Potty Training . . . - Albuquerque,NM

Updated on October 25, 2006
J.R. asks from Albuquerque, NM
14 answers

My daughter is almost 3 & I have had her in pull-ups for a while now. I have the "potty" video where she sits on her potty while watching it & I've also tried putting her in underwear. She uses both the pull-ups & underwear just as if they were diapers. She doesn't let me know before OR after that she has gone. She doesn't seem to mind being wet or dirty. She has peed in her potty now ONCE (I thought that might get her on the right track). Is she just not ready?? What do I do now?

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P.B.

answers from Tucson on

I was having the same problem with my son for a while. But once I realized how much he likes stickers...... I went to the dollar store and bought a box of "over 1500 stickers". I showed him the stickers and told him that if he pees in the potty, I'll give him 1 sticker, and if he poops in the potty, I'll give him 2 stickers. It was my sister's Idea and it works! Maybe you could try the sticker approach.

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E.C.

answers from Denver on

First off stop using the pull-ups. They don'y work. I had a hard time with them as well and they only confused my daughter with thinking it was okay to have an accident in them because that's what they were for. I read a book called How to Potty Train in one day. SOme people think it's a little extreme, but I used most of the methods in there and altered them somewhat, but it worked for us. My daughter was 22 months old and it literally only took one day. It sounds like she's just being lazy about it. My neighbor's daughter was the same way and wasn't potty trained until she was 3 1/2. She's old enough to know the difference and how to use the potty, but she just probably isn't that interested in it. Which is fine becaus ethat's how 90% of boys are, so please don't think I was being rude saying that. I would try the book and see if it helps, otherwise be very encouraging and a little bribery never hurt.

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K.C.

answers from Denver on

Hi, J.,
I agree with Claudia. When my now 9 year old was about 2 1/2, people started asking me why he wasnt' being potty trained,etc. I freaked out and vigorously tried to potty train him (first time mom, what did I know). He resisted so much, and I kept pushing so much, that he wasn't fully trained until he was closer to 5 yrs old! He still has bowel issues and sees the whole bathroom experience as a totally negative one! My 5 year old daughter, on the other hand, potty trained herself within 2 weeks because I told her she couldn't go to pre-school until she could use the potty, no pressure, just reality. She was not even 2 1/2 at the time. My third child was the same, I just said that if she wanted to wear big girl underpants like her sister, she had to be potty trained. Again, fully trained within a couple of weeks with almost no effort on my part! She was also barely 2 1/2. I really learned my lesson the hard way. If they want to be potty trained, they will be and nothing can stop them. If they aren't ready, all the coaxing, bribing, confiscating toys, book reading, various method trying in the world will not train them. Just give your girl time...she'll be just fine.

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D.C.

answers from Phoenix on

Hi,
I take my daughter to the potty every 30-40 minutes, yep it's a pain, but if I want to catch her before she pee's in the pull ups then I have to set the timer and be consistent with it, sometimes she goes and sometimes she doesn't, just praise her when she does, my daughter really isn't interested in the potty training so I'm not really pushing the issue, like one other gal said she won't be in high school not potty trained, and I doubt that she will go to kindergarten not potty trained, just try to stay calm and don't stress out over it, when she is finally potty trained one day you will look back on it and wonder why you worried so much about it! Their is a book out on how to potty train in a day, I looked at it online at Barnes and Noble so you might want to do some reading on the subject and see what they have to say, just be patient, I'm trying to tell myself the same thing, my 2 year old really isn't intersted in the toilet, oh she likes the toilet paper to throw in the toilet and she likes to flush it and she will sit on the big potty but she rarely uses it. so............
D.
Good luck, don't panic, it will all work out in the end!

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L.R.

answers from El Paso on

Hello J.,
First I want to ask if you picked out the Potty yourself, or if you let her pick it out? I am asking, because I have read in several parenting magazines that it is best to let the child pick out their potty, because they will pick out one that they like and will want to use it more often.

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J.L.

answers from Denver on

I don't think pull-ups are the answer. I know that kids are on their own time table. My 2 year old is almost there and is actually doing the BM's in the toliet also. Yeah. She is in a montesori. They use the clothe training pants only and the kids are potty trained well before they are 3. She does well at home if she is in her training pants or panties. She has her own potty. She has used both the big potty and her potty but seems to do better when she is in charge. I know if my daughter has an accident at school now, they have her help clean up the puddle which she doesn't like to do, so that is an incentive not to pee her pants. Be patient and consistant. Your daughter will get it soon....

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J.V.

answers from Phoenix on

I would try and find something that your daughter really likes and tell her everytime she goes to the potty she gets a prize. I would really praise her even if it's only once that she goes to the potty, make a big deal out of it so she feels special. I've aslo learned that the whole pull-up thing doesnt work quite well also.

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G.R.

answers from Tucson on

Hi J., I have a 2 1/2 year old that I'm potty training. What I've done was, and I got this from another mom, was put up a sheet of paper in the bathroom and everytime she goes potty we put a stamp on it. I've been dating them too so I can keep track of how good she does. Most of the time she goes all the time, but she looks forward to putting the stamp on the paper. If she pees in her pants she doesn't get a stamp on the paper or on her hand. It seems to be working, just an idea. My son was not this hard to train. All I had to do was put some fruit loops in the toilet and he went potty. LOL. I hope this helps.

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C.K.

answers from Santa Fe on

It seems like there is a lot of concern about putting a timetable on potty training. The emails to this site alone are predominantly about potty training and children not learning it fast enough.

