Neighbors Driving Badly!

Updated on April 13, 2010
A.D. asks from Cibolo, TX
35 answers

We live in a cul de sac, there are 9 houses. 5 of these houses including ours have children all the time, 2 have children that come for visitation and are only there part of the time, and 1 is a grandmother whose grandchildren spend a pretty good amount of time playing at her house. Only 2 homes have no children... One set of these neighbors are not very "neighborly" they don't wave or say hi, no big deal, we don't need to be friends. The problem is, they drive in an unsafe way around the kids. In the evening, most of us are outside with our children while they play in the cul de sac (specifically why we bought the house in the cul de sac), as this man and woman come home from their respective jobs in the evening, they zoom around the corner with what seems to be little regard for all of the children who may be playing. Yesterday evening was the worst I have seen. My 5 year old kicked his ball in the street at the same time the man was turning the corner. We have all taught the kids to be very watchful of cars so he didn't run after it immediately. The man did stop for the ball so as to not run over it, but as my son stepped off the curb to retrieve the ball, the man gunned it and zoomed around. Most people would have let the child go get the ball and make it safely back to the curb. His wife, although without incident such as this, is also not overly careful (coming around the corner full speed, starring only straight ahead, etc) I am wondering if I would say anything to these people about there bad habits and lack of consideration, or just let it go and try to keep the kids out of the street as much as possible??? What would you mom's do?! Thank you!

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So What Happened?

First, I am going to say thank you to all of those who have offered friendly advice. Next I am going to express my unhappy feelings of being attacked by all of you mothers who are supposed to be so loving of children who automatically assumed that all of the neighborhood children including mine are having a free for all in the street! As I stated in my original posting, my son accidentally kicked his ball in the street, we have taught them to be very cautious of moving vehicles and he "stepped off the curb," should have been clues to all that they don't just run wild in the streets. That being said, all of the children on this little block play in the cul de sac from time to time. They have bike races, play baseball, etc... All under the very watchful eyes of their parents who NEVER leave them unattended. This is a relatively new neighborhood, we all moved in just about a year and a half ago, most everyone on the block chose the cul de sac so it would be safer for the children to play with less through traffic. Children do even get run over in driveways and sidewalks, and even when cars occasionally run through walls. Most everyone seemed very quick to pass judgment here. I plan on writing a little note to our neighbors, as we already have the "slow, children at play signs" on the corners, and we shall see how it goes.

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L.L.

answers from Houston on

In my cul-de-sac we have the same issue. the parents who have chldren out playing in the street or in the front yards put out those little 3 foot plastic green Safety men that hold a orange flag. that you can get from STEP-2 company. They put out one or 2 of those a couple house before where the kids are, they leave enough room to get through, but close enough together to make drives slow down and think where they are. Hope this helps. Those little green men are not expensive maybe $29, so for less than $70 you can prevent a serious accident.

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N.H.

answers from Houston on

I would buy some big orange cones and block off the section of the cul-de-sac that the kids are playing in. Leave enough room for the people to get to their drive, and tell the children not to go outside the cones.

Usually when people see cones, they tend to slow down. Its also a good warning and reminder that kids are nearby.

If you get any arguments about the cones, I would threaten to petition for road humps.

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H.B.

answers from Corpus Christi on

I would definitely say something before the unspeakable happens. Maybe get together with the other neighbors with children & create a united front, so to speak. Don't march up to their door with attitude (although that would be what I would WANT to do!) & try to be as soft as possible about it, but definitely say something! Good luck!

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T.S.

answers from Killeen on

Like others have said, the street is not a playground. There are cities that do not allow you to put a basketball goal in the street or on a curb facing the street for this reason.
I personally would not let my child play in the street cul-de-sac or otherwise, as you never know who is going to drive up (Sunday drivers, someone lost, or just a kid cruising). As for the recent incident, maybe your household rule could change to if there is a car coming wait until it has passed b4 going to get the ball. When it comes down to it it's YOUR child. If someone were to hit your child there might be a penalty put on them but that won't help your child if he/she is hurt.

