I don't consider myself an office nazi by any means. In fact, I blow my nose obnoxiously loud. And I don't do it in private. For some reason I have this mental block that says if it's not loud, I'm not doing a good job. But anyway, there are some office offenses that just grate on my nerves like sandpaper. Others, not so much. We have a small office and everyone is pretty tolerant, so we have a great bunch.
There's one girl who has a chronic cough of some sort. It's a dry, wheezy cough. She's my age, so she doesn't have emphysema, and I know she's not a smoker and doesn't have asthma. We're good friends, actually, so I know she's not sick, and I've asked what the deal is, and she doesn't know. I want to scream, after the thirtieth coughing session today, "Will you get that checked?!?!"
There's a lady who loves stinky food. She microwaves fish often. Has burned fish on multiple occasions in the microwave *gag*. Her afternoon snack of choice is popcorn, which she has also burned on multiple occasions. Not only would I like to revoke her license to microwave, but I'd like to hold a class on why NOT to bring stinky lunches to work in a small office.
Then there's the loud walker. He's not overweight or heavy by any means, but he wears these cowboy boots and stomps around the office like he's on a step team. People have made comments and he just laughs, but it's way past annoying now. I'd like to leave an anonymous, slightly threatening letter on his desk.
And of course there's the guy with Crohn's disease (bless his heart) who follows a very strict diet. He's always eating all kinds of strange whole foods, but the problem is that he leaves his messes in the kitchen. Crumbs & juices of some sort or another all over the counter, seeds in the sink, etc. He dumps his french press out in the sink and just leaves the half-ground coffee beans. E-mails have been sent out to everyone so as not to single him out, but everyone knows it's him.
So what office offenders do you have in your work place? What kinds of things annoy you to no end at work?
@ 'Dad': In case you didn't get the tone of the post, it's meant to be light-hearted. :)
1. The lady that wears no makeup and wears sweatpants
2. The lady who eats salads with onions in them at lunch
3. The lady who multitasks working and doing personal activities like mamapedia etc
Oh I should tell you I work from home...those are all me...LOL
We have the old guy who hocks loogies. It reverberates throughout the tiled building. It's so foul. Sorry, but loud nose-blowers are probably a close second.
When I worked, I had two that annoyed me. The non-flusher (so gross!) and the person that copies _everyone_ on emails. I was a grammer nazi too but I kept it to myself (didn't want to be THAT person!).
People in glass houses....
1) People who occupy the whole conference rooms just for themselves, when they have a perfectly good office they could use instead.
2) People who bring their kids' fundraising stuff (cookie dough, wrapping paper, jog-a-thon) and come directly to your desk asking for a contribution. Yeah, I saw it posted on the break room fridge and didn't sign up. What does that tell you? That I don't want cookie dough! MOVE ON!
3) People who come to your desk and want to talk about personal matters while you're trying to work. Dude, you're not my best friend. I only talk to you because I'm forced to spend 8-10-12 hours a day here. I really DON'T want to hear about your latest bad date. Really.
I don't work in an office anymore, but yeah... I don't miss it.
And for the record, I'd strangle the woman who microwaves fish for lunch. That is SO not okay.
LOL. Oh the funny things you have to put up with in an office! Sometimes I think I'm the annoying person, because I'm always snacking - crinkling bags.... I try to be quiet, but it's silent in here! We have a loud walker too, she is usually half running/stomping down the hall for some reason.
BUT - I'll make you ALL feel better. I work in an office with dogs. Which is fun, but this morning, one of them took a MASSIVE dump in the office across the hall, and I've NEVER smelled anything so disgusting. So I'm holding my breath, lighting candles. Oh it's BAD!!!! And we also have an office kitty. One morning, my co-worker turned on her heater. A few minutes later we were both gagging. We smelled something awful.. turned out the cat peed on her heater. That smell did not go away quickly. It was unreal. Can't even begin to describe that smell!!!
We have a Makes Stinky Fish Dishes in the Microwave All The Time offender!
And a Someone Else Surely Will Wash This Mug/Plate/Bowl if I Leave It In The Sink Long Enough offender.
Oh--O. more--an I'm Talking On My Phone So Loud Everyone Knows Who I'm Throwing Under The Bus Today offender.
We have a stinky fish offender here too. Yuck!!!
Drinking the last of the coffee and not making a new pot
Not wearing your PPE (personal protective equipment)
Office gossip person. Oh, she annoys the hell out of me!
you would make me nut up with your nose honking.
i would make some other people nut up with my perfume. my boys sat me down and had A Talk with me a few years ago. i'm trying to reform! apparently i can't smell it on me after i've sprayed!
no stinky lunches ought to be an office policy. and people who expect others to clean out their crumbs and coffee grounds ought to have them dumped on their keyboards.
loud walkers don't bother me. loud talkers drive me nuts. loud cell phone users make me want to shoot them in the kneecap with darts. there was a guy in the coffee shop yesterday where my friend fern and i were having a break-out writing session. the door was wide open to let in the fresh spring air, but he had to stomp around the tiny coffee shop bellowing loudly into his cell phone about how much he hates other people being up in his business.
really???????
