Pacifiers, Toddler Beds, and Potty training...which Order to Do It In?

Updated on January 05, 2009
H.B. asks from Denton, TX
5 answers

My daughter is 16 months old and I'm getting ready to break her of some baby habits. She currently takes a pacifier at bed time and nap time only, with the exception of long road trips. She still sleeps in her crib but I catch her trying to get out occasionally. She likes to play in my bed and get under the covers saying "Covers, covers, night night." She is also ready for the potty. She tells me when she needs to go, she wipes herself, she can go long periods with a dry diaper, and she will sit on the potty. She tries to take her diaper off, put diapers on her stuffed animals, and tugs at her dirty diapers.
My plan was to take the paci away first as soon as the holidays were over and our routine was back to normal. When she passed that milestone, I was going to convert her crib. Once I had her sleeping successfully in the toddler bed, I wanted to start potty training.
My first question is whether or not you think this plan is sound or if I should do the toddler bed before the paci or just go ahead and potty train since she seems ready. She is not going to want to give up the paci and I will have a fight on my hands with that one!
But here is where things got complicated...just before Christmas, she fell down while running through the house and fractured her tibia. She is now in a full leg cast. She can still get around fine, walking, dancing, jumping, climbing with no problems. But I feel guilty about taking away her paci and adding that extra stress to her while she is in a cast, so I've put the whole plan on hold until it comes off sometime in late January.
My second question...would you wait on the plan or go ahead and do it if your child was in a cast? I know that potty training with it is out of the question...the last thing we want seeping down into that cast is urine!
So I guess I'm just looking for your advice on my plan sequence and whether you would put if off or just go for it (with the exception of the potty training) regarding her circumstances.
TIA...your advice has always been helpful in the past!

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So What Happened?

Well it's been awhile since my post but I just wanted to let you know how things are going. We took the pacifier away in late Feb. several weeks after her cast was removed. One afternoon, she woke up from her nap, holding 2 of them. I told her they were gross and asked her if she wanted to throw them away. She said, Yes, so I threw them out. That night she fought for about 2 hours before finally going to sleep; the next day at nap time, she fought for an hour; that night she didn't even ask for it. She's never asked for it since then. Shortly after Easter, I found her straddling the rail of her crib, she was holding on tight, crying "Help you." I helped her down and converted the crib immediately. We had no problems with the transition at all. She loved her big girl bed; she pranced around her room saying "Such a big girl!". I plan on trying potty training this week; yesterday morning when I got her up, I found that she had removed her diaper and peed in her bed! She's been going at night before her bath on her little potty and will ask to use it occasionally so I think it's time to try.

More Answers

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K.C.

answers from Dallas on

I personally would do the pacifier first, then the bed, then potty training. I would wait to do any of this until she is out of the cast. Once she is back to normal then start removing these things.
We took my sons pacifier around 14 mos. I did it over a long weekend (I worked). It took him about 3 days to get used to it. I cut one of the pacifiers and showed him it was broken when he wanted it. I cut all of them so that he could see they were broken and couldn't be used. Bed time was a little rough those first couple of days but after about day 3 he was fine. THe transition to a big boy bed is still a struggle. He gets up throughout the night and it took a while to get him to go to bed in the big boy bed. He goes through phases where he will go to bed fine and sleep all night long, but that will be a battle I'm sure I'll face for a while.
Getting her a teddy bear or blanket that she likes will help with transition of no pacifier.
My thought is I wouldn't want her going to a big girl bed with a pacifier. If she's in a big girl bed and then you take the paci away, getting her to stay in the bed and go to bed will be even more tough.
Potty training I would do last.
Good Luck!
Stick with your plan, sounds like you've got it planned out.

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M.B.

answers from Dallas on

Ditto on the bed first - that will only make the potty training easier. The paci will be a source of comfort through these transitions. Once she's well settled in her bed, buy her a new toy (let her pick it out) that is only a bedtime/nite-nite toy. That can be her new source of "self-comfort" that's she's currently getting from the paci. I have a friend that did this and it works great. Although she did this first and let him keep the paci too, with the paci transition being easier this way.

Also, please don't make a battle with the paci. You're the one that gave it to her, so it really needs to be negotiated with her when she she gives it up (within reason of course -i.e., she shouldn't be going to kindergarten with it). Again, trading it for a new toy might be a good approach. If you take away the paci too soon, she is far more likely to go to the thumb, which obviously is far bigger of a battle.

One other approach might be for the paci to get lost or break.

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J.S.

answers from Houston on

I did toddler bed (age 2), pacifier (once my son got used to the bed), and potty training (age 3).

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R.E.

answers from Dallas on

I would do the bed first. If she's climbing out of the crib, it's just not safe. Then, I would tackle the pacifier next, but not until she's 100% comfortable sleeping in the bed and not getting up in the middle of the night to get in bed with you. I'd wait until she starts sleeping all night in her own bed. If she's attached to the paci, it could be a reward for staying in her own bed if you wanted to use it as that. Then, once that's done, start the potty training. My son gave up the paci and started going potty within a week of each other. I pulled the paci, and he did the pottying all by himself. He had just turned 3 though. I wouldn't have done them at the same time. That was his doing thankfully. :) Personally, I wouldn't try any disruption to her schedule while she's in the cast, especially her paci if it's her sense of comfort. I'd wait until things are back to normal after she gets it off. This might be a good chance to introduce a new kind of lovey (stuffed animal / blanket) now so that she has something to cling to when the paci goes. My sons both loved their blankets, so we just emphasized that and always promised never to take it away and they clung to it a lot more at first, but after a week or two, the blanket even stayed in bed when they got up.

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A.

answers from Dallas on

Sounds like we all agree bed first, paci later! Esp. right now with so much else going on in her little world. My daughter is 16 months, and while you may not realize this now because she is your first..she is still a baby. I was so different with my oldest than my now 4th daughter!! One thing you could do eventually, is to take her to build a bear and trade her pacifier in for an animal that she could sleep with instead. Someone said we should put the binky inside sort of as a keep sake, but I did not need to find my 2 year old disassembling her bear in the middle of the night:) We are facing this very same dilema with my son (though he is 2.5), and I will be doing the bed first, potty training next, and last the binky. My only real advice is obviously, follow her cues, but dont be in a rush for her to be a big girl, you have plenty of time for that:) ~A.~

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