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R.

answers from San Antonio on

Do you belong to an HOA? Our HOA is great about this kind of thing. You can call and make a complaint and they will send an official letter to the neighbor telling them they need to stop. In our neighborhood, several people put a sign in the street that says "caution". The sign is available at Toys R us and it looks like a little bright yellow man holding a flag. Hope this is helpful.

1 mom found this helpful

M.O.

answers from Cleveland on

I can see both sides of the story. First of all, you want a safe place for your kids to play ball and so on. On the other hand, when did the street become a playground?

Twice in my neighborhood over the past month I have had to spend money because kids are playing in the street. The first time I was driving the minivan, slowed for some kids who were playing baseball in the streets and had my window broken by a line drive. Three weeks later I was riding my motorcycle and some kids had moved their basketball hoop out the edge of the driveway and were using the street as the court. Because of the way the cars were parked, if you were around the basket, you couldn't see me coming. Because of the music they had blasting and their yelling, you couldn't hear me. (I have a fairly quit bike) Five of the kids moved out of the way...the sixth was under the basket. He turned and threw the basketball just as I passed and hit me in the head, nearly knocking me off the bike. I managed to save it, and not laying it down, but because of the way I saved it, I sprained my ankle.

Now, when it comes to pedestrians verus cars on the road, who has the right of way? Well, Texas law says:

§ 552.003. PEDESTRIAN RIGHT-OF-WAY AT CROSSWALK. (a) The
operator of a vehicle shall yield the right-of-way to a pedestrian
crossing a roadway in a crosswalk if:
(1) no traffic control signal is in place or in operation; and
(2) the pedestrian is:
(A) on the half of the roadway in which the vehicle is traveling; or
(B) approaching so closely from the opposite half of the roadway as to be in danger.
(b) Notwithstanding Subsection (a), a pedestrian may not suddenly leave a curb or other place of safety and proceed into a crosswalk in the path of a vehicle so close that it is impossible for the vehicle operator to yield.
(c) The operator of a vehicle approaching from the rear of a vehicle that is stopped at a crosswalk to permit a pedestrian to cross a roadway may not pass the stopped vehicle.
§ 552.005. CROSSING AT POINT OTHER THAN CROSSWALK. (a) A
pedestrian shall yield the right-of-way to a vehicle on the highway
if crossing a roadway at a place:
(1) other than in a marked crosswalk or in an unmarked
crosswalk at an intersection; or
(2) where a pedestrian tunnel or overhead pedestrian
crossing has been provided.
(b) Between adjacent intersections at which traffic control
signals are in operation, a pedestrian may cross only in a marked
crosswalk.
(c) A pedestrian may cross a roadway intersection
diagonally only if and in the manner authorized by a traffic control device.
(There's more here, which supports you, and also supports them: http://law.onecle.com/texas/transportation/chapter552.html)

So what do I think? You're both wrong. Don't let your kids play in the road, and if you do, be prepared for those who are frustrated that you let them play there, instead of in the backyard. And yes, I think you should write them a little note. Just explain why you, and your children, enjoy playing out there and ask that they not come barrelling through there. Tell them in return, you'll be more courteous when you see them coming and move immediately, and if you hear them coming, you'll make sure the children hold their balls, etc so as not to have it come into the road in front of them.

1 mom found this helpful

K.N.

answers from Austin on

Invest in some large orange traffic cones (maybe your neighbors will chip in to buy them?), stick reflective tape on if necessary (so visible during twilight and early evening). Set the cones up along the front of the cul-de-sac, so that a car has to slow down and drive between the cones to get to a house or drive way. That way, you are not targeting any one neighbor but all cars that drive into the area. There are also some reflective plastic child signs that you can put on the sidewalk before the cones, so that there is ample time to alert a driver to the upcoming playzone (and cones).

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K.C.

answers from Houston on

I would say something along the line of watch out for the kids let them know if they start gunning to act like their going to run over any kid your going to start calling the police. If needed try to get a speed bump infront of the culdesac. Also if you live in a deed restricted area you can fight to have them move get a potision. call the police and have them scan radar down your street to get them tickets.
Safety of the children come first.

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M.C.

answers from Odessa on

I would call the local police office and let them know what is happening. Maybe you could get a sign put up in your neighborhood with the slow children playing sign.

