Potty and the 3 Year Old Boy

I have a 2 1/2 year old boy. He is fully potty trained and its wonderful. I made a huge deal out of it and would play games. One time we put a bowl of gold fish crackers in the bathroom and we would toss one in the toilet. I would laugh and say haha lets peepee on the fish and watch him swim around. Then we would laugh & laugh about it after he did it. If he had an accident we would act silly about it, laugh & then start over. He picked out his favorite underwear. I never rushed or got upset if he messed up! It will happen over nite just have patients for the little guy and love & praise him when he makes you proud.
Good luck!!!

J.

My Dr said do not push the issue and they will let you know when they are ready. Low and behold both my son at 3 and my daughter at 2 1/2 started going potty. I found both of them on the toilet without my prompting and they have been potty trained ever since.

A.

Make potty training a game. It is called flooding. Give him a lot to drink and then take him to the toilet every 15 min until successful. Praise him highly! Do this for about 3 days. He will get the message that it makes mommy happy for no wet clothes. Try it it worked for my son.

If you use the reward system, you must reward him every time. He is too young to be rewarded once a week. Then slowly make it every two times he is successful. Then 3 times and so on. But remember his age and his attention span.

This is ok. The worse thing you can do is to pressure him with some neurotic need you have. Let him go at his own pace, RELAX.

Good luck,
C., RN

Try the praise and reward system.
Take him to the potty on a regular time in the morning. When he does us it praise his behaivor. Once a week tell hime this is his reward for using the potty all week like a big boy. Teh reward can be taking him to the park, making some homemade cookies with you,or visiting Grandma an pa,etc.
Hope this helps.
Chris

Hi M.; do you have an older boy or is your husband around.If so get them to take him in with them.Or if you
can and live in the country let him use the back door.My little man was hard at first.I let him go on the back porch some and then James started leting him go with him.It didn't take long at all after that he just need a man to show him how it is done and someone to praise him for doing good.

I had the same problem with my now 5 year old son. I tried Everything, and i mean EVERYTHING. It wasn't till we moved to a new house that he finally started using the potty chair. By then, he was already 4!! I put his potty chair in the hallway where he had easy access to it, and he could watch his tv while he waited. It took just one week and him peeing on himself several times before he finally got it down. I also used stickers as a reward for going potty, instead of food or candy. I gave him a lil star for going pee, and a big "elmo" sticker for going poop. He loved getting those stickers and putting them on his bed so he could look at them at nite. A friend of mine suggested i take him to the potty every 5 or 10 minutes until he went potty. This may work for you, but with an infant on my hip 24/7, i couldn't find the time to take my older son to the potty that often. Some boys are emotionally ready to go potty at 3; most aren't ready till around 4. My best advice is to be patient and keep trying several times a day to get him to sit on the potty; one day he will go!!

Ok this sounds mean but my son's preschool teacher asked permission to do this. I sent several changes of clothes!! They would ask him to go potty every so often and if he said no when it was time for everyone to go potty and he pottied his pants they made him sit in a chair wet while everyone else went first! He had to be the last to go. It took 3 days and he was over being wet and sitting there in it. His teacher has been one for over 30 yrs. so I figured she knew better than anyone what to do. He got to where he was begging to be changed but he had to go last!!!

Truly I would not worry about it to much. My son was the same way and then around the time he was turning 4 he decided he was going to be a "big boy". After that we had no problems- he was all about it. Some kids just take a little longer.

hey...

the only thing that has worked so far for my child is not to put anything on her (diaper, pull-up, underwear). we tried everything you have done at first, but she really doesn't care about being wet! we have been trying this for the past couple of days, and she goes to the potty every time! i know boys are WAY different than girls, so this may not work. i may be in the same boat as you in a couple of years when my son hits potty-training age!

good luck!

J.

I thought my son would never potty train either. We started earlier at 2, but he didn't care if he was wet or dirty. Then at 3 he showed a little interest. We tried every method, explaining the process, timer, treats, buying special underwear. He wasn't interested. I didn't pressure and bought pullups. It was seeing the kids on play dates going potty that made him try. When daddy came back from deployment he watched dad (since he was mostly around me and lots of other little girls he learned to sit first to pee) And he did preschool in the AM for a couple of hours. They have Before and Afterschool care for elementary school kids. On holidays they share some of the classrooms. The day before Christmas holidays, he saw all the "big" kids use the bathroom and has used it all by himself ever since. He was nearly 3.5 yrs by then. I'd say get to know when he goes and try to get him to use the potty then. We have a special seat on the big potty to make it smaller for him and it flips up for adults. Plus, we had a potty seat in the living room in case he had to go really fast. Oh, one way to get him used to the idea of going, I put him on the far end of the tub during bath time and turned the water on. He always peed then and I let him pee in the tub. Then just rinsed it away before filling the tub for a bath. He thought it was fun.Good luck!

