Need Ideas for Any Children Volunteer Programs. Please Read!

Updated on November 16, 2007
S.P. asks from Lincoln, NE
18 answers

My children are getting more and more disrespectful, willful, and expectant everyday. They do not act this way toward other adults...but I am at my wits end. I take stuff away, but it doesn't phase them.(I have even cancelled Fourth of July celebrations) I have talked to them about how fortunate they are...but that doesn't sink in. They are very close in age and when they get to playing they can down right become destructive. OK...now onto my thought..short of taking them to a 3rd world country to volunteer...what is around here that could actuallylet them SEE that what they have isn't so bad...and that others out there need help too.

Any ideas would be great!

Thanks

S.

1 mom found this helpful

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M.B.

answers from Casper on

My kids and I volunteer and the soup kitchen, the womens safe house and the animal shelter. Every month we make a huge mess of the kitchen baking goodies for the soup kitchen and safe house. We set up booths and the stores to collect donations. They clean the animal pins and feed them. They serve dinners and we collect and wrap presents for the children that are in the safe house. At first they was kind of like "what ever". But after it sunk in why these people had to go to the soup kitch and why the women and children were in the safe house. They started thinking. I saw the change in them and it is wonderful. You could even volunteer to clean up a stretch of road. It worked for me. Hope some of it works for you.

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P.K.

answers from Boise on

Hi S.,
I have decided what I want to be and reinvented myself numerous times in life...and now I am a life coach. I would love to offer you a complementary session via the phone if you are interested just call me at ###-###-####.

P. Kerr
www.lifecoachpaula.com
Boise Idaho

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S.L.

answers from Benton Harbor on

Hi S.,

I don't think organizations are allowed to let children under the age of 14 officially volunteer (due to child labor laws). You may be able to find ways as a family, to help those less fortunate. Maybe you could check with local churches about collecting and distributing items for families in need. Local nursing homes and the Childrens' wards at hospitals often ask people to come in and read to or play games and visit with residents. Maybe getting involved to help others directly will help them realize how fortunate they are, and it's also a great way to build self esteem(it feels good to help others). I hope that I have given you a place to start, good luck!

1 mom found this helpful
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J.T.

answers from Kalamazoo on

I know that this is getting more and more frequent in children these days. I know how frusterating it can be and I never wanted my child to be stuck up so I take my child to volunteer sites everyweek. We go to the homeless shelter, we go rake leaves for the old lady next door (who my kid adores) and we make a trip to goodwill to donate our used cloths. I believe that if a unrespectful child sees how bad some people in their own community their very own neighborhood they may stop and think about how much they DO have. Hope this helped you, J.

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J.P.

answers from Salt Lake City on

I don't know of any volunteer programs but I am sure there are a lot especially with the holidays coming up. I just wanted to give you a resource that may or may not be helpful that we use at the agency that I work at. It is called Love & Logic. They have books and I think some places may even do classes. But I have seen many parents use Love & Logic and be successful when it comes to parenting kids. Hope that helps and good luck!

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J.S.

answers from Salt Lake City on

I admire a co-worker of mine, she has 3 little ones, she is very frugle and I feel teaches her children the kind of values it looks like you looking to teach your children.
She has a set amount of money for Christmas for each child, she takes the kids to the mall where they have the gift of giving tree (or something like that) and let her kids pick a child to buy a present for, the money comes out of there christmas fund, she always tells her kids they dont have to give a gift and just keep the money to be spent on them, but they always do and feel so good about them selves for it. I dont know how many kids would sacrafice a gift for them self to give instead to another child, but we might be amazed, especially when they see all the names on the tree and how many kids dont even get a christmas and for them to know they just made theier christmas dreams come true. My son is totally into that, its so important for him to give to the less fortunate. He bugs me and bugs me around christmas to go pick a name off the tree and we split the cost (he pays with his own money)

One thing we do is when ever we see a homeless person with a sign "Will work for food" or whatever, we always give them a buck or 5. I started doing this a long time ago so my son could see what selflessness looked like. The other day we were in Down town Salt lake and saw a homeless man, my son whipped out his wallet, pulled out a buck (he only had 4 dollars on him) and gave the homeless man his dollar. Some people disagree giving homeless people money because they say they buy booze with it, I tell them I do it for me, not for them. And what they do with the money is none of my business.

I'd also just like to give you a link to a website, if you've never heard of it, its a parenting site called Love and Logic, I am a facilitator and teach Love and Logic in Elementary schools to parents in the evenings. But the website has tons of great info.
http://www.loveandlogic.com
There is a link to listen to "Funny Parenting Stories"
http://www.loveandlogic.com/audioclips.html

You may find some helpful info there too.