:)
@@
khairete
S.
When I worked in an office, people who seemed to think spilling a bottle of perfume over their heads was something fashionable to do annoyed me to no end.
We had one guy (in a neighboring department) who had some sort of body odor problem.
Seriously you could NOT come within 6 feet of him.
Using an elevator after he'd been in it was an eye watering experience.
We had another guy who would NOT use the supply cabinet.
Anything he wanted or needed he stole from other peoples desks.
It got to the point where we had to put our own desk supplies away hidden in drawers and left out decoys on top of the desk.
And then there were the speaker phone people.
There was this lady who used a speaker phone to call every last one of her relatives every single day, tell them all the exact same story (we'd have it memorized by the 3rd call) and every call ended with Love You Bye - we started referring to her as LYB.
If her family was any larger we'd have had to pay her over time.
Her boss had an office (with a real door) at the end of the row and one day she's talking to him on her speaker phone, telling him how she can NOT get all her work done, she needs help, and he's on HIS speaker phone, in his office with the door open and we're all hearing both sides of the conversation, in stereo and it was resembling a tennis match the way you could look back and forth between them.
I am SO GLAD I work in a remote office from home now.
I'm with you on the stinky food issue. Some offices have a "no fish/no popcorn" policy since these foods can stink up an entire office (I love microwave popcorn, but don't want to smell it while I work thanks.) Can't do much about the woman that coughs other than mysteriously having her find a supply of throat lozenges on her desk one morning ; ) As for the cowboy boot walker? Now I have that song "these boots were made for walking" stuck in my head. Thanks, thanks a lot. ; p Oh, and your tone was quite clear, "Dad..." must be a little off this morning.
#1 - people who don't check over their work
#2 - people who blame the computer for errors that are very clearly HUMAN errors
These two things are driving me completely crazy at the moment. I'm not immune to making errors myself, but I'm seriously beginning to believe I am the only person in my company who actually checks things over before sending them out.
I hate when people cook something that smells divine and won't share. :(
I know I am guilty of:
- "Flip - flop - flip - flop" as I walk
- I am a LOUD talker...eeks!
- I am a soap opera (everyone knows everything)
- I fried chicken this morning in our kitchen for chicken salad at lunch today... I stunk the office up - oops!
What others are guilty of:
- Not cleaning up after themselves. Drives me batty!
ANY form of bad table manners gets on my nerves. (crunching, slurping, smacking, bad smelling foods, etc).
Sorry, but blowing noses is a huge pet peeve of mine. I affectionaly call one man Horton. I just feel that should be done in the bathroom if it's going to be that nasty. A quick one is one thing, but a really big one? Take it in private.
The high-pitched, squeeky voice that talks SO loud and talks about nothing work related. Annoying.
The girl who laughs louder than anyone and laughs at EVERYTHING. She is so loud. Basically her whole team is loud. We enjoy when they are on travel :).
Hmmm...I'm sure there are more...but that's the top of my list.
My fave was the cubicle mate who would have 30 minute conversations 1 - 2 times a day with her family - in Polish.
Speakerphones. Had a boss who talked to everyone on speakerphone and we could hear her 4 cubicles out with her door shut. Now I WAH and I hate when I call individuals and they put me on speaker. Why? Do you have someone in there eavesdropping? Are you too lazy to pick up the dang phone? What is it?
The guy who reheats things like fish curry. For the love of all that's holy, man, do you really have to bring that to the office for lunch?
Then you have all the office yackers. They don't get any work done but they sure distract everyone else and waste oceans of time. My remedy...headphones (not ear buds). Half the time they aren't even plugged in or tuned into music. I just make sure the cord is tucked out of the way, giving the illusion of being tuned in. They make great noise blockers AND they discourage folks from bothering me because I looked focused.
I can't hear him but we do have the older gentleman who calls all of his family daily for the latest updates. I can only begin to imagine that joy. Then we have the other older gentleman who stands way too close to his employees who are seated at their desks so his beer gut rubs their shoulders as he tries to explain something to them. Oh wonderful.
Here are a couple of my favorites at my current job.
---The "Expert". Doesn't matter what you know...he always knows it better or in more detail. Frequently acknowledges comments with..."yes, but...."
---The "Hypocondriac". EVERY DAY there is some physical ailment to complain about. My head hurts, my back hurts, my stomache is upset...blah, blah, blah.
I realize your post is meant to light but I want to say that something you said about "your friend" being your age "so she doesn't have emphysema" is inaccurate. She could have the condition regardless of her age and it is possible that she could have a type of asthma and not know it. I had an on again off again cough in addition to a horrible cough that would linger when I was sick (often w/ bronchitis). Turns out I had allergy induced asthma. If I kept my symptoms treated when they started, I could prevent a full blown attach or bought of bronchitis that often would follow. A few years back, I was super busy w/ work and couldn't get to the doctor and let it go. When the cough became so bad that I could barely catch my breath and it was happening ALL day, I started daily medication. She really should get it checked and under control...may not need to treat all the time once she gets it stopped.