Hello M.,
I have been threw this before although my boys were not that old when trained. My Doctor told me to take the boys to the potty as soon as they woke up every morning before giving them anything to eat or drink and sit them on the potty chair. That way every human has to wet when they awake due to your kidneys holding it in at night. I started this at about 18 months old. My oldest son responded well and was potty trained by 21 months. Then my second son was stubborn. My dad took him with him a few times with a few cherrios and pawpaw dunked the cherrios and then when he flushed he said bye bye cherrios and waved at them on the way down and they laughed and laughed and thats all it took for pawpaw to do it in one time and he was done but that took until he was almost 3. Make it fun.....put cherrios and as you know its hard to sink cherrios..yes you may have to clean things up from the game because little boys dont always aim correctly but then let him watch the elmo potty training as well. Elmo goes to the potty and then says peepee go down the hole and waves bye bye and if your dad or the babies dad is not there then the game starts with elmo. Wish you all the luck...Boys are way harder to raise than girls I have one girl and two boys...22, 20, 18 and one grandson 17 months and we are starting it with him now....hope ya have no more wet times.

Hello, M.
I know it makes a parent feel frustrated when things they think 'should' happen just don't. Potty training little boys is no exception. My grandson turned three in August, and refused to use the potty until a couple of months ago; they tried everything, to no avail. He'd wear pee and poop for days, and never say a word about it. But one day he just started going pee in the toilet. However, he is still pooping in his pants. My son and daughter-in-law seemed to feel like they were doing something wrong, but I reminded my son that he was the same way! It's part control - and toddlers ARE the boss of their poop, there's no two ways about it - and part development. So he wears pullups, and poops when and where he decides to. As a tongue-in-cheek reminder, there's never been a teenage cross the stage for their diploma wearing pullups, or with a passy in their mouth.
He will grow into using the potty; but it will have to be his idea, and his decision. In the meantime, make it as easy on yourself as possible.
Best of luck!

My almost 7 year old son was very stubborn about the whole potty thing. We started when he was 2, but he had absolutely no interest. When he was 3, he would go potty at daycare, but at home, it was a whole other ballgame. We thought he was nervous about the "big potty" so we tried every kid size potty we could find, that didn't work. He would play with them, but I don't remember him ever using it for what it was actually for.

After many loads of laundry, praying, scolding and talking to everyone else, we decided to keep him in pull ups and let nature take it's course.

When he was about 3 1/2, we started talking about going to school and how he wouldn't be able to go if he didn't use the potty. Now, I don't know if that conversation actually did anything, but right before his 4th birthday, he decided that he was going to wear is "big boy" underwear. I think because he felt it was his idea, and we had stopped nagging him completely, he was ready and just did it.

No matter what anyone says, boys are much harder to train, but they do get there, eventually. So hang in there!

My son is 4 1/2 years old, I tried for 2 1/2 years to make potty training fun....He NEVER showed any interest and like your son, he was perfectly content sitting around with a wet bottom.....Just about two months ago he decided on his own that he was ready...We have had very few accidents and he loves picking out his very own underwear....He doesn't need training pants in public anymore either!! I always encouraged it and brought him with me and would show him what was in the toilet when I was finished....Now he tells me to get out when he's doing his business!! thought our story might make you feel a little better.... Good luck!!!

P.S. As for the mom letting the preschool teacher make her child sit in his pee and go potty last..I wouldn't reccomend that "old school" method.... Just because somebody's been doing something for 30 years, it doesn't make it right!

I have 2 boys and 2 girls. When I started potty training my first son I didn't have a husband to teach him so I had to invent new ways to show him how. I took a hand fool of cherios and put them in the toilet then I told him to try to aim at them and shoot them. It worked very well. You might try this. Otherwise, if he is not interested be patient he just isn't ready, he will get tired of being wet and want to use the toilet.
A little about myself- I am 33 year old mother of 4 and wife of 15 years.

