Need Some Opinions & Reassurance on C-sections!!!

Don'tworry the c-section no problem..only you be positive...I have 3 c-section y no had problem never..the first day is hard but nothing,imposible...only take easy...good luck J....

I would seek a second opinion. I'm assuming you're seeing a perinatalologist. I would take their opinion much more heavily than your OB's. Many people assume c-sections are safer for conditions and they aren't always. They aren't a "safety net" for everyone which is how they tend to be used.

First off, unless you have some underlying medical condition, there is no way a c-section would be safer for you than a normal vaginal delivery. Having a c-section opens you up for many risks at the time as well as risks to your potential future pregnancies.

As for the baby, it of course depends on your baby's condition. For a baby with no problems a vaginal delivery is much healthier (in fact a recent study found that babies of mothers who had c-sections for no medical reason and choice only had a 3 times higher mortality rate). Your case is obviously different than the women in the study, but consider that babies of cesarean deliveries have more respiratory difficulties, blood sugar problems, higher breastfeeding failure rates, and more. Obviously you have to weigh this against the risk of complications from your son's heart condition.

Also, was your first son born vaginally? Did he have complications related to his delivery? Just curious why they recommend a c-section this time.

Good luck to you, it's a tough decision to make.

J.,

I had an emergency c-section with my daughter and let me tell you it was an expirence! It was not a bad one though. It was a little funny being in the operating room awake because I was able to hear everything that was going on and my husband pretty much told me step by step what they were doing. It was not a long procedure (I think I was in there for about 30 minutes). The after effect is a lille difficult though. I had to stay in the hospital for 4 days after I had her because they were monitoring my blood pressure so that was easier on me with her. It was hard when I got home with her because I had decided that she would go to the nursery every night so having her 24hours for the first couple of days was weird. It was a long recovery process. It does usually take 3 to 6 weeks to get back to normal. And let me tell you I was at the 6 weeks mark. However, not a real bad expirence. My mom took off of work for the first week I was home so that did help but after that I was on my own. Every now and again a friend would come by for a few hours but not often.
I am rambling sorry. I do wish you good luck!
J.

Hi J.,
I have had both a c-section and a vaginal delivery (without epidural) and the natural delivery was MUCH better in terms of recovery and having to take care of another child (2 yrs old at the time). Since my 1st son was born via emergency c-section and suffered a stroke in utero, my OB recommended a repeat c-section. Well, there was absolutely no reason for me to have major surgery since my baby was fine and they couldn't tell me why my first baby had a stroke. I did an enormous amount of research on c-section vs. vaginal and the evidence is OVERWHELMINGLY in favor of vaginal delivery for both the mother and baby's health. Neonatal outcomes have not improved even though there are more babies born via section today than ever. Not to mention it is extremely difficult to breastfeed after a c-section especially if you do not have a lot of help at home for the first few weeks. I agree with the other woman who recommended getting a second opinion. If the doc can tell you exactly why is it safer for your baby to be delivered surgically then that will help you decide. Their answer will help you determine whether there really is a medical reason or if they are just practicing defensive obstetric medicine (of no benefit to you). Good luck with your upcoming birth!!!

J.,

Let me preface this by saying, everyone's experiences are different. However, I had a c-section and never regretted it. The recovery didn't seem any longer. (I had an appendectomy in January 2002, and that hurt so much worse than my c-section!) The only thing the doctor said was not to lift anything heavier than the baby for a few weeks and take it easy on stairs. I didn't need any narcotics or pain killers (other than Motrin) once I came home. When I found out that I needed a c-section, eveyone felt compelled to tell me absolute HORROR stories. I'm here to let you know that c-sections aren't all bad!!

I just wanted to voice MY opinion on this all. Having a C-secion is not bad for you or your baby. My mother delivered myself, and my two sisters by C-Section. We were all healthier than most kids growing up and had no lasting effects or problems that they are "finding with kids of C-sections".

I delivered my son in 2005 by an unplanned C-section. The worst part of the entire ordeal was getting in and out of bed when I got home .... your abs are pretty shot after ... so I found my "way" and soon got the hang of it. I was fine walking upstairs the day I was released from the hospital, I just ha dto take it slow. No heavy lifting for a few weeks. But, like others have said, within 2 weeks I was feeling 100% better ... I even took a mile walk after the first week!

I was bale to take care of my son, and myself ... my husband and family were back to work within the first week. Attitude is helpful too ...
L.

I have had two C-sections and I wish i could tell you that it is a quick recovery .. but 3-6 weeks is not acurate for getting back to feeling normal... it will take at least 2 weeks for you to be up to doing things normally .. walking around will be painful.. caring for a 4 year old on your own .. would be very hard... I am sorry to be the bearer of bad news.. but I don't want you to go into this blindly.. although i would never even attempt to have a "regular" delivery because after my first C-section i had a choice... I wanted another C-section for many reasons... anyways.. You will be fine either way .. just try to find someone to be home with you or take your 4 year old to daycare for at least 2 more weeks after your husband goes back to work.. that would make a world of difference... good luck and god bless..
P.

Hi J.

It can't hurt to get a second opinion. I am assuming your son was born vaginally, and knowing he has the same heart problem should reassure you about the chances for a safe vaginal birth this time, seeing as he was not hurt by it.

The physiological experience of labor and birth is highly beneficial to a baby. They need the pressure of the rhythmic contractions and the path through the birth canal to help them expel fluid from their lungs and stomach to enable them to begin breathing. This is why so many babies born via c-section experience respiratory distress; I personally would not want to subject a baby known to have a compromised heart to that. I certainly would suggest researching all the known risks inherent to a surgical delivery before making a decision.

As for help following the delivery, look for a postpartum doula. Some can be pricey, but a great way to find lower priced doulas is to hire a doula in training who needs the work to complete her certification. I am a certified birth doula, however I am a part of a network of birth and postpartum doulas and would be happy to help you in finding someone who could help. Feel free to contact me if you would like more information.