As for the some of the other things, you do seem to be nit-picking. For the messy kitchen guy, you have three options...quit cleaning up after him, his boss can say something directly to him, or do nothing and it all remains the same.
The one that knows everyone else business and will make sure the entire office is in the loop.
The one that will not open their mouth to speak until you speak to them.
Hi My name is MOB and I am the stinky fish in the microwave co-worker!
Shux I made salmon last night.........I have not done that in a while but I will.
The last office I worked in had a cafeteria that prepared your food to order so I didn't have to deal with stinky food smells they always had great smelling options.
The office gossip, every office has at least one person that insists on talking about everyone else behind their backs and/or complains that the boss makes so much more money than everyone else.
Bad hygiene, I DO NOT want to smell anyone’s BO. A wash cloth and some soap will get rid of that if they have no time to shower.
Flip Flops, they are not appropriate attire for an office. When people look like they are headed to the nightclub or the beach for their lunch hour.
When people insist on coming in when they are very sick. You know the ones that complain they have a fever and feel so awful and can't stop coughing or blowing their noses.
Oh, you are reminding me why I've worked for myself for years. I expect I'm going to go back to having a life which includes a break room someday....
Very annoying:
*the 'very public' private cell phone calls.
*The people who decide the break room is the place to share their conspiracy theories/religion/regurgitation of whatever they heard on Paranoid Talk Radio.
*The people who decide the break room is The Crying Room or the Place to Discuss My Relationship Problems. (esp. love when they are hashing it out over the phone.. see public private cell phone calls)
I'm also not a fan of lateness, either. Working at daycares, I've had more than my share of assistants who had a chronic lateness problem. It's not like they change the clocks every day, folks! We depend on timeliness because of classroom combining and teacher:child ratios...it's not just some capriciousness on my part that I want my coworkers to be on time!:)
Your office mate with the cough, could have acid reflux.. does not matter if she is thin, young and healthy..
She should get that checked. It can lead to throat cancer.
I'm the office throat clearer. I'm fully aware of it, but can't help it. It feels like I have phlegm right there. For me, it is how my body manifests my seasonal/environmental allergies. Because I'm aware of it, I try not to get irritated by the gum popper, or the overly loud laugher. I do get a bit irritated with the constant unspoken battle over the thermostat. I'm cold blooded by nature, and keep a sweater on my chair at all times. But really, hormonal hot-flash lady.... I prefer not to work in an ice box.
I work by myself, primarily, but man this is a funny thread!
I cannot STAND the person that copys any and all supervisors on an email about a complaint they have regarding me. When 9 times out of 10 it's their fault, they are just dying to show someone that I'm not perfect, LOL which I never claim to be, they just think I am for some reason??? Please take that insecurity out somewhere else. I am not in the slightest bit interested in obtaining your job. It's just irritating and the supervisors make fun of you too :)
I am the cough/clear throat person. I have allergies, sorry. I TRY not to do it when people are actually in the office with me, bc I know from hearing someone else do it, its MAJORLY annoying. Especially whenever they aren't even aware they are doing it. UGH
LOL Depending upon my mood, I am a grammar Nazi, if I feel like being a troll at the moment. Although I have learned to slack off since I intentionally make errors as well. Sometimes it's just easier and it's acceptable now :)
I hate it whenever 'Lack of planning on your part constitutes an emergency for me'. Really?!? Do your job, quit screwing off when you have a deadline (save that for later) and organize your own work.
Oh and I'm that person that talks about her only child... whenever I have time to actually open my mouth about something not work related. And, I'm the 'Pretty girl' that everyone hates.
LOL - loving these!
@Blessed - you got 2 people for those?? we got one that is both!
lol, I needed that good laugh.. Ahh Yes, Godzilla. There is this lady, who I can feel her coming from a mile away, she is also not very heavy set, but she just walks so hard, my computer monitor shakes. So imagine you are working right across the street from the airport, and your first day out on the floor, and you monitor just starts shaking for no reason... Yea I had a mini melt down..
lmbo, girl, that sounds like a good episode of Seinfeld. I'm sure you are hypersensitive to smells right now. When I was pregnant I had bionic smell. I could drive past a dumpster and tell you what was in it!
My co-workers have alot of quirks, I dare not say because they may stumble upon this site some day! So, I will share mnine. I procrastinate about scanning things into the computer. If there is a missing doc, T. did it. Can't find something? It's probably on Tracys desk. They also hate that I have a bunch of completely dependant people that will only work with me. They call them my "babies." They bring me flowers and gift cards and it royally annoys my coworkers! Sorry yall.
