Hello, I have a 2 1/2 year old daughter who has been doing really well with potty training at home. I require that she sit on the potty every 2/2.5 hours or ask her if she needs to go. Sometimes, she just goes up to the potty on her own. We have been succesful with few accidents for several months.
My problem is that day care will not work with her. She has accidents so they require a diaper. So yesterday I put my foot down and said no more diapers after she ran out. Well she has had two accidents today and the Day care is in a snit because she didn't tell them she needed to go potty and it affects their ratio if they need to change her (ummm isn't it the same time away as changing a diaper????).
So I am VERY angry. I feel the day care has a responsibility to ask if she needs to go potty and to take her to sit on the potty at least every two hours - - which is the bill of goods they sold me when I started taking her there.
How unreasonable am I? Or aren't I? I feel this is hindering my daughters development (and my pocketbook). Need thoughts and experiences that others have had.
Well, apparantly at day care they have placed her on the potty over the last 2 days and she has still had accidents. The center is saying that I have an option to have her in diapers or plastic pants over her panties.
I'm looking at other centers but am saddened that my daughter will need to adapt to new caregivers. There are a people that she loves in the center.
I live in Royal Oak Michigan and typcially need care from 7-6 if anyone has day care options for me.
You're right and they're wrong. Talk to the director and also look into other day care arrangements.
I am a teacher at a child care center and I am outraged at the fact that they are not working with you! We always work with each parent and each individual request. Whether it be a child in a diaper, pull-up or underwear, we adhere to their requests and follow their requests to the best of our capabilities. About half of the children in my class are potty trained and the children are taken every hour to two hours depending on the child's needs. Accidents are going to happen and that is just part of the process. It takes the same amount of time to change a diaper as it does to change a child who has had an accident. How does that day care expect your child to become potty trained if they are not willing to work with you and your child? When the decision is made to start potty training, EVERYONE has to be on the same page. It is a proven fact that consistency works best. It is my opinion that you should speak with the director and if they are not willing to work with you, find a different day care that will work with you and your child. Child care is not cheap by any means and with the price that you pay, you should be able to get all of your and your child's needs met.
I'd find a different daycare. Children under 3 need reminders about pottying sometimes. It's too much to expect them to be perfect here, they are just so easily distracted.
My daughter has been accident free for eons, and this morning, she held it too long and ended up having an accident. I should have reminded her to go this morning, and I didn't, because I haven't had to as of late.
I worked in day care for several years, and we did have a potty program for kids that were transitioning into "big kid" pants. They were toileted before group time, then again before lunch, and yet again before outside play time in the afternoon.
I think it is perfectly reasonable to say NO to the diapers, and also to require them to potty her on a schedule. The ratio should not change if they have potty's in the room, and your are correct, it takes the same amount of time to change her whether she is in a diaper or not.
Maybe they are saying that it is happening at in-opportune times, but I would argue that if she were pottied on a schedule, there would not be accidents...
Good luck and I hope you can work it out, but if not...start looking somewhere that will incorporate your guidelines along with their own!
L.,
Although it’s been a few years... I have run center based care for children. This was a large corporate facility. In these centers they have a washroom in the class room for that reason. To potty train and still be able to see the other three (ratio). In my experience the teacher would bring all four in to potty train at the same time. Yes, it is true ratio changes once they are fully potty trained as they no longer need the time to change diapers or assist the child using the bathroom. The job of the day care provider is give the care that you cannot when you are away. They should have a little schedule for potty time for each child that is being potty trained. If they don’t need to potty train others they would have on sitting on the potty with books and change the other three at that time. I would suggest for you... go to a Child Time or a KinderCare take a tour of the 2’s & 3’s room. For informational purposes only. Then go back and touch base with your provider. Maybe this is the first time they have had to deal with this. If this is a home based or small center they may have to leave the class room every time. I would suggest they get a potty chair and do it that way, putting it by the changing table and put a little wall (some sort of block) around it. They need to help in this situation. It’s a part of the job. You are paying the higher fee for this service weather they are changing a diaper or helping you move to the next stage with potty training. I am in no way advertising for one of those facilities I listed. I just have been to those and I know that is how it works. Best of luck.
This is absolutely hindering her progress. Pull-ups are an impediment in my experience and opinion. I used to work at a daycare, and we set a timer for every 20 minutes, and we took the little ones to the potty. Sure, it was rough, and tiring, but isn't that raising children! Lol. We had adequate staff, so we would rotate, and this made it easier. Some parents insisted on pull-ups, so we did as they wished, but in general, I saw less accidents with underwear, and making sure that the children had access to a bathroom frequently. As the parent, you have a right to make your wishes known, and followed. If they are unwilling to facilitate your request, maybe you could find private care, at least for the remainder of the potty training process. I'm sorry you are in this situation. Good luck. : )
K.
Daycare, can only have so many children per teacher, when they are not potty trained that number is lower than when they are potty trained. To give the teacher more time to change diapers and take kids to the bathroom. Most places you pay a little more when your child is not potty trained, than you do once they are potty trained. I would speak to them and tell them that if they do not help you with this matter you will be forced to remove your child from their care.
At 2 1/2 she might not be totally ready, especially if she is in daycare. She probably just gets too busy to think of it on her own while she is in daycare. I don't think you can expect daycare to continue the training, but they could give her the courtesey of the question since that was the arrangement you had, they need to cooperate or quit complaining. Do you need to change daycare providers? As far as it being the same as changing a diaper...not so much. If she has an accident she has likely made a puddle in a chair or on the floor...more clean up. A diaper would be easier for the daycare person. You might talk with her and remind her of what a big girl she is now...wearing panties to "school" ....don't pee on Cinderella! Would she respond to a prize for a totally dry day at school? Can you tell her she has to take some responsibility in this, it's part of being a big girl in panties? Hang in there!
Find a new day care! They should work with whatever potty training system you're using, period. Adding diapers to a potty trained child is a TERRIBLE idea, and I know from personal experience that it can affect them to the point that they have problems as an adult! Put your foot down, NO MORE DIAPERS.
L.,
My advice would be to look into another daycare. My son's daycare takes kids who are potty training to the potty every 45 minutes. The want the kids in underwear and no diapers! Unfortunately, we live in the west suburbs, so I do not have a daycare recommendation for you. I hope you can find a better daycare in your area.
The whole demands on it, is making it worse.
Stress... itself, can sabotage a child's pottying progress or comfort with it.
Gee well, not all daycare facilities are like that.
Next, a child this age, does NOT necessarily "know" when they have to pee or poop.. .it has to do with their biological development of the myelin nerve sheath/their brain/and bladder connections... and then the child's 'awareness' of their body cues.
If it were so simple, then ALL kids that age would be potty trained 100% with NO accidents.
Keep in mind, that even if 100% potty trained.... a child WILL have accidents. Put it this way, our Pediatrician says it is normal... and even my daughter's Preschool teachers and Kindergarten teacher AND 1st Grade Teacher. Kids at these ages, STILL have accidents. And it is NORMAL. I know, because my daughter, had accidents, and I asked our Ped and her Teachers.
Getting in a 'snit' about it, per the Daycare and then the ensuing pressure and stress on the child, will NOT "fix" the issue. Nor her ability to 'master' pottying. It will not speed up the process.
I feel sorry for your daughter.
And that Daycare is pretty harsh.
NOT all Daycare places are like that. NOR for at that age.
all the best,
Susan