I also would talk to your neighbors, see if they feel the same way and when you call your Police Department, maybe they will send an officer out to "police" your street. If they are speeding around in a neighborhood, then they are probably speeding other places as well. A united front is always best and it would be better coming from multiple people rather than one family.

Just my opinion, my first reaction of course would not be the best one, as I would probably confront them myself, but I have a bit of temper when it comes to children being put in harm's way.

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L.G.

answers from Houston on

Talk to them and/or write a nice note. You are not friends with them so you have nothing to lose.

We've got a mom with little kids who is lead foot when driving to school to pick up her kids. It kills me, she even blew through a stop sign in front of the crossing guard as I was almost about to cross the street with a 1 yr. old in a stroller!! When school starts up again and if she continues, I plan on speaking with the police and seeing if someone can come and sit with their radar gun for one week and talk with the offenders.

The speed limit is 25 MPH, that's the law not a courtesy!

If you know the exact times these people come and go, talk with police and see if they can come at that time and witness. Who cares if they get mad, its better than waiting until something terrible happens.

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S.M.

answers from San Antonio on

The way I see it, there are two sides to this story! you have the side with the kids, where you want them to be able to play in the street, and you have the side where the adults w/o kids feel that the street is not a playground! Do you have a homeowners association? they could help in showing and enforcing the by laws. I live in a small sub-division (40 homes) and there are a few that let their kids play/skateboard in the street, near the entrance to the sub-div. while I am sure that nobody wants to hurt these kids, we also don't think that they should be playing/skateboarding in the street. I think if you got the rest of your neighbors behind you and drew up a very polight letter of your concerns for the children, and all signed it, maybe this one house would try to be more careful. Be ready for them to possibly, let you know that they don't appreciate that the kids are in the street. Athough the pedestrian has the right of way on city streets, the street is not a playground! So this could be argued either way, your kids are not safe on the street but you let them play there anyway, that could be argued too! Why can't the kids play in the backyard or even on the front lawn? or at a near by park? The truth is that you with your kids in the street are breaking a safety code, The people driving too fast are within their rights if they are within the speed limit, but the day that one of those kids gets hurt, no ones lives will ever be the same! And how can you be sure that even if you do get through to these people and they are much more careful, does that mean that somebody else will never drive into your cul-de-sac too fast? a stranger, or a visitor, or someone lost just trying to turn around?? I would say that it is in your best interest to keep your own kids safe by keeping them off the streets! Good luck.

A.G.

answers from Houston on

All cars should be weary of children in neighborhoods, especially in cul-de-sacs where they are known to play less carefully. You should definitely talk to your neighbors, they might not realize how it looks since they don't have any kids and are ignorant of what is required around children. But even if they don't like what you have to say they will still most likely be more careful, better safe than popular

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J.W.

answers from Houston on

A knee jerk reaction would be to give these people a piece of one's mind but I would hold back completely.
If they have no regard for a child's safety, I doubt they are going to listen to anything you have to say.
They obviously do not approve of the children playing in the cul-de-sac and making it so obvious they don't even care if someone gets hurt in the process.
I would avoid them at all costs and not stir up what could result in a hornet's nest as my gut feeling is that they would be uncooperative.
Just keep the children in their own gardens at all costs - it's better than having a tragedy on your hands.

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H.B.

answers from Odessa on

It depends on how well you do with confrontation. If you have no problem with it, I would go to their house and ask for a "favor" since you have a current incident to reflect on and try not to sound accusatory. However, if you aren't good with confrontation, then I would go buy some of those little cones and/or netting that are bright yellow/orange and say "Drive Safely Children Playing". When did it become their right to make the neighbors children stay in their own yard?
Good luck!

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H.P.

answers from Houston on

How irritating...and dangerous. Were they there before you, before all the children came along? There could be some resentment that children have taken over. I can tell you that I have avoided living in apartment complexes where there are children playing outside. I love them all, but I can't stand to have to drive around them at home! When we were looking for our house, I wanted a family environment but not streets full of children playing. We, also, live in a cul-de-sac full of children, but our garage is around the corner, so I have the best of that--I get to pull into my garage with reckless abandon (not really) and watch the children play from my front door. I wouldn't want to have to watch for all the little ones. Your neighbors might be overly aggressive or defiant, as they don't know how to communicate to you in a "nice" way that they don't like this invasion. After all, the cul-de-sac is NOT an extension of your yard. It is part of the public street. Maybe they moved to a cul-de-sac in search of a quiet space off the beaten path. Each of you had a vision for your homestead when you moved in, and no one's is more important than another.

