My 6 year old son just started having night terrors. His dad and I are devorced and we tried to be together again this january. My oldest started doing better with school and he was more happier. We tried so hard to get a long but we couldn't we started fighting evey time we were around each other. That was not good for the kids eather. So we split up again, the first week of july the kids live with me and every weekend their dad has them. I moved in with my parents and he keep the apartment that we had. Last weekend their dad had a date over at his house. So he took all the pictures of our family down. When he got the kids this last weekend my oldest got mad because there was no pictures of me up and he has been in a mood since. The first night that he came back from his dads he started having the night terrors. He was crying and screaming for me like I wasn't there. I tried talking to him and holding him nothing helped after 45 mins he woke up, I think, and seen that I was holding him and then he went back to sleep and slept good the rest of the night. He started to do it again last night but it was not as bad. He has never been left with out knowing where I was and when I would be back. I don't know why he is doing this. any help at this point would be good
Doesn't sound like dad handled the situation very well. You need to explain to your son why the pics are down, much like you explained why you and daddy were'nt going to live together ... it will be a job to get him to accept all these changes. Try to keep your patience and answer ANY questions he may have. Good luck to you L..
V.
Hi there,
Have you ever heard of using flower essences for your children? These are homeopathic-type remedies that can be very helpful in easing emotional ups & downs & also traumas. They are inexpensive, do not have side effects, & very safe for children. It would probably be very helpful to ease night terrors, as well as being a preventative before both your kids go to sleep. You might use some yourself, as you go through the divorce process, and look up Walnut flower essence as this helps with big changes and adjusting to new situations. Walnut also helps protect a person from other peoples' influences, so would be helpful for the kids as they adjust to their new parenting situation.
Flower essences are NOT essential oils or herbs; they have no odor and work on a very subtle, vibrational level.
The one I would recommend you look up is Rescue Remedy, or Five-Flower Formula, specifically designed for shock or trauma. You can look up either Bach Flower Essences, or the Flower Essence Society & buy essences for yourself or your children on the site, or check at a Whole Foods Market or Co-op to buy them. They cost about $5-10 per bottle, depending on what size you get.
Hope this helps!
Can you get him into counseling either at scholl or outside of school? Divorce is very hard to deal with. I was 13 when my parents did and it was very hard for me even then.
First of all have you tried seeing a therapist with your ex?
Secondly you could get your sons a wallet and put a photo of you in it to comfort them when they visit Dad. Something from home with your smell on it may help as well.
Third of all there is a wonderful product called Rescue Remedy. It is a natural calming serum that is derived from flowers. You can get it in drop form or spray form. Both are great for calming night terrors. Good Luck!
My nephew has night terrors. My sister-in-law just sits with him and tries to get him back to a peaceful sleep. I think they most important thing is figuring out why they happen. You might want to take him to a counselor. Many insurance plans cover a family counseling. Check with your insurance co. Divorce is hard to process when you are an adult, let alone a six year old. Also, you might want to check with your ex and your other child to see if anything happened to him while he was there.
My oldest still has problems at times with the fact that me and his ad are not together. IT has been almost 8 years. HE toopk it hard in the beginning and would cry and scream in his sleep. I would go and gently rub his back to soothe him. It worked. HE stops his cries at night about 6 months after the split up. HAve you considered some couselng? I did. It helped him.
Dear L.,
The night terrors will go away, you are handling it the best way possible. Separating from Dad is hard for children, and then, not seeing your picture scared him. We do not realize how much our children depend upon us and our presence and how fearful they may be at different times of their lives - so your son has hit a hard spot, and with your love and care he will get through it and be stronger than ever. Don't harrange on Dad, it will be a useless use of your energy.
"They" said that my grandson would be a screwed up adult because of all the things that happened when he was a child. Not so. He is a warm caring loving wise and wonderful adult, who is very sensitive to the needs of his children. So there you are. Stay close and communicative and all will be well.
Sincerely, C. N.