Good luck,
A.

Hi, J. ~ I had a c-section 2 years ago and honestly it really wasn't that bad. I really expected it to be worse than it was, but as long as you take the pain medication, you'll be feeling somewhat okay. You're not supposed to do too much in the first 2-3 weeks afterwards, but after that you should be feeling okay. You're definitely going to have to take it easy, though, for a while. My husband was with me the first two weeks and like you I had no one to help me out after he returned to work and I managed just fine. You might want to look into seeing if you could find someone to help you out for a few weeks after your husband returns to work. It's all going to be depend on how you feel. Good luck and I hope everything goes well for you. :-)

Hi J.!
I read some of the responses that you have recieved and decided that I needed to write to you...to reassure you that a c-section is not that bad at all...the recovery isn't even all that bad.
I had my first c-section unscheduled 4 years ago. My son was born at 35 weeks and he was breech so I had no choice, and let me tell you that I was scared to death. The nurses and doctors were wonderful and explained everything that was going on and what to expect. IF you have questions ASK! After I delivered I wasn't even able to hold my son because they had to rush him to the NICU, but they took his picture for me and brought it to me so I at least knew what he looked like. Within 8 hours I was up and walking by myself to the nursery to visit and feed him. I only took pain medication for the first 12 hours because I was afraid not to...however, after that I didn't even need motrin. We were both home in four days.
When I got home, I made sure everything I needed was on the first floor where I planned on spending most of my time so I didn't have to run up and down the stairs. I just made sure to take it easy, don't try to clean, do dishes, or even take a shower if you don't want to. Within 2 weeks I was completely back to normal.
For my second c-section things were pretty much the same except I had an 18 month old baby at home...again, I made sure that I had everything I needed within close reach and remembered not to stress about the small stuff. Your son is at least old enough to be able to help you out so take advantage of that, if something isn't close ask him to get it for you. It also helped that my husband made sure that my son's lunches were made so all I had to do was heat them, so that is an idea. I did not need pain medicine with my second child and was out of the hospital within 36 hours.
I am now having my third c-section in July. If you expect the worst you will be suprised how easy it actually is. I hope this helps.
Good Luck!
J. M

I have had 3 c-sections. I also had no help at my home we did not live near family and my husband was working just after i got home from the hospital. They are harder to recover from than a vaginal birth but not that bad. Take advantage of all the hospital time you can. And also watch how much weight you are carring around NO LAUNDRY!!! Have your husband bring you the clean cloths after he has washed them. If you rest when you can and watch the weight you carry the recovery is not bad. I was just fine 3 weeks after my third. I kept lunchs simple and made dinners in advance and had them in the deep freezer so all we had to do for dinner is thaw and heat up. I did let my kids watch way to much tv while I was recovering but it was not that bad to get back into our normal routines. Also remember that it is okay if the house is a mess or the dishes arn't put away. The baby doesn't care and you need to be ready to take care of him/her so don't over do it. If it doesn't have to be done, than it will wait. I hope this helps if you want more info my email is ____@____.com

Hi J.,

I had a c-section with my now 7-month old. It was not planned and I was scared too. I didn't feel any pain after the spinal block but once I got home, the pain was unbelievable. Make sure you fill your prescription for pain meds BEFORE you go home. I made the mistake of not doing that and I paid big time. Yes, the first 2-3 weeks are hard. You have to move very slow and only take care of yourself and the baby. It does get better, just be sure to take care of your stitches. Get as much help as you can and don't be afraid to ask. This is major surgery, so don't be hard on yourself. Give yourself plenty of time to heal. Congrats on the new baby and good luck!

S.

Hi, I know people recover differently but I faired pretty well after both of m c- sections. It took me a couple weeks of course to get into the swing of things but I was fully functioning and back at work at a daycare center just after 6 weeks. Just take it easy, don't worry about housework or anything else, just enjoy your two little ones.

The actual procedure is not that bad, you'll feel a little pressure and tugging, then it's done. Afterwards, yes you are very sore but I promise it gets better every day! I'm the biggest wimp ever and I survived two. Write back if you need to talk. N.

I had an emergency c-section with my son in 2002 . I was 10days late and his heart rate was dropping. I was so afraid at first - but so happy I would not have to push an almost 9 pd baby out. I have friends of mine that were stitched up so badly b/c of labor. And they never were the same again down there. You will be sore - but it's not that bad. I was lucky that my husband did most of the diaper changes and my mother helped out too. I wish the best for you and your baby.

J.,

I will tell you my story in hopes that it will givce you a realistic view-point. I had a c-section in October to deliver our first child (had planned on a natural birth, but my son's heartrate decelerated and it became an emergency situation). The operation itself was not that bad. I asked for my arms to be free so I could touch the baby and I could only feel some tugging but no pain during the surgery. I stayed four days in the hospital and was on pain medication that lessened the pain, but I was still uncomfortable. I couldn't even turn on my side to sleep because it hurt so bad. Every bump in the road driving home could be felt and when I got home I hobbled around kind of hunched over.

My husband was able to take a week off of work, so I only had a few days at home with him. My mom was able to spend two weeks with me after he went back to work. I was able to get around better by that point, but was still only going up and down the stairs once per day - came down in the morning, spent the day on the main floor, and went back up at night. My biggest problem was stamina - I was constantly exhausted from taking care of my son. My mom was able to help by cooking, cleaning, doing the dishes and laundry, going grocery shopping, and *most importantly* taking the baby and letting me take naps.