Maybe if you throw a block party that has equal fun for adults, you can lure them in and find out something about them. Or just go and introduce yourself. They'd be less likely to speed by if they've made personal contact.

Also, people who don't have small children tend not to have the tolerance or patience for what comes with small children.

Maybe you could have your neighborhood association send out a note to drive more carefully while children are out playing.

Those are a few thoughts, all kinda jumbled together.

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U.

answers from San Antonio on

ick. I would leave a note on their door asking them to be more cautious, siting specifics about their driving behaviour and signing it, "your neighbors." Make it polite and hopefullly they will change their behaviour. It is possible that they are simply unaware since they do not have children of their own..

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K.B.

answers from Houston on

Hi A.-

In my neighborhood we have this little "fight" every spring when school lets out. One neighbor with kids will send an email to the neighborhood politely reminding them that school is out and asking that everyone drive slowly and carefully because kids are out playing. Then a neighbor without children will respond that he is happy to drive carefully but asks that parents remind their children that the street is not a playground and that they should be aware of cars and move out of the way when they see one. I tell you this because I happen to agree with both sides. I don't think children should be playing in the street. Even if you made every neighbor drive slow as can be and they were as watchful as they can be there are delivery trucks and visitors coming through your neighborhood who are not familiar with your area that may not be as careful. When children are made to feel comfortable playing in the street they lose sight of the fact that they are indeed in the middle of the street and they simply expect every driver to watch out for them rather than them playing safely elsewhere.

With that in mind your neighbors have a responsibility to drive carefully too. Even if you teach your kids to not go into the street no matter what, kids are kids, and they will chase the occasional ball or forget what they are doing and run into the street.

My suggestion is to talk to your neighbor but go into it with a give and take attitude. Ask them to do their part by slowing down and watching carefully for children and you do your part by teaching your kids to play in the yard or driveway to be safe.

Good Luck,
K.

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P.Y.

answers from Houston on

WOW!!! that is not very safe or neighborly...anyway...
I would suggest that all of the parents in the culdesac speak with the drivers. However, I would not suggest that everyone goes over at once, but each of you need to talk to them. A child is going to get hurt with that type of unsafe and reckless driving.

Good luck and keep the kids safe.

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M.K.

answers from McAllen on

Hi there. I lived in a neighbourhood with a culdesac too. A few years ago. We had on neignbour who did not care for the saftey of our kids. Every time we has an incident we he drove to fast. we called the police. He got tired of that and started to pay attention. There are speed limits they have to follow.
Hope I helped.
PS: I did not just call it was a couple of neighbours.

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L.H.

answers from Killeen on

Hi A.,
I'd call the law enforcement ,,there is a speed law for culdasac's and see what you need to do to get a speed sign and a children at play sign up they will or should help you or tell you who will good luck
L.

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G.W.

answers from Beaumont on

I would get the neighbors license plate number and report it to the police and pass around a petion and give it to the police saying that this neighbor drives reckless . Also the other thing u can do is build a fence around the front yard and make ur kids stay in it. Sounds like ur neighbor is a bit self -centered . I hope I helped ! G.

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G.W.

answers from San Antonio on

I have had the same problem. I just started putting my "Kids at Play" sign right in the way of the cars. This way you can make them slow down. If you have to play "Hard Ball" do it! You can replace the sign but not your child!
Blessings!

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B.B.

answers from Houston on

Ask your county for a sign that says "children at play". They need a warning. What about the backyard? You could take turns at each others houses. The children would have a new experience each time. Also, they would be safe. Safety is key. Kids are too valuable and can't be replaced.

