Picky Eater - Belmont,NC

Try letting her help you cook dinner. I mean don't let her put stuff in the oven or anything dangerous. Just let her mix some stuff up and she will thinks its cool to help mommy cook and it might be a little bit easier on you getting her toeat healthier to because she made it. Hope this works for you. It worked with my neice that I had most of the time. Good Luck

Hi S., i know what you are going through, my three year old will do the same thing, i myself was raised on mcdonalds my whole life and never learned how to cook until i was married and my first daughter was born. I have learned with my daughter that if i don't give her any snacks after three o'clock she will eat her dinner. maybe not a big helping of what i am cooking but she will eat. I also agree with the other moms about letting her go shopping with you and helping you pick out the dinner selections. It's a good bonding method and she feels like she was "mommy's big helper"!! Take your time don't rush things, she will eventually come around. keep your head up.

It sounds terrible, not letting a child eat, but my neice and my son are both extremely picky eaters...or were. First, like said before, cut out the junk food. Don't even have it around the home, which may mean a huge sacrifice for the rest of the family, but only for a short time. Take her to the store with you and let her choose 2 fruits and 3 veggies. Any three she wants. My son LOVES doing this, and he'll eat whatever he chose because HE got to choose it!
Also, don't give options at dinner time. If the family is eating veggie soup, so is she. When my neice refused to eat it, they had her sit at the table anyway till everyone was done. They left her bowl there and said if she got hungry again before bedtime, she could come back to the table and eat her soup...cold. She refused all night. The explained that until she ate that soup, she could eat nothing else. Which meant when she woke up in the morning and they ate cereal, she got a cold bowl of veggie soup. She argued, but then because she was so hungry, she gave in and ate it. It's not cruel, it's not inhumane. She learned that she doesnt' get to eat whatever she wants. For her it only took that one time, and she learned that at dinner time she ate what she was given. I don't think that at every meal you should make them finish their dinner the next day. If they eat a little and don't like it, well, that was their dinner. But at least they ate some.
So, let her be a part of the choosing healthy foods and cooking. Explain that she's part of the family, so what you eat, she eats. Start slowly replacing her chips and candy with fruit and veggies. My son would actually prefer to eat an apple over candy, even though he does love candy.
Your child won't hate you forever for teaching her how to eat healthy. She'll actually thank you later when she isn't obese and unhealthy from eating nothing but junk food! Make McDonalds and candy a treat, something special she gets very rarely. So often these days, McDonalds is the norm istead of a treat like it was when I was growing up. My son wants McDonalds every day, but he knows he only gets it on very special days!

Hi S.,

My cousin is a picky eater, and my aunt did not want to push the issue. My cousin is 12 now, she still only eats chicken nuggets, fries, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, mac&cheese and junk food. At all family gathering my aunt has to make sure that one of the above items is on hand or she will not eat.

My cousin has always been very active in cheer and dance. This summer prior to school starting, all children wanting to participate in activities had to have a full check up.

My cousins doctor was appalled at my cousins true health conditions. For a 12 yr old her triglicerides where thru the roof, her cholesterol was off the chart, and she had the starting signs of type II diabetes, even though she is as skinny as a rail. Her doctor explained that she was in fact extremely malnurished. My aunt stated that she does not know the last time my cousin ate fruit (that wasn't in the candy form) or vegetable (and no fries don't count).

My cousin is now on a very strict diet and vitamin routine. The doctor told my aunt that allowing a child to eat that way can cause many health problems, that may not show up until their late teens or early adulthood. And once they show up most are not reverseable, only treatable with lifetime medications.

I have a friend that lets her 3 yr old help her cook, this child will eat anything ecspecially if he has helped to prepare it. More and more food shows and sites talk about getting children to eat properly and have proven that kids that get to cook tend to eat.