My advice would be that if you do have to have a c-section (and if it were me, I would really question my doctors reasoning for recommending one and do my own research online) that you hire a mommy's helper for the first couple weeks. Basically they do whatever you need them to do - watch your son, dishes, grocery shopping, laundry, etc. I am a person who recovers from things quickly (like I just had surgery on a Thursday and was up and about the next day) so I was surprised at how difficult the c-section recovery was. For our next child, I will do everything I can to have a vaginal birth so that I can avoid the recovery.

If you want any more information or if I can help in any way - please let me know. There is also a local support group for moms who had to have c-sections (it can be a traumatic experience and some moms have a difficult time dealing with it) called ICAN. I haven't been to a meeting, but I'm sure they can give you more information. Best of luck to you!

L.

Sorry to add one more - I'll keep it short.

I've had 4 c-sections in 5 years and here's what I'd pass on:

1. Ask the anesthesiologist to lower the curtain at the time of birth. I did this for all 4 and it meant so much to see my child come out of my body. It is not yucky because you can't see inside from your position.

2. I finally learned the 4th time around to take the pain meds (at 3 different hospitals I had alternate doses of vicodin and ibuprofen), whether you feel like you need them or not. I tried to be a hero the first few times because I hate medication, but it really helped me recover faster the last time around. I tried the morphine pump for child number 3 but that just kept the level of pain constantly tolerable.

3. Get out of bed and move around as soon as you are given the green light, but DO NOT LIFT ANYTHING! I did too much the day after number 2 was born and my incision split wide open.

4. Ask for a stool softener. You do not want to be struggling with a bowel movement after a c-section.

5. Make sure your staples (if you get them) are removed before your hospital visit is over.

You will recover much faster than you think will be possible. The first few days are rough but go by fast.

God bless!

J.

Hi J....I'm sorry that I don't have an answer to your c-section question as I have not had one. But your question caught my attention because you mentioned that your baby has a heart defect and so does your older son. I am going to be having our second daughter the last week of March and she has a heart defect called pulmonary atresia with VSD. None of my doctors have mentioned a c-section to me and have said I can do natural birth as long as everything goes ok.

I guess if you don't mind sharing some information with me I would really appreciate it. We know the baby will need a procedure in the first week of life and have chosen to go to Hope Childrens' Hospital in Oak Lawn. The first procedure will not be open heart surgery. I don't know where your son had his procedures but can you shed any light on which hospital you chose and if you were happy/unhappy with the staff? We're getting a little more nervous these last couple of weeks and hope we made the right choice in hospitals.

Also, if you have any advice on dealing with the condition, I'd love to hear that too. Understand you must have your hands full so don't worry if you can't write back. Thank you!

hi there,
i had a c-cection last year. my twin girls are almost 11 months old now, and as far as i know i have no problems (i lost my insurance some months ago, so no more doctor appts for me).
we didn't know for sure if it was going to be a c-section or not till 20 mints or so before the actual c-cection.
as much as i always dreaded a natural, vaginal delivary - i was mortified of the "big needle" in my back. i dand all i felt was as gloved hands touched my back - that was it.
during the c-section all i felt was some preasure as the babies were pulled out one at a time.
we only had to stay at the hospital for 3 days. if you do everything that the doctors and nurses tell you you should be ik.
ONE OF THE MOST IMPORTANT THINGS while still at the hospital, is to start walking as soo as you are allowed to get up!! getting out of bed was actually way more painful thn walking. but walking, they told me, was to help healing and to help your body pass gas - wich is very, very important.
i know going to the bathroom is something private, but you might want to have somebody there to help you get off the toilet.
once we got home i didnt have help for very long ( and had to take care of twins). getting up was the most painful part, but once up i was able to get around slowly.
i guess i can say that i am very happy with my c-section.
sorry i went on for so long, hope this was helpful.
dont be csared,take care and good luck

Hi J. -

If a c/s is medically required, they are in fact, wonderful, life saving surgeries. If you want more information, specifically on recovery, you can go to the ICAN (International Cesarean Awareness Network) website, and read the white pages. About half way down there are links to recovery/post-partum information.
http://ican-online.org/resources/white_papers/index.php

I had a c/s in 2002 under general anesthesia and a VBAC in 2004.

If you decide to have the c/s, you may want to ask for a duramorph to be given at the end of surgery - it provides several hours of pain relief.

You will also probably want a little bit of extra help around the house in the first few weeks following the baby's birth. I know I had a hard time going up/down stairs, standing at the sink to do dishes or to cook or get clothes out of the washer. Also, don't hesitate to ask for help. People want to hold the baby, and let you do the work, but it should really be the other way around - YOU hold the baby, let THEM do the work.

Wishing you the best.

Hi there,

I had a c-section 3 years ago. I had twins and this was my first delivery. The c-section surgery is nothing to worry about. If you want your husband in the room with you when you're having the surgery, they will give you a spinal to numb you from the waist down. You'll be awake. You can't feel a thing! They give you this medicine to drink before hand as well so you don't get sick when they are performing the surgery. It is a little uncomfortable when they have you walk around for the first time after the surgery but it's really nothing at all. You can't drive for 2 weeks after the surgery and they tell you not to walk stairs for about a week or so. That's really about it. A lot of my friends have had c-sections as well and they've all be fine. It's scary to know that you're having a major surgery but the doctor's really know what they are doing.

Hope this helps!

J.,
As you can see, everyone has a different experience. My daughter was born by C-Section 3 yrs ago and it wasn't easy for me. My best advice, other than agreeing with the doula person who responded about getting another opinion,, would be to take your pain medication on schedule. Do Not Skip any doses! Call and schedule a doula to come and help out. Birthways or Birthlink are both wonderful. You will need someone to help out with your son and the new baby. One week off may seem like a lot, but you will soon realize you could have used an entire year. Just listen to your body. You know how much you can handle. Don't try to do too much. And no up and down the stairs. Good Luck!

