Good Nites type pullups. He doesn't have an accident everynight, but often enough that he has to wear the pullups at night. We don't make a big deal out of it at all and he always asks to get a pullup at bedtime. He gets them out of the closet and puts them on himself.

I wouldn't wake your daughter up at night, neither you nor she will get a good night's sleep this way.

I was a frequent bedwetter until I was about 9 or 10 years old. I stopped when my mother had me do perennial exercises (now known as Kegels) to strengthen my bladder muscles by continuously starting and stopping the flow when I was using the bathroom. She got this information from our pediatrician. It turned out that my bedwetting was a treatable condition that was also hereditary (both my sister and brother had the same issues). There is even a pill for some types of bedwetters now! If you are really concerned, take it up with the pediatrician. Other than that, it's not that unusual to have a 4 year old to still wet the bed at night. Good luck!

I wouldn't worry about it. She'll outgrow it. Some kids do this until they are 12yo. One of my husband's brothers (now 48yo), stopped at age 16. It happens to some. Although I've never experienced this with any of my children (yet...who knows), I've done tons of research to know that this is quite normal. Try not to fret over it and show your frustration to your child. Just lovingly accept what's going on right now.

Also, as someone else mentioned, 'Good Nights' are for this very purpose (older kids).

My nephew is now 8years old and just stopped wearing pull ups at night this summer while his 2 1/2 year old sister is already "night proof". He just slept so hard he wouldnt wake up until his bed was soaked... my sister talked to the doctor and the pediatrician said pull ups at night is ok, some kids just sleep like rocks... Good news is he HAS grown out of it... so try to be patient... by the way he was completely independent about putting them on at bed time under his PJs and taking them off in the morning when he go dressed (he would rather do that than wet the bed), my sis just had to buy them... they called them night night undies...
hope this helps!!

I have had this concern as well with my 5 1/2 year old. She is a big drinker (water that is) and even when I hold back all drinks after 6:00 p.m. she still has a wet pull up in the morning. My pediatrician assures me that when her bladder is mature enough she will do it. She was potty trained at 2 but has worn pullups forever. Her 3 year old sister will probably lose the nightime pull up first. I too get the girls up in the middle of the night....it doesn't matter.
Wishing you the best.
Blessed mother of 2 daughters adopted from China

Hello J. D, congratulations on a long relationship and two beautiful girls... Take a moment or a weekend and count to ten... you are a wonderful parent for being so patient and it will help to make your little one's secure, confident and successful women.

My advice is to stop the liquids before a certain time in the evening... depending on the bed time I suggest two hours before bed without any fluid. Just before bed, a bathroom trip would help and if you can work it out, you and hubby alternate nightly at 2am to take her to the bathroom. She will learn through actions better than anything else.

I hope that this works for you.

God Bless
N. S.

My son is 5 and he uses Goodnights for bedtime. They are right beside pullups and go up to larger sizes/weight. We tried to go without it but after a week of training and daily wetting the bed, I thought it best to let him outgrow it for now.

Hello J. D.

I feel your pain. My son was still having accidents until 11 years old. I would cut off drinks early in the evening get him up at 11pm and then in the middle of the night. He eventually grew out of it. When he was real little, like your daughter .. I was washing sheets everyday ! Invest in one of those mattress covers. They have them at Walmart.. about $5. It saves the mattress. You can also take her to the doctor. They will do an ultrasound of her bladder, to make sure everything is ok. Sometimes they prescribe medication. I work in a Urologist office, we have some patients (boys) in their teens.. some as old as 16. It will be very stressful, but she will eventually grow out of it.