Potty Training - Godley, TX

Updated on May 04, 2009
A.M. asks from Godley, TX
15 answers

I have a 2 year old son who is about to be 3 in a couple of months. He still wears diapers. I am a full-time nursing student and am having finals this week. After my finals are done I plan on starting potty training. I was wondering if there are any good ideas to help with this. We have tried once before but he just doesn't care where he goes. He knows when to change his diaper, how to change his diaper, etc. He is ready but isn't caring. Has anyone dealt with a child like him? What helped you? Any advice would be very helpful. Thanks in advance.
A. Mc

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M.C.

answers from Dallas on

I have not seen this yet posted. I let my son be nakey-bottomed at home. I had the potty in his playroom, next to the train table, where it was convenient for him to keep playing and go where it should go. If you can't stand to have any accidents, keep him outside. This weather is great for potty training.

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E.C.

answers from Dallas on

When you are ready to potty train; ditch the diapers and pullups. Take him very often; every 30-60 minutes on the potty. Prepare yourself for several accidents a day; by week four he may only have an accident every once in a while. Also, use that plastic underwear for a while to diminish accidents on carpet! good luck.

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J.C.

answers from Dallas on

1 - WAIT, WAIT, WAIT. A psychologist I know, said don't try until 3 and that was great advice. I know there is an internal pressure to get this done, but no child has ever gone to Kindergarten in diapers - I think. :)

2 - During training, You have to tell them its time. Don't ask him/her.

3 - When he/she is ready, it will happen. My child took 10 days and we've never regressed. I trained him during Thanksgiving break - when we had a lot of time at home - and he was 3 years and 2 months.

GOOD LUCK! :)

S.M.

answers from Dallas on

it is so different for each child I have three boys and they were all different, the first wouldn't go on the potty till I bought him his own potty bell, then he was happy to go and trained quick.. the second couldn't even go 15 minute without peeing in his pants so we went naked so he could "feel" it better, it worked but we then had to transition him back into clothes, he said with underwear he couldn't feel hi peepee wiggling, LOL. my third... we are still working on it, (all my boys trained after 3 1/2 yrs of age, if they are not ready don't force it. with my third he was potty trained in a week did fine for a bout a month or two (in pull ups) then all of a sudden he just quit going to the potty, I tried everything, bribes (which I used with all of my boys) timers at every 30 minutes, everything to get him to go on the potty again no no avail, so one day I just said if you want to be a big boy you will go on the potty, and I put him in underwear and set the timer for every 30 minutes, and he is finally coming around, still have trouble with the BM, which is funny because the first time around he would always BM in the potty, this time it seems to be the thing he most resists, go figure... if you find something that works let me know!!! just trying to be patient! but I think we are almost there.

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L.W.

answers from Dallas on

a recall a friend of mine that had a stubborn boy...at three dean refused to be pt. dean had day surgery and could not wear his diaper but could wear "big" boy underwear. after a few "accidents" my friend in disgust let dean run around the house without undies... well dean figured out pretty quick not to soil the floor/himself and trained himself to utilize the toliet. and the rest is pt history!

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J.B.

answers from Dallas on

I potty trained both my children after they were 3 1/2 - a boy & a girl . I am a wait and watch Mum - meaning I wait to see when they are ready. I did this with pre-school as well and had great success on both issues. I also waited until they understood consequences. I knew my son's weakness was TV, so I explained what we were going to do for a few days before - out with pull-ups and in with underpants. The first 1 to 2 hours he thought this was fun & then said he didn't want to do it anymore. My response when then you won't watch any TV. He didn't believe me... He was potty trained in 4 hours with never an accident. I did the same with my daughter.. it took about 2 days. Pre-school took 20 mins for my son & my daughter (with a little prep work for a week) was fine from the beginning. My advice to you if you want an easy time is to watch your son & you will know when he is ready. Something changes & you are both ready. I hope this helped you.

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D.W.

answers from Dallas on

Hi Ashey,

I'll be in the same situation as you are very soon. I have 3 kids: a 9 yr old girl, a 6 yr old boy and a 2 yr old girl. They say boys take longer and are harder, but that was not really true for my older kids. Both had no interest even though they could do it. If they don't care, it is not worth it to try. I realized after the first 2 that I can encourage them, but I can't make them do it. They have to DECIDE that they WANT to do it. If they don't, you'll be cleaning a lot of poopy underwear. I got lots of pressure from my Mom to get my kids potty trained by age 2 or 3. Easier said than done. Be very careful with punishment. Never punish them for accidents. They already feel badly about it and punishing them or yelling at them or shaming them will make it very hard for them to want to try again. If you find that you are cleaning more up than not after a couple of months, and it doesn't improve, then that is a clue to back off the potty training and wait until they tell you that they want to.