I have had 3 c-sections. The first time I let myself "take things slow". Don't make that mistake!! I know it will be uncomfortable but the sooner you get moving the better it will be. I got up and moving earlier with my second and the recovery time was faster. With my third I was up at the hospital and doing laps in the hallway( pushing my son's crib- ok leaning on his crib) within 24 hours. The nurses were amazed but I knew I had a 6 1/2 yr old and a 3 1/2 yr old at home. My husband was home for the first week and my mom came to help out during the day for the next week. One thing I suggest is prepare at home for it. Cook meals in advance so you only have to reheat. After surgery if you sleep on your side make sure you sleep with a pillow under your stomach for support. Do not be afraid of taking pain meds. You will only be hurting yorself and your children if you do not take them. Make sure you have activities you can do with your 4 yr old handy and make sure they are physically simple. Most important is to keep a positive attitude and remember that it is all worth it no matter how the baby comes. Good Luck and congratulations one your new little one.

hi! my 2nd child was a c-section, because of being breech. i did not have a bad/good experience with it. my boys are 15months a part, so it was difficult in the begining. everyone heals differently too. i needed help picking up and putting down my oldest out of the crib. when my husband went back to work, i would have our neighbor come and pick him up for me. you will need help though, hopefully your friends,neighbors or any relative can help at least in the 1st 6 wks of recovery. i live in lombard, if you need help let me know!

dear J.,
I certainly don't want to worry or frighten you about the c-section. but I was not at all prepared... had no idea I would end up having an emergency c-section... and it was really really difficult afterwards. the first month at home was brutal. I had my mother say with us for 1 week. my husband had only 3 days off work. especially at the hospital and that first week at home, you'll hardly be able to move. just getting up from a seated position was majorly uncomfortable. I couldn't get our son out of and into the crib by myself b/c I had to have someone hand him to me once I was sitting down so that he could nurse. I would really suggest that you ask your mother or mother-in-law to take some days off work to help out after your husband goes back to work. or even to help during that first week. I really didn't feel anything close to normal for about 3 months, but the 1st month was the hardest. thankfully your son is 4 and not still an infant/young toddler himself. that will make things easier. if you have friends, ask them to bring food or come over and cook for you. simple activities are going to be much harder, and with the lack of sleep with new baby, it's tough.
this all said, a friend of mine had a c-section last year and felt great almost immediately. after 1 month she was totally normal.
another suggestion: after the surgery, put that baby on the breast immediately. you'll be shaking uncontrollably and very cold after the surgery. but as soon as my son started nursing (I was still in the post-op room) my shaking stopped completely. it was so amazing. you'll have to be lifted into a sitting position.. it will be very awkward. but just do it.
also, take ALL the drugs they give you. I thought I didn't need them at first b/c the epidural hadn't totally worn off... once it did... man... I knew I needed the vicadin. don't feel bad about taking it. I usually hate taking those things but it's totally necessary!
i would also suggest reading about c-sections.... I skipped all of that b/c I never in a million years thought I'd have one... mistake on my part... and again I was totally unprepared.
afterwards you really need to take it easy. you cannot exercise until at least after your 6 week check up and I doubt you'll feel like it then... some light walking was about all I could do for a while. but then I started doing some yoga at home and that really helped get be back to normal, strengthen the core muscles....
hope this helps. don't be scared. it's kind of amazing what modern medicine can do. but since you have to chance to prepare yourself, I would.

Hi J.,
I've had 2 c-sections within the past 3 years. (Both my babies were breach.) I agree that you will probably want some more help than is readily available. I too would try to ask the parents and in-laws to take a little time off work to help. Between them it wouldn't be too much time off if they each take a couple days...and it would help you tremendously. I also suggest you take the FULL amount of time in the hospital as is allowed by insurance. Especially with the 4 year old that would naturally want mommy to play with him and such. That extra recovery time will help you a lot. The pain is really not that bad. The actual birth is really neat because you don't have pain and it's a neat experience. What really hurts is the first time you are trying to walk again, but the sooner the better for faster recovery. Also it hurts when you cough or laugh and gas pains since air gets trapped in there from the surgery. In all honesty, the recovery was slow with the first. It took a good 2 months before I could be comfortable going for a walk. (I tried at 6 weeks going to the mall, got through the anchor store and to the mall part and then panicked as to how I was going to get back to the car. :) ) It took a good 6 months before my stomach wasn't so sensitive anymore. It did take quite a while. My body healed incredibly fast after the second though. While I was still in the hospital (taking the full M-F there), I was feeling so much better that I felt like I was staying in a hotel. I was still getting around slow, but the pain was more uncomfortable than pain and I was more mobile sooner. With the first I lived on the main level for a while (like a week or so) and it was difficult to move, so I had a lot of help with people bringing the baby and things to me. With the second, I was trying to remind myself not to lift things and to limit the stairs because I felt fine to do so otherwise. Best wishes to you!!! And I hope you are able to get some help for after the baby is born! You definitely don't want to do too much so you are not damaging the internal incision or anything.

Hi J.,
I have 3 boys that were all C-sections. 2 were emegency C-sections and my 3rd son was breech and was a scheduled C-section. The hardest part of the C-section for me was the spinal. I have a herniated disc in my back and the spinal was incredibly painful for me. With my 3rd son, the anesthesiologist pricked a hole in my spinal fluid and I had a horrible migraine. I had to stay an extra day in the hospital and lay flat on my back drinking tons of water. If that hadn't taken care of the situation, they were going to have to go in and put a patch on the hole. As far as recovery goes, my boys are less than 2 years apart, so when I had my youngest son, I had a 21 month old and almost 4 year old at home to take care of when I got out of the hospital. It helped tremendously to know exactly when the c-section was going to take place. I had bought all the diapers, wipes, etc, and made double casseroles to freeze one for additional meals when I got home. My church was great! They had different families bring us dinner the first week we were home. I did have my little sister stay at our house and help me with the older 2 while I was trying to take care of my new baby. The first 3 days after the surgery are the worst, after that, you just take it slow. When the baby is sleeping, you should try to lay down and rest as well. Don't worry about housework and laundry. Have your hubby cover that - you need to use all your extra time to recuperate. Since I have never delivered vaginally, I don't have anything to compare a c-section to, but if you have the opportunity to get a second opinion to erase the doubts you are having.