HTH, Good luck.

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L.H.

answers from Milwaukee on

I feel your pain. This was when my mother was thankful for instilling us with a little Catholic guilt! Alas, days have changed! I am a mother of 2 boys, 19 and 13. I also have experienced the spoiled brat syndrome. I would suggest a wonderful book, Discipline with Love and Logic, by Jim Fay and Foster Kline. Its not as corny as it sounds. This was recommended to me by a coworker, Dave Funk,who also wrote the books, Teaching with Love and Logic and Love and Logic Suggestion for kids with special needs.
These books give actual role playing situations.
Remember you will most likely see the behavior you are trying to extinguish increase before it dies completely...flashbacks from Psych 101.
Good Luck and Hang in there. It gets better.

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C.M.

answers from Bismarck on

Hi S.

I am the Director in our area for the program that supports meals on wheels. It is a program that always needs volunteers to bring meals to those who are unable to cook for themselves and often cannot even leave their homes. Whenever I run meals it is an eye-opening experience. Hope this helps!

C.

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T.R.

answers from Saginaw on

I didn't read whether your children were boys or girls, but either way, SCOUTS! I am a Girl Scout Leader, and we are always looking for ways to volunteer in our town. We help out the elderly, the less fortunate, etc. I know that both Girl and Boy Scouts is all about helping the world. If your youngest is a girl, she can join Daisies in Kindergarten. If your youngest is a boy, however, he'll have to wait until he's 6 to join Cub Scouts. Scouting is an incredible way to open up the eyes of our young children to the fact that they're pretty well off after all!!

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C.A.

answers from Boise on

You can adopt a family to feed for Thanksgiving. Health and Welfare might be able to help you find a good candidate. I did this in highschool with Student Government. It was fun shopping for all the differant families. You don't have to stick to food. We added toothbrushes, laundry soap and new clothes to our shopping lists. It would be a good oppertunity for you all to spend some time as a family. Also, it sounds like your kids need a posetive way to get out some energy. It has been my experience with numerous siblings, that any attention they get (good or bad) is fine when they have so much competition. So, even when they are driving you nuts, remember to ask yourself if they are doing it to get you fired up. I always try to pay it foreward. If I want quiet time to myself, and a clean enviornment, I just give my kid a big dose of my affection. It is so important to have fun together, like playing a game, going swimming at the YMCA, or just going for a walk. Getting out of the house saves me the mess, too. She is very happy to settle down quietly, after so much mommy time. If you're looking to reach out to them, try getting some one on one time with each of them every day. They will respect you for it. I don't think they really want someTHING from you. They just want to know how much they mean to you.

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T.N.

answers from Saginaw on

I do have to agree with scouts. I am tooo a leader for 2 troops. A brownie troop plus a Junior troop. There is alot of things taught about helping out the community. Like our scouts plant flowers in the spring for the city. Also on thinking day we do a can food drive for the pantrys. Last year my junior troop instead of payin dues every week we brought in can food for the city pantry. I know in our area we also have the mobile food drives. Were churches and political people buy truck loads of food and it gets given to families that come to the drive. It goes all over michigan. Also i am sure u have angel food ministiers down where ever u are. It is becoming a big thing in communities i am sure they could use some help. I know the church that does it here needs all the help they can get. Also i give the idea of ..... do they get an allowance ??? My kids i let them earn allowances. I gave them 12 dollars every 2 weeks but.... heres the catch 6 dollars comes back to us for a computer we bought them. Its almost paid off and i am sure something new will start. But they don't just get the allowance for doing stuff around the house they get it for their behavior too. Also......another idea i had was.... with things just get out right bad try sentence writing. My daughter was having trouble with keeping her hands to herself plus other bad behavior. I would write out a sentence and make her copy it. I only started with 25 and every time after she got 10 more added. She got up to 75 and realized OH BOY this an't fun and stopped her bad behavior in school. I realized that hey that worked lol My mother use to make us write them when i was younger..... so i started making my other daughter and nephew write them tooo for their actions. I know how u feel about the kids being close in age. My 2 daughters are also 8 and 7..... at times it gets it gets rough especially adding in the little guy and my brothers kids.... Good luck and hope this gives u some ideas

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A.A.

answers from Kalamazoo on

Good for you! It's so important to teach our children to live outside of themselves. My kids (4 and 21mos) have never been involved in any organizations but I do teach them to think of others and to share kindness and help with those around them. We've made cookies or bread for the neighbors, written letters to others, visited our elderly neighbors, and helped serve meals for the needy at the holidays. We've also saved money to donate canned goods to help the needy and gone to visit nursing homes. You could even have them rake someone's leaves this time of year or take a neighbor's newspaper to them. Anything you can think of to get them in the habit of putting others first will help. Think of something every week so that it becomes a natural part of who they are!

