Pot Smoking Neighbor

Since they are nice neighbors I see no harm in saying to the son, no judgement and you probably are unaware but when you light up the smell is in my house, around the kids and I have to close the windows, could you smoke elsewhere this summer? Then see what happens. If it continues than speak to the parents. Maybe this 20 something will move out? Kinda old to still be living home. Good luck

I think if you "kindly" bring it to their attention they will probably change their smoking area. Good luck. the cops probably wont do anything unfortunately.

My neighbors smoked pot all the time, it seriously gave me headaches, so yeah, I called the police. I wouldn't have at first, but then shady characters started coming around and I found a bag of it that had been thrown in my driveway, and the smokers started acting like idiots all the time... so yeah.

Really though, what Julie B said was perfect, I'd totally do that..

I'm sure he'd appreciate you addressing him directly and explaining the situation instead of ratting him out to his parents or the police. I would just nicely let him know that you don't care what he does as long as it doesn't effect your home or work situation. I'm sure he'll willingly move his smoking area to the side of his yard away from your house. Good luck!

Try just going over when he is outside and ask him to please smoke elsewhere because your kids can smell it. Chances are he will. I can almost guarantee he doesn't want the cops called so he will most likely comply with your request. Good luck.

Just ask this guy directly if he could smoke on the other side of his house. You should not have to endure this. I am horribly allergic to pot in just about any form so it would be a huge deal to me. I would think this guy could make an effort for you. Especially if you are nice about it.

Good luck.

I would go over with a nice comfortable lawn chair and invite him to sit in it at the furthest spot from your house while he partakes. explain your situation nicely and with a sense of humor and he might just go along with the plan! you might want to thro in that while you dont care that he smokes weed, some of your clients might and you'd hate to see him get busted should someone want to turn him in.

i don't get calling the cops before talking to him and giving him the opportunity to fix the situation himself without escalating everything to the ugly. you're perfectly within your rights to want to enjoy your open windows without pot smoke wafting in. it's perfectly okay to tell him so, pleasantly and courteously.
he sounds like a peaceable hippy sort. he's not having wild parties, loud music, drinking or tripping or crazy sex games where your kids can see. doubtless he doesn't realize his quiet smokes are bothering anyone.
there's no need for you to seethe silently, or for the confrontation that your husband is worried about to occur. this can be handled straightforwardly and pleasantly.
khairete
S.

I agree w/ Missy. I would go to him directly. I'm sure he isn't even thinking about how it's effecting your household.

He probably thinks no one smells it. Be nice. Say a student complained, and confirm to him it's really strong in your house. You can sort of leave it on him to deduce what to do about the fact that you smell it. It's illegal. If it's medical (doubtful in his 20's), he'll tell you, but the fact remains it's in your house and you have kids, and he'd have to be super lame to keep it up, in which case you may have to reassess. Just for the record, in all my life, I've never had a neighbor quit something when I asked, no matter how outrageous, so be prepared to call the cops...I don't really get the husband's argument. It's an illegal (most likely) substance which is directly affecting you in your home.

hi,
I was a pot smoker when i was younger, and my dad used for cancer. if i was in your shoes, next time i see him outside, i would go over and talk to him.
I understand it is his yard, and what he does is on him. I cant stand people in my business, expecially if im doing something in my home, and not out on the streets if that makes sense. But i would go and let him know what your feeling, and maybe you can come up with something like after dark he can, ext.
If i was him, i would understand, and work out something to where i wasnt bothering someone else.
most pot smokers dont want trouble and if they hear that its bothering someone they will usually understand and do what they can.
Then again i was a casual pot head i didnt do it daily, i wasnt some kid trying to be cool and cause trouble.
But i have been clean for several years now !!!
YAY

Talk to him nicely O. time then call the cops the second time.

Open the can of worms.

Well, I live in California where it's perfectly legal to grow and smoke pot for people who have 215 cards, meaning it's medically prescribed. There's not a darn thing that can be done about it.
My neighbor smokes pot like she invented the stuff. We smell it all the time.
But, I really like my neighbor. She is super nice, honest, she watches out for things when we're gone and we look after things for her when she's gone. She's an amazing cook and always brings us things that she makes. We do the same for her. In the scheme of things, smelling pot is the least of the problems a person can have with a neighbor.
I understand your situation. I have friends who could care less if people smoke the stuff, but they are allergic to it so they have to close their windows and things too when their neighbors are outside smoking it.
I suppose you could talk to the guy nicely and let him know that you can really smell it. Maybe say that you don't want in his business or care what he does really, but you have concerns about your kids and the kids you teach smelling it.
He may be really nice about it in return and say that he didn't realize you could even smell it. Maybe he truly doesn't. People from all walks of life smoke pot and perhaps if you approach him the right way, he'll try a different spot in the yard or something. It's worth a try.
No matter where he goes in the yard, there will be some days if the wind is right that you will catch a hint of it.
I work at a hospital and I swear I smelled it in the parking lot when I went from my office to take charts to the surgery suite. It has a distinctive smell, to be sure.