Prayers are with you!
C. Barduson
____@____.com
http://www.workathomeunited.com/C.

I was scared to death too,because my sister told me horror stories. It turned out that she must be a baby. I couldn't feel a thing during the surgery except nausea. After surgery, I kept pushing the morphine button, so I had little pain. The only thing that hurt was when the nurse would periodically push on my stomach to push out the blood. It wasn't unbearable. I couldn't move or get out of bed for 2 days. By the third day I could go to the bathroom by myself and took a shower. Recovery at home was fine too. I was able to care for the baby and myself. Getting the staples removed was a breeze too. I was ready to go back to work within a few weeks. I even went shopping for a breast pump by myself carrying the baby in her carseat during the second week. Hope this helps.

It is a MAJOR surgery and even though it is very common these days, it is not something to take lightly!! There can be sooo many complications because, after all, it IS surgery and it's not what nature intended for your body.

Please do lots of reading and weigh your pros and cons before you decide, and realize too that they CANNOT assure you health and wellbeing for either of you no matter what option you choose, unfortunately.

I am studying to be a labor doula and it is incredible some of the stories that I have to read and how crass the doctors can be in the operating room, etc. I can tell you also from my sister's experience in having a c-section that it has been 7 years since the birth of her son and she has suffered both emotionally and physically from hers... she wasn't able to pick up her son for the first year she was in so much pain, she dealt with a hernia because of a 'mistake' that was made... the list goes on and on, not to mention the emotions of not feeling like she gave birth, the depression, etc.

I hate to come across as some extremist nut, but I did want to respond to you because it does sound like you aren't sure. Get a second opinion and a third... read up, talk to everyone you can in AND out of the medical field... this is a VERY important decision that most likely will affect you for the rest of your life! Google the issues your baby has, try looking at it from both pro and con and read up on both sides, as well as personal experience sites, etc.

No matter what, it is crucial that you feel at peace with the choice you make because that plays a big part in what happens in the delivery room- be it a "natural" birth or surgical.

Best of wishes,
Amanda

Hi J.,
I have 3 children. The last two were c-sections. I had my first totally naturally so when I found out that I was going to need a c-section, I was a little freaked out. It really wasn't all that bad. I felt ok afterwards and had family and friends tell me "I can't believe you just had a c-section, you look great" The second one was scheduled so it was a little different. I ended up getting a spinal with a narcotic. If we go for #4 I'd just ask for the spinal. I had the dry heaves for 2 days afterwards. I didn't have much problem in the pain area. No IV pain meds. just extra-strength tylenol. I felt better than when I had my firstborn. And I didn't have to spend half an hour after peeing taking care of that area. The staples do not hurt when they are removed.
The biggest piece of advice I would give you now is to get ready NOW. Open up diaper packages and get the wipes ready. Make sure everything is clean and ready for the baby NOW, so you won't have to do that when he comes home. Make sure you have groceries in the house, get some easy crock pot meals in the frozen section, make menus of easy stuff. C-section or not, you are going to feel a little off kilter for the first couple of months of having to juggle the needs of a newborn and a preschooler. Best of luck and good wishes being sent your way!!!!

Hi J.,
I feel for you. I had a scheduled c-section with my son in May because he was breech. It was NOT what I wanted and I was terribly disappointed about the whole experience. I honestly can say that, while I would never choose to have a c-section, it wasn't as bad as I thought. Here's what I would recommend you do to prepare for it:
1. Have a nice dinner out the night before with your husband.
2. Get him to shave about the top 1-2 inches of pubic hair for you. They will do this in the hospital for you if you don't do it yourself, and I promise, they won't be as nice about it as your husband is :) Save yourself the trouble.
3. Tell your baby that he's going to be born before the surgery. Talk to him. Relax, and try and use all of the relaxation techniques that you'd normally employ during labor.
4. Take all of the energy that you'd normally put into having the baby and channel it into healing your body. I know the last two points sound a little hokey, but I think it really helped me.

Schedule the surgery for as early in the AM as you can and things will run on time.

Here's what they did for mine:
We got to the hospital. They monitored the baby for a while, would have shaved me had I not done the job myself, and I walked into the OR. I had spinal anaesthesia, which was icky feeling, but makes you numb from your chest downward. They drape you and you can't see anything. Your husband will be let in about that time. They will have the baby out in about 5-10 minutes after they start. They showed me my son right away and since we didn't know the baby's sex, the doc actually didn't say anything - instead had my husband stand up and look over the drapes to see the baby first - which was great. Once he was all wiped off and swaddled they handed him to my husband, who sat right next to my head, so I could see him. They probably took another 30 minutes to sew me back up (did a really nice job) but I didn't care because I was so amazed at our baby then.

In recovery I was able to breastfeed right away and hold my son. I had the surgery on Friday morning and was out of the hospital on Monday.

Here are some things I would suggest in terms of recovery:
1. Have someone else do ALL the diaper changes for the first week.
2. Get some friends to bring over meals for you guys too.
3. Get out of bed the first day. At least swing your legs over the side and stand up.
4. If it's not super painful, you might just dose up on ibuprofin instead of taking narcotics. I opted for this because I hate feeling out of it. I found the pain to be very tolerable.
5. Take a walk the second day. Even if it's only to the bathroom and back. Try and take a short walk each day - longer each successive day.
6. Keep your baby right next to you in the bedroom. Have your husband hand him to you to feed at night and change the diapers for the first couple weeks.