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T.B.

answers from Boise on

You hae some very good adivse given to you.
There are lots of places Children and Families can volunteer.

Nursing homes need people to come in and visit the ones that don't have family close by.

Scouts

Museums - In Nampa, ID they have the WarHawk Museum that need help and give classes.

Red Cross

Salvation Army

If they were 12 or older US Civil Air Patrol.

Human Society

Just have to figure out what need you can supply and find a place for it.

Autum is here. Elderly need there yards raked. Walk the neighborhood and if anyone needs any help.

Bake goods for your local first responders.

I could go on but the list would be to long.
Good Luck!

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M.B.

answers from Provo on

Like anything, kids truly learn my example. They will learn by watching you instead of you finding things for them since they are quite young. My kids are 4 & 6, so I was able to take them with me to deliver food to the elderly through Meals on Wheels. At the end of the day, I would ask them, "So, how many people did we help feed today?" I try to take them with me as best I can when they have a short day at school. There are many opportunities out there for the coming holidays to deliver food to needy families for Thanksgiving and Christmas. I find them through my church. Good luck!!!

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N.B.

answers from Milwaukee on

First -- Where do you live?

I am the Youth Programs Manager at the Volunteer Center (a division of the United Way in Waukesha County). If you live anywhere near Waukesha County, you could give me a call and I'd be able to give you specific ideas about volunteer opps.

If you do not live near Waukesha, I'd suggest that you start by looking at the actual NEED within your community -- this can be done by contacting your local Volunteer Center, United Way, or by calling 2-1-1 (if your community has this). They will be able to help you make quicker connections to those in need and may have further suggestions on projects that can be done.

Second -- I want to address the comment that suggested that kids could not volunteer with agencies due to child labor laws. This is absolutly false. It is true however, that many non-profit agencies do not accept young volunteers due 1) client confidentiality, 2) liability, 3) unmonitored youth volunteers can be more trouble than helpful. -- With this said, there are still many non-profits who welcome younger children as volunteers as long as they have an adult with them.

Here are a few volunteer ideas for helping kids understand the hardships others face:

*Cooking a holiday meal for a domestic violence/homeless/or other shelter

*Helping sort gifts at the Salvation Army during the holiday season -- kids can help pair gifts for other children to appropriate ages

*Throw a generic "Birthday Party" or holiday party for a children's group -- many non-profits run kids groups so that parents can get the services they need with out the concern of paying a sitter

*Visiting an elderly person -- singing songs for them, playing a game, or just visiting

*Making homemade holiday decorations or tray favors for hospitals, elderly facilities, home-bound meal delivery programs

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T.W.

answers from Lansing on

If you live in the Lansing area--Capitol Area Child and Family Sevices---They have foster kids that they give a Christmas party for every year and are always looking for volunteers to help. It could be a whole family affair! If not the party, then call them for names of foster kids to shop for this year. We do this, and it really does teach the kids about giving and how lucky they are to have a loving Mom and Dad.

Good luck! let us know what you decide to do!

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J.G.

answers from Milwaukee on

Just some ideas, If you belong to a church, they always have outreach programs going on especially during the Holidays. Have your kids help serve a meal at a shelter in the inner city they will see just how many people have it hard.
Have them go to the children's hospital at Christmas time and have them donate one of their new toys to a child that is terminally ill. If they actually see this with their own eyes it might sink in easier, sometimes just talking about it isn't enough, I hope some of this helps.

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J.M.

answers from Madison on

I have checked the United Way website for different volunteer opportunities. They do list activities that children can do and also family activities...it is a great resource! Here are some other ideas that are easy to do:
1.neighborhood/park pick-up - to make it more "fun" for the kids make it into a game and whoever picks up the most trash (with gloves of course) or fills the bag first wins (something non-material like they choose the family meal that night or something).
2. make holiday cards for a nursing home or children's hospital - get out some crayons, paper, glue, etc. and them let them deliver the cards.
3. Random Acts of Kindness - make it a fun "secret game" only your family knows about and shovel a neighbors driveway without them knowing (or rake a yard like someone else suggested) or deliver some baked goods to a neighbor's door.
I've found that making things into a game gets their initial interest going so they aren't being "forced" to do something for others than as they do it, they learn more empathy. Good luck :)

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