Need Some Input: Considering Keeping Another Child Full-time

Hmm, that is a tough one, because I have done this for years and seen it work well, and not so great! One thing I never realized was the impact it has had on my kids. Although they have enjoyed a playmate, they have grown up with nothing feeling like it is theirs, including their mother. I allowed myself to watch more children than I should have, and feel confident that only one, or even two, would have made it easier, but at the end of the day, you are pretty tired! Again, I watch more children than that( but I did stand up for myself recently, and I will only be keeping one after my hubby gets a raise:). It can feel overwhelming to go to the store, cook dinner, etc..but at the same time, many a good mother has successfully raised twins (basically what you will be dealing with) so it can be done. As far as friendship goes, I have never had that problem, but I have done this as a buisness and had them sign a contract too. That way my expectations were clearly set. Let me know if you have any other questions! ~A.~

I would say go for it! but make sure she has a couple of back ups in case if illness or emergency.
I keep a set of triples M-F and occasionaly the twins from the same family and a preschooler full time. I hate not being able to browse at the store anymore but now when I am with my kiddos I LOVE them soo much more. dont get me wrong I love the kids I watch, play with and read to everyday but when I tuck mine in at night I am so thankful for the ones God gave me to have. :)
of course I have issues when I want to go and do things at my big kids school but you wouldnt have those same problems. Just look at your day now and see what you'd most miss and maybe your friend can take baby to grammy's 2x a month or on fridays somthing so you can do some things like dr appts (yours & your babys)
honestly it really helps me oganize my time as well
good luck
D.

I think your daughter will be fine. I had a in home childcare while my kids were young and they loved having playmates. The down side is you are committed everyday. No time alone and if you get sick she needs to have a back up. At the same time, it's just one other child and as long as you are able to treat her like your own-take her places etc you'll be fine.

S.,

I do inhome daycare and make it a policy not to keep for family or friends or neighbors.It almost never works out and you wouldn't want to have hard feelings over something later.I do referrals for an association I am in, and answer our voicemail-you would not believe how many people call and say that their friend,family member, ect..was keeping their child and it's not working out...happens alot. The states website to become listed ( you keep 3 or less children not related to you ) registered, or licensed is: www.tdprs.state.tx.us

Best wishes,
L.

Honestly, it could be agreat experience or a terrible one.

My mom did this when we were young and it was usually a very good experiance, but she had sweet children and failry normal parents. I have many friends that do it and some have been nightmares b/c the kids were poorly behaved, never dressed, the parents always "forgot" to pay, was always late picking them up...

But since you alredy know the girl and her mom, you know how they interact. Perhaps you can tell the mom you will give her a 2 week trial run to see how it works for everyone. Or, you can see about maybe doing it part time.

One thing about being sick or if she is sick, is to have a contract that states before it ever happens what you expect. That way, when problems arise, you won't have the uncomfort of bringing it up, as it will have already been resolved by the contract.

http://thedaycarelady.com/

This site has great forms and contracts you can print out, adjust for your own time/price and use. There are many things to consider like holiday pay, weekend, after hours, medical release form...

My son was kept by two friends when he was little, both for about 1 1/2 years. It worked out great for me (the working mom) because he got a lot of individualized attention and was with people I really trusted. As for the babysitters, I think it was a mixed blessing. They really enjoyed being able to stay home with their kids and still earn some money, and said it was good for their kids to have a playmate. However, I know they did feel tied down at times, and didn't have many of the stay at home mom freedoms that most do. They couldn't decide last minute to take a long weekend and go somewhere, because that put me in a bind. Also, it was hard when the kids or caregiver were sick. The second babysitter actually quit because her parents were getting older, and she didn't want the stress of having to leave at a moments notice to care for them and trying to handle my son as well. Hope this helps.

I think my kids have really benefitted from my home daycare. They have me all day (which we all LOVE), but at the same time they learn to interact with other kids and have a more structured schedule than they would if I wasn't taking care of kids. We slack off during vacation (I take care of teachers' kids so I have school vacations off) which is nice occasionally, but they really do well with structure. I've been more consistant during the school year with teaching them, too. So I doubt that my 2 1/2 year old would be beginning to sound out words, etc if I wasn't also teaching his "classmates" to read, etc. I've also had a lot of SAHM's comment that they wish their children would interact with other kids like mine do- a lot of kids are very shy when they only see other kids at playdates. Plus, with the kids you're talking about being so close in age, it will be easy to choose activities that they can both do. There are drawbacks though. Unless the mom approves and you think you can handle two toddlers in public, you won't be able to go on outings like you could before. I chose to only take teachers' kids b/c I really feel the need for holidays where we can do all those things and just spend time with eachother. Also, if you plan on having more children, you have to consider how much time you will request for maternity leave, and whether you really want to care for more children than your own once you have more than one. Plus, it could cause issues b/w you and your friend if you are not VERY clear about policies and procedures. You will need written policies to ensure that she doesn't assume you will care for her child when sick, late in the evening, etc. Since it's only one child you can get listed with the state instead of registered or licensed, you won't have to abide by any state regulations. I would recommend looking over the state's requirements for reg. & lic. childcare homes anyway to give you a starting point for your own rules. That's a tough call if you don't strictly NEED the income...good luck with your decision!

Although I am sure that there are a lot of people out there who highly recommend it and I am sure it works quite well for them, I found it to be very difficult to juggle when my child was sick, I was sick or when we had routine Dr's appointments, etc. I also watched the baby of a very good friend. I loved her with all of my heart, but when my kids got sick, I got sick, we had dr's appt's, out of town company, errands to run, things to do, etc. it became overwhelming. I felt like I had no time to myself. I watched and took care of the kids all day (no big deal - what's one more, right) and then after she left, I started bedtime routine...I was exhausted, but still had to clean my house for the next day and run to grocery store, etc in the evening because I didn't want to drag 3 kids to the grocery store. The kids did certainly get jealous from time to time and quite honestly I found myself taking care of her child's needs first and mine second. I also had an issue when we had an emergency (my son fell and his tooth was literally hanging in his mouth) and I needed to rush to the doctor. Just consider what it means to you and your time.