You will not believe it, but 2 weeks post surgery you will feel 150% better. I actually went for a bike ride 5 weeks post surgery. (And this is the one advantage to a scheduled c-section... try and find a woman who gave birth vaginally who wanted to see a bike seat 5 weeks afterwards!)

Good luck! Everything will be great.

I just had a csection 3 1/2 months ago. I have two beautiful girls and had I known how easy a csection was I would have had one with the first child. I did not plan to have one, after 2 1/2 hours of pushing and NO PROGRESS we had no choice and thank God she was all wrapped up in the cord. Delivery wise, it was very easy, and fast. The one thing that was upsetting was I was in recovery for about an hour during which everybody was visiting with the baby except me. They gave me moriphine that I used only occassionally. DO GET UP AS SOON AS THEY SAY TO! The more you move the better you are going to feel. And don't walk all hunched over. You need to stand tall and straight. Don't over do it, going to the bathroom is plenty in the beginning. Sit in the chair and rotate from the bed, so you are not just laying there. When you get home, you will need some help. My husband was home for a week. After that we managed on my own. Use your 4 year old to help too. You'll know when you over do it, you'll be extra sore and bleed more. It does take all of 6 weeks to fully recover to the point of going to the gym and stuff like that, but you'll be able to go shopping and stuff after about 3 weeks. Everybody is different though. It really isn't that bad. I would do it again in a heart beat.
Hope this helped.
Good luck, God bless you and your family.
L.

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I was scared to death to have a c-section with my second pregnancy, but since I was having twins, it was for the best. I had an extremely active three year old at home and two babies to take care of, so I didn't think I was going to be able to handle it. I was scared of the pain too! But, it turned out to be the easiest thing ever! After the twins were born, my one baby had to stay in the NICU for a while; I was up and wlking from my room to the NICU the next day. It only took about 4-5 days for the pain to completely go away! It was not as hard as I expected, and it was the best thing for my babies. You'll do fine, just keep up on your pain meds and start walking as soon as they let you! Good Luck!

J.,
I had an unplanned c-section now 4 years ago. I had no intention of having a C-section or an epidural. I made sure my OB new that I did not want any of that.
The epidural was the best thing ever invented, I immediately could not feel any contractions and therefore, no pain during or immediately following. As a previous person said, having decided this wasn't going to happen, did nothing to prepare for it either. I do wish I had paid more attention because I would have told them I wanted our daughter to nurse immediately. I had a lot of trouble nursing or getting my milk to come in with a screaming, starving newborn. My milk didn't truely come in for two weeks.
I would also do as a former person said and see if your mom or mother-in-law can help out after your husband goes back to work. I was in the same situation, my husband was off for the first week and then my mom stayed with us. I don't know how I would have done it without her. You cannot drive for two weeks after anyhow. My mom brought us to our daughter's two week check up. I felt much better after the staples were removed. Also, it seemed like it would never be better at the time but after a while, it is fine.
Best wishes and congratulations on your newest family member soon.

I had a c-section with my second child.

I just have to say that I really believe that YOU are in charge of how long your recovery time will be. If you want to recover quickly you can make that happen, if you have the time you can recover at your leisure.

I had my daughter 12/22 at about 1:00 and so badly wanted to be home by xmas eve for my 1yo son that I was walking around the night I had surgery. I didn't take any pain meds except for the motrin. My doctor let me go home 12/24 morning! I spent 3 days at my mom's house and then I went home and did not experience any pain at all - after all, I had to recover quickly becuase I also had a 1 year old!

There was discomfort, but nothing extremely painful. The hardest part is that 3 inches or so you have to move when you are getting up from a semi-reclined position to sitting straight up (like in the hospital bed).

But please keep a careful eye on that incision, if you do feel a large amount of pain know that it is not normal and you might have an infection. I have heard that infection can be common and dangerous if not caught right away - even my family doctor got an infection afte her c-section!

Don't be scared! You're a mom and just like always you will come through when you are needed!

I've had 2 c-sections, the 2nd one, my oldest son was 3 1/2 and very full of energy, what child isn't :) Unfortunately at the time of my second child my husband and I had seperated, so I was doing this all on my own. When my baby was born @ NIMC they transferred him to Lutheran due to some problems. I had the c-section at 8am and was up walking (with pain meds)by 8pm that night and out of the hospital down to Lutheran by noon the next day. It is painful, but you get meds and you can't lift anything over a certain weight. I actually think that this helped my oldest son feel really involved with his brother because I needed his help for a lot of things...so he felt really included and they are great brothers (at least for now). I have no family here, so it was just me and my two boys, once I got home I rested when the baby rested (my oldest was going to daycare during the day, but I managed to get through it. You will do great! I hope that you don't get to many scary stories, just remember, everyone's experience is different and the docs are only looking out for you and your child.

Good luck.

I was in your boat 3 weeks ago. I had my first son (2y4m)totally natural no epidural, nothing. I was expecting the same with my second. At about 34 weeks, my second was found to be breech on ultrasound. They reassured my that she would turn, but never did. I delivered her by C section on 1/24/07.

I was not so afraid of the section itself but the recovery from major abdominal surgery and having a needy little one at home. The section was not bad at all, much easier than natural child birth. Recovery was not nearly as bad as I expected. Key is to move after surgery. Get up and walk... After coming home it is helpful to have your husband there the first week, but you still need to move.

I cried for weeks about the section and I must say it was not that bad. Let me know if you have specific questions...

L.

Hi there,

I have had two c-sections. One emergency, and the other scheduled. Let me tell you that the scheduled one is WAAAY easier than the emergency. Yes, the recovery can be tough, but it is not so horrible that you won't be able to move. The first few days are the worst, but it does get progressivly better. Maybe you can look into getting a night nurse to help you, or even a day nurse. I would suggest an extra pair of hands for a little bit, but if not, you can do it. The night time seemed to be the hardest for me, but at least you will be able to rest the first week home. That is most important. Best of luck to you!