If this is a nice family and they are good neighbors aside from this, I would try gently mentioning something. I wouldn't make threats.
Heck, I might be tempted to mention it about half an hour after you smell it while the guy is feeling particularly mellow.
:)

Kids are taught that drugs are bad in school and at home, but then we also have to explain why it's okay for some people because it's considered their "medicine".......at least in California.
I wouldn't get the police involved first thing.
I don't know the specific laws in NY, but unless he's a major dealer or something, the most he would likely get would be a ticket for misdemeanor possession of a joint or something.

I hope you can find a compromise.

Best wishes.

Dont call the cops, discuss it with the son personally since he is in fact an adult. If the son is not respectful enough to understand why he needs to take that to the garage, or elsewhere then you should tell his parents, and tell the parents you wont tolerate your children getting a contact high and that you will resort to the police if you have to.

I would try the most amicable way first. But i wouldnt put up with it either.

Ok, I just have to laugh, respectfully of course, at your hubby's logic: you can't do anything because he is in his yard. Well, it is still illegal. It's not like the law doesn't apply because the guy is in his backyard.

Not getting into the legalize it or not debate but if it bothers you, call the cops. I wouldn't confront him directly. Good luck.

Tell him to smoke elsewhere or u will be calling the cops.

Maybe you could burn a huge amount of smudge that would eventually filter into their home, then when they politely come knocking on your door to ask you to move the smell, you can tell them then that you are covering up the pot smoke from their yard....

Sort of kidding there...I bet the kid does not know you can smell it and thinks he's getting away with. So I think the gentle but firm approach that he is not going undetected is the right thing to do. Please smoke your weed elsewhere. I don't want my kids exposed to this. I'm allergic to it...yada, yada..he'll get the picture. Because in reality you could call the cops as it is illegal. Not that you want to go there, but it's implicit within your kind and informative approach.

Good luck. Let us know how the conversation goes. If it turns into a confrontational debate, you're probably doomed. Plant really tall bushes this spring.

I dont know why people act like pot is such a big deal. I dont smoke it but i have grown up around it and its no bigger deal then somebody getting drunk. He's doing it in his own yard and personally the cops cant go in and do a search of his house by one neighbor calling the cops and saying i can smell pot coming into my house. Burn some candles in your house so you dont have to smell it.

Last time I checked, pot is still illegal here, is it not? If it were me, I would have no hesitation calling the police. You and your children should not have to be subjected to this nonsense.

Is he/his family the kind of pot smoker that is a jerk and loser and a trouble-maker?
Or is he a professional?
Meaning, if he is a trashy jerk... then he might cause trouble? Which you don't want.

Even at his age, does his Dad know he is smoking POT?
I am sure, he wouldn't want his Dad to know.

If he is RATIONAL human being... you could just go and tell him, "Your smoking pot is affecting my kids... it comes into our house....I am sure your Dad would want to know.... so can you not do it or do it someplace else...?"

It is illegal.
Calling the Cops, can be done, anonymously.
He can't prove it was you who tattled on him.
Unless, you talk to him first, then call the cops, then he will know it is 'probably' you.

I would personally tell the kid to please take it somewhere else, either to another part of the yard, or anywhere where the smell doesn't go in your windows.

If it's affecting your family's quality of life, then you need to act. Call and report it!

if you have this much of an issue put in an annonymous call to the police

I would notify the police... and remain anonymous. If you talk to them then have to call the police later they will know it's you! That's just what I would do. I doubt he will stop smokin' pot just because you said so. He probably doesn't want his house to stink either so he won't move it inside lol!

To be honest I feel bad for your situation but I don't really think pot is all that bad. Of course I don't partake of it but do not think of it as something really bad for those that do. It is no worse than someone taking a valium to mellow out. Of course since it is smoked it does effect others.

I would absolutely talk to the parents. Tell them their child is smelling up your house and you are wondering if he could find someplace else to smoke.

I would start the conversation something like this:

Hey X, I have a little issue that I need your help with. When Xx is smoking (don't say smoking pot, that is accusing him of being on drugs, saying "smoking" is less likely to put them on the defensive) on the back patio it is coming right in my windows. Could he smoke closer to the back fence or on the other side of your house?"

They can simply respond by saying they'll ask him to move somewhere else or they'll say it's his backyard he can do what he wants. Either way they know you can smell the tobacco product and if it is pot they'll know they need to be more careful so the police don't get involved.

Also, there are a lot of herbal cigarettes on the market these days that I would swear are pot or other drugs but they buy them at the herbal store so I wonder if it is actually pot.

W.: Horrible. I can SO relate. Have you had any luck with this? We are in a similar situation (small child, constant smell and sight of pot effecting how my child grows up, fearful, allergies) - any luck or suggestions from your end?

I'm going through the same problem right now, We live in a apartment top floor, My neighbor is a nice person and she is a young woman, She has a toddler but I don't think it's right that she smokes her weed around her.And it smells so bad, it makes my apartment smell like a dope factory. I feel like if I call the Police they would know and would mess with our cars or even break into our place. My Hubby says we should wait till we move then say something to the Police. Or Child Protective services.