No Favors for My Daughter's 2 Yr Old Bday Party? Acceptable? Not?

Updated on October 20, 2010
A.J. asks from Berkeley, IL
24 answers

Hey there Mommies!

I need reassurance that this is ok. My husband and I, like many others, are EXTREMELY tight on cash flow. $10 makes a difference in our house.

For my daughter's 2nd birthday, I made coloring books and we are giving crayons to go along with the books. If I give these in a bag is this sufficent? I considered not giving any favors at all- is that tacky?

We are feeding everyone dinner and would like to give her a gift as well and there just isn't enough money to go around!!

Thanks for your opinions!!

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THANK YOU!!! Thank you all so much for sending such thoughtful responses.

Featured Answers

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C.M.

answers from Austin on

First I would like to say YAY for no more gift bags! It's generally junk from the dollar store and would get thrown away. I hate them. I don't do them.
Second- It is really funny how many people are now coming out and saying that they don't like gift bags. Just a couple of months ago this question came up and I was called NAMES for saying that gift bags are junk. One mom even suggested that I was stealing the joy out of the children's lives. Don't get me wrong, I am super happy that people are stopping this kind of thing, I just think that it's a big changeover. A big, wonderful changeover.

3 moms found this helpful
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J.A.

answers from Spartanburg on

I know you have a lot of responses, which I haven't read. I have a 4 and 2 and have NEVER given favors! Call me a bad mommy/hostess/whatever! It is totally okay and I've never heard a complaint or had a guest not come the next yr...which I would think they would do if they were offended! I went to many a party as a kid (I'll be 30 this yr) and no one ever gave favors or goody bags. Honestly, when my kids get them at other parties, the candy is eaten at the party and the cheap little toys are often lost, broken, or thrown away before the day is over! But maybe I am tacky :)

3 moms found this helpful
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K.A.

answers from Grand Junction on

More than sufficient. Often times I wonder why we give party favors anyway. Do we do it because that is what every one does or because we want to? I know most of the time they end up lost or in the trash within a week anyway. I think they are a big waste of money, unless it is something they can hold on to for a long time and those are usually really expensive. I personally, don't give party favors unless it is pencils or crayons....something the kids will like, cherish and can use.

3 moms found this helpful

More Answers

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J.G.

answers from Madison on

I think we make a pact as Mom's - "NO more favors!!!"

6 moms found this helpful
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J.P.

answers from Boise on

Favors are not required, and rarely used. I find them a waste of money that just add more "stuff" to our already full lives. You buy cheap things to go in them to save money, and then most of the time they are thrown away anyway. I haven't given them before and don't plan to. I guess I will keep reading to find out if I am tacky! :)

3 moms found this helpful

K.L.

answers from Cleveland on

I hate the trend of giving out favors for birthday parties. All it does is set a precedence that kids always have to be given "stuff". I think it's good for kids to know that today it's not all about you, it's soandso's birthday, they get the gifts. I think that a coloring book and crayons in more than enough.
Oh, and happy birthday to your little ones!

2 moms found this helpful
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S.W.

answers from Pocatello on

Totally works! I think a little colouring book is fine or no gift bag at all, you are feeding them.
Have a Happy Birthday!

2 moms found this helpful
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M.L.

answers from Houston on

Many of the parties I go to forget to even give the favors out- I think it is fine.

2 moms found this helpful

K.M.

answers from Chicago on

Swag bags for kids! Swag bags are for celebs ... Most kids dont even do anything wth the favors but eat the candy/food out of them anyways ... no not needed.

1 mom found this helpful
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D.P.

answers from Seattle on

Great idea! If you are feeling like it isn't enough, toss a fruit roll-up into each bag, too. But I think your coloring books only will be perfect.

1 mom found this helpful
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P.G.

answers from Dallas on

Honestly, I don't get this thing about giving gifts to people when they come to your party. As a kid, we're there to celebrate the b-day person. I never expected a gift. Cake, icecream, whatever - yeah, that's expected (LOL). I think what you're doing is very nice.

1 mom found this helpful
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B.B.

answers from New York on

Yes, absolutely acceptable! I did a party bag for my sons 1st b-day, but didn't do anything for his 2nd. Mostly because by that time I had been to enough parties that either didn't give favors or gave stuff that, sadly to say, just ended up in the garbage! So, live and learn!

I personally wouldn't be offended at all by not getting a favor/party bag from a party! But that is just me. I'm sure there are some people who think it is a must have.