J. - Karen's advice is 100% on. After my c-section I felt 100% better in a week and a half. Her explanation of what happens during surgery is the same as what happen to me. Also if you have sensitive skin ask them to go easy on the tape, I had terrible almost burns from all if the tape that they used. When I go for my 2nd c-section I plan on asking for paper tape. If you have any other specific questions feel free to e-mail me at ____@____.com.
C.

J., congrats on your second baby! Definitely research your options and get a second opinion. But give yourself permission to be okay with the answers you get. If all of your research and second or third opinions point to cesarean, don't be disappointed or feel like you've failed. Your job as the mom is to do what you feel is best for your baby. I'm a labor doula and believe completely in the power of natural birth. But you need to decide which way is best for you and your baby.

As far as recovery, look into hiring a postpartum doula. They can help with breastfeeding, light housework, meal preparation, etc. They can help you rest and take care of your new baby. www.birthlink.com lists birth professionals in the Chicago area. Doula certifying organizations also have lists. try www.cappa.net www.dona.org Fees may vary, so if you find several in your area, give them all a call! Find someone you click with and she can help you get the rest you need to recover from birth.

Good luck!
R.

I had a surprise C-section with my first baby. The surgery is very easy and you won't be uncomfortable at all. The day of the surgery I was still feeling pretty good because I was on pretty good painkillers.
The following day I actually experienced the discomfort. It is not horrible, just tender and a bit painful when you want to get up and down. It was also pretty bad when I laughed, which for some reason because I was trying not to, was finding everything funny!
I found that keeping an icepack on it, and applying a bit of pressure to the incision site when I wanted to get up or down helped.
My husband was only home for 3 days so I was alone after that. Some days were difficult but I think since you have your son, he will be a big help. He can grab a diaper for you and get things you might need that are out of reach. This should really be helpful!!
It is harder when you have the C-section, but hang in there it will get easier!!
I have talked to other women who have had C-sections and everyones experiences are different!
Good luck to you anf congratulations!!

Wow, a lot of these posts sound much worse than my experiences. I have had two c-secions, the first unplanned and the second planned. Although it wasn't a pleasant experience, it wasn't nearly as bad as some of the previous posters experiences. The surgery itself is completely painless. They will give you a spinal block whick is a shot in the spine. This didn't hurt but was a little uncomfortable. You will start to feel numb from the chest down pretty quickly. You won't even be able to move your legs until the anestesia wears off. There will be a drape across your chest so that you can't see what they are doing(not that you would really want to.) Once this is done, your husband will be sitting right by your head to talk to you and the anestesiologist will be there the entire time too. At some point they will put a catheter in (they will take this out (painlessly) as soon as you are able to get up to go to the bathroom.) The doctors will tell you when they are beginning and will explain things as they go along if you want them to. They will tell you when they are getting ready to take the baby out. You will feel a pulling or tugging sensation, but not really pain. My husband was allowed to take pictures of this. There will be someone there ready to take care of the baby (there was a pediatrician there for mine). They will clean him up a little there and give him a initial check-up. If he is ok, they will wrap him up and show him to you. The hardest part for me was not being able to hold him then. Dad and the baby will go to the nursery where they will weigh the baby and give him a bath. The doctors will finish what they need to do and stitch/staple you up. The whole thing from the time they start until they take you to recovery last about 30 mins. They will take you to a recovery area and check your blood pressure and that the anestsia is wearing off. I didn't have the shaking that someone else mentioned. They only side effect that I had from the anestesia was an itching sensaion. Which I later found out is very commom. After a while they will take you to your room where your husband can bring the baby. As soon as my husband handed him to me he was sucking his hands, so I nursed him then. Everything was fine in that department. After a while they will ask you if you want to try and get up. You will be scared, but try it with thier help. You will be sore and they will walk you to the bathroom. They will help you change your pad and take out the catheter. They will walk you back to the bed. You will be on a liquid diet for about 1 day. They want to make sure everything is working as it should. They will ask you if you are passing gas (nice, I know.) After that you can eat what you want. My husband stayed the first two nights in the hospital with me. The baby was in the room with me the entire time. Each day you will feel a little stronger. I would push my baby up and down the hall in the wheeled bassinet just so I could get some movement. I agree that you should stay in the hospital as long as you can.
Walking will be painful for a while, but be sure to move around some, otherwise it will be worse. Just do little things at home. You won't be doing the laundry for a while (oh, darn.) If you can get someone to help you a little when your husband is gone, I would suggest it. Since I knew what to expect for the second one, my husband and I prepared many meals and then froze them before the baby came. This was the best thing that we have ever done. If you have the time you might want to consider doing this. THere were MANY nights that we were glad that those meals were there.
There will be days when you feel like you will never be back to normal again, but you will.
Sorry this is so long, but I think that when you know what to expect, you feel a little more prepared. I was still scared and cried right before the second one.
There is a great book called the Essential C-Section Guide, by Maureen Connelly. It describes everything to you. Your library will probably have it (although I think I just rewrote it here for you.) Also, our hospital had a class for parents that were going to birth there. They will show you the operating room before hand and explain everything to you as well.
Hope this helps and good luck.

C.

I had an emergency c-section with my baby just 3 weeks ago. He was 33 weeks and just the cervidil was making his heart rate drop, so into the OR we went!

I had to make myself get up the first day, but I wanted to see him, and he has to stay in the special care nursery, so I had to go to him. It was a struggle, mostly because of the pain medication (which I stopped taking 1/2 way through the first day because I couldn't get up to see my baby when I was so groggy!).

My advice is to sit up and move around as much as your body will let you. I hardly spent anytime laying around after the c-section and I honestly think that is the reason I healed as quickly as I did. Also, keep LOTS of pillows at hand all the time. You'll need the support when you're sitting or laying. Laying flat or leaning back hurt a lot... especially when I had to get back up again.

