Parental Controls App to Lock Device After 1 Hour, & Lock Device at Curfew Time?

Keep the device at your house.
If your ex wants to buy your child an ipad and let him/her use it longer there's nothing you can do about it.
Trying to control your child while under the care of your ex is a slippery slope, don't go there.

You do not need an app to TAKE THE DEVICE(S) AWAY.
While I know we are deep into the age of 'there's an app for that' - sometimes the answer you are looking for is not an app.
If you are not with your child - don't let them have access to devices while you are not there.
I think there are still parents out there that grew up before the internet was invented.
It's a privilege, not a right - and I really think it's good for our kids to play tiddly winks and jacks and not be plugged in all the time or at all for awhile.
Curfew time? - They can go read a book anytime!

If you really can't let your child go without a device - then don't charge the battery often (or only charge it to %10) and it will be out of power quickly when your kid is playing with it.

If the judge has allowed your son to spend several days of visitation at a time with his mom I guess she is not a completely awful parent. Let her do her parenting "her way" when she has him and you do parenting your way when you have him, and communicate with her (through lawyers if necessary) about any really important issues.

Oh and, to answer your question - the obvious solution is to simply fly a drone into your ex's house and use it to pull the iPad out of your son's hands. Have a look around your ex's house that way while you're at it.

S.

It's really simple. You don't give your son the iPad to take to his mother's house.

When he is with you? Instead of letting electronics rule your world? Play games with him. Introduce him to D&D, Traveller, Magic or some other game where you have to LOOK at each other and TALK WITH each other.

If he's not into role playing games? Fine. Find something that you can do together that is NOT electronics. Go outside. Go hiking. If you really live in Portland, OR? You have a boat load of outdoor stuff to do. Go camping.

Get away from the electronics.

I sympathize with your dilemma of not having an ex who is on the same page as you as far as parenting goes. That said, I don't know of any good way to explain controlling your child's iPad use when he's with his mother - there's no nice way to say, "You're a terrible parent and I'm taking charge even if your own home." As much as you want the best things for your child, it's going to make things much worse in the long run if you take this approach to criticizing her parenting. And it puts her down in front of your child - which there's no nice way to explain away.

I think your 3 choices are:
1) Get her to agree with you (which may not be possible)
2) Don't let him take the iPad to his mother's (not sure if he also uses it to communicate with you or do homework though, so perhaps that's a problem.
3) Let it go and let her be the sort of parent she's going to be.

At home, I assume you engage him in other fun things that don't involve electronics. We were board game and card game fans with my husband's 2 kids (who don't have a particularly involved mother), and with the son we have together. If you do those at your house and make them totally fun (never saying, "No, you can't have the iPad but you can have the game of 'Clue' instead), he will hopefully want to do more of that because there are laughs and challenges and so on. If you find some games at yard sales, you might even pick up an extra set so he can take it to his mom's house without you worrying about him bringing it back. Let him have fun with her with a few board games or card games (get one of those rule books like Hoyle's that shows how to play all different games) or even a jigsaw puzzle.While I know there are games on the iPad, there's a great advantage to the fine motor skills kids develop while learning to hold a hand of cards or deal out game pieces, and there's great social interaction. As long as parents make these a fun, primary activity instead of "what's left when the electronics are taken away," they are great relationship builders.

yes, i will say 'take the device away.' it stays with you when your son leaves.

if you insist on controlling what happens at the child's mother's house, all you can do is to keep physical control of the device.

otherwise it's up to the mother what happens when the child is in her custody.
khairete
S.

S.

Welcome back to mamapedia.

Instead of looking for an app to do something YOU should do, DO IT. Take the iPad or electronic devices away. Don't expect electronics to be your "guide" and "disciplinarian" just do your job as a parent and take the device away.

YES!! YOU CAN TAKE THE DEVICE AWAY...you just don't want to. The iPad does NOT need to go with him to his mom's house. That solves the problem RIGHT THERE. DO NOT ALLOW HIM TO TAKE IT.

You can also co-parent with your ex and ensure she is on the same page as you. United front always helps.

I understand you want your child to have consistent rules with regards to using electronics, and I can imagine it would be pretty frustrating not to be able to get on the same page with your ex on those rules. However, this is the reality of co-parenting. You cannot control what happens at his/his mother's house, just as she cannot control what happens at yours. I also think it is not disastrous for your child to have more screen time than you'd like during half the week. What if you create a pattern of doing other fun activities with your child during your days? Those will counter any over-indulgence at mom's house.

I think you are over controlling. When they are at their other parents house it's not up to you how long they can be on devices. If you want to control it that much then keep it home. Mom can buy one for the child and then they can be on as long as mom allows.

You need to control what's in your home. Take it away when you want it turned off. Mom has the right to do as she pleases.

Why don't you leave the iPad at your house? If you let him take it to his mom's house, I'm afraid you have to get used to having less control over things. There is a way -- one way to do this though is through Guided Access which is included in Apple's operating system. You can enable it in settings and you set a passcode. Google it. Honestly though, I think you should let him mom have her own rules at her house. Or if your ex-wife agrees to this then yes, go ahead and do it. Make sure she knows the passcode though in case she wants to let him play longer than an hour (I can see a situation where this would be useful...say a road trip. Or he is waiting for her while she gets her hair done, or whatever). You two have to work together on these things. Good luck.

I know one good app (Kidslox). I started using this app not long ago and so far I like it. Unfortunately, it requires constant internet connection to operate, so not sure if it suits your needs. Personally I think that you should not worry about this too much. You say that a kid will be out of your control only for several days. I don't think that it can cause much harm. I understand that your vision is different but I think that you can let your kid go with device. The kid knows that at your house you have your own rules.