Need Some Help

Updated on October 04, 2007
C.F. asks from Fort Worth, TX
6 answers

Well due to my daughter being born at 24 weeks and almost not making it twice I am very scared to have anymore kids myself. The docs couldnt explain to my why she came so early and said it could happen agian. My hubby and I couldnt bare it if it happened again and would feel itwas our faults b/c we knew it could happen. I could never put a child through what all my little girl has gone through. I also have had 2 back surgeries and dont think I could physcially handle being pregant too and this all justs breaks my heart.
We want another child very badly even though we cant have one. I was wondering if anyone can help me out on a good place to contact for adoption that dosent just want to see how much money that you will give them. We have a friend that got super lucky and a girl they knew already had 2 kids that she couldnt take care of and got pregant again and let them adopt her child so it could have a better home and have what it truly needed. She paid for all her medical bills and shuch for the child. I sure whish I could stumble upon somehting like that and be able to give a child a wonderful loving home to be raised in.
My daughter is 4 1/2 now and keeps asking when her brother or sister is going to get here and tells me to just tell GOD to hurry and send it. I cry everytime after I tell her that mommy cant have anymore kids and tells me shes lonley and cries all the time. If I could have my own child I would by all means do it today but I cant. If anyone has a direction for me to go in please let me know I would love to know where to start. Thanks soooooo much girls~

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A.G.

answers from Dallas on

I'm sorry. I don't have any information for you. But you will be in my prayers. I will ask around though. I think I may know a few parents who have adopted. You are in my prayers. Please, don't be so hard on yourself. Let your little girl know what a special gift she is.

1 mom found this helpful
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K.K.

answers from Dallas on

Hi C.,

We adopted our son and are currently waiting on our second adoption. Our first one took 16 months and we have been waiting for 3 years for our second. That is not said to discourage you, only being honest and real. We worked with www.adoptionnetwork.com in California for our son and we switched to www.lifetimeadoption.com for our second. No real reason why California but we just liked them both. Our main reason for Lifetime is they are a christian based agency. You might also check with Adoption Alliance in San Antonio.(not sure of their website) They were kind of our liaison with our first adoption and the ladies there are wonderful. You are probably looking between $15-$30,000 wherever you go but be advised there is a tax credit now of I think about up to $10,500 per child based on your income. That has really made it affordable for our family.
I wish you luck in your process. Be patient and know it is all in God's timing. Oh yeah, we have an awesome social worker who has worked with us for the past 6 years on our home studies. If you would like his information feel free to e-mail me at ____@____.com

1 mom found this helpful
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A.L.

answers from Dallas on

You could maybe sign-up with Project Cuddle. It's not really an adoption agency, but they help pregnent teens and will hook them up with an adoptive family if that's what they need. They did a show on Oprah about it once. Go to www.projectcuddle.org to find out more.

Also, Steven Curtis Chapman has a foundation to help finance over-seas adoptions. I'm not sure of the web address, but the name of the organiztion is something like Shoshanna's Hope(?).
You could probably google search it and find out more.

Hope this is of some help. May God bless you as you find the child you were meant to have!

1 mom found this helpful
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J.W.

answers from Dallas on

Have you called the Gladney Center in Ft Worth?Gladney Center for Adoption - TX A Tradition of Trust--Founded more than a century ago as one man's mission to find loving homes for orphaned children, the Gladney Center stands today as a non-profit international leader in adoption and maternity services, specializing in international and domestic adoptions.
visit our website
see our waiting children

services: • Adoption Agencies • Adoption Attorneys • Birthmother Housing • Counselors & Therapists • Education & Training • Home Studies • International Adoption • Support (General) • Support for Adoptees/Birthparents
countries: • China • Colombia • Ethiopia • Guatemala • Kazakhstan • Mexico • Russia • Ukraine • Vietnam toll free (800) 452-3639
phone ###-###-####
fax ###-###-####
send us an e-mail
6300 John Ryan Drive
Fort Worth, TX 76132
www.gladney.org

ALSO: Hope Cottage
toll free (800) 944-4460
phone ###-###-####
fax ###-###-####
4209 McKinney Avenue
Dallas, TX 75205

http://directory.adoption.com/domestic/Texas.html
http://texas.adoption.com/
http://www.adoption.org/adopt/adoption-in-fort-worth.php

Mid Cities Pregnancy Ctr

###-###-####

MCPREGNANCY.ORG

1 mom found this helpful

L.A.

answers from Dallas on

How scary fpr you to go through that. It is a miracle your little girl survived!

My little brother was adopted from Korea. He has Reactive Attachment Disorder due to the neglect that Korean orphanages gave to infants at the time of his adoption. If caught early, it is something that can be worked out, but when he was a child, this disorder did not have a diagnoses or any positive treatment known, so yes, it has been a struggle, but he is still a wonderful part of our family. These are problems that can arise from some adoptions (but certainly not all!)

http://attachment.adoption.com/

There are a LOT of red flags in adoption agencies. Educating yourself is the best way to watch out for scams and potential problems. Here is a link to the transcript for a show Montel Williams had on recently about this. It is VERY informative and is a great resource for when you begin your hunt for an agency.

http://www.montelshow.com/show/detail/5076/
http://transcripts.tv/Welcome.aspx

Also, here are other posts on adoption in Mamasource, some share which agencies they used, and I'm sure many would be happy to assist you:

http://mamasource.com/requests/10877046321122902017/12030...

My friend recently adopted a child from Texas' CPS. She filled out a questionaire that asked what age/race/sex she preferred. She just wanted the child to be younger than her oldest child (7)and the rest didn't matter. She recieved a 2 year old hispanic boy, and he is just the sweetest thing ever.

If you are wanting a caucasion infant, it's a lot tougher, because they are in high demand, but if you are willing to take an older child or a child of any ethnicity, than you have an easier time.

Also, laws about adopting from state to state are very different, and each country has a set of laws that can make the process pretty rough. My one friend adopted internationally (can't remember where) and by the time she had her documents completed, the agency/country took so long approving them, that her documents had expired and she had to start the whole process (and paying for it) all over again. Having a great agency can help you cut through these types of problems.

Good luck, it is really worth it in the end! I have one child and am expecting my second, and I still would love to adopt in the future.

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D.B.

answers from Dallas on

You should contact agencies that are licensed non-profit agencies. They do charge fees but they are for the work the social workers do with the birthmom and with you the adoptive family. I used to be an adoption caseworker and cannot stress enough to make sure the agency you use is licensed by the state. Licensed agencies have to meet specific guidelines doing adoption that prevent the tragic stories you hear about birthparents coming back etc.... Every story I have heard on the news about someone coming back was because someone skipped a step in the process that must be competed. Someone in another post mentioned Glady and they are great. There is also Hope Cottage in Dallas and Christian Homes of Abilene. I would recommend attending an Adoption Orientation that all of these agencies will have and start gathering information. Good Luck!

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