Good Luck

My daughter is 5 and was a very picky eater for a while, or at least it seemed like it to me. It seemed all the foods she use to love she hated. We did the let her go without and that didn't work. We even made it to where if she didn't eat what we gave for one meal she had to have it the next until it was gone. Needless to say neither worked. She would go 3 or 4 days without eating hardly anything at all except 1 or 2 bites and she would say she was full or sick. By day 3 or 4 she would really be sick so we would give her some real food we knew she liked to eat. Then she got to where she wouldn't eat anything at all. Finally we got her some boost which is basically the same as pediasure but cheaper. After drinking those for a few days (1per day) she would want more food. She actually grew in height and gained weight to. We finally figured exactly why she didn't like certain foods. One was she was against foods cooked in crock pots (my husband loves to cook in them but "can't"), then there is broccoli she doesn't like the texture when it is cooked but loves it raw with ranch dressing, potatoes she loves with gravy or ranch. Just experiment and find out why and how to make them look kid friendly and taste the way she wants. Importantly get rid of the junk food. If it is not available then she can't have it nor will she get it. It will take a while for her to getg use to but don't worry if she gets real hungry she will eat in the mean time try the boost or pediasure they will help her from starving to death.

I have a similar issue with my 3 year old. My husband keeps her during the day and he has a sweet tooth and opts for the "easy" foods (chips, etc.). I have found that on the days that he does not let her snack, she will eat dinner well. He just has to be strong and not give her the candy or whatever it is she asks for. Last night, she wanted candy when I got home from work. I told her she could have a piece after dinner. DH had not let her snack and she ate corn and turkey-sausage. On days he lets her snack, she doesn't want anything and will only eat some cheese and a peanut butter sandwich for dinner. It does make a big difference! I promise you that refusing to give her what she asks for wont starve her! My daughter is proof that if you offer foods you'd like kids to eat and don't have the other stuff around, kids will eventually eat what's there! (granted, they won't like everything, but at least they'll try it!)

I have to agree with the doctor. At this time I am at fault for continuing to allow my 16 month old son to have a bottle instead of forcing him to eat more solids. He won't even try anything if it feels funny or looks strange to him. I bought one more can of formula yesterday just so I can start weaning him. He will have no choice but to eat what I put in front of him since I am starting today to set a routine of solids. I will give him one bottle first thing in the morning and one at night while we rock him for bedtime. It is hard just because he is always smiling and giggling unless he is hungry and then he gets impossible. I know it may take a week of this and then I will be on the other side of getting him to eat whatever I put in front of him.

I do not give him ice cream but rarely frozen yogurt, no candy, no soft drinks, rarely plain chips, and nothing with heavy dyes, preservatives, or artificial sweeteners such as aspartame and several others that are out there. My body can't tolerate them so I can only imagine what it does to a child.

Warning - I have two nephews that are intolerant of certain dye colors in food. It affects each one of them differently. One nephew it makes him loud and hyper with no self-control and the other who is 6 years old it makes him almost hateful and violent. When you are pregnant the doctors (if you have one that is smart enough to tell you) do not eat certain dye colors and other artificial and processed foods. It's not good for the fetus. They know it's not good for them but not sure what the outcome is after birth. It's just not healthy.

I am not saying to never eat anything that is junk, I have it in my house but good choices and moderation is the key.

My daughter was the same way. She has since started kindergarten and is getting the nutrition she needs because she doesnt have a choice. Dinner however is another story, all she wants is raman noodle soup. Its not bad though. We have taken away the candy except for special occasions or when she deserves a prize. Its hard but eventually she got used to it.

I have a similar problem with my 16 month old. He doesnt want to eat vegetables or fruits and only eats rice, beans, chicken, mashed potatoes and whatever we eat except for the vegetables. If we go out we give him nuggets and sometimes I make some for him here, and thats the only junk food I gave him because if we are eating out thats the most accesible food around.

I was watching Maury yesterday and the said something really true and is that if you dont buy chips or candy, your daughter wont have the choice of eating them in your house. Try eliminating them from your grosery list to see what happens.

My daughter who is 4 does the same thing. If she doesn't say what she wants or she doesn't say yes when you ask her if you like to eat this or that. She will not eat it. What I had to end up doing was taken her to store to do weekly shopping for our food that week. I told her out of the week she gets to pick one meal that all of us will eat. But each of us gets a turn to eat what we want for that meal. We all have to try it. It worked. Now she eats variety of things.

I have a six year old with the exact same problem. She is extremly picky and does not eat meat except chicken, bologna, and hotdogs. However she eats friuts and vegetables sometimes. I try to give them to her as often as possible. My feeling is as long as she is healthy and not over weight let her eat what she wants as long as she is eating.