For my oldest, I tried the week of her 3rd BD. I had to put her back into diapers after 4 days because she refused to have a BM on the potty. Then, when she was 3 yrs and 4 months old, I asked her to give up her diapers, and to my surprise, she agreed. After 3 week of trying and with some success, but there was little improvement, we stayed home for 2 weeks. She got to play and watch TV. We just didn't go outside either because the weather was bad. She would ask when she could go to the mall or Mother's day out, and I'd tell her when she was potty trained. One nice day after almost 2 weeks home, I took her to the front yard to water the flowers. Her first taste of freedom. I asked her to go potty first, but she didn't. Five minutes outside she went poop in her pants. We went inside immediately. She was so bored after being cooped up at home for 2 weeks that she realized after that it was easier for her to go on the potty than not. This is what worked for her. When we finally ventured out to the store one day, we went to the potty first so she could see where it was and how far it was. I told her she had to go on the potty because I didn't bring any diapers for her. I told her if she told me we could stay at the store. I knew she could do it since she had been going so well. She did great and told me right away. From then on it was easier and easier. I know that not everyone can stay home, but if you can, it helped me.

With my son, I couldn't stay home. I tried everything. I tried bribery with candy and getting him his favorite underwear, which he used like diapers. I got him a toy as a reward if he went #2 on the potty 5 times in a row. The more I pushed the more he resisted. Also, my older daughter thought she was helping, but I found that she was undoing his poopy diapers that allowed him to smear the poop all over himself and all over his walls in his room. Yuck! It was horrible. I grounded my daughter from TV for a week and instructed her to tell me if he has a poopy diaper instead of opening them! However, I reluctantly put my son back in his diapers because he was using his underwear like diapers more than he should, and I was tired of throwing away or cleaning underwear. I told him that I couldn't make him go, so when he's ready, to let me know. He was 3 yrs and 9 months old when he finally decided he wanted to do it. I thought Pre- school would help with peer pressure, but he didn't care still. He began to care about what his teacher thought. He asked me for his underwear because he didn't want his teacher to see him in a diaper at school. Then after a month of some success, I had given him tokens for going potty and we went to Target so he could buy summer toys for the pool with his tokens. It finally clicked that he would be rewarded for continued use of the potty. He is a heavy sleeper so he still wears Pullups at night. Otherwise, you will be waking up every night to take him to the potty and you'll get tired of that after a week. It is very common for kids, especially boys, to be potty trained during the day and not at night. My daughter just woke up on her own and went potty in the night. She also woke up dry more often until she was dry all the time. My son wants be dry, but he can't consistently yet. I read that it can be this way for up to 8 yrs old. The rule is that he has to change into underwear as soon as he wakes up though.

So with my 3rd one. I am not even going to try. I'm going to wait for her to tell me she wants underwear. I let her go with me to the potty to see what it is. I can wait for when she is ready. If anyone gives me grief about it, I'll just ignore them. Each child is different and at their own pace so you can encourage them, but don't push it if they are not ready. You'll just get anxious and they will get anxious. No one ever is in diapers in college! It will happen. Good luck to us all!

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A.D.

answers from Dallas on

Like most others have said, if he's not interested, don't push it! It will happen. We just went through this and it took forever because we did push it. It'll only make you crazy ;-). It helps if he's somewhat predictable and you have to be consistent.
That said, don't use pull-ups, stick with training pants so he can feel the wetness, you can buy them at Wal-Mart, Target, Babies R US or JC Penney. (I found the ones from Penny's to be more absorbent). Sweatpants/sweatshorts are also great for containing the wetness when there is an accident. It also helps if he can run around the house without pants, we only had one accident this way. He tended to forget when he had pants on but when naked he usually remembered to run to the bathroom, he preferred to "stand-up".
Rewards work if your child is reward motivated. We bought a small gumball machine because my son loves to chew gum and get gumballs. We did a sticker chart as well and when the sticker chart was filled he got a matchbox car but that one didn't work as well as the gumballs.
No matter what it's a process and it's going to take patience on your part- good luck!

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C.T.

answers from Dallas on

My opinion is that if he doesn't show intrest then he isn't ready. Two is very young to potty train a boy. Maybe you should give him another 6 months-a year before you start.

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V.C.

answers from Dallas on

I have an almost 3 year old son too. He turns 3 in June. We started potty training Spring Break. We just put him in underwear. I've been told that if you do that for about a week that they will start to go on the potty, because they don't like the mess. Well, mine didn't. It took us about 4 weeks to finally get a system down. Just when I felt we were making a break through, he would have a day of not going to the potty. I was going a little crazy by the whole thing, but I had encouragement from friends and co-workers to keep going and don't put him back in pull-ups. So, I kept going.

Now, he is somewhat potty trained. We take him to the potty every 2-4 hours, and he wakes up dry most mornings. Friday he did actually go to the potty at school on his own without prompting. He isn't pooping on the potty yet, but I have been told that can be a separate issue. I don't mind the poop as much since it doesn't drip down the legs and into the shoes and socks.

For easier clean up you can use training pants and plastic pants. I just cleaned up the floor when he didn't make it to the potty. I could definitely tell when he was going, because he would disappear from us.

