Party Planning - Etiquette Question

I always plan enough to feed everyone, especially at that age. I would do light lunch type food: mini sandwiches, veggies, fruit, dips, chips, etc.

Just have snacks (grapes, pretzels, orange slices, stuff like that) and cake. That's after breakfast and before lunch so no one will be expecting a meal at that time. Besides, the kids will be running around so much they're not going to want to sit down and actually eat anyway.
I'd also have water available, if the place doesn't offer it.

You provide food for everyone invited. Since the kids aren't big enough to be dropped off, their parents are also your guests. You feed them just as you would feed the kids.
I know some people feel it's unnecessary to feed the adults at a kid's party, but I've always found that to be incredibly ackward and impolite. Basically, it says bring your kid (and your gift), but don't eat the pizza because I didn't want to buy enough.

I'd provide food for adults too. It gives them something to do while watching and waiting for the kids. Since the party is late morning and not really at lunchtime, you can keep it light -- fruit tray, veggie tray, cheese and crackers.

Why are you bringing in food to feed them? Why not just do cake and drinks and be done? There isn't any need to feed meals to people for coming to a party. They leave, it's lunch time, they go grab something to eat on the way home or go home and eat.

I would also say by 11:30 you're going to be wishing they'd all go home early. For that age group that's a long time for them to do a play place.

I think if you must feed the kids then you have to feed everyone who stayed plus the ones that come in to get their kids will think. "Wow, I wish I'd have stayed so I could eat. Now I have to go fix myself something". SO you ought to offer them food and have enough to it is a real offer.

I'd not feed anyone. They come, have fun, bring small gifts if they just have to, then they go home. No food, no goody bags, nothing but a good time and memories.

Not really, but I always do and end up with left overs.

Most adult will eat their child's left overs (if they take a bite of a cheese stick, the parent might eat the rest for example). I would have finger foods that will be easy to transport and keep after the party (pretzels and chips along with celery sticks and carrots are easy and cheap).

Your time is a huge hint that lunch will NOT be served. I would buy enough cake for each child and one adult per child.

Whenever I have a party, including my daughter's birthday parties as she grew up.... I had enough food for everyone.

Some parents may choose not to eat and that's fine but no one ever leaves a party of mine saying not enough food/drink was available. When I throw a party, I provide for everyone.

Sounds perfect. Playing with friends for up to 2 hours at a playground. Cake and drinks (lemonade, tea, water). Cone hats! Take pics, they will look great. Think fun in little ways.... bubbles, leis, small kazoos, sand tools if there is a sand table, etc. Do bring hand-wipes for cleaning hands! And whatever you do, please, please, please, plan the party you want, not the party that meets other families' expectations. You are not required to have crafts, goody bags, etc. I encourage you to establish your families' customs now, so that you don't become part of a cycle of doing what other families do. What a great way to be true to yourselves. Very handy in the future! All my best.

At 3, very few parents will drop their kids and leave them until pick-up time, as with older kids. Even if they did, you'd have to hire chaperones, which would cost you more than food for adults.

But in this time frame, they will have had breakfast and will be leaving before lunch, so I would mostly do some healthy snack-type finger foods, juice for kids, iced tea for adults.

Pizza (delivered) and cake makes things easy.

ETA:

I didn't mean it to sound like you had to do a craft or games. That's just what we did for my son's 4th bday party and it really only lasted about 10 minutes and was a way to keep everyone in one spot until everyone had gotten there. In my experience, with younger kids the less structure the better. Otherwise it is like herding feral cats.

My daughter's 4 year party we all met at the park. The dads watched the kids on the playground. The moms sat and visited. When everyone started getting hot and tired after about 30-45 minutes we rounded everyone up for cupcakes and lemonade. We actually asked people not to bring gifts that year. Our state government had shut down and I knew that several of the kids we had invited were from families that had parents with temporary layoffs or government benefits that were frozen. I didn't want anyone to feel they couldn't come because they couldn't afford a gift. After cake we handed out bubbles and helium balloons and the kids played with those for about 15 minutes. People kind of started drifting away then.
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Two hours seems long for 3 year olds. I'd go with no more than an 1-1/2 hours. Just provide some small snacks (apple slices, bananas, baby carrots, goldfish crackers, juice boxes). But if you are having cake, I don't think I would provide very much.

We didn't do friend parties until my kids were 4. The went from 10-11:30. We did them at the park. We maybe started with a small craft or game (my son had a Fresh Beat Band party so they decorated tag board guitars). They ran and played for a half hour or so. We stopped and had small pieces of cake/cupcakes and lemonade/water and opened presents. The kids maybe ran and played a little bit more. By then everyone was worn out, starting to have meltdowns, and we're ready to go home. I made sure I had enough cake and drink for kids and parents (and any younger siblings). That was all I did. I ended early so I wouldn't have to provide lunch. I had several parents tell me it was the perfect amount of time and not too much food so kids would eat a decent lunch before nap/rest time.

I would just provide more of the same (whatever you are providing kids) parents may want to nibble. I doubt they would eat a lot but just have it available. Moms have good suggestions below :)

Where it's not really lunch time, snack type stuff is more than adequate.

Good luck and have fun!

Yes. 3 year olds are probably not going to be dropped off. Parents will stay.
I wouldn't want the embarrassment of not being able to offer them a meal!

When the parents were expected to stay (and with 3yr olds, that would be the case), I always provided them refreshments. It usually meant a couple of extra pizzas, no need to go overboard. Maybe a veggie tray and bottled water from Costco.

I like to do my kid's birthdays at our house. I like to keep it simple with pizza and cake and order enough for both kids and adults, there's always a lot leftover because lots of times parents don't eat or drop off. It doesn't bother me to have leftovers because I'd rather that than not have enough. It makes dinner easy for the next couple of nights too.

I think that it would be a nice thing to provide food for the parents as well since they are too small to just drop off. I completely understand having it an indoor place that helps with providing services. Have fun and happy bday

If you're worried about looking inhospitable around mealtime, can you move the party time? I'd say that a 10-12 party wouldn't require the full pizza treatment usually found at a kid's party. A giant Costco sheet cake should feed enough for the kids and adults. If you're asking people to wait on their kids for a couple of hours, it would be nice to have food and drink for everyone. That's what we always did. Bottled waters and cake won't cost that much, particularly when you think about what you're dropping on the party venue.

Maybe a veggie tray and some bags of grapes for the kids. but other than that just a cupcake or pc of cake. no one will expect a meal. I would have a bottle of water for each kid or some pitchers of water out so kids can get a drink. but thats it.

It's not expected, especially for those hours and a party that short. I'd assume you'd offer a piece of cake, but even that is going above and beyond. Sometimes people will put out munchie type of food for adults, party mix, veggies and dip, etc. Just light fare to nibble on, but it's really not necessary. Parties for kids that young allow parents to enjoy watching the fun, and that is enough.

Sure, but just snacks for everyone and get things that will keep if you have leftovers - cheese sticks, fruit or veggie platter, crackers, beverages. A between-meals time frame doesn't warrant ordering pizza or anything like that, just munchies are fine.

As an adult, I ate before taking my child to a party if I was planning to stay. I did not expect the host to feed me, since I was not a guest of the honoree.

ETA: "Or am I still required to do games and crafts?!"
You aren't REQUIRED to dfo anything. If you're having the party at a playground, just let them rip and roar before and after cake and ice cream.