Hi!
I am not a parent, but have been a preschool teacher for 30 years. Boys are normal hard to potty train, not sure why. And the last few years I have had alot not to potty train until 3 1/2,. I know that is not what you wanted to hear. What I try to tell my parents is find something they like or like to do and say ok you can't have this or do it until you start going to the potty. It may take several days for them to do it or they may not. But if you tell them this you have to be ready to do it.
I had one little boy who was 3 and potty trained at school but not at home.Went himself all day at school but the minute he got home would wet and tell his mom. He was an only child and his mom was really wanting him trained. It was around Thanksgiving so I told her we could start telling him that Santa would bring him big boy underwear and he could give his pull-ups to Santa for another baby.But you have to mean it and so Christmas Eve they put the pull-ups under the tree and from then on he went to potty with no problems. Now that doesn't always work but it might. Good Luck!!!!!
P.

Have you try going in and setting down on the toilet an going. Letting him hear the sound. And the just saying good girl or good boy to yourself. I went potty. They are young and need to see and understand what they must learn. And maybe hearing your praising might make him think I want that too. It just an idea.

Have you tried T-T treats? We would give a m&m or a skittle or some small candy treat when he would go on the potty. Then after we did that for awhile I made a chart with stickers and he would place a sticker on the chart and when he had like four or five stickers he would get a small car out of a grab bag. My two boys love hot wheels so that was a great incentive for both of my boys. Hope it helps.

Throw something flushable in the toilet that he can aim at.. or put a sticker in there.. soemthing for him to aim at.. HE WILL LOVE IT!!

Try giving him a target... Boys like to sink things. Such as a square of toilet paper. Tell him to sink it. Make it fun like a game.

my kids were the same way, i learned the hard way that they will potty train when "they" are ready not when you want them to. you can try rewards like candy,money,ets. whatever you think will boost his attitude towards potty training. with my kids i used starburst,and money, they liked getting the money and putting it in a jar or piggy bank and seeing how much they could collect. good luck!

I had a friend who swore that if you let a child go naked for four days, they would be potty trained (you have to be ready to not go anywhere for this one). I tried it with my 2 1/2 year old...I thought, why not. It worked in 2 days. Before I started this, I had put his potty in the living room and told him he had to sit in his "special chair" in order to watch T.V. This got him used to the chair and a few weeks later I did the naked thing...it worked for us. Good luck!

I just went through this with my son. He took a little longer than even three, but he is also autistic. However, the best advice a friend gave me (and I have potty trained two older sons, with not many problems, so I assumed I knew what I was doing) was to take the pullups away. That's once he will atleast go pee in the potty. At that time, when he has an accident, don't make it a big deal, or punish him. Just be calm and say "let's clean you up" and remind him that he should go in the potty. A way we got our son interested was he had a good behavior chart. Things like clean his room before bed, good manners at supper, help feed the dog were on there. He also had a potty time spot. For every chore he got a sticker...for potty he had to get five stars a day for a sticker. When he got a certain amount of stickers he got to either rent a movie, go to McD's to play on their inside playground, or we went to the aquarium. We ended up buying a membership to the aquarium. But he is finally potty trained. We also had my husband take him when he would go pee...hope this helps!!

my sone is 2 and we are startin to introduce him to the potty little by little now..not that we think he will start ..just letting him know...but what we do is starting off in the morning when he wakes i say lets go pee pee...we ran to the bathroom he sits on the potty and trys and says bye bye then he flushes the musical potty and we wave bye bye..we do this after he eats..sometimes he has even tinkled a lil and was so surprised he giggled so much...he follows me in the bathroom almost everytime i go..even though we dont encourage it..we try to get him to follow daddy so he can feel like a big boy..but we do the same as we do when he tries to potty...since we have started doin this everytime he gets a wet or dirty diaper he comes to us to change it right away...hope this helped even a lil...good luck

My oldest son was the same way, and my best advice is to not get overly frustrated about it. You'll know when he's ready...when he tells you that he's wet, or if he goes off someplace private to have a bowel movement. Forcing him before he's ready will only stress you out and give you extra laundry with all of the dirty underwear. Also, if his dad is around, make a big deal when Daddy goes potty. My husband was great about that. I think it's a little hard for moms to teach little boys...we don't exactly have the same "parts", you know?! Caleb started using the toilet about 5 months after his 3rd birthday, and our pediatrician said that he has seen some boys be closer to 4 before they finally get the hang of things. Just be patient. He'll come around eventually.