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J.T.

answers from Victoria on

You need to contact the police. I would not say anything at all to these people. Its dangerous. What if one of the kids had a friend over and they werent aware of the rules or the crazy drivers. You need to call the police every time this happens and ask them to put a stop sign up before the turn. Tell them what you have written here. This will take care of the problem. If there is already a stop sign, if they are running it you can request a patroll car to watch the sign and ticket those that pause at the sign. Good luck and be safe.

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R.L.

answers from Houston on

I think it's a little rude for everyone to assume you are allowing your children to play in the street when no where in your question did you indicate that they do so. From what I read the children are playing outside, I am assuming in the yards, and occassionally a ball or toy amy go into the street. Your neighbors should be driving cautiously because when kids are playing outside this is bound to happen and the kids should be able to retrieve their toys safely.

Also I don't see the harm in allowing them to play supervised in the cul de sac, after all it's a dead end street in a family neighborhood.

I would definitely suggest to speak with your neighbors that have children, and if you have a home owners association you should all make a complaint. I would suggest to ask them if they can generate a letter asking people to keep in mind there are children in the neighborhood and requesting that people drive courtesly and caustiously and at the same time remind all parents to teach their kids about outdoor safety and playing in a safe manner. I'm sure that some parents already do this, and most kids know not to play in the street but some may not.

If you do not have a homeowners association, maybe you and your neighbors can get together and draft your own polite letter. If this doesn't work, file a complaint with your local police station about the unsafe driving and speeding.

It sounds like those people do not appreciate children, what I'm wondering is why they are in a family oriented neighborhood in the first place?

I hope it works out for you!

R.

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M.H.

answers from Houston on

I would confront them and explain to them that just because they do not have children doesn't mean that they have to drive the way they do and to be more mindful of the children that do play there. If that doesn't work then call the police and tell them to monitor the street closer. Maybe if they were to receive a ticket for their driving they may think twice about it later.

When people drive like that on my street, and I'm outside with my daughter, I will physically go out into the street and yell at the driver to slow down.

M.

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J.B.

answers from San Diego on

Children belong at the PARK!!! Cars belong in streets!!! I bought a car to drive on the street that happens to be on a cal de sac why must I be forced to navigate around careless kids with parents too lazy to take them to the park where they belong. While it is reasonble to expect that drivers show caution and concern, the attitude of parents such as yourself that think you have a RIGHT to literally take over the street (which, again, is intended for motor vehicles) and use it for your own convenience is ridiculous and could in some cities violate traffic obstruction laws not to mention placing your children in a potentially harmful situation. Have you also thought of the potential risk you place your children in by teaching them that it is "ok" to play in the street??? What happens when they are at a friends house that might be located on a more busy street?? Parents, you have to be smarter and more aware!!! Wake up and and get your kids out of the street--they do NOT belong there regardless of where your home is located!!!!

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L.B.

answers from Corpus Christi on

Most people now have cameras use it keep a diary, and if it continues let the police know what is going on. If there is a problem later on they will have these notes. If necessary let these people know what is going on and why. Let them know that they are being filmed when they do this and it will be going to the police if it continues. Your child's life is important.

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E.E.

answers from Waco on

I do agree that it sounds as though your neighbors are not being very considerate and there is no excuse for driving recklessly. I would, as diplomatically as possible, try to talk to them about your concerns. I do not, however, advocate letting children play in or near the street. You hear about too many bad accidents happening and for me, personally, it's just not worth the risk of having my child injured or killed. We have some neighbors who are constantly letting their children play in the front yard and the kids ages 3-8 have absolutely no regard for cars that may be coming down the street. The parents are not paying attention to what they are doing and if a ball gets kicked into the street, the kids ALWAYS go running after it and I am not sure I have ever seen them look before they run out into the street. This is unsafe. Even the most well-intentioned parents can work with their kids and try to get children to look both ways, but they're kids... they are going to forget. In my personal opinion, we are the adults in the situation and it's our job as parents to keep our kids safe. That is why I personally won't allow my kids to play in the street or near the street. Streets, roads, and highways were made for cars, not kids.