Overall it really wasn't as bad as I imagined it would be. I never needed more than Motrin after the morphine was taken away. And I really don't have a super high tolerance for pain.

Good luck!!

Hi J.,
I am a first time mother of a now 7 week old girl and I had to have a c-section because the baby was breech. I even had the doctor try and turn her to no avail. Needless to say I was pretty upset that I was going to have to have a c-section and not deliver her naturally. Like you I was very scared, escpecially after watching the movie that they show you at those delivery classes. All in all the surgery went very smoothly and the whole experience was alot better than I had anticipated. I spent the whole 4 days in the hospital (which my insurance paid for) and I was alittle sore but they pump you up with alot of pain meds that it wasnt so bad. Your up moving around quickly and by the time I went home I was already off my meds after a week. I was allowed to go up and down stairs right away and was allowed to pick up things no heavier than the baby. I know everyone heals differently but for me the recovery was really easy and hopefully it will be for you too. Good Luck!!!
C.

J.... it sounds like you have a lot on your plate right now. Don't worry. C-sections aren't as bad as people make them out to be. Especially when you have a planned c-section everything runs very smoothly and the day of your delivery you will have no pain. While you are in the hospital, try to take your pain medicine as scheduled because once your pain starts to build it is very hard to get it back down again. You can pretty much do everything in two weeks. I would consider hiring a doula or a nanny to help with taking care of the children and light housework for at least two weeks. Good luck!!!
K. H.
PS as soon as they take the baby out they can sedate you so that you won't be as nervous.

Hi J.,
Don't stress yourself out about it.
I've had 4 yes 4 c-sections and none of them were bad.
Actually I had 1 normal birth and as i said 4 c-sections and I would take 100 c-sections over a normal delivery anytime.
The recovery time is much shorter and less painful.
The 1st week will be a little difficult but after that it should be fine.
If you have any questions please feel free to e-mail me.

J.

I had 2 c-sections. The first one by far was the hardest but I also had just went through 27 hours of labor. The first 2-3 days are pretty tough but after that you will be surprised how quickly you feel better. The hardest part was getting up but with 2 little ones I really had no choice. It really is not that bad, I actually elected to have a c-section with my daughter. I hope this helps, you will be fine. L.

J.,
I had an emergency c-section with my first and so I guess Im glad I didn't have time to think about it beforehand. Here are my insights- typically you will be in the hospital for about 3 days after the surgery. It is a hard recovery, but the staff at the hospital will really help out. Does your husband only get a week total? If so, I would suggest him working maybe that 2nd or 3rd day you are in the hospital b/c you will have help there. He should have as many days as possible for when you come home. After you get home it will be a full week before you are able to move around easily. You will also be on pain meds (probably Vicodin) those first few days. It is soooo important that you do not try to do alot because you can really do damage to the incision if you are not healed properly. After I came home, I wasn't even able to reach over and get the baby at night because of the discomfort. My husband would have to position her for me to nurse and then put her back afterwards. Also, the thing that took me the most by surprise is the pain you may experience from gas bubbles. Since it is major abdominal surgery and you are being opened, there is a possibility of expereincing gas afterwards. This can be felt in the abdomen and even the neck and shoulders. It is not hugely painful, just uncomfortable. I guess I was unaware that this could happen which is why if you are prepared for the possibility, it isn't as bad if it happens.
The good news: after one week at home I drove myself to my first Dr. appt and even visited my work with my baby. So you shouldn't be afraid. Just plan to have someone available for the week after you go home. Also, it sounds like your active 4 year old may be more help than you think! He sounds like the perfect person to help grab diapers, blankets, etc. He will really feel like he is helping out!

J.:
Reading your request for info brought alot more questions to my mind. The heart problem your baby has, is this life threatening? You said it was the same as your older child, this child went thru labor and a vaginal delivery ok? Are you planning on more children in the future?
You need to know that nowdays it is pretty much the standard that "once a c-section always a c-section". It is very difficult to find a doctor to allow you to have a vaginal birth after a cesarean. The insurance companies demand that a woman doing a trial of labor after a cesarean must have a "surgeon" on the floor the whole time she labors just in case another section becomes necessary. Very few surgeons want to hang around waiting on a woman's labor - so most doctors just won't do VBACs. So preventing a cesarean section is "very" important. If I were in your place, depending on your baby's health situation, I would definitly choose a trial of labor to see how your baby handles labor and hopefully have a vaginal delivery. I would not agree to an induction either, because that puts more strain on your body and your baby.
Let's be honest - a cesarean section is more convenient for your doctor - not you.
I have had 2 c-sections then a VBAC. Coming home to an active preschooler, trying to take care of a newborn and trying to recover from major abdominal surgery is probably "the most" difficult thing I have ever had to do. I too, did not have the help of a mom or mother in law because they worked full time. What you have been told about the first 3 weeks not being able to "do" much of anything is true. You will not have hardly any energy or strength. Then it will take another 3 to 4 weeks to regain your strength and feel "human" again.
The c-section itself is not too bad. You can pick your day, set up child care, plan time off work etc....With an epidural you can be awake, have your husband with you, take some pix in the OR once the baby is born etc. The after surgery pain control is great and you'll probably go home on day 3 or 4. On day 5 you'll have to travel back to the dr's office to get your staples out. You can't drive or vacuum or go up and down stairs for at least 3 weeks. You'll not want to use your abdominal muscles at all until everything inside heals and isn't so sore.
Don't be bullied into doing something that is more convenient for your doctors. You need to think about both your health and your baby's. If a section does become necessary for your baby's life, then make sure your husband hires some help for you for a month after the baby's birth. You cannot be expected to go thru all of this without physical help. Wish you all the best. Good luck.
K.