Unlike adults, children are really not on a timetable. Lucky them! I would suggest not making a big deal of it. Let her wear a pullup or diapers to avoid accidents. Remember your daughter is not even three years old. What's the rush in learning to potty on the toilet? She will get it when she's good and ready. But I think too much emphasis backfires and children won't do things on our time. Don't worry. She won't be in diapers in high school :)

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C.B.

answers from Denver on

I am currently introducing my 15 month old to potty training, and everyone I have talked to about it says it helps a bunch to put them on their potty every two hours, I would say try that, and if that doesn't work try every hours, that way you can catch her before she is wet very long and maybe she will get use to being dry and not like it! I guess I have this easy, my daughter will take her diaper off when she is dirty and if she can't get it off, she will tell me she stinks! LOL! She actually will come up and say, "Mommy, ucky, phew!"

Good luck!

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K.L.

answers from Albuquerque on

Hi J.. My son didn't learn to use the potty until he was 3 and one month. It was very difficult. He didn't mind if he was wet either. What I had to do was let him run around naked and I kept the little potty in the living room right in front of the tv. I asked him every 10 to 15 minutes if he needed to make potty and had him sit down for a few minutes. The best thing is to just be patient. Good Luck!

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P.B.

answers from El Paso on

Oh, the joy of potty training :) I got to listen to my mother talk about how all of us were potty trained by 1 1/2 to 2 years! Of course, what she didn't mention was that in reality she took us to the bathroom every 45 minutes to an hour until we were more like 3 years old (3 1/2 for my brother) before we actually started doing it ourselves! Can you imagine taking your child to the bathroom every hour for 1 1/2 years?!

Well, my MIL told me about the potty training method she used on all four of her kids and she swore by it. It is from a book published in the early 70's called "Potty Training in Less Than a Day". I have used it for both of my kids (my daughter just last weekend!) I like it because you actually TRAIN your child what to do, to toilet themselves and you use positive reinforcement- constantly praising them for every step that they do correctly. The one thing I would disagree with the book about is at what age you can do it- they mention you can do it as early as 2 years old. I personally think 2 years is too early because although there may be some kids that are ready then, the majority are not ready until closer to 3 or even a little older (just my opinion!) Also, I would caution that your childs temperament can affect if this method is successful in a day or if it will take a little longer to reach the completely potty trained point. For example, I did it with my son when he was 3 yrs, 2 months old. We made it about 2 hours into the training before he completely refused to cooperate anymore. I thought the method was a complete failure and just put him back in pull-ups until I had the energy to try something else. Two months later he came to me and said he was ready to be a big boy and did not want diapers anymore. He remembered all of the training from our session, performed all of the pottying steps himself and did not have any accidents from that point on (until he was about 4 1/2, but that is not uncommon...) My son is VERY independent and head-strong- he learned from the training session, he just wasn't going to do it until HE decided to :) My daughter is a bit more laid back, but still very head-strong. Our training session lasted four hours and I was a little doubtfull that it was working (she is 3 yrs, 2 months). We did this last Saturday morning and it is now Tuesday. She has had about 1-2 accidents per day, but is doing better each day recognizing when she has to go and getting to the potty in time. I have continued the rewards beyond the training day (a sticker each time she goes in the potty and keeps her pants dry, a treat every time she gets 3 stickers) and it is keeping her interested in continuing the process. I anticipate complete potty-training (with the exception of nighttime- she still wears a diaper to bed) within a couple of weeks. (Way better than the months that my friends have talked about!!) Basically, I think the method is very good even if it is not completely successful in the half-day that they talk about in the book- because 1) It is POSITIVE, 2) it TEACHES them what they have to do and how to recognize when they need to go (I liken this to learning to drive a stick-shift car- when you have never done it before you do not know exactly when to shift gears. You have to practice listening to the engine and feeling the pull of the engine before you know when to shift. The same with a child, we know the feeling we get when we need to urinate or have a BM, but it is completely unknown to our kids until they practice over and over and feel that sensation each time.) Anyway, I'm sorry this is so long!! I hope the info is helpful. Good Luck, and most importantly- just try not to get too worried or frustrated. Your child will get potty-trained regardless what method you decide to use, and she will be fine and a few years down the road you will think "Why did I worry so much?!"

P.

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C.S.

answers from Phoenix on

Just give it more time and most important be patient and rewarding to her. Make it fun for her. For my daughter, I bought her little stickers and gave her stickers when she pottied in the potty chair/toilet, and even just for sitting on it and trying. I have heard other parents say they have punished thier child or repremanded them for peeing in there underwear, which I think is the worst thing you can do. When she is ready, you will know. My daughter was potty trained by 2, but around 3, she starting peeing her panties, even though she could have went to the potty. I would just tell her that if she had to go potty to tell me and I would help her. She went through that for about 2 months, and it never happened again.

35 year old mother of 1.

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C.T.

answers from Albuquerque on

Hi J.,
I have a two year old son who has been potty trained since he was 18 months old. All children learn at their own time but one thing that is important in potty training is the child needs to have interest in it. Also I have also been told that pull-ups are not very good when potty training, I never used them. Something that helped my son was running around naked and although it is too cold some days, you can let her out side in a backyard naked and let her watch herself pee. There are a bunch of tips out there, like when staring potty training, you shoudl give her somthing to drink and within fifteen minutes take her to the potty and do that for about two or three days and she will learn when she should go pee. My son is not an expert at using the potty either, he still has his accidents in his underwear but he is aware that he needs to potty (just too late) and he pees before we make it, also try to avoid taking her in public when you are taking her to the potty every ten or fiften minutes or so, for two reasons....one: it's a pain to run to the potty every ten minutes and, two: we all know the women's bathroom usually has a line making it less likely that she will make it. and ask her alot, when you think about her peeing it has probably been too long since her last potty break so take her or ask her and she will get it. It took me a while, and these are just things that worked for my son and me, I just would like to pass them on if there is a chance that they might help you or someone else. Most importantly, stay patient. Both of you will get it soon. :)

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