Don't give in to the pressure that there is a certain age a kid should do something. It is each kid at his own pace. Mine, a boy was 3 1/2 when he finally did and we ran out of pull ups or diapers one day and I said, I don't have anymore, can you wear underwear til later but make sure you don't go in them, he said ok and by the end of the day he was like, you don't need to go get diapers, I will just use underwear. I know it feels really old and like you, I was out of my mind trying to potty train him at 2 and just gave up and thought for sure he won't go to kindergarten in pull ups so I will shoot for that. I relaxed, he relaxed and it just happened. They feel the pressure and I am sure it makes it harder. I used to send him to go potty with his dad so he could see what to do and that helped too, he wanted to be like daddy. hope that helps...

I own a licensed in home daycare and have potty trained MANY kids. I also have two boys ages 3 and 11 months.
The truth be told, if your son isn't at all interested in using the potty, and being wet or dirty doesn't bother him, then it is just going to take some patience until he is. There are however ways to possibly get him interested. Have you read him any books about pottying? Also, if he has his own potty you could pick out a few new books, toys, etc. that he can only play with if he is sitting on his potty. A trick that has worked for me is finding a treat such as jellybeans or M&Ms and reward him one for sitting on the potty and when he does start going, then rewarded him only when he uses the potty. Boys often take longer then girls to potty train and forcing them to use the potty when they are not ready only hinders their progress. Hope some of these suggestions help!

I have heard it takes boys longer to train than girls, and I have girls, so I don't really know, but I have a friend whose son will be 4 in August and he totally still wears diapers and has no interest in going on the potty, even though he's smart and has older siblings and goes to daycare, so he sees other kids doing it. Just relax. Your son will go when he's ready to go, and the bigger deal you make about it, the more control he'll have to annoy you. My older daughter will be 4 in a few weeks and has been potty trained for over a year. I kept pushing it and pushing it b/c we had a new baby coming and I didn't want two kids in diapers and she refused, refused, refused so I asked her WHEN will you go pee pee in the potty? She kept telling me "after Christmas". And I swear to God, after dinner on Christmas day she asked to use the potty, did it, stayed dry all the next day and never wore diapers again. She knew exactly what she was doing, and when she was ready, she did it. And your son will too. Just make it available but don't bug him about it and know that before he goes off to college, he will be in underpants, I promise :)

I think your son's reluctance is normal. Skip the underwear thing, he'll just feel pressured and will probably resist even more.
Try making the potty training more casual. Mention that he might want to try it, but don't force it. Kids come around to this at their own pace, and he'll try it at some point.
I remember thinking my kids would never get it and I got tired of the diapers too. They probaby were close to 3 when they actually mastered it.

Hi M.

I thought my son would never want to potty train either, but he finally did. We got something called a "peter potty" you can google it. It is a small toddler sized urinal. My son thought it was awesome! we let him run around naked and he would go use the urinal. We then had a small potty for pooping. he refused to pee sitting down, but he would use the small potty for pooping. He was afraid of "our" potty for a long time. The other thing we did was have friends over who's children are in underwear and all of a sudden he decided he wanted to be just like them! Good Luck to you.
J.

Both of my girls, now 5 and 3 1/2. Took a litte longer than I would have hoped for potty training. The best thing I can say is that let him go on his own time. For both of mine it was about 2 -4 weeks after their 3rd b-day that they just decided they were done with daipers. It was an easy transition and really no accidents. Potty training is the one thing that kids can control and it can become a power struggle. Good luck,it is hard. The one thing we did with my older daughter was that she really wanted a toy and we told her that when she went a whole day using the potty we would buy it for her. Again we just let her go on her own time and she reminded us of what we said when she decided she didn't like diapers. So that was a good reward she could look forward to.

he isn't ready yet...give him more time. some kids are 4 or 5 before they potty train but when they do they do it quick. try not to push him and he will do it on his own in his own time. get potty books to read with him but don't press the issue. if you think he has the capability (like he has done it many times before but is just being lazy now) put him in big boy undies so he can feel it. when he has an accident, have him help you clean it up and that should get him using the potty again. if he just isn't ready yet (his body just may not be giving him the feeling yet) then don't do this as punishment b/c he won't understand. good luck!