Hey S.! I have 4 children...ages 15, 13, 8, and 7 tomorrow he says! ALL of them went through this stage. It's not going to hurt your child if she wants to eat chicken nuggets for breakfast,lunch and dinner! She will outgrow it before you know it. My son went through a stage where he would only ear hotdogs, mac and cheese, and bologna sandwiches. It got a bit old after 2 or 3 months, but he finally outgrew it and now loves his veggies! It will pass, just be patient. Don't let your doctor dictate to you. You're her mother, and know her better than anyone else. I couldn't let my child go hungry, either. I don't know who your child's doctor is, but they sound like a quack! For future reference, here's a number to a GREAT periatrician. God bless you and your family! Good luck with your chicken nugget stage. And don't feel lonely...my oldest daughter went through THAT stage for over a year!

***************************************************************

DR. JOHN TRAYNHAM
c/o PLANTATION PEDIATRICS
1871 SAVAGE RD.
WEST ASHLEY, S.C. 29407
###-###-####

Maybe it would help to not have the chicken nuggets and the chips and candy as choices. having carrots and fruit will help and only having them as choices she will enjoy those just as much as the other! Besides what is the old saying out of sited, out of mind! This is what has help me and my children. It is hard but it does work! Good luck and take care

D.

I don't intend for this to sound harsh and am sorry if it does, but you have to feed your daughter properly. I don't know if you have heard anything about the obesity epidemic right now with children, but it is terrible. There are so many children out there who are overweight and even obese, and it all goes back to their early years. The behaviors and habits she is developing now will carry over as she gets older and that includes eating habits. If she eats chips, and junk food now she will continue to eat junk food when she is 8 and then 16 and then as an adult. With the boom of the electronic age more and more children are less active, sitting playing on the computer, watching tv, and even when they get together with friends they are doing these same things. And because of this they are not burning enough of the calories they are eating so their bodies store it and they gain weight. also by allowing her to eat junk food you are setting her up for a condition called insulin resistance. See everytime she eats something that is processed, or has a high glycemic value the body produces a rush of insulin which causes your blood sugar to go up, you get that burst of energy, but these foods tend to disappear quickly leaving you hungry. This rush of insulin also helps your body to store more energy (calories) and therefore causing weight problems. most little children do not have weight issues and right now she is a healthy weight and that is good, but you have to think what she is setting up for. In 2 or 3 years she will be full fledge in school, having home work every night and spending less and less time playing, and you may notice a change then. Just be careful with what you feed her, if she likes chips and what not, make that a special treat, or a small snack, but first she has to eat a regular healthy meal. You doctor is not telling you to starve your child, but if she is hungry she will eat what you put in front of her. She might protest, but she will eat when she is hungry. Start by giving her chicken, chicken nuggets are not the best, but if they are frozen from home they are not as bad as McD's, and some veggies, when she finishes her food, let her have a small bowl of chips or her choice. you will be glad you made her eat better down the road.

http://fatherhood.about.com/od/parentingadvice/a/healthye...

http://childparenting.about.com/od/recipestips/a/healthye...

There's two links for you to try something from... I agree somewhat with the other mom (Sarah). I feel like what you agree too will become acceptable. YOU are in charge of her eating habits, not her. Get creative. Make wagers with her. When we got my stepson full time (custody transfer due to moms neglect, and this happened to be one area we addressed in court) he would eat nothing but chicken nuggets and fries... pizza, etc. We got creative. We made "choices" for him. We'd cook dinner, something we'd know was tasty, like grilled chicken, but we'd add cheese on top for him! Meatloaf became a quick favorite (we used ground turkey it's much more healthy)... instead of fried foods, we'd buy the orida fries/tots in the bag and BAKE them. Still not the best, but baked IS better! The catch is, always have 2 veggie choices. Green beans AND corn, or Lima beans AND carrots... a neat way to serve cooked carrots is Japonese resturaunt style for her... drain them out of the can (sliced cooked carrots) rinse twice to get all the canned juice off, put a small pat of cholesteral free butter in the pan, and toss them in, sprinkle about 1/4 cup of brown sugar - YUM! toss them around! She'll be sure to love them, a little sweet and tasty!
Give choices though, tell her, you HAVE to pick on AND eat it, so choose 1 veggie. Cut up a very small portion of chicken. All of HER veggie portions sould be the size of HER fist, the meat portions should be about the size of her hand extended. Tell her, eat that all, then you can have a few chips (offer only 5 or so) and if after the chips she complains she's still hungry, offer her ONLY anoter serving of her choice of the meat or veggie.
You're NOT a bad mother, you just got stuck in a bad habit rut. We all do it. There IS something you can do to fix it, and it's not punishing her. But this is the most important statement I will make - YOU HAVE TO MODEL HEALTHY EATING TOO. Buy only baked chips, and fat free cookies. She won't know the difference if you offer them w/o telling her they're fat free. It will become her way of eating. Offer sorbet as icecream, not fat icecream. You will get great results I promise. We had to change our way of the kids eating, for a few reasons. My husband (34) had a heart attack and 3-bypass 2 years ago in January. With that happening to my VERY fit and healthy husband - we found that the cause was 95% genetics. We already have our children pre-disposed to a heart that doesnt process cholesteral properly from genetics, why would we allow ourselves to willingly add to that condition with unhealty eating?