1 mom found this helpful
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S.B.

answers from Dallas on

Sounds like a great idea to me! Fortunately I think the trend is moving away from the goody bags stuffed with candy and trinkets....personally I sneak most of that junk into the garbage any way. Your gift sounds thoughtful to me!!

I am with Melissa K. on this one. We did a traditional at home party last year and we will do something similar again. I think people get a little carried away with some of these parties.

1 mom found this helpful
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A.P.

answers from Chicago on

You're good. Not tacky. I started doing the goody bags at the first few b-days...but it was such a pain in the neck, or I would forget to hand them out. So I quit doing them all together. Waste of $$. The coloring book and crayons is a great idea, and plenty!
Happy birthday!

1 mom found this helpful
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A.O.

answers from Sherman on

I have never understood why people break the bank for party favors. Forgo the party favors and don't feel bad about it!

1 mom found this helpful

C.F.

answers from Boston on

Perfect ! thoughtful and homemade! i would love my son to receive that instead of a bag of cheap junk he's not gonna play w/ or use and we toss after a week. I feel bad people think Waaayyy to much about a 'favor'.... i wouldnt think twice about not receiving one. I really do like what your doing :-) Have a Great Party !!!

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R.B.

answers from New York on

I think the coloring books sound like a nice idea. If you don't feel is is enough you could always bake some cookies for them as well.

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M.O.

answers from Chicago on

I don't think your idea is stupid. Especially since you're daughter is only 2. I'd assume many of the kids you're inviting our little, so as a parent, I wouldn't be giving my 2 yr old candy or those little plastic toys that usually come in treat bags anyway.

Just another idea too, I've read once that kids can understand/play with as many friends as they are old. Instead of inviting tons of kids and family to a birthday party, we've focused on making a GREAT experience for only 1 or 2 friends, and then just having a small, not all dec'd out, birthday celebration. Our kids have really loved the idea of going to a movie of their choice, getting popcorn and a drink and taking a friend or two along. They sit in a separate row and have a blast. For our 7 yr old's recent bday, I bought her the Ramona and Beezus book. I also bought one for her friend. (I called the friend's dad first to make sure this was ok.) Then we made an invitation over a month in advance, attached it to the book and invited her friend to read the book and come with us to the movies to celebrate our daughter's birthday.

Around us EVERYONE does bounce house place, bowling parties, etc. It's hard to find something original AND something that doesn't break the bank.

This was a wonderful option for our 7 yr old. Maybe these ideas will help you going forward to not get too caught up in what everyone else is doing.

Best wishes

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M.C.

answers from Washington DC on

coloring books and crayons are fine. when we go to family parties there are no goody bags.

M.D.

answers from Dallas on

I totally understand and you are doing things just fine. That's a neat idea about making the coloring books, so age appropriate too... I don't know how many birthdays for my kids I wish I could have done more, I live on a tight budget and most of the time it doesn't allow for a birthday that month so making it work to me is always a miracle...
Happy Birthday to your little girl!

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J.F.

answers from Philadelphia on

Totally acceptable!!! Why sweat your budget for token gifts that the kids will not even appreciate by time they get home? Half the parties I have been to, the host forgets to hand out bags to the first handful of people to leave...lots of work, money and for what?!?
The coloring books with crayons (as long as you can get them inexpensively) sound like a nice touch but don't feel obligated. She is only two and the more you start now the more that will be expected down the road.
Good luck!
- J. :)

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L.G.

answers from Dallas on

I did something like this for my son's 6th birthday and it was a hit! The kids got a Transformer's coloring/puzzle book, a Transformer's pencil and a Transformer's fruit chew tied together with string. Simple, easy and affordable. Plus they had something to do on the way home! I had a few leftover favors from no shows and I donated them to a local charity.
I have noticed that some parents are either leaning towards no party bag or something useful as a favor. I hate the candy bag!!

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L.R.

answers from Chicago on

I think the coloring books w/the crayons is just fine! Unlike the other moms, I am so about the favors/goody bags. I think it's a nice way to show appreciation for coming to the party and buying a gift. I even give the adults who come a nice little inexpensiv something, too.

S.S.

answers from Oklahoma City on

i've never given party favor's to the children that come to my daughter's birthday party. i'll pull out the games (if that) to help keep them entertained while waiting for everyone to show up before the party, then they just go play in her room or outside

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