We seemed to have more compliance when we stayed positive with words of praise and rewards (lots and lots of hot wheel cars, candy and anything else he wants). We also give him a cold rinse (put him in the bath naked waist down and turn on the cold water and use a wash cloth to clean his private area, legs & feet - our sprayer is too hard to use or I would do that) when he doesn't make it to the potty to give him a reason to go on the potty instead. This helped immensely to discourage going in his underwear. He hates it. I felt so bad doing it at first, but he didn't care otherwise.

Good luck & keep on going. Kramer, my son is stubborn, but we are making progress. If your son can change his diapers, I think he is ready with a little bit of encouragement:-) It is hard to stay positive every single time, but the less you can respond to "accidents" the better off you will be regarding the power struggle.
V.

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A.H.

answers from Dallas on

Two mothers have already shared that if he's not interested then he's not ready. That's true. You can't force him to go and yes, that will backfire. My son did much better with a combination of training at home and peer pressure at school/daycare.

I'm not sure I'm a fan of facing the boy backwards on the toilet. My son was more interested in being a big boy and sitting like the big boys sit. If you're concerned about him peeing out while sitting on the toilet, they do make potty seats with a pee guard that work really well.

When you do start with him, you'll have to be very consistent in taking him to the toilet every 2-4 hours, especially after eating or drinking.

I again reiterate what many of the other mothers are saying. PLEASE do not punish or scold him if he has accidents. He's going to have accidents. Encourage him saying, "that's okay, accidents happen, you can do better next time."

Boys are all about games. If you can make it fun, somehow turn it into a game.

Going poop takes time to learn and my son didn't quite understand at first. I sat down on a stool in front of him as he was going potty and talked with him for a bit on what if feels like to go poop. I then scruntched up my face and tightened my fists and playfully said through clenched teeth, "you just have to SQUUEEEEZZEEEE it out." He thought that was hilarious and he tried to squeeze too. Luckily one of those times, he was able to squeeze out the poop and that did the trick.

Also, at first after some training, my son was able to sleep through the night without any accidents. That didn't last long. He's a deep sleeper and he had accidents often. I ended up purchasing a plastic mattress cover (highly recommend) because he would wet often during the night, even through pull ups sometimes. We adjusted his schedule and didn't allow drinks or food an hour 1/2 before bed. He'd still wet. That went on for awhile. He just wore pull-ups at night time.

My son was finally able to sleep through the night without wetting shortly after he turned 5. This may not be something that your son struggles with but if it is, know that it's normal and he should grow out of it gradually. Every child is different. Just wanted to prepare you.

Good luck.

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S.M.

answers from Dallas on

Here are a few ideas. Have him sit on the potty backwards - facing the back of the toilet. This makes it easier for little boys to get the pee in the toilet. (forwards for poo, or he can still sit backwards if he prefers). Also, get rid of the diapers, pullups, etc. Put him in undies and make a decision that this day/week, etc. we are going to potty train. Keep outings short and not frequent. Have him at home, bring him to the potty every 1/2 hour or so, and use choices "do you want to potty downstairs or upstairs this time." "do you want to skip to the potty or run?" But, if he has accidents in this undies, he's more likely to go to the potty instead of if he's wearing a pull up (a glorified diaper). As for him not caring...I don't know how to deal with that other than to say "you are a big boy now, so you are going to start using the potty" and just getting rid of the diapers.

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J.H.

answers from Amarillo on

About every two or three hours sound excited and take him to potty, and if you set them on it, and you are hhoping it is about time for a poop, as they some times do this around the same time every day, let them look at a little book, so they will sit still long enough to go, and then I have raisens or something like that and acted so pround that they wwere a big boy. You don't have to do the rewards very long, but at first they seem to think that is a big deal.

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B.T.

answers from Dallas on

A.,
I never had a single moment of difficulty or uncertainty in potty-training my 4 children. (...They're all grown now, and they turned out well.) What I did is most likely a product of being kind of "old-school": I modeled it for them. Both my husband and I, when a kid was clearly becoming receptive to potty-training, would take him/her to the bathroom with us, and let them see us go to the bathroom, nothing prurient or shocking, just letting them see the naturalness of it, all the while conducting a kind of running commentary about what we were doing. They were toddlers at that point, about two-ish ...each of them, and they never seemed to have any problem with it. It was natural, they saw that and how we did it, and when it was time, they took to it quite readily.
We never remonstrated or disciplined when they forgot, made a mistake, or didn't make it. There were never any control issues. They just saw that we did that ourselves, and it made sense to them and fell into place for them when the time was right, ie., when their little valves, sphincters, nerve endings and awarenesses were fully ready. They were never pressured, no trauma. Just modeled. it worked like a charm! All were fully comfortable with it some time during their second year or slightly thereafter.
Best wishes!
B.

C.R.

answers from Dallas on

Hi A.,
If he's not showing any interest then he's not ready. In order to potty train him HE has to be interested in doing it. If you force the issue I promise it will backfire and it will take longer for him to learn the skill. When he does seem interested keep it always positive. No punishment for mistakes just treats for using the potty and you'll save yourself alot of unwanted grief. I just always took the attitude of knowing that I was going to be patience in this area so it never bothered me. Be careful what expectations you have that is in your child's control and not yours. It will cause alot of frustrations for you and him.

Best Regards,
C.

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