I'm not preaching - but you need to change this pattern - TODAY. Do not wait! You'll thank yourself later, and well - so will your daughter by having a fit healthy habit. My stepson lives with us, has now for 5 years, and if you put cake or manderin oranges in front of him as a dessert choice - he chooses oranges EVERY time. He eats mushrooms, broccoli, etc. All because we never made it dreadful for him. He enjoys trying new things now! He LOVES to eat, and we're ok with it, because he's eating healthy! Good luck to you!

One last thing - about the candy. Here's a logical answer to fixing that problem. If you don't buy it, how could she eat it? IF you feel like you want to reward her good deeds w/ a tasty treat, buy gummy bears or gummy worms - they're 100% fat free, and not half as bad for her teeth. My stepson began living with me and my husband when he was 3, SAME unhealthy habits you speak of with your own child... the ONLY time he gets candy now, is if he uses HIS allowance to buy it. Then - at 3, we only allowed 1 piece per day on WEEKENDS ONLY. Good luck.

Hi! I'm not going to be as harsh as some because you know she needs to eat right, but in the end you just want her to eat, period! I went through the same thing with my oldest. He is almost four also. All he wanted to eat was MCD's and Sonic tator tots. I finally had to just crack down and let him starve until he ate what I put on his plate. If he didn't eat it then I put it in the refridgerator and then he got it at the next meal. They will throw tantrums and whine and cry and call you bad mommy and mean mommy. He went as far as saying he hated me for the first time. It was really, really hard to not give in. I also found putting mashed brocolli in Mac and cheese. They don't even see it! I make him try something new every once in a while and he found out he loves green beans!! He now wants them for breakfast lunch and dinner! It took him a couple of trys but all of the sudden he discovered the "baby beans" inside the green beans and he picks those out and eats them first then the rest of the beans. Also, as every mom knows, ketchup may not be as healthy as you would like, but it sure makes them eat the food!

Good luck!

sorry to say but the doc is right. my daughter went through the same stage and we wouldn't let her get treats or anything if she didn't eat her food and in the morning she will be so hungrya nd eat like a horse but then she realizes that she just can't eat junk food whenever she wants. chicken nuggets aren't bad but try giving pb&j sandwiches and cut out on the chips and candy, their not healthy and she doesn't really need it. i actually never introduced candy and soda to my daughter until she was about 4 maybe a little younger than that but she just started drinking soda when she went to summer camp this summer. if you don't introduce it or have it in the house the better. my daughter got so bad about eating and only wanted fruit snakcs and poptarts that i just stopped buying them until she learned when she could have them.

I went through this too, and I was and still am a picky eater but here's something to try. To get me to eat broccoli, my grandpa would start a debate with me "what kind of tree is it?" and of course I had to eat it to find out. Or we'd look at different books of animals and talk about what the animals eat and why (knowing what you're serving that night helps) bunnies eat carrots, horses eat apples, monkeys eat bannana's ect. andkids love to show off their knowledge. One of my sons like frogs and know they sit on lilly pads. He watched me eat a spinah salad one day, and called it a "lilly pad" salad, and he ate most of it. The rule in my house is 2 good and healthy bites of something. If you still don't like it you don't have to eat anymore, but you don't get anything else that night unless you clean your plate. I've also used cookie cutters to cut things into different shapes, which turns it into a game. The heart spaed on works well. Kids know a heart is love, mine eat it to show me they "love me" or to have "more of my love in them all the time". Hope this helps, or sparks an idea for you!