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K.H.

answers from Killeen on

Well, first and foremost I would say, Talk to your neighbors in a kind and concerning matter. After all we must love our neighbors as we love ourselves...but...we do love our children more.
If this does not work, in combination, get some orange cones, and sandwich boards that say "slow children at play" they are sold at toys are us.
If this still does not work call law enforcement EVERY time they come in to fast. There is a term in law enforcement called" too fast for conditions" mostly that is for weather related incidents but can also transcend to children playing.
I too live on a cul-de-sac. and I put the cones across the road and let the kids play to their hearts content, they are never out there unattended as I am always out with them. and I "get on" my nasty neighbors that try to drive over the cones. Since I live on post there are supposed to be kids in all the houses but we have a soldier that lives there with 2 other single soldiers as he lied to get housing. But that's a different tale.
All in all the kids come first. I have gone as far as sitting at the end of my driveway with a hose and spray cars that don't or won't slow down...LOL. OOOPPS I was just watering and the hose got away from me.
So good luck and I hope your neighbors are better than mine and change their bad ways.

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M.H.

answers from Houston on

Have you thought about forming a neighbor social group? Have a meeting each month and discuss problems that you have in your neighborhood making this is the first one discussed. Make sure these 'speeders' are present at the meeting when it is being discussed. You could make this like a block party with a potluck dinner. Since you all live close, you could get permission to block off your street for a short period of time while you have the meeting/party so that no outsider would show up in a vehicle and disturb the outing. If discussing the problem does not solve it, then go the police route or select someone to talk to the 'speeders' about their reckless driving.

Marie

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C.P.

answers from Houston on

If you are in a cul-de-sac with a Homeowners Assoc., ask about having a sign placed at the corner--SLOW Children At Play, if not, talk to some one at City Hall about having a sign placed and/or have a speed limit (5 mile or 10 mile) sign placed.
I did this when my children were young, because my block was out of line with the rest of the blocks, and cars would turn down the street, get mad, drive full speed, only to have to stop and zig zag to get onto the rest of the street blocks.
Since this was done, the school district's high school and middle schools, have been built in the same block, but two streets north. The school buses leave the schools, cross the main street, turn onto our street to go to the next school. Turning onto the main street is too sharp of a turn for the buses, so they use the residental street to make the 'u-turn'. I was unaware of this until I was home during the school day and heard the buses 'whishing' down the street in the morning and afternoon. Though most of the children are in school, there are still some stay at home moms with pre-schoolers on the street. When I mentioned this to my husband, I found out that he had called the school district on several occasions to report that the buses were driving down the street too fast.

The first part was my response from the other day.
Ironically I was reading in the paper about a similiar situation with speeding on residential streets.
A solution that was mentioned that may be the perfect solution for your situation, is to get a Speed Bump placed across the entrance to your street, then ALL entering will have to slow down.
Hope this helps

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L.B.

answers from Killeen on

Hi A., just my opinion...but I might not write a letter but instead take time to go and talk to the neighbor in a very kind way just letting her know your concerns. Sometimes when we write a letter, whether it's a written letter or an e-mail, it can come across not how you meant it to at all. We tend to read between the lines. Also, make sure you go alone, without the other neighbors, because you do not want it to seem like you are all ganging up on her/him. Maybe express your concern, stating what you will do on your end to help the situation and ask that they try to do their part as well, so that everyone can have a safe and enjoyable neighborhood. Just my thoughts....I was a public school teacher before I became a Mommy, so I am used to 'putting out fires' for lack of a better word...while keeping both sides in mind.

I get irritated with crazy drivers, also, and I believe they should have more common courtesy to the children. But, the fact is, sometimes we can't control what others do, but just try to keep our children as safe as we can when they are with us.

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J.H.

answers from Houston on

These people obviously do not have children. You didn't mention their ages, so they're probably young. Since you aren't friends with them anyway, just neighbors, go and have a talk with them about it. If you don't get anywhere, your subdivision probably has a civic club or homeowners association. Go there and request a lower speed limit sign placed nearby. Just be prepared for a lecture on letting your children play in the street.

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V.C.

answers from San Antonio on

I have the same problem on my street. I usually yell at the cars SLOW DOWN as I am holding my child.
but since you live close to these people that would probably cause problems. I would notify your home owners association or call the police information and ask them what you should do. Some police will come by and sit in your area for a awhile. i know of a man who made signs and placed them in is yard where people can see them. I hope these things work.

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