My 2 year old is doing an ok job potty training but its been 1 1/2 months and she is a stubborn child. I'm running out of fun ideas to make the potty interesting. Its always a happy thing and we always do the potty dance. We've done the stickers, the treats, the cool new underwear, the potty books, and before we go anyplace we use the potty. She always says no I don't want to, but then when she sits on the potty she goes. I feel like I have to bribe her in going. I don't know if she is just saying no to see if she has control of the situation or if she really doesn't have to go. I don't want this to turn into a bad experience for her and I'm running out of ideas. Some days we do great and other days we have a few accidents. I always tell her that's ok we will try next time because I'm trying to keep everything positive. Anyone have any ideas.
Hi K.,
Here are some web sites:
http://www.parentingtoddlers.com/pottytraining.html
www.pampers.com/potty-training.
http://www.kidica.com/raising-children/parenting-tips/toi...
Hope this helps. Good luck. D.
Go to MSNBC.com and watch the Today Show from I believe June 12th or June 11th so that you can see the Potty whisperer. They had a woman on there who runs a potty bootcamp. She says you do not ask your child if they have to go to the bathroom. I did not see the entire thing because I had to go to work. But she is able to potty train your child in 1 day. Al Roker said they used someone similar on his son and their methods work!
Maybe you need to wait awhile - 2 is a beginning age but sometimes 3 might be better. Also, what does she wear? real undies? I put real undies with the old fashioned rubber pants (yes, you can still buy them) over them. This way when she wets, she will feel the warm sensation and will not like sitting in that mess. It only took a couple of times having a wet butt that stopped my girl. Encourage her to read (look through a magazine) while sitting on the potty. I would tell my girls that they went to the potty "like Daddy." "Sit on the potty and read." Good Luck!
K.,
It sounds like you are doing a great job encouraging your little one to use the potty. And you are right, keeping things positive will help. But, you can not force her to be potty trained until she is ready. I do think that she is trying to tell you she doesn't have to go because she is trying to have control over her own body, but you are handling that right by asking her to at least try. The best thing you can do is set a schedule and stick to it. Working in day care, we take the children to the potty every two hours until they learn to realize that they have to go on their own. This method works really well, since most of the time it is about every two hours that they need to go. Keep up the good work with her, and before you know it she will be telling you she has to go (or you will find her in the potty one day going all by herself).
K., you're not alone; take a look at the responses to the Mamasource posting from Cami on June 7. She also was working on training a 2-year-old girl. Two is just too young for many kids to think ahead enough to get themselves to a potty before it's too late. It sounds like things are going better for you than you may realize -- at least she does finally get on the potty and sit, unlike some kids who just go ahead and "go" in their pants and act as if they don't care and refuse to go near a toilet! (Check out other Mamasource posts about potty training--yikes!) The stage of "no, I don't want/need to go" followed by going as soon as she's on the toilet is very, very common; it shows that she does need to go but does not "feel" the need or care enough yet to stop playing or whatever. Just keep taking her -- but don't let it turn into a battle of wills, which is where it sounds like it could be heading if you're getting frustrated and bored with her training. If she's only just two, you may have quite a while before she's fully ready to recognize the need to go, head for the bathroom herself, and get her clothes down and herself on the toilet in time. Those are a lot of steps for a small kid to master.
Dear K.,
Just to let you know, you will have to tell your daughter to go potty before you go out somewhere until she is in college, and that is only because you won't be there to tell her. My daughter is almost five. Mostly, I let her decide when she needs to go potty. But, when we are going out and I know it will be awhile before we are near another bathroom, I have to "strongly" encourage her to try. She tells me "no", too, and yet she always can go. A lady I was talking to at our doctor's office told me she still tells her daughters when they need to use the facilities (she recognizes their dance, my daughter would do a box step) and her daughters are in their thirties.
There is a saying that if you start training your child at 20 months, she'll catch on by 30 months. If you start at 28 months, she'll catch on by 30 months. Believe me, she's ahead of the game. When she's 2 1/2 she'll have fewer and fewer accidents. If she goes to preschool, you'll have a few days when some kid will tell her she can't use the bathroom and she'll wet herself rather than go to the bathroom. You'll have to convince her that that kid can't tell her she can't use the potty! But right now, you are fine and your daughter is fine.
As you said....you don't want this to turn into a bad experience....so just let it happen when it happens. There's no magic switch that should be flipped at 2 years old....Keep making it available, and discuss it, but don't rush or force it.
I reminded my kids every 20 minutes or so ....do you have to go....would you like to try...etc.... it's hard but reminding them helped. Whenever I knew I was going out in public for a while I put potty training panty/diapers on. Then even when we're out I would say I have to go even if you don't I need you to try. Good Luck. I trained all my kids by age 3.
Annie R
